Story Time Contest - Round 5 Scores, Final Scores and BONUS!

[heaven]

Foreword

I have been viewing and participating in contests for about a year now. I have noticed that most contests deal with making sims and then there are the build contests. I wanted to do something a bit different that would still challenge the contestants while still being fun to participate in.

Qualifications
Participated through all rounds of MTS Official Foundations contest
Was judge for Lifelover’s Build to Plan contest
Was emergency judge for missroxor’s Make Me a Model contest

http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30199_110907162000Story Time Banner03.jpg

Introduction

Each contestant will create a main character (see rules below for guidelines) and write a story about them in 4-5 chapters. Sounds easy? There are some twists: each round will consist of certain events/things that need to take place in the story as well as incorporating a certain line/excerpt from a book that will have to be in the contestant’s entry. The story must flow from round to round, with the same main character, finally coming to a conclusion. It can be a happy ending, or tragic or a cliffhanger (maybe this will prompt people to continue in the Sims Stories forum) or somewhere between those.

The contest will be set up in 5 rounds; starting with your introduction and ending with your conclusion. Each round will be a week long. Extensions may be granted but are not likely so please use your time wisely!

Rules
Contest Rules:
1. Forum rules apply.
2. Sims 2 and 3 allowed.
3. One entry is allowed per person. Round 1 counts as your application round.
4. CC is allowed. However, please make sure to follow MTS rules for CC; no pay content. See below for scoring related to CC.
5. There will be no eliminations.
6. Photoshop is at the extreme minimal. By this, I mean that you can add a border to your pictures, but that is it. No words, no adding images, no changing backgrounds, lighting, etc.
7. No recycled or “borrowed stories”. All stories must be original and new. If you have a story in the Sims Stories forum you MAY NOT use it. If I find you have (or have borrowed a story from the forum or anywhere else) you will be disqualified.
8. There will be a photo limit per story as well as word limit per picture. This will be stated per round. Compliance to these limits is scored. To get your word count, either use Microsoft Word, if you have it, or Word Counter (http://wordcountertool.com/). After testing several of the Round 1 entries, this was the most accurate in terms of matching Word. Pictures should follow upload guidelines: minimum of 800x600 up to a maximum of 1280x1060.
9. Grammar and spelling will NOT be judged. Please try your best but it is more important that the story is understandable and flows.
Story Rules:
10. Stories may be whatever genre and setting each contestant desires: drama, romance, fantasy, etc but make sure it can flow throughout the rounds and that CC adherence is possible.
11. Likewise, characters may be any age or species. Remember, the story will come to a conclusion; young adult or adult sims may be easiest but selection is up to the contestant’s discretion.
12. All main characters must be made by the contestant and must fit your story.
13. Stories may be written in first or third person. Again, this is up to contestant discretion but be consistent throughout all rounds.
14. Events/things and excerpt must be included each round. Excerpts must be written exactly the way they appear. If you choose to change the tense or wording, that is up to you but you risk losing points.
15. Story must be PG-13. Also, please keep cursing to a minimum and RELEVANT to your story or character. I'm not saying you CAN'T use curse words but please be thoughtful in how/why the character would use those words.
Round Explanations:
Each round will be explained in detail below. Bonus Rounds may include introducing a character or incorporating a second line into the story. Bonus Rounds are done in conjunction with your entry, not as a separate one.
There is a list below that has a list of 20 events/objects/themes (5 rounds, 2 per round means that you will only use half) that you may choose from; 2 per chapter. Additionally, you may not reuse any idea in subsequent chapters; once YOU use it, it's gone. Previously used themes may be discussed in subsequent chapters as long as there are 2 new ones. Also, you may not use new addition to family and twins, betrayal and forbidden love or funeral and tomb in the same chapter. Anything else goes and you can work it in however you want. Everything should be base game compatible. (Tomb, graduation, etc, does not have to be the expansion versions, be creative).
Wedding
Twins
Funeral
Tomb
Adventure
Paranormal Character
Graduation
Ambrosia
Meteor Shower
Mysterious Gnome
New Addition to Family
Emperor of Evil
Dish best served cold
Chance meeting
Betrayal
Forbidden love
Hobo/homeless
Murder
Dog days
Financial Times
Please remember that not all events/objects/themes have to be taken literally and at face value. It's about creativity as long as it is clear what two things you chose for each entry. You should not have to list your choices for the judges.

Prizes

Currently there are no prizes available, it’s just for fun. Anyone wishing to donate a prize please PM me.

Contestants
Contesant,Round 1 Link / Score,Round 2 Link / Score,Round 3 Link / Score,Round 4 Link / Score,Round 5 Link / Score
Shhh ,215 | Round 1 (http://www.modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3663843&postcount=41),0 | No Entry,0 | No Entry, 0 | No Entry,0 | No Entry
ReyaD ,292 | Round 1 (http://www.modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3664760&postcount=52),290 | Round 2 (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3685687&postcount=238),288 | Round 3 (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3697411&postcount=312), 0 | No Entry,0 | No Entry
waterjay ,282 | Round 1 (http://www.modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3668411&postcount=85),268 | Round 2 (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3679486&postcount=217),282 | Round 3 (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3697853&postcount=317), 0 | No Entry,0 | No Entry
blackivy ,274 | Round 1 (http://www.modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3669139&postcount=101),282 | Round 2 (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3686365&postcount=243),284 | Round 3 (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3697328&postcount=309), 0 | No Entry,0 | No Entry
Myshia,208.5 | Round 1 (http://www.modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3669810&postcount=107),226.5 | Round 2 (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3686931&postcount=252),0 | No Entry, 0 | No Entry,0 | No Entry
LadyAwesome ,292 | Round 1 (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3672901&postcount=114),271 | Round 2 (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3687008&postcount=254),301 | Round 3 (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3697414&postcount=313), 291 | Round 4 (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3707604&postcount=357) , 302 | Round 5 (http://www.modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3718656&postcount=376)
Tamlyn,300 | Round 1 (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3673219&postcount=123),306 | Round 2 (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3686807&postcount=247),319 | Round 3 (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3697494&postcount=314), 307 | Round 4 (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3709187&postcount=361) , 315 | Round 5 (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3721736&postcount=378)
Elexis ,271 | Round 1 (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3673560&postcount=134),296 | Round 2 (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3686993&postcount=253),309 | Round 3 (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3698019&postcount=324), 309 | Round 4 (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3712110&postcount=365) , 311 | Round 5 (http://www.modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3723791&postcount=386)
whitewaterwood ,261 | Round 1 (http://www.modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3674202&postcount=142),286.5 | Round 2 (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3687389&postcount=266),259 | Round 3 (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3697983&postcount=322), 0 | No Entry,0 | No Entry
Morphead ,200.5 | Round 1 (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3674248&postcount=147),157 | Round 2 (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3687166&postcount=260),0 | No Entry, 0 | No Entry,0 | No Entry
missroxor ,243.5 | Round 1 (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3674290&postcount=148),289 | Round 2 (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3686835&postcount=249),304 | Round 3 (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3697602&postcount=315), 306 | Round 4 (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3707594&postcount=355) , 316 | Round 5 (http://www.modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3723579&postcount=384)
Buckley ,297 | Round 1 (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3674401&postcount=151),300 | Round 2 (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3686733&postcount=246),0 | No Entry, 0 | No Entry,0 | No Entry


Score Details
Round 1 Scores (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3676252&postcount=187)
Round 2 Scores (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3690606&postcount=288)
Round 3 Scores (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3700123&postcount=330)
Round 4 Scores (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3713431&postcount=370)
Round 5 Scores (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3726653&postcount=393)
Final Scores and Superlatives (http://modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3726656&postcount=394)

Judges
1. GigaRevival
2. angiebeno
3. leesester

Emergency Judges
1. heaven_sent_8_18

Judging Parameters

1. CREATIVITY 40 points overall:
Originality of story 10 points: Is your story unique and interesting? If it is a specific archetype do you use an unexpected twist?
Use of excerpt 10 points: Is your excerpt expected? Does it blend in with the story or is it plopped randomly in?
Development of character 10 points: Are your characters flat, one sided sims or realistic and multi-faceted? Do they have believable reactions/dialogue? Are the extraneous characters fluff or do they add to the story?
Events 10 points: Do the events you choose work well with the overall plot? Are the two themes tied together well? Do they make sense to be used together?

2. SCENES 30 points overall:
# of pictures 10 points: Did you have the correct number of pictures for the round?
Mood, storyline 10 points: Did your words mentally set a stage for us? Did the use of descriptive words help us “feel” the scene?
Use of props/staging 10 points: Did you choose appropriate scenes/props for the mood you were going for? If you are doing medieval, did you have a TV in the background? Are your angles relevant to the specific scene they are portraying?

3. FLOW 20 points: Does the story flow cohesively from one point to the next? Are your rounds consistent with each other?

4. RULE ADHERENCE 5 points: Were the events and excerpt included in your entry? Did you use photoshop? Are your word limits in line with what is stated each round? Did you use pay content? Did you use the entry form? (It is up to each judge to determine how much to penalize if a contestant goes over the word max up to a max of 5 points)

5. CC 5 points: Exclusion of CC makes creators really think and be creative with what is in game. Therefore, contestants will receive 5 points if no CC is used and 0 points if any is used. You MUST state if you used CC at the bottom of your entry. If you do not, it will be assumed that it has been used. Note: Custom worlds, poses, and store content does not count as CC.
AMENDMENT to CC RULE: Skin/hair/eyes can be used without penalty but please be sure to let judges know that you used them. Other CC, including build/buy content or clothes/accessories will count towards the points. For contestants with TS2, recolors for Maxis objects are also allowed and will not be counted as CC.

6. BONUS 10 points: Did your use of the bonus content really help move your story along? If so, how well? Was it used in an expected way? (Judges may award between 0 for no use at all and 10 for well incorporated, creative use of bonus)

Constructive criticism from the judges is encouraged but not mandatory.

Helpful Links

1. How to Write a Good Story (http://www.modthesims.info/article.php?t=337553): Used for the Sims Stories Forum but useful here as well. Continuity and Picture chapters are particularly helpful.
2. Picture Taking Tutorial (http://www.modthesims.info/showthread.php?t=337362): Can be used in Conjunction with above to get great pictures.
3. Elements of a Short Story (http://hrsbstaff.ednet.ns.ca/engramja/elements.html): May help you better plot things out and get a better of idea of how to navigate a short story.


http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30200_110907162142Round 1.jpg
Round 1 – Prologue Countdown (http://www.timeanddate.com/counters/customcounter.html?msg=Story+Time+Contest%3A+Round+1+Deadline&month=10&day=22&year=2011&hour=06&min=59&sec=59&p0=770)
Guidelines: Round 1 should set the tone of your story. From here, readers should be able to get a general idea what genre you are going for. This can be set up through a prologue or just diving straight into your first chapter. Remember, each subsequent chapter will need to add to this one. This round will be a little longer than the rest, as stated above. Submit 10 pictures, approximately 100 words per picture (roughly 1 paragraph).

Excerpt: “It was times like these when I thought my father, who hated guns and had never been to any wars, was the bravest man who ever lived.” Harper Lee, To Kill a Mockingbird

Round 1: Bonus Worth 10 points: Include second excerpt: “By watching her, I began to think there was some skill involved in being a girl.” Harper Lee, To Kill a Mockingbird

http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30964_111022103951Round 2.jpg
Round 2 – Rising Action - Countdown (http://www.timeanddate.com/counters/customcounter.html?msg=Round+2+Deadline&month=11&day=02&year=2011&hour=06&min=59&sec=59&p0=770)
Round 2 should be where your audience can begin to see what the climax of the story will be. You should be building up to something whether it be struggle or joy but this chapter should help lead us there. Because you are building up more and possibly have more dialogue, you need a maximum of 15 pictures, minimum of 10 and a maximum of 2,000 words, minimum of 1,200.

Excerpt: Choose ONE of the following quotes.
“Burdens are for shoulders strong enough to carry them.” Margaret Mitchell, Gone With the Wind
“It was better to know the worst than to wonder.” Margaret Mitchell, Gone With the Wind

Round 2: Bonus Worth 10 points
Introduce Jude Campbell into your story. He should give your character a different version of events, help your character see things from another/his point of view. It’s not necessary for your character to agree with him and he does not have to appear after this chapter. He can if you want him to though. You may change his clothes and hair and give him different traits/personality but not his overall looks; he should still be recognizable as the sim you downloaded. You are NOT allowed to age him. He is an adult (not young adult) but if you would like to add make up to give him some wrinkles or scars or eyebags or anything else you may. You may also change his hair color to whatever you would like. Make sure to get the right version for your game Ts2/Ts3!

Please include a brief summary (around 100 words) before your entry. See Example (http://www.modthesims.info/showpost.php?p=3674844&postcount=158)

Also, please include information listed below your entry:
Current Events: What did you use this chapter?
Previous Events: Here you will keep a running list of what you have already used.
Word Count:
CC Used: Allowed ____, Penalized: ____ This can be as simple as a yes/no response

http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30965_111022110121Jude Campbell.jpg
ForeverCamp is my TS2 creator for Jude Campbell so a huge thank you to her!

http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/31447_111102122637Round 3.jpg
Round 3 - Climax - Countdown (http://timeanddate.com/counters/customcounter.html?msg=Round+3+Deadline&month=11&day=12&year=2011&hour=11&min=59&sec=59&p0=770)
This should be the center conflict and turning point in your story. Leave your readers hanging on the edge of their seat? What could happen? Will things be resolved or not? You need a maximum of 13 pictures, minimum of 10 and a maximum of 1,500 words, minimum of 1,000.

Excerpt: “I wished to be loved by another, but I desire no man's pity.” J.R.R Tolkien, The Return of the King

Round 3: Bonus Worth 10 points
Include second excerpt: “Time doesn't seem to pass here: it just is.” J.R.R. Tolkien, The Fellowship of the Ring OR include an extra 300 words and 3 pictures (in black and white) of a flashback to a time before your story began. (If you choose the second option, you need a maximum of 16 pictures, minimum of 13 and a maximum of 1,800 words, minimum of 1,300.

Please include a brief summary (around 100 words) before your entry.

Also, please include information listed below your entry:
Current Events: What did you use this chapter?
Previous Events: Here you will keep a running list of what you have already used.
Word Count:
CC Used: Allowed ____, Penalized: ____ This can be as simple as a yes/no response

http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/31696_111112151010Round 4.jpg
Round 4 – Falling Action - Countdown (http://www.timeanddate.com/counters/customcounter.html?msg=Round+4+Countdown&month=11&day=28&year=2011&hour=6&min=59&sec=59&p0=770)
Your story should start coming together at this point. Will your conflict that has been introduced be resolved? Your readers should be able to tell where the story is going and if your character will be able to settle the issues. you need a maximum of 12 pictures, minimum of 9 and a maximum of 1,200 words, minimum of 1,000.

Excerpt: Choose ONE of the following quotes.
“Never take an oath unless you're sure you would rather die than break it” Ken Follett, Pillars of the Earth
“Hunger is the best seasoning.” Ken Follett, Pillars of the Earth

Round 4: Bonus Worth 10 points
Choose a third event/theme from the main list of 20 and incorporate it along with the 2 required ones.

Please include a brief summary (around 100 words) before your entry.

Also, please include information listed below your entry:
Current Events: What did you use this chapter?
Previous Events: Here you will keep a running list of what you have already used.
Word Count:
CC Used: Allowed ____, Penalized: ____ This can be as simple as a yes/no response

http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/31980_111123093727Round 5.jpg
Round 5 – Conclusion - Countdown (http://www.timeanddate.com/counters/customcounter.html?msg=Final+Round%3A+Champagne+Upon+Completion!&month=12&day=10&year=2011&hour=06&min=59&sec=59&p0=770)
This is the final series of events. Will your characters have a happy ending? Is everything all wrapped up in a neat bow? Whatever direction your story took, your readers should feel some sense of closure. If you choose to make it a cliffhanger, close out the direction your story took to begin with and make the cliffhanger a new twist. Maximum word allowance is 2000, maximum picture allowance is 15.

Excerpt: Choose ONE of the following quotes.
“You've got to be quick on your feet in this world if you want to survive. Though once you know the rules, it’s not too hard to play the game.” Bryce Courtenay, The Power of One
“I learned that in each of us there burns a flame of independence that must never be allowed to go out. That as long as it exists within us we cannot be destroyed.” Bryce Courtenay, The Power of One
“But I was still alive, and in my book, where there's life, there's hope.” Bryce Courtenay, The Power of One

Round 5: Bonus Worth 10 points
Pick a quote. Any quote. Yes, I mean any. Choose from a book that you like and use it.

Please include a brief summary (around 100 words) before your entry.

Also, please include information listed below your entry:
Current Events: What did you use this chapter?
Previous Events: Here you will keep a running list of what you have already used.
Word Count:
CC Used: Allowed ____, Penalized: ____ This can be as simple as a yes/no response
Bonus Quote: If used, state the quote, author, and book, like each excerpt has been formatted previously.

[HystericalParoxysm]

Contest Approved

Do not post replies and/or contest applications before the contest host has checked in on this thread, or your post will be deleted.
DO NOT WRITE USELESS POSTS like "Hey cool contest, I think I might join." Reserve type posts and useless posts about coming back with an application will be deleted.

[heaven]

Okay, I am checking in. As stated above, the first round will be a little longer than the rest. It will end on October 15 at approximately 7am, PST (to give all you procrastinators time to burn the midnight oil). For specific amount of time yet, see the countdown. Any entries entered or edited after that time will be disqualified. Feel free to start entering now!

[missroxor]

Ooh, this looks like fun! I've never really written a full story before, certainly not with sims/pictures etc (not including your backstory/sim contest) but I think I wanna accept the challenge. I don't have any plans to be out the country in the next 5 weeks so should be here for the duration, lol.

Just wanted to clarify a quick Q: the events/items...do we just have to choose any 10 (but not the combinations you already mentioned) or does it have to be an even split of 5 events and 5 items, one each per chapter?

Also, I might've missed it but how is the bonus round scored? How much will it matter if we don't do them?

Eeeee...can't wait to get started!!

[heaven]

The 12 items listed can be used however you want. If you want to choose 2 events or 2 items, either is fine. 1 of each is also perfectly acceptable as long as the two combinations I mentioned are not used in the same chapter.

Also, the bonus round is 10 points. It will be added to your final score (for a complete total of 110 points). It is entirely optional. However, if a contestant does the bonus round each time, this will add up to a possible 50 extra points so it canbe substantial, depending on the execution. As for scoring, it will follow similar parameters as the main round. For example, Bonus Round #1 asks that you include a second excerpt. Your ten points will be assigned based on how it is used in your story in regards to creativity/flow/etc. Overall 10 points, based on judge's discretion of your use of the second excerpt.

CC usage has been amended in the main post.

[Elexis]

Can I be a judge in the Sim contest even if I haven't participated in a contest before?

[Shhh]

PMed you.

[ngluvjj]

can I be a judge? I participated in missroxor make me a model contest till the very end :D
story making is not really my thing^^;
but I love to read

[heaven]

Oh my goodness! I have so many people asking to judge! I'm really going to have to give some consideration to a lot of this queries. Keep a watch out for PMs from me if you've not already received them.

[missroxor]

story making is not really my thing^^
Aww, Hi ng. I thought you were really good at setting the scene in my contest, reckon you would be good at story telling :) ...and we do need more contestants! ;) lol

[Shhh]

@ ngluvjj: I followed the Make Me a Model Contest and I agree with missroxor. You are also a great Sim creater, so no worries there.

[heaven]

Alright everyone. Judging spots have been filled. So start thinking of stories and get your feet wet with story-telling! I look forward to seeing what everyone can come up with!

[haricots]

No paysites, means no Store content? OK...
Can you edit the list of events and objects required to be included in the stories? So I know clearly, which one is the events, and which one is the objects...
Can I use cheat/mod for the Meteor shower? Or twins? Or another things that is SO hard to do for me?
Thanks! ^_^

[heaven]

No paysites, means no Store content? OK...
Can you edit the list of events and objects required to be included in the stories? So I know clearly, which one is the events, and which one is the objects...
Can I use cheat/mod for the Meteor shower? Or twins? Or another things that is SO hard to do for me?
Thanks! ^_^

Note: Custom worlds, poses, and store content does not count as CC.
AMENDMENT to CC RULE: Skin/hair/eyes can be used without penalty but please be sure to let judges know that you used them. Other CC, including build/buy content or clothes/accessories will count towards the points.

Store Content is counted as official content, much the same as an SP or EP. So you may use it freely.

Also, as I responded to missroxor, you can choose any of the events/objects in any combination except for those listed. So 2 events, 2 objects, or 1 of each. You don't really need to know which is which, just as long as you use 2 different ones and do not repeat them in upcoming rounds. Cheats are perfectly acceptable; MOO, CFE, as well as mods such as AM and MC to create events.

[haricots]

Oh, that makes things a LOT easier. Hehehe :D thanks! I consider join this, but bcoz I will move to Singapore 3 weeks again, I don't sure I can play Sims for about 5 weeks there...

[heaven]

Well, if you can join, we'd love to have you. Either way, good luck with the move!

[haricots]

Well, if this contest is over, and you make another storytelling contest, I'd love to join that! ^_^

[heaven]

We shall see how this one goes first!

Also, I would like to welcome our judges: GigaRevival, angiebeno, and leesester, with the lovely Elexis helping out as an emergency judge.

[Shhh]

I'll join :D . EDIT:

We post in rounds, don't we?

[heaven]

I'll join :D . EDIT:

We post in rounds, don't we?

Yes, in rounds. The first round in the first chapter, the last round will be the conclusion. So, you should be able to take all the rounds and read them continuously at the end of the contest and have a comprehensive story.

[Shhh]

When we post round 2 do we post our entry for round 1 on it? (Thinking ahead :D )

[heaven]

When we post round 2 do we post our entry for round 1 on it? (Thinking ahead :D )

No. Just post each entry by itself. Once I get the first round in, I will make a list of contestants and will link to each of the rounds individually so someone, namely judges, can follow your progress. If you would like to put a link at the beginning of each round for your previous chapters, that is fine, but just a link please.

Also, anyone that is thinking of entering and may be done with the entry, please hold off on posting it. I am actually working on the list of events to make it 20 things instead of just 12. So this may give you some more ideas.

[GigaRevival]

Welcome everyone!

@heaven_sent_8_18: do we have a comprehensive list of contestants? And does it officially start this week, or are we still waiting on a few more? *attempts to contain excitement*

I can't wait to read everyone's awesome-sauce stories! ;) Good luck to those that are participating.

Edit: Ninja'd. :rofl: You already answered my question, so nevermind.

[Shhh]

I'm looking forward to seeing what else you can come up with so my story isn't to random :D .

[heaven]

Okay, the new items added to the list are below:

Dish best served cold
Chance meeting
Betrayal
Forbidden love
Hobo/homeless
Murder
Dog days
Financial Times

Also, birth of a child has been changed to new addition to family. It still cannot be used in conjunction with twins. Also, forbidden love and betrayal may not be used in the same chapter either.

Please remember that not all events/objects/themes have to be taken literally and at face value. It's about creativity as long as it is clear what two things you chose for each entry.

All of this has been added to the main post as well.

Thank you to all those who helped me with the updated list.

[Shhh]

Thanks :D , is this all? It isn't that there aren't enough, I'd just like to know :D .

[heaven]

That is all. I think 20 should be plenty as now you will only have to use half of the items instead of almost all of them.

[Shhh]

Yep, that is definately enough! Thanks, I'm goiung to go and get started!

[heaven]

After questions from some contestants, about the new things added to the list, I am clarifying. You MAY use more than 2 per chapter but 2 should stand out prominently as your chosen list items. Just make sure to have 2 CLEAR, PROMINENT items that are listed. Those are the ones you will be judged on. If a judge PMs me asking what 2 things to score you on, you WILL lose points.

[Shhh]

Is it ok if my theme is Fantasy and I use an Elf all the way through?

[heaven]

Is it ok if my theme is Fantasy and I use an Elf all the way through?

Yes. Main character can be whoever/whatever you want.

[Shhh]

Thanks (creating elf) :D .

[missroxor]

I could be wrong but just wanted to point out that if you use elf ears/wings or something that will probably count as CC wo you won't get the 5 point bonus for not using CC if she's in all of the rounds...I think that's how it works anyway :)

[Shhh]

Mmmmm. Suppose so. I'm not sure now :/ .

[heaven]

Missroxor is right. If you use CC (other than what is stated as allowed), you will be docked the 5 points. It IS only 5 points and, once you use it each round, at that point, it doesn't matter HOW much you use. You just have to decide if it's worth the 5 points. That does not include pay content though: pay content CC would fall under the rules category so you would be docked additional points there if you use donation only items, aka not following MTS free content only policy.

[vhanster]

A story contest is interesting, and if my Sims 3 could start working properly, I might join.

By the way, do you have a template/layout for the entries? And are there any theme(s) for the stories?

[ngluvjj]

@missroxor : :p I'm not that good at creating an original stories, if it's creating an imaginary sequel or fanfiction, I can :D

@shhh : :D thanks for the compliment^^

@heaven_sent_8_18 : sorry for replying your PM late, I've been so busy for a few days, so I stayed away from my notebook :p

I'll be spying this thread for sure! XD

[heaven]

A story contest is interesting, and if my Sims 3 could start working properly, I might join.

By the way, do you have a template/layout for the entries? And are there any theme(s) for the stories?

You can choose whatever theme or genre that you want. By template, do you mean, how I want the entries posted? If so, not particularly. Just think of it like a story with paragraphs and such. If you want to see how some other story writers set up the format, you can look at some story/legacy blogs. Angiebeno and I both have one; you find find them here: Benno's World (http://angiebenno.blogspot.com/) and Heaven's Legacies (http://heavenslegacies.blogspot.com/).

I hope you get your game working! We would love to have you.

[GijinkaGlaceon]

Sounds really interesting haha... just have a question though (sorry if it's been stated already), but basically we format it like a legacy? And then we can choose whatever genre and plot we want as long as each chapter incorporates those two elements? And there's no restrictions on how you make your main character?

[heaven]

Sounds really interesting haha... just have a question though (sorry if it's been stated already), but basically we format it like a legacy? And then we can choose whatever genre and plot we want as long as each chapter incorporates those two elements? And there's no restrictions on how you make your main character?

It doesn't HAVE to be formatted exactly like a legacy. Those are just examples on how to show the pictures with the paragraphs. It IS a story though so there should be paragraphs and some form of transition between chapters/rounds so that, at the end, there is a story that can be read all the way through.

You can choose whatever genre, plot, theme, etc that you want and go wherever you want with it as long as you have those 2 events/objects/themes AND follow the round explanation. Don't forget that there is also a quote that should be incorporated into this round somehow.

Characters can be whoever/whatever you want. You have complete creative control freedom as long as it follows the main rules regarding CC and that it is your own character.

[Shhh]

:alarm: My Chapter 1: :alarm:

http://img214.imageshack.us/img214/3954/screenshot69b.jpg (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/214/screenshot69b.jpg/)

My body shook as I walked through the door into my parent's silent, rotting, filthy house. Something had happend. It was true. My dear mother's body was lying, curled up on the grate.
'Mother?' I whispered, fearing the worst. No reply came. I looked beside her to see a second body. Father. The Humans had killed them, I was sure. Why had the Humans done this to us? We were poor, but we hadn't done any harm. Elves had been living in peace with Humans for years. It had to have been them. It looked like Dad had been right. The Humans had never liked us. I looked at the bodies not only had my parents been killed, but I was homeless. The house didn't belong to me and would be given to a new family as soon as the bodies were removed.

http://img835.imageshack.us/img835/1138/screenshot662.jpg (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/835/screenshot662.jpg/)

It was a real shock to me that they had been killed. They were the last people on this planet that I thought this would happen to. At first I didn't cry as it took me a while to realise they were gone, forever. I would never hear my father's soft, yet stern voice or my mother's open arms. My father and mother would never smile and celebrate when I got promoted or made an achivement. Then I began to cry. The warm, salty tears poured down my cheeks, I couldn't stop them. By breathing became load and coarse. My eyes were swollen and my lungs began to hurt. I couldn't stand these thoughts. The thought of never seeing them again.

http://img267.imageshack.us/img267/7598/screenshot632.jpg (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/267/screenshot632.jpg/)

I knew father would have died trying to protect mother. He had always hated violence and death. It was times like these when I thought my father, who hated guns and had never been to any wars, was the bravest man who ever lived. I wasn't brave at all. Mother and father wouldn't want me to spend my life mourning after them so I didn't. Instead I tried to find out who killed them and why. Although I am tired and it is hard to think, I want to keep trying. I want to know what happened. Maybe the killer was after me? Maybe they had wanted money my family didn't have. I f I had one wish, I would wish to know why they were killed.

http://img687.imageshack.us/img687/7813/screenshot702m.jpg (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/687/screenshot702m.jpg/)

I know that nobody would kill my family for the cottage. In fact, it wasn't even classed as a cottage. It had a huge, ugly on the right side of the room, and dustbins had to be kept indoors. It was an ugly house, and I'm sure no one would want it. I kept wondering why anyone would kill my parents. They were popular, kind and good neighbours. They certainly weren't rich. They didn't make a fuss of anything and never made fun of other people's beliefs and religions. As I lay on the bench I felt my eyelids begining to droop. When I awoke, I woke up on a different bench in an alley way, homeless.

http://img713.imageshack.us/img713/3311/screenshot613.jpg (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/713/screenshot613.jpg/)

I keep getting splinters all over my sore, bent back. Whenever I sleep, I think of mother and father, cut off staring into blackness, just not there. I keep thinking that it can't be true, that you can't NOT be there. I wished I belived in souls and spirts, Heaven and Hell. I don't think the bench helps with these nightmares of nothingness. I hope I can save up enough money to buy a bed. The only thing to eat is slimy, cheap pizza, and to drink, muddy water. Why couldn't my parents have written a will? Did they not care what would happen to me? I wish I would stop thinking like this. They brought me up, helped me, fed me and yet left me homeless. It doesn't make sense to me.

http://img802.imageshack.us/img802/643/screenshot633.jpg (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/802/screenshot633.jpg/)

I am scanning the newspapers, trying to find the funeral date. I've found out alot more Elves die than Humans. I wonder who else has noticed. I really think it was a Human. When I find out who killed them, I will kill them, slowly and painfully, though it is not in an Elf's nature to do so. I feel it is the least I can do seeing as I can't chip in with the neighbours for my parent's funeral. I hope I can make it to the funeral. I feel really bad, they were my parents but I can't even chip in for a funeral. I feel I am very selfish person.

http://img571.imageshack.us/img571/3268/screenshot64i.jpg (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/571/screenshot64i.jpg/)



:alarm: Is this enough? Or shall I try to write more? :alarm: It is alot harder than it looks. :D So I'm not sure if I'm finished.

CC Was used (Elf ears, hair and eye contacts) : Hobo and Murder. :!:

[GigaRevival]

You need to list hair, skin, and eye CC as well... even though there will be no point reduction (unless they are pay items, I believe).
"Skin/hair/eyes can be used without penalty but please be sure to let judges know that you used them."

I also don't see a word minimum/maximum for the introduction set in the rules; so your length might be okay. : )

Edit: And thank you for listing the two subjects you included and underlining the quote, it really helped out as I'm still trying to familiarize myself with all the potential subjects. Saved me having to switch between the two pages. ;) I'll get better at this, I promise.

[Shhh]

Your welcome. I'm still editing it :D .

[heaven]

There is a maximum, but no minimum for words although there is a picture amount needed. Just check the first page again, under round 1 for details. I am really excited to have our first entry! You can edit as much as you want between now and the deadline. Just let us know when it is finished for sure.

[Shhh]

Ok, glad I can keep edititing. What happens if no one else joins?

[vhanster]

Alright, my game is working, but it's really slow, and I'm not sure if that's fast enough to take pictures with.

Anyway, the point-of-view of the story does NOT have to be in first person, does it?

[heaven]

Ok, glad I can keep edititing. What happens if no one else joins?

Then I extend the deadline and hope for a few more applicants. But, no! Don't think like that. I -think- I have 3 more entrants who are just working on their stories now. So 6 more!

Alright, my game is working, but it's really slow, and I'm not sure if that's fast enough to take pictures with.

Anyway, the point-of-view of the story does NOT have to be in first person, does it?

That is your choice. Just be consistent. :)
Also, I typically just pause for a shot I want then rotate the camera and set it up that way. My hands/brain aren't fast enough to snap the pictures I want, forget the computer! :rofl:

[heaven]

Good news everyone, especially all your Sims 2 Players. We have been given permission to extend this contest to Sims 2 as well, with the help of leesester and permission from the great HP herself. So, for all you players and story tellers out there in TS2 that were bummed because you couldn't participate; you can now! The rules, including those related to CC have been amended for this (although those from TS3, nothing has changed for you). I am excited to welcome any of you on board!

Also, and this is good news for EVERYONE: because we have added a completely new set of contestants, hopefully, the Round 1 will end in 10 days instead of 3. This should give all those people who didn't know they were eligible a chance to prepare and get everything set up. And for those of you already working on your contest, reprieve!

Countdown (http://www.timeanddate.com/counters/customcounter.html?msg=Story+Time+Contest%3A+Round+1+Deadline&month=10&day=22&year=2011&hour=06&min=59&sec=59&p0=770)

[LadyAwesome]

I love how the count down finishes at 6 am for me lol

[heaven]

That's quite strange. It finishes at 7am for me and I KNOW you are not only an hour away missy! :P

[Shhh]

Hopefully we will get more contestants :) .

[ReyaD]

Okaaaay lets try this out! My first contest so I'm a little freaked out but I've been doing Sims storytelling for a while now. It'll be fun reading everyone's stories and I hope we get enough people to join for the rounds to be continued.

EDIT: And for some reason I am having trouble sizing my photos... I haven't used photobucket in years and I have no idea what I'm doing. Help? Please?

Anyway, without further ado...

Promised - Round One

http://i1083.photobucket.com/albums/j386/Rey4rey4/Screenshot-1736.jpg

Fresh out of high school and my life was already over. No I’m not being dramatic (that’s my sister’s trait, not mine) just telling the truth. Ever since my twin sister and I were born with matching vampiric birthmarks my future had been planned out. Promised to the king’s youngest son as soon as I was of age... and guess what. I just reached “of age”.

http://i1083.photobucket.com/albums/j386/Rey4rey4/Screenshot-1737.jpg


There were times when I wished my twin sister Janice had been picked instead of me, but I always tried to ignore those thoughts as soon I realized they were there. She was lucky that her birthmark had faded when she was still just a baby. Not that she ever had any trouble with the boys anyway. She was nerdy, she was awkward, but she always got the boys she wanted. It was crazy! And by watching her, I began to think there was some skill involved in being a girl. A skill I had never myself mastered or even discovered.

http://i1083.photobucket.com/albums/j386/Rey4rey4/Screenshot-1742.jpg

My father was just as skilled, but in a different sense. He was the best mixologist in town. So much so that despite owning the ugliest tavern in town we were always busy... when we were open. Which we weren’t today. To my surprise he motioned me over to the bar, pouring me a drink before returning to his chores.

“Daddy?”

“Liquid courage.” He muttered. “You’ll need it today. Without a doubt Mister Stone will be on his way to see you soon.”

http://i1083.photobucket.com/albums/j386/Rey4rey4/Screenshot-1748.jpg

“Actually I’m already here.”

Daddy jumped back in shock, almost falling as the young vampire materialized on the stool next to me, book still in hand. I just fought back a giggle. Tyler Stone, my promised husband, the youngest child (out of around 12 boys and 6 girls) of the head vampire in town. We’d been born only days apart, with him being older then me. Naturally no one had told us of our upcoming marriage until we were teenagers, and he’d taken it far better then I.

http://i1083.photobucket.com/albums/j386/Rey4rey4/Screenshot-1756.jpg

He had me in his arms before I realized what was happening.

“You look lovely today, Jessie. You grew up well.”

A light blush colored my cheeks as I smiled. “As did you.” And it was true. I hadn’t seen his since we were both teens, and back then he had been as awkward and dorky as my twin sister. Now... well maybe this marriage business wouldn’t be so bad.

http://i1083.photobucket.com/albums/j386/Rey4rey4/Screenshot-1760.jpg

“I’m feeling a bit... peckish, love. Would you mind if I took a sip?”

Thats the line that always brought me back to reality. Even if I fell for Tyler, there was no way he was in love with me. I was just meant to be his first wife of dozens. A tool to feed from and give him children. I couldn’t say no but he still waited for my nod of acceptance before feeding.

I didn’t have to look to feel my father’s disapproving gaze. Not did I have long to wait before hearing his voice. “Mister Stone, I would appreciate it if you held off from... that until you are both married and behind closed doors.

http://i1083.photobucket.com/albums/j386/Rey4rey4/Screenshot-1766.jpg

Tyler took a step away from me, smiling at my father in an almost patronizing way. “Of course, Mr. Jacobs. Whatever my future father-in-law wishes.”

I’d known Tyler long enough to see the slight tremble in his arm. He was angry, but he wouldn’t dare attack my father while promised to me. My father knew this, but his words were still foolish. Any of Tyler’s brothers could attack him in his stead. It was times like these when I thought my father, who hated guns and had never been to any wars, was the bravest man who ever lived. I’d never have his courage.

http://i1083.photobucket.com/albums/j386/Rey4rey4/Screenshot-1770.jpg

But I didn’t need courage to take the heat off my father. Taking Tyler’s hands in mine I drew his attention back to me. “Come on, Ty. Let loose a little. It’s my birthday! Lets go out for dinner or do something romantic. I want to go on at least one real date before we get married.”

He smiled at me, the anger in his eyes completely gone. “I’m afraid we may not have time for dating. Father wants us married soon. He insists I don’t return home with the ring still in my pocket.”

“The... ring?”

http://i1083.photobucket.com/albums/j386/Rey4rey4/Screenshot-1786.jpg

He got down on one knee then and there, my heart almost leaping up into my throat when he pulled out the ring.

“Jessie Jacobs, will you do me the honour of marrying me?”

It took only a few seconds for me to realize the sick feeling in my stomach was from fear, but happiness. A few more seconds to realize the tone in his voice. It wasn’t a command. It was a question. I could say no.

“Jessie?”

http://i1083.photobucket.com/albums/j386/Rey4rey4/Screenshot-1787.jpg

His voice shocked me back to reality. Unable to hide my smile for even a second longer I put my hands on the ring box and slowly shut it. “No Tyler... I can’t. At least not yet. Please understand, it isn’t you. I’m just... too young for this shit.”

“Jessie, I’m not much older. This is the way things are done in this town! If you won’t marry me I can’t guarantee your family will stay safe.”

I wasn’t listening to him. Not really. “Tyler I’m not saying no for good. Just for now. Please understand that I just need to live first.”

---

CC used: NONE. I realize now that there might be CC out there that gives non-vampires the "bite" mark but I'm not using it. I just used the clone of a vampire character for Jessie in order for the mark to stay. I think that's okay in the rules, right?

[Myshia]

heaven_sent_8_18, i was wondering if we have to use screenshots. Right now i have limited time to actually touch my PC and my game needs to again be uninstalled and reinstalled. This is only for the application round though.. thanks for answering :)

[LadyAwesome]

Whooooohooooooo, Go Reya :D

[Tamlyn]

This is tempting, even though I know I don't have time - I looked though, and now I have ideas about how to use the excerpt running through my head. I might have to make time :)

I just had a couple of questions. First - when is Round 1 due? Some people have mentioned a countdown. I might be slow, but I can't see a countdown! Are we allowed to cross genre (ie fantasy/romance)? Can we use addition to family/twins in the same chapter provided they aren't related? (or can we use twins anyway, even if we choose two others?)

I'm already making plans on Sims and downloading pose things (because I don't normally do this, I don't have anything for photo set ups).

[heaven]

ReyaD - lovely to have you! Welcome. :) Also, regarding your photos, I use modyourpanties. It's specifically for hosting pictures on MTS; you just have to have an account, which you obviously do. Much simpler in my opinion.

heaven_sent_8_18, i was wondering if we have to use screenshots. Right now i have limited time to actually touch my PC and my game needs to again be uninstalled and reinstalled. This is only for the application round though.. thanks for answering :)

Screenshots are required. However, you CAN still enter the application round without them. You would be docked points, but there would still be 4 rounds to go (plus there are the bonuses for each round). It's up to you whether to risk it.

This is tempting, even though I know I don't have time - I looked though, and now I have ideas about how to use the excerpt running through my head. I might have to make time :)

I just had a couple of questions. First - when is Round 1 due? Some people have mentioned a countdown. I might be slow, but I can't see a countdown! Are we allowed to cross genre (ie fantasy/romance)? Can we use addition to family/twins in the same chapter provided they aren't related? (or can we use twins anyway, even if we choose two others?)

I'm already making plans on Sims and downloading pose things (because I don't normally do this, I don't have anything for photo set ups).

Round 1 is due on October 22 at 7am, PST. The countdown is located on both the first post (right under the Round 1 Picture) and somewhere on the second page when I noted that I had extended this round. It blends in so hopefully my "directions" are helpful. :lol:

Crossing genres is perfectly fine. In no way am I an English teacher or publisher/editor, etc. Make it your own! Just be creative and make it interesting. If twins and new addition to the family are your only choices, whether they are related are not, they would count as the "don't mix". You can choose more than 2 of the items from the list as long as the 2 are obvious as your choices with the third being a backseat passenger. However, I would suggest that even if you chose 3, with 2 of those being twins and the addition, it would be risky. Maybe save one or the other for a later chapter?

[ReyaD]

ReyaD - lovely to have you! Welcome. Also, regarding your photos, I use modyourpanties. It's specifically for hosting pictures on MTS; you just have to have an account, which you obviously do. Much simpler in my opinion.

On my screen my photos are now resized according to the page, but I'll keep that in mind for the next round. Thank you!

[LadyAwesome]

So who else is joining this contest? I am working on something. I doubt it will come to anything, but we do what we can. yeah?

[Shhh]

I hope more people join =s. I really want to see what they can come up with :)

[ReyaD]

Same here, Shhh. This is a fun contest and my first! I want more people to join so we can have a real competition. By the way, I love your main character. She's so lovely!

(Awesome. You'd better join. I've got my eye on you.)

[vhanster]

Another question: is photoshopping allowed? And why aren't pay contents not allowed? It's not like we're sharing those stuffs....

Well, sorry if I'm asking too much when I'm not certain that I will join, but I need to know some of these before deciding.

[heaven]

Another question: is photoshopping allowed? And why aren't pay contents not allowed? It's not like we're sharing those stuffs....

Well, sorry if I'm asking too much when I'm not certain that I will join, but I need to know some of these before deciding.

As stated in the main rules, photoshopping is NOT allowed. A border is fine if you feel you must have one but that is it.

As for pay content, this contest is hosted on MTS which has a long standing rule that what you see is what you get. Whether or not you are sharing, if you post a picture with content in it and someone loves it and asks where you got it, they should be able to go download it, without a charge. This is a MTS policy.

[vhanster]

Eheh, but most paysite content can be downloaded from PSMD right?

[heaven]

Eheh, but most paysite content can be downloaded from PSMD right?

Specific Guidelines from MTS:

"MTS has long had policies that restrict users from promoting pay content in their uploads - either by requiring that content, or by showing it in screenshots.
The purpose of this policy is to promote the use of free content, as we believe that the community benefits from all items being free to download and use without requiring anyone to pay for it - whether that be paying for individual items, or by subscription. We would like all items uploaded to or shown on MTS to be "what you see is what you get" or "what you see is what you CAN get, without having to pay for it.

Content NOT Allowed
Any content that is available from its creator for pay, donation, etc. You may not picture pay items in screenshots or upload items that require pay items. Items uploaded on places like the PMBD Booty (or other sites sharing pay content for free) are not considered free content since they were originally pay - just because you CAN get them for free doesn't make them free content."

Personally, even though I know this is not an upload, by using pay content, no matter where you got it, you are promoting the use of pay content which is in opposition of MTS policies.

[armiel]

MTS is a site for free quality content. Pay content is not allowed in uploads or pictures. No matter whether you would acquire it for free.

[Elexis]

Also, using pay content in your pictures is sort of "free advertising" for pay creators. There's no use to do so, because there's plenty of beautiful free CC around, so it's better to use free content and give that advertising to the free creators.

[whiterider]

Also, you can get plutonium for free if you steal from the right person, but that doesn't make it a good idea, does it? :giggler:

[Shhh]

@ ReyaD thanks, I wasn't sure anyone would like her :D .

@ Everyone Please join, I spend time working out my, rather random, story. :D .

[heaven]

Shh, with the new deadline there is still just over a week to get things in so no need to worry yet. I believe I know of, at least, 2 other people joining. Possibly 4. So that would get us over halfway there. :)

[Shhh]

^ That's good :)

[LadyAwesome]

I will probably leave it to the last minute and ask for an extension

[waterjay]

Guys, I wanna join. Just some questions though: In case of not respecting the deadline, do we get disqualified? and, I saw that some of the applicants did not meet the 100 words per paragraph requirement... can I do that too? Thanks in advance :)

[heaven]

Guys, I wanna join. Just some questions though: In case of not respecting the deadline, do we get disqualified? and, I saw that some of the applicants did not meet the 100 words per paragraph requirement... can I do that too? Thanks in advance :)

It's approximately 100 words per paragraph. If you want to do less, that's fine, as long as you have the picture requirements. However, you can't go OVER that amount. Also, it doesn't have to be broken up like that either. If you want 150 on one and 50 on the other, go for it. It just should be spaced with pictures and words rather than having everything in the story clumped together and then plopping the photos down.

Also, if you don't meet the deadline, you won't get scores for that round but you will be able to continue in subsequent rounds. I don't recommend this if you can avoid it because part of your score is on flow. If you miss a chapter, it might throw things off. :lol:

I really hope you have the opportunity to join! You would be most welcome.

[waterjay]

@ heaven, I decided I'd join :) and I'm currently writing chapter 1 :) I might not be an expert but it sounds interesting... and I think i can make my chapters in weekends, sooo...

[missroxor]

It's approximately 100 words per paragraph. If you want to do less, that's fine, as long as you have the picture requirements. However, you can't go OVER that amount. Also, it doesn't have to be broken up like that either. If you want 150 on one and 50 on the other, go for it. It just should be spaced with pictures and words rather than having everything in the story clumped together and then plopping the photos down.
So it's not so much about getting close to 100 words per para but more so that we don't exceed 1000 words per round? Pressumably we will be penalised points from the "rules" category if we go over but is there a system in place (like -5 for every 100 extra words) or is it solely down to the discretion of the individual judges? I don't plan to break the rules but I'm just not very good at wrapping things up quickly, lol.

I'm still working on mine but last night decided to go in a bit of a different dirrection so I've done a big re-write. Now I'm panicking about whether I can make it all make sense O.O ugh, writing is soooo much harder than I thought it'd be :(

One more question ;) you say we can add borders. I'm assuming you meant like a simple black line but I wanted to clarify if I could do a different type border. Something like instead of a solid line, I fade the edges into nothing...I want use it to show memories/flashbacks. I can knock up a quick example if you're not sure.

[heaven]

So it's not so much about getting close to 100 words per para but more so that we don't exceed 1000 words per round? Pressumably we will be penalised points from the "rules" category if we go over but is there a system in place (like -5 for every 100 extra words) or is it solely down to the discretion of the individual judges? I don't plan to break the rules but I'm just not very good at wrapping things up quickly, lol.

I'm still working on mine but last night decided to go in a bit of a different dirrection so I've done a big re-write. Now I'm panicking about whether I can make it all make sense O.O ugh, writing is soooo much harder than I thought it'd be :(

One more question ;) you say we can add borders. I'm assuming you meant like a simple black line but I wanted to clarify if I could do a different type border. Something like instead of a solid line, I fade the edges into nothing...I want use it to show memories/flashbacks. I can knock up a quick example if you're not sure.

This is what happens when chat is down. :lol:

In regards to word count: this round is approximately 100 words per picture. So, yes, don't go over 1,000 words! I hadn't given any particular thought to how exactly you would be penalized for going over. Rules only count for 5 points so at most, you might lose ALL of them, but I doubt it. I'll leave it up to each judge on how exactly to be penalize you for going over that max.

Also, for borders. You can add a plain border, a frame border, or you can round the edges to look like a photo. I'm not sure exactly what you mean by fading into nothing (I think I can picture it) but just to be sure, posting an example would be great.

If you mean a fuzzy border like below, that's fine. Just use your discretion on how much to take away/how jagged it is and make sure you're not blurring the pictures or changing the colors; no sepias, black and whites, etc.

http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30788_111016140013Border.jpg

[waterjay]

One more question :P Is it possible to turn the excerpt? like for example: "By watching her, I thought..." and turn it to "By watching her, she thought..." ?? :)

[heaven]

Excerpts should be used just as they are written. How you use it is up to you though.

[missroxor]

That's pretty much what I had in mind though my fade distance might be a tad bigger and I might possibly round the corners....all assuming ofc that I can figure out how to do it nicely in PS :p

[Shhh]

I'm so glad you two are joining :D I bet your stories will be great.

[missroxor]

gah, doubt it. Last night I wrote the firt 6 paragraphs and I just did a word count and have nearly 900...with 4 paragraphs left to go D: ...I'm thinking maybe my story is too complicated and not really suited to a short story format :/ Might try re-writing a new story from scratch.

[Shhh]

I only have 6 or 7 paragrraphs :D .

[waterjay]

I have 10 paragraphs but It's the first time I do this :) So I think it'll be crap, but you know it's always good to give it a try! :)

[GigaRevival]

Aw... don't get down on yourself waterjay. I'm sure what you write will be great! I'm looking forward to reading/judging it.

[waterjay]

Chapter 1: New Born, New Troubles.

http://i1221.photobucket.com/albums/dd465/waterjay/Screenshot-153.jpg
Achille landed home with a pale face that showed sorrow, pain and fear. Concerned by his aspect, Marysa asked: “What’s wrong? I’ve never seen you like this before…”. Due to his trembling, he could not take a word out of his mouth. Marysa, who hates to repeat herself, asked again: “Achille, tell me what’s wrong!”
“He… he… he’s born!!” Achille replied with difficulty. After that sentence was said, a sinister silence dropped in the room. They both looked at each other, realizing that what they thought they have gotten rid of, came back to haunt them.


http://i1221.photobucket.com/albums/dd465/waterjay/Screenshot-154.jpg
“ I’m not feeling very well….”, and she sat down after whispering those words. “I had the same reaction as yours” declared Achille. He proceeded, “ We have to do something, and quick. If we reconstruct the Order, we could…”
“ The Order is dead.”, she interrupted.
“What do you mean?!”
“You know what I mean. Deena’s gone. She was the Order itself. THE ORDER IS DEAD” and she walked away refraining her tears from sliding down her cheeks.
“ Marysa! You’re a witch, a paranormal character, you BELONG to that Order, I DON’T! The world depends on you and on your similars! You….”

http://i1221.photobucket.com/albums/dd465/waterjay/Screenshot-155.jpg
“SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UUUUPPPP!!!” she screamed loudly. “Don’t talk to me about this! DON’T! Go get the Order yourself!! I’m by no means responsible of this damn world!!”
“….It was times like these when I thought my father, who hated guns and had never been to any wars, was the bravest man who ever lived. He was a normal mortal. You are a witch, and you can’t even reach half of his courage. Bye Marysa.” , so he shut the door behind his back and walked away frowning.
“ No wait! I’m sorry Achille…!!” But it was too late, as Achille had already crossed the street.


http://i1221.photobucket.com/albums/dd465/waterjay/Screenshot-156.jpg
“I’m stupid. I must fix what I’ve just done… I’m invoking Authentica…” Marysa said to herself. She immediately headed to the basement, placed the candles in a circle shape and started chanting:
“Mother of time and space,
Show yourself to me,
Right now, right in this place,
I really need you desperately,
Bring me with you some grace,
As the child came to birth suddenly.”
And Authentica appeared before her, with a serious, worried look.


http://i1221.photobucket.com/albums/dd465/waterjay/Screenshot-157.jpg
“I was waiting for your call Marysa. The Emperor of Evil has come to light. Even though I wield the power of time and space, I cannot return to the past to the moment of his birth. It was meant to happen, and I can only modify what WASN’T meant to happen. You have to fight dear.”
“What should I do?” cried Marysa. “ I feel guilty about everything! And if you can’t bring us back in time, we’re done! I really want you to help me Mother Authentica… I beg you!”
“I’ll take you back to where you fought with Achille. Try to find a more suitable answer this time….”
As Marysa heard those words, she found herself standing in front of Achille.


http://i1221.photobucket.com/albums/dd465/waterjay/Screenshot-158.jpg

………


“ Marysa! You’re a witch, a paranormal character, you BELONG to that Order, I DON’T! The world depends on you and on your similars! You….”
“Achille, let’s get down to work…”
“Huh? Wait weren’t you just saying the Order is dead and kept discouraging yourself?”, He questioned her.
“Forget about that. The Order is still dead. We are reforming a new one. Let’s get down to work.”
“You’re weird and unpredictable Marysa!”
“I’m a witch Achille. Now enough about this subject, call Dan and tell him to meet us at the coffee shop.”


http://i1221.photobucket.com/albums/dd465/waterjay/Screenshot-159.jpg
Few minutes later, Dan, Marysa and Achille met at the café. Dan, keeping his eye on his watch asked: “so what is it you guys want to tell me?”
Marysa replied “ He’s born. We are forming a new Order before any damage is inflicted.”
“HE IS BORN?!” Dan shouted with surprise. “Oh there’s nothing I can do, I’ve lost my powers and…”
“Dan!” interrupted Achille. “I’d be really thankful if you’d just stopped lying for once. Everyone in this world is in danger, your kids included. You know you don’t want anything bad happen to them…”



http://i1221.photobucket.com/albums/dd465/waterjay/Screenshot-160-1.jpg
“I’m sorry guys. I just don’t want to go through all I went last year. I have to go, need to pick up the kids from school. Marysa, Achille, goodbye.” And Dan left, leaving the witch and the mortal alone.
“ This isn’t good. I’m not going to do everything by myself… We lost Dan, the calamity power… who else could we ask to join us?” asked Marysa.
“How about Layla, the fire controller?”
“She’ll do the same. They were all close to death last year. And they weren’t even members of the Order…”
“You’re a witch. Use your powers and scry for people who own the same abilities as you…”
This said, they both headed back home with large disappointment…



http://i1221.photobucket.com/albums/dd465/waterjay/Screenshot-161.jpg
After uncountable and unsuccessful tentatives, Marysa gave up. “Achille, I’m desperate. I can’t find anyone; no one is answering my telepathic calls. I’m done.” And she sat at the corner of her room, her head on her knees, her tears raining over the carpet. Achille didn’t say a word. He left the poor girl fade in the obscure shadows of the room’s corner.


http://i1221.photobucket.com/albums/dd465/waterjay/Screenshot-162.jpg
Seeing Marysa’s state, Achille decided he would help her. He secretly went to see Layla, whose reaction of shock was expected. “I need the old Marysa back.” , decalred Achille. “ By watching her, I began to think there was some skill involved in being a girl, or better said, a witch. You own supernatural powers, and your lives aren’t easy at all, I understand that. But please Layla, help us take out the new born, and most importantly, help ME get back the cheerful Marysa I know… Please Layla, please…”
Layla didn’t let a single word out of her mouth. She simply nodded, confirming she would offer her help, despite her excessively jealous character…

___________________________________________________________________________
CC used: Eyes (DEFAULT REPLACEMENT) Hair, Skin (DEFAULT)
Events: Emperor of Evil, Paranormal Character

[LadyAwesome]

I am so glad I didn't offer to judge this lol

[ReyaD]

So in other words you need to join this, Awesome. : P (Seriously. Please?)

[GigaRevival]

We do need more contestants LA... I'll give you a pseudo-cookie if you join. An invisible internet confection of deliciousness. Enticing, yes? ;)
Or if that doesn't work, I double dog dare you to join. Now you *have* to do it! DO IT DO IT DO IT. :jest:

[waterjay]

@ Giga I just read your comment, and all I can say is thank you for encouraging me in writing :) But when I reread this story I think "omg did I write that crap!?" lol guess I'll make it just for fun cuz i cant compete against you guys :) Good luck! (I'm still in btw :P)

[GigaRevival]

^^You're welcome. That's what I'm here for... sort of. ;)

Glad to see that you're accepting and remaining in the Challenge. All I can say is, I hope all the contestants follow the rule of Highlander: "there only can be one!" (http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=%20%22there%20can%20only%20be%20one%22) Get it? One winner? I'm clever :rolleyes:

Good luck.

[leesester]

@ Giga I just read your comment, and all I can say is thank you for encouraging me in writing :) But when I reread this story I think "omg did I write that crap!?" lol guess I'll make it just for fun cuz i cant compete against you guys :) Good luck! (I'm still in btw :P)

Well, I thought your pics were really good - great posing, I could see a story going on IN THE PICTURES so worry not, but yea, the real point is to have fun.

[waterjay]

Well, I thought your pics were really good - great posing, I could see a story going on IN THE PICTURES so worry not, but yea, the real point is to have fun.
Thank you :) I really apreciate what you wrote :) If I got this right, the pictures are good, but I have to focus a bit more on the plot right? :D

[leesester]

Um, I dunno if I am supposed to say - as it will be like helping the next contestants cos they will think - aha - fish looks for this and that and not do things - which puts you at a disadvantage - which is not fair. I guess really I should not have commented on the pictures either .................... and now Heaven is gonna kick my ass :(

[waterjay]

Um, I dunno if I am supposed to say - as it will be like helping the next contestants cos they will think - aha - fish looks for this and that and not do things - which puts you at a disadvantage - which is not fair. I guess really I should not have commented on the pictures either .................... and now Heaven is gonna kick my ass :(

I'm sorry I dragged you into this. I'm really sorry, I dunno how I can apologize. you're absolutely right, my bad I forgot we're in a contest. Sorry again! :S

[leesester]

/lee hugs waterjay (and uses him?her? as a human shield against the wrath of Heaven)

Nah, is ok. No need to be sorry. Heaven will forgive me. Eventually.

[heaven]

heaven is going to ignore and just enjoy the spirit of friendliness and encouragement we've got going on so far.

Really nice pictures doesn't say anything about anything else. :P And this really is for fun so just enjoy! Everyone may get some feedback from the judges after this round is over so, hopefully, it will help you improve each chapter!

[waterjay]

Ookayz :P lol @lee I'm a boy :P
@ Heaven Hope we get more applicants so that it will become more interesting xD I sooo got into this! I hope we can proceed!

[Elexis]

This is soo fun, I even want to join now!
Heaven, should I stay as an emergency judge or it would be better if I join? :giggler:

[leesester]

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

You are my backup for when I pluck up courage to tell heaven I wanna play too and not be judge.........

[Elexis]

Oh well, I will need to wait for another contest then :anime:

[blackivy]

http://i53.tinypic.com/2a96urt.jpg
I can at times recall a distant event from when I was younger. The sight of my mother hanging up the phone still sometimes flashes before my eyes. My father passed away that day from an illness he had been fighting even since before I was born. It was times like these when I thought my father, who hated guns and had never been to any wars, was the bravest man who ever lived.
http://i54.tinypic.com/29vgps5.jpg
And here is my mother now, marrying another man, some fellow named Jack. I never liked Jack but she seemed to adore him from the start. She met him at work and he has been wooing her for a year now. In all honesty, I felt like her marrying Jack was an act of betrayal.
http://i51.tinypic.com/mli0y9.jpg
When they shared their first marital kiss it was as if my deceased father was erased from my mother’s life. I feared the moment when even I wouldn’t be able to remember his voice anymore and with Jack now a constant part of our family that moment was bound to happen even sooner. Scared, I chose not to attend the celebration that followed the ceremony and locked myself in my room.
http://i51.tinypic.com/eznwr5.jpg
My room was my haven, my little pink place of paradise. I could sit there all by myself, playing with my toys and go to imaginary worlds entirely my own and make up the craziest stories. At times I would play house with my dolls and pretend that my little family was as it has been before. Happy and Jack-free.
http://i55.tinypic.com/27wygl5.jpg
A couple of months of my mother’s blissful new marriage went by and the day my life went upside down again arrived. She knocked on my door and interrupted my reading.
“I have something serious to discuss with you” she said and pointed to my book, silently ordering me to put it down. I obeyed and curiously glanced at her as she sat on the couch next to me.
http://i52.tinypic.com/e04wzq.jpg
“What is it?” I asked.
“Your fath…Jack and I are in love, you know that, right?” she asked cautiously. I didn’t reply. “And, well, when two people are in love, like your father and I were, wonderful things can happen. Emma, you’re going to get a little brother or sister!” she announced with a huge smile on her face.
I froze.
http://i54.tinypic.com/kf59vk.jpg
“But I don’t want a brother or a sister!” I shouted.
“Well, honey”, she tried to reason with me, “This isn’t for you to decide. Jack and I have talked about it a lot and we believe that it’s time to have a baby. We won’t love you any less, I hope you know that.”
“He doesn’t love me! You don’t love me either!” I started crying. I could see that my attitude was breaking her heart but her having a child with Jack just felt like another act of betrayal
http://i51.tinypic.com/r0tdl2.jpg
“I’m sorry that this is how you feel” she said and I could hear her voice breaking. “I will always love you, you remember that, no matter how many children I have.”
After this, she got up and walked out of my room silently, closing the doors behind her. Feelings of both victory and abandonment flooded me. What would my father say? Will I be forgotten after all?
http://i51.tinypic.com/289fxmq.jpg
Days, weeks, months passed and no one seemed to care that I was moping. My attitude changed no one’s mind and my mother’s belly grew bigger and bigger. Jack was thrilled. He decorated the nursery, arranged a baby shower, and often discussed baby names with anyone who would listen. With all this baby work I felt more ignored than ever since my mother gave up on trying to cheer me up and convince me that her having this baby is a good thing.
http://i55.tinypic.com/a581sx.jpg
Right after the beginning of summer, Mary was born. The house was hectic. Friends and relatives often visited just to have a look at this bundle of joy. I refused to go near Mary and often was forbidden to touch her by older relatives because I carried “germs”. I sometimes observed my mother when she took care of Mary. She handled her with such love and by watching her, I began to think there was some skill involved in being a girl. But I felt more and more invisible every day.

--
Used CC - lots
Events - Wedding, New Addition to Family

If anything needs changing, let me know :)

[GigaRevival]

^^Can you underline the quotes you needed to integrate; to at least keep all contestant entries consistent and easy for the judges?

Looks like you included everything else, as far as I'm aware. ;) *thumbs up*

[blackivy]

There, fixed!

[GigaRevival]

Ah... Thank you. MUCH better.

And Congratulations on entering the contest!

[heaven]

Yay! And a Sims2 entry to boot! I have to say, I find it amusing that your CC was entered as "lots". Made me chuckle. Welcome and we are very glad to have you!

EDIT: Crap...I should probably keep up and update the main page. :lol:

[Shhh]

I really like that. It's the first Sims 2 Chapter :D .

[Myshia]

I've decided to take the plunge and not use screenshots, even though i'm sure i'll get deducted.. but hey its all fun right? ;) I'm not sure if the second quote counts, the way i've used it cause i've omitted a few words.

themes:
hobo/homeless
chance meeting

It was beyond freezing as he stepped outside the house. He tugged his bare jacket closely, though what little warmth he had gained was soon lost by the incoming breeze. His teeth chattered harshly against each other, he couldn't stand it for another night. He wanted to waltz away and blend in with the other carefree civilians. He stood there staring up at the vacant sky, finding the moon and stars are comforting light in his own entire world. He bobbed down, preparing himself comfortably to sleep on the hard concrete ground.

Even as the sun rose for another morning, the door still strangely had not opened. His stomach was growling intensely for breakfast, no matter how rotten or disgusting it was. He knocked gently on the wooden door, progressively getting louder each time. He was about to scream but then he realised there was no need. The window revealed the house's true colours, everything had simply vanished the night before. Somehow the family of ten had managed quite soundlessly pack all the goods to settle some place else. He had always been the one who was left out of everything.

He tried endlessly to pick the door lock when people didn’t spy on him. His brothers had so easily shoved their way in and he wondered why the same concept couldn't have applied to him. "Weak," they whispered loudly amongst themselves and laughed. "Say you wouldn’t even be like grandfather any day." I only remembered when dad truthfully said, "Sometimes i see myself in you. You’re just like me, a plain loser who must show and exploit their own talents. Then someday nobody can laugh at us when we own the top of the world."

I sat on the muddy steps thinking about how many accomplishments he had achieved over the years in so many fields of life. Everybody clapped their hands together loudly and even raised their wine glasses or tip their hats in respect. It was times like these when i thought my father, who hated guns and had never been to any wars, was the bravest man who ever lived. No one could’ve ever outsmarted his position, people only envied him with great jealously.

When i was only 6, my father's life was cut woefully short. Even though heavy fighting was still going on during 1916, people from all walks of life had managed to come and pay their respects. The wore respectable simple suits and dresses as they wept in simple clusters behind the shadows. A single red rose as beautiful as blood, was dropped slowly into the ground. The dirt was then heaved back into the pit before everyone quickly scrambled to disappear.

The grandeur of Paris had been long ago lost in the terrible gunfire and screams. It had slowly been rebuilt from the work of human hands as they restored this lost beauty. Everything had been trampled over. Even though 5 years had past since the bloody event of WWI and the passing of father, i still managed to survive. I sat lonely on the streets wondering if i would ever have dinner tonight or the next.

I kept trying with door. I had never attempted to back down from a fight and i was not going to let this inanimate object win. Somehow i could not shrug off the feeling someone was laughing in the distance. It wasn’t the voice that belonged to my siblings though. It wasn’t my imagination as i slapped myself cruelly. I happened to turn my head in a trance to meet another pair of eyes staring back at me. The laughter had stopped and she disappeared from view instantly.
“Wait,” i screamed. “Who are you?”
“Do you need help?” she asked.
“Where did you come from?”
“Haven’t you learnt how to travel those alleys by now. You always get scraps from kind people. You must be starving.”
I blushed noting how stupid i was. “Thanks for the tip, now can you really open the door.”
“Sure,” she smiled sweetly. “The key has always been left under the mat.” She slowly produced a slightly rusty sliver key. “This must be yours.”
“Thanks,” i said slowly feeling quite awkward. “Do you want to come inside?”
“Do you want to be partners? What’s mine is yours and what yours is mine.”
I spat out a ball of salvia onto my hands, and she respectively did the same. We shook hands making our first ever agreement. An agreement we vowed to keep forever. By watching her there must have been some skill involved in being a girl. Her cunning edge tactics became the string that kept us both alive.

[Tamlyn]

I've been working on this - at the expense of essays and assignments *guilty look* - but I don't know if I'll manage it before the 21st.

If I do make it, hopefully I'll have plenty of time for the following chapters because I'll already have the main characters and some sets and the like.

[Shhh]

Are you aload to cut up quotes? :?

[missroxor]

Gah, I have my first round written (200 words over but meh) and have my first 3 pics and my game decided to bork...and I haven't even patched. Obviously something from my earlier CC Binge is giving me jip :( Basically everything's fine as long as I keep my characters on this one little strip of land but if I try to make them walk somewhere/teleport etc the dissapear leaving only a plumbob visible or worse still get booted out into the middle of the ocean :wtf: ...so long story short (like I'm any good at that! :rolleyes: ) I don't know if I'm gonna be able to finish getting pics. Think I might need to un-install a load of shiz and I'm hoping it's none of the CAS CC I got for my characters D:

[GigaRevival]

Tamlyn & missroxor: I hope you are both able to enter the contest! We still need five people to get this baby going, so I'm crossing my fingers that everything works out for the both of you. Plus, I want to read your stories; dag-nammit! :)

Shhh: Just PM'd heaven about two minutes ago and awaiting a response. Thanks for asking. ;)

[heaven]

I too am hoping that both tamlyn and missroxor can join. I would love to read more stories!

Also: Excerpts should be used just as they are written. How you use it is up to you though. If someone chooses to change the way the quote has been written, that is their option but they will be at risk for losing points.

[missroxor]

Thanks Giga, I think it might be ok. When that happened I quit without saving so when I went in the game yesterday things seemed fine...so far at least. I'm alos in the lqast rounds of another contest though and it's due a day before this one so I'm trying to get that out the way first. I will be posting my story though, pics or no pics, lol

[LadyAwesome]

So here it begins, in the town of Charlton.
Aiden and Elyssa, two very red headed twins.

We had lived with Granny Lara, who took us in after the death of our parents.
Mother was a sweet and kind soul. We always remembered dancing around the living room
with her. Baking cookies and stuff. Daddy we always did outside things with, like
fishing and playing ball.

One night, after we had been out for dinner this man tried to mug dad. Dad just looked
at him like he was an idiot and punched him right in the nose. It was times like these
when I thought my father, who hated guns and had never been to any wars, was the
bravest man who ever lived. That is my most precious memory I hold onto.

Granny did try her hardest, even though she wasn't a very good cook.

http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30875_11102021314301.jpg

How many words can explain a bond between two siblings? Even since We were toddlers
we had an amazing connection. We did a lot together, chasing each other around the
house playing tag, chasing the neighborhood cat to put a bell on her neck. Heck we
even dug in the sand looking for crabs once. Until it bit into Elyssa's finger, and that was the end of that one.

http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30877_11102021333602.jpg

One gloomy and rain-ridden day, the kids decided they were going to share a room.
We decided to join our bunks together, and got rid of the bottom bunks so they could make a fort.

Fort Ashby they named it.

Their favourite Pac-man lamp, books, Miss tripper (Elyssa's toy bunny), and Mr Noodle
(Aidens bear), a pile of books (for story telling), and Mothers favorite house plant, all got
places in the fort. Of course, the dress-up chest also.

http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30878_111020213414-03.jpg

Our favorite dress-up game was "Battle of the ROAAAAAR-asours."
We would stomp around crushing buildings, in search of the famous medicine that
would turn us back into people.
Sometimes we would have a rolly-polly fight and roll down hills and stuff.
Elyssa always did beat me.
Sometimes I would storm off in a huff; her success was really annoying.

http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30879_11102021342704.jpg

Elyssa really loved to pretend she was a message bearer thing. She would make me sit and listen to her
babbling for hours. By watching her, I began to think there was some skill involved in being a girl.
Maybe she will be the President one day, with all her bossiness and controlling. All while being filled
with a sugary, marshmallow center. Sometimes I wish I had her confidence.

http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30880_11102021345705.jpg

I used to be scared of the dark once; now, I never bothered: I knew that I had Elyssa at my side.
Together we could accomplish anything, defeat evil and triumph over home work.
It gave me a sense of pride to know that after losing so much, we were still able to hold onto little things.
Our innocence, independence, and creativity still gave most people a run for their money.
It gave our dreams more of a special touch.

http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30881_11102021351806.jpg

But like everything, when you are having a good time and everything is perfect, something has to go wrong.

It was a Saturday morning. Not long after breakfast. We were playing hide and seek, Elyssa was counting upstairs.
While I was running outside, I slipped and bumped my head on the side of the pool.
It took a while before Elyssa found me. But it was too late.
The poor girl has to live with that vision for the rest of her life.

http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30882_11102021354207.jpg

The day of my funeral Elyssa was calm and collected. After the men had come and put my head stone
in the hill in the front yard where we used to play tag, she planted some dandelions and agapanthus or something.
She had put up with all these people coming to pay their respects, spoke to them politely but was on the
verge of breaking. Then, once everyone was gone and the sun had started to set, Elyssa broke down.
The tears began to fall and they wouldn't stop.

http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30883_11102021360108.jpg

Granny had watched from the window. Once she had cleared everything she needed to take care of, she set out to
comfort her grandbaby. She wanted to comfort her. Give her solace, and tell her everything is going to be ok.
But Elyssa wouldn't hear of it.
"JUST LEAVE ME ALONE GRANNY, EVERYONE IS DEAD AND SOON YOU WILL BE TOO," yelled Elyssa.
Granny stood there for a bit just staring at Elyssa, not sure what to say and not wanting to making anything worse.
"It's going to get better sweetheart, and I will try my best not to leave you anytime soon." Granny soothed as she finally
got to hold her grandchild in her arms, in attempts to hide her from all things miserable.

http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30884_11102021362909.jpg

After Granny finally got Elyssa to sleep, she broke down too. Blaming herself for this tragic incident, causing
Elyssa more pain then she deserved. Knowing fair well that if she had that damn pool fenced, this would not have
happened. She decided she was going to have it emptied and filled with concrete tomorrow. Still, this would not take
away the pain, the aching and the hurt. Three beautiful souls taken away far too early and watching everyone else suffer.
But she will be here for her grandchild, even if it kills her.

http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30885_11102021364710.jpg


[Edit - I think the only CC I used was Armiels world Charlton
Also - I just had an idea. ARe my pictures classed as photoshopping - they were only resized.]

[Buckley]

Great stories everybody! I'm really enjoying reading them all. I think I'm going to join, but when do you stop accepting applications? I thought I read somewhere that it was on October 22, but I can't remember for sure. I apologize if it is completely obvious. :)

[LadyAwesome]

look on the first page buckley :)

[Buckley]

Thanks Lady Awesome. *blushes* I missed that little black countdown button... :)

[GigaRevival]

Hooray! Glad to have you LA!

I hope you join as well Buckley. NEED.MOAR.STORIES!

[LadyAwesome]

I think it is like 11 hours or something

[ReyaD]

Actually about a day and a half according to the countdown (If I'm reading it right).

Buckley don't make me go Rambo on your behind. You already promised me you'd enter so now you have to.

So once Buckley's done we'll need three more, right? I hope we get enough!

[GigaRevival]

Assuming that missroxor and Tamlyn join, we'll be at nine (I believe). But I'm not entirely sure they are, so....

*crosses fingers*

[LadyAwesome]

By the way, you don't HAVE to have 10 its just a guideline. but 10 is a good number.

[Tamlyn]

Chapter One: Shadows
http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c157/nylmat/Sims/Sofie%20Story%20Contest/1Courtyard.jpg
I saw the shadows move in the courtyard today.

Reacting on instinct, I rolled into sunlight. I crouched, watching, waiting for the ripple that was the enemy shadowstepping. Nothing. My eyes darted about, my muscles tense. Gradually, I relaxed. I shouldn’t have been there, not with the sun high and the contrast between shadow and light great. But I liked the courtyard. Our father, Damian, called it a hodge-podge of history. I just knew it was pretty and peaceful and my distraction could have gotten me killed. But no creature slipped from the shadows; I was lucky. My twin brother would have been furious with me, and for that reason I stupidly didn’t raise the alarm.
http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c157/nylmat/Sims/Sofie%20Story%20Contest/2Sentry.jpg
I knew Shane stood sentry on the other side of the wall, along with Jorge. The residence was important enough to rate an army presence, and Shane was often stationed here. He hated it. He wanted to be on the frontlines, doing something useful, not here, with our father the coward, where any could recognise our shame.
http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c157/nylmat/Sims/Sofie%20Story%20Contest/3Blood.jpg
At least he could be proud of me, even though I wasn’t allowed to enter the military. I was marked; born with immunity in my blood and too precious to risk in battle. It wasn’t so bad. I wanted to fight, like Shane, but I was necessary still. I told myself I didn’t mind the endless blood tests and the prodding and the poking. Sometimes I even believed myself.
http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c157/nylmat/Sims/Sofie%20Story%20Contest/4Study.jpg
I went straight from the courtyard to the dim hallways, were the shadows were cast by artificial light, and underground to the residence proper. I entered Damian’s study and tried to ignore the surge of comfort at the unique room. Shane disapproved of it. It was neither proper nor hygienic. Damian sat at his desk, bent over work.

“Sofie.”

“Father. There may have been an incursion in the courtyard.”

Damian’s fingers flew over his keypad as he brought the security systems up onto the monitors. It took him only seconds, and my comfort at the room dissolved into resentment. He was brilliant. He could do so much for us, and yet he hid here, afraid and weak.
http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c157/nylmat/Sims/Sofie%20Story%20Contest/5Alarm.jpg
“Everything seems fine. What were you doing there at this time?” He turned, radiating disapproval. Raising a false alarm was better than letting something slip by. My actions, on the other hand...

“I’m sorry. I was foolish.” I made my voice meek and bowed my head in case my face wasn’t sombre enough.

His slow chuckle startled me; I darted a quick look through my lashes. “Sofie, my dear. It’s good to see your response for once, not Shane’s.”

I frowned, confused – I had made a perfectly proper reply; Shane would have said the same had he been so foolish as I. He would have been sincere, but I wanted to be, so that counted for something. Damian moved to speak again, his gaze gentle.

But the alarm blared and cut off any explanation he might have given.
http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c157/nylmat/Sims/Sofie%20Story%20Contest/6Elevator.jpg
Shane met us as we headed for the surface – he’d just been relieved, but he already knew what was going on. One creature: an intrusion, not an invasion. But, Shane explained with terse words, there was an anomaly. A girl, running from the creature.

“A girl?” Damian’s voice was too mild.

“Yes. She—”

“Don’t ever describe a child as an anomaly.”

As we waited in the elevator that seemed to move at the pace of an old-world one, Damian and Shane stood either side of me and the air bristled between them. Even as I shot Shane an understanding look, a slight roll of my eyes, I couldn’t help but agree with our father. A girl is not an anomaly.
http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c157/nylmat/Sims/Sofie%20Story%20Contest/7Caught.jpg
We were almost too late. The creature bent over the girl – she must have tripped. It was going to kill her, to rend her, to eat her, to – my thoughts skidded to a halt. There were too many horror stories; I didn’t know what was true. But it was anger that rushed through me, not fear, despite never having been this close to one of them before. It looked up, a jerky movement like a trapped animal. Training took over, and I stepped back out of harm’s way. Shane nodded in quick approval; I couldn’t help a smile.
http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c157/nylmat/Sims/Sofie%20Story%20Contest/8Brave.jpg
Jorge’s primary weapon was charged, but he couldn’t use it for risk of hitting the girl. Shane pulled a handgun, but it was Damian who rushed in, unarmed, and the creature bolted from him. It was times like these when I thought my father, who hated guns and had never been to any wars, was the bravest man alive. And I hated him for it. I hated the evidence that he wasn’t a coward, despite not being out there fighting. Because it made me question why.
http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c157/nylmat/Sims/Sofie%20Story%20Contest/9Regret.jpg
No one bothered to chase the creature; we were too near the woods, and that was their territory. Shane wanted to, but I still stared at Damian. He bent to lift the child in his arms. By watching her, I began to think there was some skill involved in being a girl, for I could not remember ever being treated so gently. Like I was a precious commodity, yes; like I was fragile, no. I was just treated the same way as Shane, and for the first time I resented it. I dragged my eyes away.
http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c157/nylmat/Sims/Sofie%20Story%20Contest/10Human.jpg
My gaze fell on the creature. He spun to face us as he reached the shadows large enough to step through. I stared. He looked so... human. Like he thought and felt, like me. And I realised I thought ‘he’, not ‘it’. I couldn’t think ‘it’, not when he glared back with such angry but sad intelligence.

Shane followed my gaze. He smirked. “Mutant. He’ll die easy.”

I shook my head. The creature stepped back and disappeared. Biting my lip, I stared at the space he had been. He was a mutant, a creature, our enemy. But he looked far too human.
_____________________________________ _ _ _
Twins & Paranormal Creature.
CC: Skin, Eyes, Poses

Let me know if the pictures are crazy, I'm trusting automatic resize and they looked crazy in the preview.

[Elexis]

What's the size of screenshots is allowed?
When my resolution is 1920x1080, so they NEED to be resized. But I'm afraid I'll lose some quality and details by resizing such big screenshots.
Is sharpen filter is allowed? It would be very helpful to get clear and crisp view without blurriness. :rolleyes:

[Tamlyn]

Elexis - I'm in the same boat (1920x1200), which is why I'm letting auto resize and people can click for bigger size. But it's still doing crazy things for me, so I might have to rethink that.

[Elexis]

Elexis - I'm in the same boat (1920x1200), which is why I'm letting auto resize and people can click for bigger size. But it's still doing crazy things for me, so I might have to rethink that.

Yeah, some of your pictures just don't want to be resized somehow :D
It's a bit hard when you need to scroll far away every time to read the last part of the sentence.

[Tamlyn]

That should be better. I resized to 920 and reuploaded. They're still decent screenshots. Let me know if it's still awkward :)

Edit: Meh. They're still being crazy. I'll check it tomorrow and delete the entire post if necessary.

[heaven]

First of all, I wake up to not one, but TWO new stories this morning. *heaven is happy dancing in her chair*

Also, regarding screenshots, I always let mine autosize. If you're worried about it, maybe do the MTS screenshot maxs: 1280 I believe is the largest they can be. Now I am going to update the front page. One day left everyone!!!

[Elexis]

First of all, I wake up to not one, but TWO new stories this morning. *heaven is happy dancing in her chair*

Also, regarding screenshots, I always let mine autosize. If you're worried about it, maybe do the MTS screenshot maxs: 1280 I believe is the largest they can be. Now I am going to update the front page. One day left everyone!!!

What about the sharpen filter? Can I use it?

[heaven]

Sharpen is getting a little into the realm of photoshop. I will say that if it doesn't LOOK like it's been messed with, we won't know. So just don't oversharpen it and make sure it's the entire image.

And LadyAwesome, resizing does NOT count as photoshopping so no worries there.

[leesester]

Um, on the big screenshots - I think we should stick to the forum rules as much as possible - at least in Round 1. Half of the stories have smaller pics as by the rules and it doesn't seem fair that some entries can have really big pics. I realise that the resizing of the image and so on will affect picture crispness, but yea.

Link to Sims Contest Rules (http://www.modthesims.info/showthread.php?t=341258)

Try using MYP to host the pictures as well.

[heaven]

What Lee said. :)

[leesester]

Just an update on the pictures - I have asked HP and it could just be outdated rules - hopefully we can have a rules update for Round Two :)

[Elexis]

Chapter 1: The Perfect Plan

http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30898_111021135908City.jpg

The city of Bridgeport hides a long and dark history behind its tall buildings and bright lights. Sometimes local citizens call it a “Two-Faced City”, because of its misleading peaceful appearance. In the day time Bridgeport is a normal busy city, lots of shops and offices, colorful signboards and hard working, but happy people. However, everything changes when the sun goes down.
The night Bridgeport is a very unsafe place to be, high count of robberies and murders scare everyone away from staying too long on the streets. The city seems to be very empty in its dark hours and the reason for all of this is the “Night Riders”.

http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30899_111021135949Gang.jpg

“The Night Riders” are a famous crime gang which rules the city at night. They are ruthless and cruel thugs who won’t spare anyone’s life just to get complete domination of this city.
They ride expensive choppers and wear a lot of leather. Their names were changed in to nicknames and loyalty was marked with blood.
“Riders” controlled the “black market” for guns, drugs and luxurious vehicles in the city. Their main intention was to eliminate any rival shops and establish full economical control. They were ready to remove anyone who stands in their way.

http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30900_111021140019Emperior.jpg

Like all gangs do, the “Riders” have a leader. “The Emperor” or “Emperor of Evil” was the most bloody-minded and brutal of all gang members. Everyone respected him like he was the real Emperor and their gang was an Empire. He and 4 of his best men were the “elite”, he newer went anywhere without them.
Emperor was well known for his famous “Fire of gratefulness”, when he burned people alive in their own houses if someone disobeyed his rules. Many lives have ended that way, many homes were burned and many peoples wanted him dead.

http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30901_111021140035Mayor.jpg

But things went downhill for “Night Riders” since the new mayor was elected.
Young and brave, an exemplary family man quickly got all the sympathies and became a strong and trustworthy leader of the city of Bridgeport. He had a strong plan for eliminating the cruel gang.
Reinforced police forces now patrolled every corner of the city, many shops got protection. But “Riders” gang didn’t give up, their cruelty grew tenfold. More and more innocent police men and shop keepers got hurt.
The war between “good and evil” got even more serious than before.

http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30902_111021140101Guy.jpg

All gang members mostly were unscrupulous and greedy thugs, except one. Han Simmons.
The most quiet, young and innocent-looking guy was the only “Riders” gang member who didn’t seek benefit. His sad, sky colored eyes and careless exterior showed that he’s been trough some difficult times lately. Han was soon to be 20 and like other guys his age, he should be in college, not in a crime gang. But his soul was tainted with some bad and dark intentions, even when he hasn’t killed anybody yet, but his biggest and the only wish was to get revenge. Revenge on someone who has killed his family.

http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30903_111021140122Fire.jpg

Han’s father was a pharmacist, he run a drug shop in the central square of Bridgeport. Low prices and good service created a strong competition to “Night Riders” drug shops monopoly. The “Riders” have threatened him multiple times to sell his pharmacy to the gang, but he refuses and kept the shop to himself. It was times like these when Han thought his father, who hated guns and had never been to any wars, was the bravest man who ever lived. But his bravery brought him death.
One late evening when little Han returned home, his whole house was on fire and his parents were trapped inside. It was too late to save them from the deadly „Fire of gratefulness“.

http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30904_111021140139Dog Days.jpg

Years have passed, but the sorrow still burned in Han’s heart with the same strength. He promised himself that he would get revenge for his patent’s death, no matter how much it would cost him.
Since the day he was left an orphan, he became more mature than other teenage boys. He spent his days in a foster home with no one to share his pain, but he didn’t give up and created a perfect plan on how to get revenge.
Han needed money, so with his last savings, he bought an old guitar and started playing for tips. He was talented and he quickly earned enough money to make the next step in his accurate plan.

http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30905_111021140159Joining.jpg

The main idea was to join the “Night Riders”, get to know them, gain their trust and then “strike” in the right moment. Sounds easy? Well it wasn’t that easy as Han would have thought. It was very hard to find the gang members and not to get beaten by them. He spent 2 years observing them and he didn’t get caught. In that time he learned many things about them and gained very useful skills. He listened and waited for the right moment to encounter them.
“Riders” were suspicious about him at first, but he managed to convince them and Han finally became one of the “Night Riders”.

http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30906_111021140227Bad Jobs.jpg

By the time Han has proved himself to be very useful to the “Riders”, he was indispensable when they needed to get information about their next „victim“. He could stalk someone 24h per day and no one would notice him. Han‘s young age helped him to mix into the croud, because no one would believe that such a handsome and nice young man could be a thug.
His job was simple: stalk the victim, follow it and finally entrap it. The gang fellows would do the rest.
Han wasn‘t proud of what he‘s doing, but it was the only way to get their trust. Only a trustworthy member could get close to the “Emperor“ itself.

http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30907_111021140244Rider.jpg

He knew that he couldn‘t just follow and stalk gang‘s victims forever. One day he will have to kill someone. Someone innocent. Someone like his parents...
Han tried to avoid thoughts like that, but the truth was innevitable. There‘s still good in him, his hope of a better life hasn‘t died. Even if he‘ll succeed at killing the “Emperor“, what would happened to him? Death by the gang members hand? – Probably yes. Jail for about 20 years? – Maybe. But what about a happy life with a clear conscience? – No, that would be impossible.
Han rode away on his black motorcycle from thoughts like this, the sun will rise soon and he needs to hide his dark side from the rest of the world.
He didn‘t know it yet, but his first „serious“ job awaited him at the „Riders“ headquarters.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Events: Emperor of Evil, Murder.
CC used: Skin by Lemonleaf, eyes by Escand, clothes and hair from The Store.

[LadyAwesome]

I don't know if I am blind, but there does it mention picture size???

[Elexis]

I don't know if I am blind, but there does it mention picture size???
The size is in the Forum Rules, not in the Contest Rules. The minimum size is 800 by 600 pixels and the maximum is 1280 by 1024 (I think).

[LadyAwesome]

oh ffs!!!!!!!!!!!!!1'
I dont have time to fix them
*flails and gives up*

[Elexis]

oh ffs!!!!!!!!!!!!!1'
I dont have time to fix them
*flails and gives up*

That's okay, you are not the only one :D So just be sure to make bigger screenshots for the next round :)

[leesester]

Yea, in the Contest Forum Rules it says :

Please keep picture sizes within reasonable limits. We don't all have DSL connections so huge connections can take forever to load. The OPTIMUM picture size is 650x550. The Contests Forum Moderators will judge larger images on a case by case basis and may request you resize images. Failure to comply when asked will result in your post being removed.

I think some of the earlier posters went with optimum as required - but AS OF THE NEXT ROUND we can follow the site rules for screenshots as outlined by Elexis. I will ask HP if I can edit that bit of the Contest Forum Rules.

I think we should just not mark down for screenshot sizes in this round, that is fair I think. All the pics are big enough to see and that is what matters.

[ReyaD]

When I check my submission, half the time the photos are resized, half the time they stretch the page. I'm not exactly sure what I did.

[heaven]

Alright everyone. Time is getting close. Good luck to all of you who are still persisting to get this round in. Round 1 will close in approximately 8 hours. Round 2 should be posted pretty much immediately so there should be no delay in getting started. Hopefully, scores and comments will be done by the end of the weekend. Looking forward to waking up with more entries tomorrow!

[whitewaterwood]

http://i365.photobucket.com/albums/oo94/WhiteWaterWood/Sims/ScreenShot6327.jpg
The setting; a funeral. The character; my father. All the pieces were in place and all the actors dressed in black. The sky played its role perfectly, dark clouds hanging above and the earth heavy with mud around my feet. I played my role too. I showed up. No one could ask anything more of me. I was the daughter of the woman he had abandoned for his harlot. The daughter he had lived in the same city with for seventeen years yet had not spoken to since she was two. No one asked me to cry. I obliged them by shedding no tears.

http://i365.photobucket.com/albums/oo94/WhiteWaterWood/Sims/ScreenShot6336.jpg
My mom was standing beside my aunt. I wasn't sure if she was upset or not, or if anyone expected that either. It had never really been my place to ask if she had still loved my father. I wasn't sure of what my reaction would be if she did. Even in his absence, my father had still managed to cause more than just emotional pain to our family. Debt collectors of all shapes, sizes and colors (most with shady backgrounds) had created several traumatic events for me as a child. I wondered how many of the people at this funeral my father had owed money to.

http://i365.photobucket.com/albums/oo94/WhiteWaterWood/Sims/ScreenShot6331.jpg
The sky rumbled ominously as a boy got up to speak. I only knew 3 people at this funeral personally, but I knew his name at least. Colton Reinout. My half-brother. Despite my hatred for the father that had abandoned me, I wondered what his 'real' son thought of him. All I knew about my dad was the he was a traitorous coward who loved money more than his own daughter. I had never been given a chance to see him as anything different. I wonder if there was anything different to see.

http://i365.photobucket.com/albums/oo94/WhiteWaterWood/Sims/ScreenShot6328.jpg
“My father,” Colton began, “Was an honorable man.” My fist tightened. Lies. “We were often in debt, but he did his best to make ends meet.” Leaving the debt and his abandoned child and ex-wife. No money. Gangsters with my father's promise of more money. Helpless. “He always had a kind word for everyone and no matter how hard it got he was always there for his family.” The clock is ticking. Men with guns. Where was my father with the ransom? He wouldn't answer the phone. “He was my role model and everything I aspired to be.” He was HORRIBLE.

http://i365.photobucket.com/albums/oo94/WhiteWaterWood/Sims/ScreenShot6329.jpg
Colton, the son, the liar, the boy with no idea, no IDEA what his father had done to us, continued to speak. “My father once,” he began, and from his mouth spewed a story about lazy days in the park and a kind man who was anything BUT my father and a million falsehoods. “It was times like these when I thought my father, who hated guns and had never been to any wars, was the bravest man who ever lived.” he finished and everyone applauded. I didn't clap. My hands were too tightly balled in fists. Furious tears running down my face, I walked away from the grave. Nothing followed me but concerned glances.

http://i365.photobucket.com/albums/oo94/WhiteWaterWood/Sims/ScreenShot6324.jpg
After the funeral was over, I returned to the grave. I wasn't sure why. Maybe I just wanted to be within spitting distance of it. It only took a few minutes for Colton Reinout to show up, looking awkward and pitying.
“I know it's hard. You never knew your father.” He began softly, looking up at me with earnest eyes moistened with unshed tears. Was he trying to comfort me? Didn't he know I was happy his father was head? Did he really mistake my leaving in anger for grief?

http://i365.photobucket.com/albums/oo94/WhiteWaterWood/Sims/ScreenShot6330.jpg
I knew him, alright.” I said coldly, and suddenly pent up fury and all the things I could never tell my father in his lifetime spilling out like it was Jerry Springer, “He was a JERK.” He looked taken aback, and then his eyes narrowed furiously. “You go up there and talk about all the great things he did and what a great father he was, but you only look at the kind of father he was to you! What a perfect father he was to YOU.” My fists tightened further, “Well he wasn't a good father. He was the worst father possible and the worst kind of person! I am GLAD he's dead!”

http://i365.photobucket.com/albums/oo94/WhiteWaterWood/Sims/ScreenShot6334.jpg
“You-” he started. His fist began to raise. He was going to punch me. He was going to punch me on his fathers grave. I was about to get into a fist fight on top of my father's grave. In terms of desecrating the dead's memory, that had to be near the top of the list. The thought nearly made me grin, far past caring. Heck yeah. Punch me. Let's get into a fight, maybe knock over the headstone. I didn't know if I could fight; I didn't know if he could fight either, but right now it seemed like the best idea in the world.

http://i365.photobucket.com/albums/oo94/WhiteWaterWood/Sims/ScreenShot6339.jpg
He lowered his fist. I wonder if I managed to hide my look of disappointment.
“I won't fight you on my fathers grave.” Colton said firmly, and he looked stronger than he had before. “Not you. Not family.”
“Family?” I repeated, nearly growling. No! I wanted a fight. Not this! “You aren't my family! You aren't-” My nails bit into my palms, and I gnashed my teeth. “Listen. You are NOT my family. Not you or your father!” When he didn't say anything, I spun on my heel and left. I had come to my father's funeral and I had gotten in the last word. This was all the closure I needed, I told myself.

http://i365.photobucket.com/albums/oo94/WhiteWaterWood/Sims/ScreenShot6343.jpg
10 minutes later...
“Oh god, I'm a JERK!” I covered my face in horror and leaned heavily against a tree. “I almost beat up a kid on top of his dad's grave! Does that mean I'm going to hell?” I had just managed to get rid of my dad, I didn't want to be visiting him and Satan any time soon. “Should I make this up to Langer or I should I just stay away from him? Is this going to traumatize him?”
I sat against the tree for a few more minutes, worrying, until I at last felt the energy slip out of me. Something particular about the conversation with Colton was stuck in my mind, worrying me. I bit my lip.
“Are we really... family?”

To Be Continued

---------------------------------------------
How was it? I hope it was okay! I love constructive criticism, especially because I'm not really used to writing anymore.

When I read the quote for this section, my immediate thought was “I want to write a story about someone who hates their dad!” :lol: I had a lot of fun with this, though. It's been ages since I played sims2, but I can't pose sims like I want in sims3 at all.

Note: The quote is on the 5th image, and the keywords used are “funeral” and “new addition to family.” The new addition to the family refers to the fact that Colton and Theodora (the main character) have never met before, but Colton now considers them family.

Thank you very much for reading and I can't wait to see what all these talented people do for round two!

EDIT: It's been so long since I downloaded anything for sims2 or even played that I don't know if anything is pay. I've never downloaded pay content, but it sometimes sneaks in with houses and full sim downloads. So if I used any pay content, it wasn't purposeful. Please go easy on me!

[GigaRevival]

^^I know you told us where the quotes are, but can you underline them for consistency? It's just easier for me to actually see them highlighted/bolded/what-have-you because I'll most likely forget to look for them while I'm reading.
Remember, the judges are new to this contest as well. :jest:

I agree, I'm looking forward to round 2! And Congratulations on entering!

Edit: Just saw the conversation regarding images; so we are not marking down for sizes this round? I'm totally down with that as everyone is currently learning the ropes and getting their bearings straight with regards to the pictures it seems. The idea gets a double :up: :up: from me.

[whitewaterwood]

Bolded! Thanks for the reminder! :)

[GigaRevival]

No problem. Thank you for making the changes.

[leesester]

This is all so cool - now I have to go do some work - i.e. start judging. I am having a lot of fun waiting for the "quote" in each story - I sit here reading and then I think here we GO and POW - quote. I do a fishpunch at that moment :)

[Morphead]

This task hath been arduous, for woe is I. CAH doth not work for fear of appeasing me. Alas, my script is incomplete. For not my commitment, I'd post nary a word. But as it is, I giveth to thou my plot.

Any likeness to any character or person, fictional or real, is purely coincidence.

Boundless.

Events: Funeral + Emperor of Evil
Word Count: 1,115 (706)
CC Used: None
Bonus round complete: No


The below spoiler contains the unedited version I was going to use with pictures. It may help explain some parts you could find confusing as it holds extra omniscient information.

This story, due to lack of pictures, is in script-like format. Bracketed text, "[ ]", identifies location or view. This is where a picture would had been.

[Open to funeral, moderate distance, ten or so people]

[Car View, expensive make]
Evil Lord:
With Caress out of the way I can finally put my plan into action without resistance.
Deleruis:
Was it necessary to go this far, sir?
Evil Lord:
I will not tolerate obstructions in this. He had been problem too long and refused to leave quietly. It’s his fault really… Driver, let’s go.

[Mourners, close distance]
Wife:
I… I .. I can’t believe he’s gone!
Woman 1:
He lived a wonderful life Mrs. Lanrutcon. He is a hero among us all. I’m sure he’s looking down from heaven now, smiling on you.
Mrs. Lanrutcon:
Th.. Thank you. It means a lot. Really.

[Close up; Kawlin]
Kawlin:
Dad, I swear I’ll avenge you; even if it takes the rest of my life.

[convo scene, close, man 1/kawlin]
Man 1:
Kawlin, I’m so sorry about your father. I’ll never be able to understand senseless murder…
Kawlin:
You know, It was times like these when I thought my father, who hated guns and had never been to any wars, was the bravest man who ever lived… Only now I’d rather him a coward and alive, than brave and dead.
Man 1:
Your father did the right thing Kawlin. He is a hero and will be remembered as such.
Kawlin:
…
Man 1:
Will you be taking helm of his company then?
Kawlin:
Only temporarily, it was willed to my brother; but, of course, he has been missing for years. If he returns he will assume command.

[close up; man 1, kawlin still visible]
Man 1:
How odd your father would do that.
Kawlin:
I never held an interest in taking over. My brother and I, while similar, are two very different people.

[Mom walks to kawlin]
Mrs. Lanrutcon:
Oh Kawlin! I can’t believe your father is gone. It’s this damned business of his. It’s been nothing but trouble from the beginning.
Kawlin:
Somehow I fail to see how running a car plant can be trouble.
Mom:
It’s that F. P. Domynatum. He held a monopoly on the market until your father came along; He can’t stand losing business. I swear he had something to do with this!
Kawlin:
Mr. Domynatum is one the nicest persons I’ve met, Mom. I doubt he had anything to do with this.

[woman 1 holds mom]
Mom:
Now that you have control of the company you’ll see… He’s a monster!
Woman 1:
Mrs. Lanrutcon, why don’t you come with me? This is a stressful time for us all.
Kawlin:
Yeah, I think we all should head home now.

[View of home]

[inside door]
Mom:
I’m going to lie down for awhile, dear.
Kawlin:
Take as long as you need Mom. Don’t worry about a thing. I’m going to head to the dealership.
Mom:
Be safe, your all I have now.

[hugs]

[open to dealer; Mr. Domynatum waiting]
Kawlin:
Mr. Domynatum, what are doing here?
Mr. Domynatum:
I thought we could take a moment to talk about some things. Your father and I were in the middle of business talks before his unexpected death. I hope we can continue them?
Kawlin:
Uh, of course; let’s go into the office.

[office]
Mr. Domynatum:
I’ll get straight to the point. Your father and I were discussing the selling of ME Designs Motors to me. We had just reached a price when he died…
Kawlin:
My father was going to sell the dealership? That doesn’t really seem like him.
Mr. Domynatum:
I assure you it’s true. Unfortunately, your father had the papers, which are now missing.
Kawlin:
Even if this is true, I don’t have the power to sell the business alone. My father willed the dealership to my missing brother. So I’d need his signature as well.
Mr. Domynatum:
I see. Well, good day then.

[car view]
Deleruis:
Seems Mr. Lanrutcon thought ahead.
Evil Lord:
Yes, even in death he is still a thorn in my sides.
Deleruis:
What do we do now, sir?
Evil Lord:
We find the missing brother.


“With Caress out of the way I can finally put my plan into action without resistance.”
“Was it necessary to go this far, sir?”
“I will not tolerate obstructions in this. He had been problem too long and refused to leave quietly. It’s his fault really… Driver, let’s go.”

*~*-*~*

The air was calm. Still, there was an oppressing gray tint to it. My lime green hair stood out against the dread of black. I kept my eyes hidden behind its shag, not wanting to subject myself to the pity of others. I stared at the tombstone before me. I could hear my Mother crying out not far from my spot.
“I… I .. I can’t believe he’s gone!” .
Some woman came to her side, I’m not sure who. “He lived a wonderful life Mrs. Lanrutcon. He is a hero among us all. I’m sure he’s looking down from heaven now, smiling on you.” She said.
“Th.. Thank you. It means a lot. Really.” Still sniffling.

“Dad, I swear I’ll avenge you; even if it takes the rest of my life.” I mutter, gritting me teeth. Out of my periphery, I see someone walking to me. A man, stout and rosy. I’d only seen him once or twice before. He worked with my father I think.
“Kawlin, I’m so sorry about your father. I’ll never be able to understand senseless murder…” He says.
I grimace, “You know, It was times like these when I thought my father, who hated guns and had never been to any wars, was the bravest man who ever lived… Only now I’d rather him a coward and alive, than brave and dead.”
He stares at me stunned, but soon regains his composure. “Your father did the right thing Kawlin. He is a hero and will be remembered as such.”
“…”
“Uh, Will you be taking helm of his company then?” He continues.
“Only temporarily, it was willed to my brother; but, of course, he has been missing for years. If he returns he will assume command.”

The man is quite for a moment, seemingly lost in thought. “How odd your father would do that.” He finally states.
“Well, I never held an interest in taking over. My brother and I, while similar, are two very different people.” I say flatly.

My Mother, still distraught, walks to me. She appears lost, confused. I can’t blame her. Not many people handle the murder of their loved one very easily. Surprisingly, I’m doing OK.
“Oh Kawlin! I can’t believe your father is gone.” She starts, “It’s this damned business of his. It’s been nothing but trouble from the beginning.”
“Somehow I fail to see how running a car plant and dealer can be trouble.” I say skeptically.
Ignoring me she rants on, “It’s that F. P. Domynatum. He held a monopoly on the market until your father came along; He can’t stand losing business. I swear he had something to do with this!”
I could see her anger was beginning to creep into her face. “Mr. Domynatum is one the nicest persons I’ve met, Mom. I doubt he had anything to do with this.”
She shakes her head, “Now that you have control of the company you’ll see… He’s a monster!” Her fury was evident now, alerting some of the other guests to a problem.
The woman from earlier walks up to us. “Mrs. Lanrutcon, why don’t you come with me? This is a stressful time for us all.” She says, trying to diffuse the moment.
“Yeah, I think we all should head home now anyway.” I suggest. I start towards the car with my Mother and the woman. I steal a final glance back towards my father. My dead father…

*~*-*~*

We arrive back home to our mansion. We are let out In front, still surround by our police escort. The walk seems longer than usual. Not because of the enormous yard, but from the waiting air of loneliness that awaits the interior of the house.
We walk through the front door, my Mother first.
“I’m going to lie down for awhile, dear.” She wearily says.
I turn to leave, “Take as long as you need Mom. Don’t worry about a thing. I’m going to head to the dealership.”
She pulls on my arm, stopping me and stares hard at me. After a pause, she pulls me into a hug, “Be safe, your all I have now.”

*~*-*~*
I pull up to NRAY Motors lost in thought. I have no idea how I’m going to manage the 2nd largest car maker in SimNation. I park the car and get out. I pause to take in the surroundings. Cars, cars, F.P Domynatum, cars… F.P. Domynatum?
“Mr. Domynatum, what are you doing here?”
F.P. Domynatum is a lean, darker skinned man with a full head of smooth dark coffee bean hair. He radiates wealth and power and is owner of the largest car maker in SimNation, Pwnonm Motors Company. He is also a very kind and generous person.
“I thought we could take a moment to talk about some things.” He begins. He looks sullen for a moment but continues, “Your father and I were in the middle of business talks before his unexpected death. I hope we can continue them?”
Confusion registers across my face as Father never mentioned anything about partnering with Pwnonm. “Uh, of course; let’s go into the office.”
We walk into my Fath- MY office, and get comfortable.
Mr. Domynatum looks about, taking special interest in the desk. “I’ll get straight to the point. Your father and I were discussing the selling of NRAY Motors to me. We had just reached a price when he died…”
I faltered my response to take in what he had said. “My father was going to sell the dealership? That doesn’t really seem like him.”
Mr. Domynatum shows a face of distaste before replacing it with cautious optimism.
“I assure you it’s true. Unfortunately, your father had the papers, which are now missing.” He presses. He turns his head and closes his eyes. He rotated back and his expression looked what most closely resembled a “Puss-in-boots” face.
“Even if this is true, I don’t have the power to sell the business alone. My father willed the dealership to my missing brother. So I’d need his signature as well.” I say.
Mr. Domynatum feigned a face of placidity, but I could see a tick growing in his jaw.
“I see. Well, good day then.”

*~*-*~*

“Seems Mr. Lanrutcon thought ahead.”
“Yes, even in death he is still a thorn in my sides.”
“What do we do now, sir?”
“We find the missing brother.”

[missroxor]

Losing Myself in Paradise

Events: Homeless + Adventure
Word Count: 1,212
CC Used other than that allowed: sliders, make-up and a pattern (edit to add: forgot about the clothes and accessories)
Bonus round complete: No

http://i859.photobucket.com/albums/ab154/missroxor/Contests/Story%20Contest/Chapter%201/1.jpg
“Sadie, wake up!...Sadie Please don’t die!”
“ngh...five more minutes”
“You’re alive! Sadie...aren’t you?”
“Huh? What are you ...” As I opened my eyes and squinted up at Amy’s dirty, tear-stained face a wave a fear washed over me. Amy wasn’t crying because she’d just had a scary dream. I wasn’t tucked up cosy in my bed and that wet sensation wasn’t our dog Fido licking my legs. Gasping for air I jumped to my feet and spun round hoping to see something familiar, a life guard hut, an ice-cream van...even a toilet cubicle would give me some semblance of hope that we were not alone.

http://i859.photobucket.com/albums/ab154/missroxor/Contests/Story%20Contest/Chapter%201/2.jpg
Chunks of twisted metal und burning aircraft furnishings pockmarked the shore like an acne ravaged teen. We seemed to be on the outer rim of a cluster of tiny islands where the only signs of life was the greenery coating the centres of the bigger islands.
“What are we gonna do, Sadie?” Amy looked up at me with big round eyes full of both hope and fear. I was her big sister, her safety blanket in this foreign land. I’m supposed to make her feel better right? How do I do that when I’m one more lip quiver away from freaking out myself?! I take a couple of deep breaths and steady my voice, “Well, sweetie, we’re going on a big adventure. Like pirates,... we have to scour the beach for any washed up treasure and see if we can hunt out any other pirates walking around.”
“Ooh, can I be Jack Sparrow?”
“Well only if I can be Elizabeth Swann!” I laughed.

http://i859.photobucket.com/albums/ab154/missroxor/Contests/Story%20Contest/Chapter%201/3b.jpg
Amy seems indifferent to our situation; I don’t think she understands fully what’s happened. Hell, I don’t think I fully understand either. The last thing I remember is the turbulence getting worse and then panicking when the emergency lights came on and an oxygen mask flew in my face. I guess we somehow made it through. As Amy stabbed a palm tree with a stick I called to her to help look for ‘treasure’; we’ll need to scavenge what we can from the wreckage in case we have to wait a day to be rescued. She ignored me of course, running off down the beach fighting baddies. In other circumstances the crystal blue water and perfect white beaches would seem like paradise but I didn’t book this on Expedia, there’s nowhere to check in, I just want to go home. Right then my pity party is interrupted by a shrill cry, “Please help him ...do something!”

http://i859.photobucket.com/albums/ab154/missroxor/Contests/Story%20Contest/Chapter%201/4.jpg
Rounding the curve of the shore I felt my whole body exhale; we’re not alone! Running over to small group I saw that one of them was injured. “Hey, do you know first aid?” another called to me.
“uh...a little” I knelt down next to the man laying on the floor and took his pulse. I thought for a moment that I felt a flicker of life but then there was nothing. I looked down at where his thigh has been ripped open. His femoral artery had been severed and the man’s life-force had all but left his body . It was times like these when I thought my father, who hated guns and had never been to any wars, was the bravest man who ever lived. He would know exactly what to do. Heck, he might even have been able to save this man; he’s a talented trauma surgeon after all. I placed my hands over the man’s eyes closing them and turned to the woman knowing that I was about to distinguish that last ray of hope in her eyes, “I’m sorry, he’s lost too much blood”.

http://i859.photobucket.com/albums/ab154/missroxor/Contests/Story%20Contest/Chapter%201/5.jpg
“No!...Oscar, don’t leave me!” the woman crumpled on to the man’s chest sobbing. I look back at Amy who’s stopped fighting imaginary baddies and is staring at the body; in that moment she looks much older than her 6 years. I take her walking 20 or 30ft down the beach; she’s seen enough for one day. The two men of the group come after us leaving the woman curled up next to her lifeless husband.

http://i859.photobucket.com/albums/ab154/missroxor/Contests/Story%20Contest/Chapter%201/6.jpg
As I watch them approach I see the one who spoke earlier is a kinda creepy looking nerdy guy and the other was tanned with sun-kissed hair like a hot surfer. For a moment it’s like the last few hours never happened and I feel myself getting lost in surfer guy’s sparkling brown eyes.
“Hi, I’m Adrian.” Creepy guy chimes in; breaking the beautiful spell I was under. I realise I must’ve been stood with my mouth gaping open like a drooling monkey and rush to animate myself, “um, were you guys on the plane?”...ugh, as surreal as the situation is I somehow manage to retain my usual air of idiocy I see, great! “I mean...uh, how long have you guys been conscious, do you know if there were any more survivors?”
“Well, I came to near Ophelia about 10 minutes ago and we came round here and found Kelly helping Oscar out the water. He’s Kelly by the way”, Adrian said pointing at surfer guy, “and the lady is Ofelia. The dead guy is...was her husband, Oscar. I think we’re the only survivors”, it was a small plane, and there were only a couple more including the pilot.

http://i859.photobucket.com/albums/ab154/missroxor/Contests/Story%20Contest/Chapter%201/7.jpg
“Oh, ok. I’m Sadie and this is my little sister Amy”.
“Hi little one, would you like to play a game?” Gregory bends down to Amy’s height with his hand outstretched. She burrows into my side, obviously not in the mood for creepy stranger danger.
Kelly interrupts the ‘bonding’ moment, “There’s no time for games, we need a shelter and fire. Night is only a few hours away”. His voice is as deep and brooding as his eyes, it’s mesmerising, even when he’s being all bad news bear. “Who knows how long we’ll be here”.

http://i859.photobucket.com/albums/ab154/missroxor/Contests/Story%20Contest/Chapter%201/8.jpg
We spent the next several hours gathering materials for making a fire and shelter. We managed to salvage a few items and bottles of water from the debris that had washed ashore. Not much but it should last us maybe two days if we’re careful. Not that we’ll be here that long. It was clear Kelly was a lot more handy then either me or Gregory so we more or less let him construct the shelter himself. It wasn’t much but at last we had somewhere to call home for the next couple of days.

http://i859.photobucket.com/albums/ab154/missroxor/Contests/Story%20Contest/Chapter%201/9.jpg
At dusk I went to fetch Ofelia. The poor woman hadn’t left Oscar’s side for hours. I eventually convinced her to come to our campsite and warm by the fire Kelly had built. Though she came on the condition that Kelly carries Oscar’s body back to the campsite where we can protect his remains from the elements. She wanted him to receive a proper burial once we were rescued. Kelly didn’t mind, he seemed to be a man of few words but he sure was a handy guy to have around in a survival situation...and man, did I like to watch him work. Adrian on the other hand still struck me as a little odd. Sure, he was most out-going of the three but there was just something about him I didn’t like ...or trust.

[GigaRevival]

This is all so cool - now I have to go do some work - i.e. start judging. I am having a lot of fun waiting for the "quote" in each story - I sit here reading and then I think here we GO and POW - quote. I do a fishpunch at that moment :)

Ha ha... Lee. I was picturing you (a vague figure since I have absolutely no clue what you actually look like) doing the Jersey Shore fist pump in excitement.

Great stories everyone so far! I'm a-readin' and a-judgin' them as I type. :gjob:

@Morphead and missroxor: Thank you for adding that small synopsis at the top. Made checking word count much easier. *wipes brow* This is hard work.

[TheAppleNinja]

Does anybody know, roughly, how long this contest might run for? Because I'm toying with the idea of participating, but I will be leaving in a while and won't be able to keep posting, so I don't want to join and then abandon all you guys halfway through...

[Buckley]

So, I'm really hoping that I can still enter. I'm pretty darn close to the deadline. *crosses fingers* My brand new graphics card (installed a week ago today) decided to have a meltdown yesterday, but I managed to get some shots before it completely died.

Also, I uploaded with MYP, but I didn't know how to resize. Do I just do it with the photo editor program on my computer? I hope that my ignorance will be forgiven for the first round. :)

Please let me know if I forgot/need to change something. Thanks!

Round 1: Flawless
http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30950_111022072133Screenshot-246.jpg
Flawless. The word flitted around my head like a pesky mosquito, mocking me with its evasiveness. Nathaniel waved at me, his face breaking into a relaxed smile, and for the millionth time today I wondered how someone could be so completely and utterly flawless. Ava called to him, and he hurried away. I felt my stomach drop with disappointment, but I tried to keep smiling anyway.
http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30952_111022073423Screenshot-261.jpg
He walked over to her and wrapped his arms around her waist. As she leaned in and stroked his cheek, her long hair draped elegantly over her shoulder, I couldn’t help but feel envious. She moved with such grace, such poise, that by watching her I began to think there was some skill involved in being a girl. A skill that she had somehow managed to master while I was still busy trying to learn the basics.
http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30953_111022073856Screenshot-271.jpg
It was supposed to be my day, a party to celebrate my high school graduation, but as usual it became about my sister Ava. She and Nathaniel were getting married in a couple of weeks, and the entire town was invited to the wedding. It was going to be the event of the year, and naturally everyone was eager to congratulate the happy couple. Everyone except me.
http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30954_111022074053Screenshot-278.jpg
My great aunt Mildred approached me, a large glass of sherry already in her plump little hand.
“Congratulations Lily!” she slurred. “You must be so proud.”
I smiled at her benignly and nodded my head, silently begging her to leave me alone. She may have been drunk, but the old lady made me nervous. It was a well-known fact that Aunt Mildred’s late husband Fred was the richest man on this side of the Big Muddy river. After his death, Mildred took over the estate and became the matriarch of my family. Angering her was akin to angering a hungry lion. You were sure to pay for your crime dearly.
http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30955_111022074243Screenshot-296.jpg
“So Lily,” she continued, her beady little eyes gazing at me expectantly. “Can I expect another wedding any time soon?”
Almost as if he sensed my panic, Dad appeared at my side with another glass of sherry. He handed it to Aunt Mildred, and with an amicable laugh he said, “Oh, Milly, are you bothering my poor daughter again?”
I stared at him in disbelief, my mouth agape with shock. No one called great aunt Mildred “Milly” and lived to tell the tale.
Mildred blinked a couple of times, not fully absorbing my father’s words, before shrieking with laughter.
“I like you Bob,” she said after a minute. “You’ve got balls.” Then she walked away, on to find her next victim.
http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30956_111022074359Screenshot-298.jpg
I smiled faintly at my dad, and he winked back at me. It was times like these when I thought my father, who hated guns and had never been to any wars, was the bravest man who ever lived. Surely I would never have the courage to speak to Mildred that way, to stand up to her the way he just had.
http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30957_111022074449Screenshot-304.jpg
With the party wrapping up and the last guests departing, I eagerly returned to my bedroom to work on my latest project. Last month, a prestigious university in Bridgeport had accepted me into their writing program, but my parents just could not afford the tuition. When they asked Aunt Mildred for help, she flat out refused, claiming that higher education was better left for the men.
“Why don’t you find yourself a nice, young entrepreneur?” she often asked me. “Like I did with your great Uncle Fred.”
The idea left me cold. No, I wanted to make something of myself. I was going to become a famous author one day, and if Aunt Mildred wasn’t going to help then I would make my own way.
http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30958_111022074553Screenshot-327.jpg
I heard a loud knock, and I jumped out of my chair. Before I could answer, the door swung open and Ava strutted into my room.
“What are you doing?” she demanded, her face pinched in disapproval.
“Nothing,” I replied feebly. I hated conflict, but my sister looked ready for a fight.
She rolled her eyes and sighed dramatically. “The night of your high school graduation, and you’re staying home?”
I looked down, embarrassed. She always knew how to hit where it hurt.
Ava snickered cruelly. “Figures,” she said. “I just came in to remind you about the dress fitting tomorrow. If you’re going to be my maid of honor, you’ll need to at least try and look the part.”
I nodded, and she left. Her words, however, continued to sting.
http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30959_111022074643Screenshot-335.jpg
Feeling discouraged, I headed to my mother’s garden to get some fresh air. The soft evening breeze fluttered through my hair as I weaved my way through rows of flowering bushes, the pale moonlight illuminating my path. I glanced up and shivered. Thousands of stars adorned the black night sky, painting a breathtaking scene before my eyes.
http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30960_111022074735Screenshot-344.jpg
“What are you looking at?” He spoke quietly, his voice echoing the stillness of the night.
I turned around slowly and came face to face with Nathaniel. “The stars,” I whispered, smiling.
He chuckled softly. “I thought as much. Your mother wants me to tell you to come inside before you catch a chill, but I’m tempted to stay out here and join you. Ava is talking wedding gibberish again.”
I laughed. These days, that’s all Ava ever talked about. The wedding. “I would welcome the company,” I told him.
He shook his head. “I just wanted to say congratulations. I’m proud of you Lily.” As our eyes met, I felt my breath catch in my chest. How I longed to tell him that I loved him, to beg him not to marry my sister, but the words simply would not come. I sighed sadly as he turned and walked away.

******************************************************************
Keywords: Graduation, Forbidden Love
CC Used: Skins, the World (Anne Arbor by My Sim Realty), and Store Content

[heaven]

Round 1 is now closed for judging!!! Round 2 will be posted shortly. I literally just woke up and logged on to see my lovely new entries. Now...coffee! Then Round 2!

I just had a chance to read through everyone's stories! Congratulations on a job well done! I'm hoping to have scores for this round to you by Monday morning.

Buckley- just have to say that the dress Ava is wearing is lovely. I recognize it as store content but it looks so much better than in their previews. Now if I could just find it. :rolleyes:

[heaven]

Round 2 is now posted! Both here and on the original post.

Countdown (http://www.timeanddate.com/counters/customcounter.html?msg=Round+2+Deadline&month=11&day=02&year=2011&hour=06&min=59&sec=59&p0=770)

Round 2 – Rising Action
Round 2 should be where your audience can begin to see what the climax of the story will be. You should be building up to something whether it be struggle or joy but this chapter should help lead us there. Because you are building up more and possibly have more dialogue, you need 15 pictures and a maximum of 2,000 words.

Excerpt: Choose ONE of the following quotes.
“Burdens are for shoulders strong enough to carry them.” Margaret Mitchell, Gone With the Wind
“It was better to know the worst than to wonder.” Margaret Mitchell, Gone With the Wind

Round 2: Bonus Worth 10 points
Introduce Jude Campbell into your story. He should give your character a different version of events, help your character see things from another/his point of view. It’s not necessary for your character to agree with him and he does not have to appear after this chapter. (He can if you want him to though.) You may change his clothes/hair/traits/personality but not his overall looks; he should still be recognizable as the sim you downloaded. Make sure to get the right version for your game Ts2/Ts3!

http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/30965_111022110121Jude Campbell.jpg
ForeverCamp is my TS2 creator for Jude Campbell so a huge thank you to her!

[missroxor]

Ugh, I just realised a mistake I made :/ When I first wrote the story I had creepy guy named Gregory but I later changed it to Adrian (I'd just watched a whole bunch of Monk, lol)....I thought I'd changed them all but I've just noticed I missed one D: So to save any confusion for the judges, Grogory is Adrian...sorry.

[GigaRevival]

^Thanks for the heads up. I'm just getting to your story now... so good timing. ;)

[waterjay]

Omg omg... My motivation dropped by reading other stories! Im such a debutant comparing to the others :( Oh well I'll have to accept my early loss... but.. IM NOT GIVING UP! oh no! ;) oh and will you only post scores or also feedback so that we can improve?

[leesester]

Hi Waterjay, I am busy plodding through the scores - and yea, I will be putting a feedback for every story

/lee goggles at the work involved in judging :p .

[heaven]

Once the scores are all in, I will compile them. Totals will be posted here. Individual scores and comments from judges will be PMed privately to each contestant by me. I'd like to keep things as drama free as possible so protecting my judges' anonymity is important, hence receiving feedback and individual scores from me. :lol: I do have to say that the spirit here as been encouraging and drama-free so far so let's keep that up!

In regards to Jude Campbell, you are NOT allowed to age him. He is an adult (not young adult) but if you would like to add make up to give him some wrinkles or scars or eyebags or anything else you may. You may also change his hair color to whatever you would like.

A few improvements for round 2: to cut down on the work for judges, I would appreciate each contestant having a form under their entry with the following information:
Current Events: What did you use this chapter?
Previous Events: Here you will keep a running list of what you have already used.
Word Count:
CC Used: Allowed ____, Penalized: ____ This can be as simple as a yes/no response

Also, prior to beginning chapter 2, please post a brief summary of where you left off. Try to keep it around 100 words just for summary's sake. This will NOT count towards your maximum word allowance. For example (taking from my story on my blog (http://heavenslegacies.blogspot.com/2011/10/vengeance-chapter-1.html) ): Previously, our heroine discovered that her perfect life was just an illusion and the perfect husband she thought she married wasn't the man she knew. She blames his superiors and has run away, hopefully to collect her thoughts and decide where to go from there.

[waterjay]

lee... I know it's hard... If I'd be a judge in this contest, I'd drive crazy cuz I read all of the stories and each and every single one has something very particular and interesting... :S good luck!
@ heaven, u have AMAZING contest ideas, I wanna be your next judge lol :P

[ReyaD]

Would it be acceptable to turn Jude Campbell into a vampire/other occult?

[heaven]

Would it be acceptable to turn Jude Campbell into a vampire/other occult?

Honestly, I haven't played enough with occults to really know everything about them. If it doesn't mess with his facial sculpt and he stays an adult then I would say yes. Since you can change his skintone and other aspects, just not the sculpt or age.

[ReyaD]

*Salute* Yes ma'am. Thank you ma'am.

Changing them to vampires just makes them grey(er), brighter eyes, and makes them smoke during the day time hours. But they're still recognizable. I just wanted to make sure.

[heaven]

*Salute* Yes ma'am. Thank you ma'am.

Changing them to vampires just makes them grey(er), brighter eyes, and makes them smoke during the day time hours. But they're still recognizable. I just wanted to make sure.

I mostly wasn't sure if it affected their aging. Like if they turned as an elder, if they would stay an elder or if they would revert to a younger life stage. You never know with EA. :faceslap:

Anyway, enjoy making him all smokey and stuff. :)

[Buckley]

I just read everyone's stories, and all I have to say is WOW! Great stuff, guys! :)

Heaven- Thank you for the compliment! I *think* Ava's dress comes from the Outdoor Living stuff pack, but I'm not entirely sure of that. I would boot up my game to check, but my desktop is currently lying in pieces on my office floor. Should be fixed soon though!

[heaven]

I just read everyone's stories, and all I have to say is WOW! Great stuff, guys! :)

Heaven- Thank you for the compliment! I *think* Ava's dress comes from the Outdoor Living stuff pack, but I'm not entirely sure of that. I would boot up my game to check, but my desktop is currently lying in pieces on my office floor. Should be fixed soon though!

Oh, well I knew I had seen it before! I just got OLS so maybe that is why I thought it was from the store. I will just have to actually use it.

I hope you get the computer back together. No humpty-dumpty computers!

[Nymphy01]

Am I too late to start participating?

[Tamlyn]

To belatedly make judges' lives easier: My word count for Chapter One is 1000 words (exactly) and I completed the bonus excerpt. I'm sure you've already judged mine already because I'm posting this of course.

[GigaRevival]

^You silly contestants. ;) Thanks for giving us a heads up. I already submitted my scores, but if I'm missing something I'm sure the lovely heaven will let me know and we will get that fixed right up for you.

Everyone's stories were great this round! Seriously, pat yourselves on the back. Can't wait to see what everyone does for round 2. Spread the :luff: around!

[missroxor]

Omg omg... My motivation dropped by reading other stories! Im such a debutant comparing to the others :( Oh well I'll have to accept my early loss... but.. IM NOT GIVING UP! oh no! ;) oh and will you only post scores or also feedback so that we can improve?

This, omg yes. I've been mega busy so didn't get the chance to read all of the stories as they were coming in....but I'm kinda glad. I've read about half now, picking them randomly when I have a spare few minutes and jeez, if I'd known the standards were gonna be this high I'd probably have been too embarassed to submit mine :lol: Still, I'm in it for fun and can't wait to read the follow ups :) Thanks to the poor judges who's brains have probably turned to mush by now :p

[LadyAwesome]

I don't know if I am going to be able to finish this contest, its my bf's bday and my friends is over from oz and got a wedding. Ugh what was I thinking. I will trying get something in though. even if it isn't 15 pictures.

[ngluvjj]

Hha, I'm totally late for entering, I'm busy at some initiation program in m journalist club, al of yours story are great! I really don't have any idea for a story with those quotes! But u guys rock it!

@heaven : if u need an emergency judge, I'm more than willing to do it^^

Good luck for all of you!

[heaven]

Nymphy 01: I'm sorry but it is too late to join this time. You never know, maybe we will have a second go at this after awhile! You're more than welcome to lurk and encourage the contestants though. :)

Ladywesome: Please, please, you can do it! Or I hope you can fit it into your busy schedule. We want more! :D

Ngluvjj: I think we're good on judges. But thank you for the offer. Journalist club sounds like a lot of fun!

[Nymphy01]

Dang. *throws away story*

Everyones stories are great!

-Shhh: Your main character is absolutely adorable! I love her purple hair.

-ReyaD: Vampires. They always make for the perfect story ^-^ And I love your cliff hanger!

-WaterJay: Such drama. [: I LOVE IT

-blackivy: I like how different yours is to everyones!

-Myshia: Ooh, I love the way you write! And I love how I can picture everything in my head, even without the pictures!

-LadyAwesome: B-b-but they were so happy! D: I love your little twist. [:

-Tamyln: I love the mutant!!

-Elexis: That first shot, stunning view! And I love the rest of 'em too.

-Whitewaterwood: Yay, a sims 2 entrant! :D Great story, and I love your main character.

-Morphead: I like the uniqueness in your writing.

-Missroxor: I LOVE YOUR STORY! :D And the pictures are gorgeous

-Buckley: I can totally tell the theme your going for, great story! [:

Good job guys!

[ReyaD]

Thank you for the compliment, Nymphy01. <3 It made me smile. Argh I'm sick with a sinus cold and have three midterms this week. I may just end up posting my story 30 minutes before the cut off time.

Stupid school. Always getting in the way of sims.

[Nymphy01]

I think I'll go along with the story, but not officially be in the contest.
I'd still love feedback on my story, so I'll post it here - in the sims stories section.
I'll follow all the rules and such, just as everyone else. [: I like my story a lot, and didn't want to just throw it out.

[GigaRevival]

Random: Ooh... congratulations heaven on making moderator. *applauds*

Back on topic: Sorry you didn't make the deadline Nymphy. : ( It would have been nice to have another contestant (MOAR STORIES THE BETTER!); but I'm sure you'll get some feedback posting in the sims stories forum (sims creativity? I don't know what I'm talking about). Good luck!

Looking forward to Round numero dos! I'll be reading everyone's stories instead of the novel I'm *supposed* to be reading for my midterm... much more interesting than that old stooopid book anyhow. ;)

[ReyaD]

What book Giga? Chances are I've read it. I can give you a summary.

[heaven]

Thank you for the compliment, Nymphy01. <3 It made me smile. Argh I'm sick with a sinus cold and have three midterms this week. I may just end up posting my story 30 minutes before the cut off time.

Stupid school. Always getting in the way of sims.

I know! Why can't people understand the priorities here? Sims first! :lol:

I think I'll go along with the story, but not officially be in the contest.
I'd still love feedback on my story, so I'll post it here - in the sims stories section.
I'll follow all the rules and such, just as everyone else. [: I like my story a lot, and didn't want to just throw it out.

Have fun with it! I too am following along with the rules/deadlines and posting on my blog. I think it's a fun way to challenge yourself creatively.

[GigaRevival]

What book Giga? Chances are I've read it. I can give you a summary.

I've already read it as well. It's Immodest Acts (more of a historical overview... so I guess calling it a novel is a bit of a stretch), but I need to re-read it to get an idea of what the heck I'm supposed to be writing about. Pewp. I just have absolutely no motivation. :rolleyes:

So instead, I'm re-reading everyone's entries even though my paper is due by midnight. :faceslap:

I should get on that.

[ReyaD]

I have a midterm worth 30% in 25 hours... >_> I refuse to study for it. Stupid quants.

RELATIVE TO THE TOPIC: Because instead I'm working on the outline for round 2. I expected the photo limit to be around 5 so Heaven totally threw me for a loop when she announced 15 xD.

[GigaRevival]

^Ha. We should set up a "motivation" group. We seem to be suffering of lazy-itis (at least when it comes to school).
I'll bring the cookies... you bring the motivation. Deal? :jest:

I'm excited for the longer entries... it will give you peeps more development room as well. Hurrah! Also, more distraction for me. Double Hurrah!!

[Elexis]

Personally I think 15 pics and 2000 words is too much. We have so little time, until Friday.
The first chapter took me about 4 days and I have 2 exams this week so I hardly think I'll be able to finish chapter 2.
Any chances for reducing pic count? :blink:

[GigaRevival]

Depending on your region, I believe it cuts off on Saturday. But perhaps we can extend it for this round to Sunday so you have an extra day? It's up to heaven though; perhaps it would be easier to reduce word/pic requirements. We can get a general consensus from you contestants at least and see what heaven's opinion is.

[heaven]

Seems like this is a bad week for contests with lots of exams going on! Sorry for those that feel that time has been shorted. The original plan was that every round be a week but once I got the go ahead to add in Sims 2, half the round had passed so I extended it by another week. So those of you who were already working on the first round got a bit of an extension by proxy.

Would a minimum of 10 pictures but UP TO 15 pictures be agreeable? Same with words: minimum of say 1,200 but NO MORE than 2,000? That should still give everyone the time to develop more without throwing our timeline off.

[ReyaD]

That would actually be perfect! Thanks Heaven.

[leesester]

also,sorry for the delay on the results being posted - I was very slow. However, I have finally handed the scores in and hopefully heaven can do her Excel magic and we will have the results soon.

[heaven]

We have scores! Almost an entire day in advance! Instead of sending you PMs, since there are only 12 of you, I am going to post the overall score in the open and then individual breakdown and comments in a spoiler broken down by contestant. Also, the comments have been randomly entered so you can't figure out who is who. So don't try! :p

Out of a possible 300: Bonuses have been added in so perfect scores would be 310/300

Shhh: 215
ReyaD: 292
waterjay: 282
blackivy: 274
Myshia: 208.5
LadyAwesome: 292
Tamlyn: 300
Elexis: 271
whitewaterwood: 261
Morphead: 200.5
missroxor: 243.5
Buckley: 297


Shhh
Creativity = 40,Scene = 30,Flow = 20,Rules = 5,CC = 5,Total = 100,Bonus = 10,OVERALL TOTAL
35,26,16,3,0,80,0,80
28,17,14,4,0,63,0,63
30,23,10,4,5,72,0,72
Your story was below the required picture count so I had to deduct points for that. You also forgot a few words here and there that jarred the flow a bit, and I believe the ear sliders count toward the CC points.

I think Shh is new to story telling - the characters need a little more rounding out, but the pictures do show a progressive story - they are followable. The flow of the story is jerky - its as if there is a page missing or something - we go from the parents house to being in an alleyway with no explanation. I was baffled. Some words are missing here and there - more proof reading needed next time.


1 Point deducted for lack of pictures i only counted 6 and requirement was 10. This was a good start but it left me with a lot of conflicted opinions, such as why is she so sure it was humans when humans and elves live in peace? What else as a reader did i need to be let in on to understand her train of thought? I feel like perhaps you needed to set up the world within your story for me more, like why are there elves? Why do they live among humans and what issues has this caused for them historically? The description of the part where she is homeless was very good, but why was she homeless? Why was she not involved in her parents funeral? I feel like you need to consider your main characters personality more to give readers a better understanding of why she thinks and acts the way she does as at the moment i don't feel like i know her so it makes it harder for me to sympathise with her. There are some great themes and ideas in here and i look forward to seeing you expand on them.

I think this is a good start. I like that you went with a little fantasy. I am curious why she immediately assumes humans did it as she clearly states that humans and elves have been living in peace for quite awhile. More pictures would have been nice as well as better lighting in them. There are some places where you skip from past tense to present tense which was a little confusing. Great first start though.


ReyaD
Creativity = 40,Scene = 30,Flow = 20,Rules = 5,CC = 5,Total = 100,Bonus = 10,OVERALL TOTAL
35,30,19,5,5,94,10,104
30,19,18,5,5,77,10,87
34,29,20,5,5,93,8,101
First glance…tell me about that birthmark! Why did one fade, why does it mean being promised? Tell me the rules!!! I really liked where you went with this though. I like her spirit and her father’s bravery. Your use of the excerpts was flawless and your pictures did a fantastic job of setting up the scenes. I think you did a great job of conveying the scenes in under the minimum words as well. I look forward to where this goes.

Nicely set up and an interesting premise for a story. I wanted more information on the vampire mark, like i presume it means she is chosen to marry a vamp because of it but why does this happen? Why is this the way your world works? However this is also a positive as i want to know more, maybe i will have my questions answered at a later point. I like Jessie, she seems rebellious and even though she likes Tyler and is aware of the consequences she turns him down, i like her style! Great start, nice work!

I REALLY liked how she has tied this into the sims3 universe - mixologists and vampire marks - and her staging is excellent too - very natural. Good story line and good characterisation. The story is not exactly ORIGINAL - its a coming of age story - but if its good enough for the likes of Ernest Hemingway, Scott Fitzgerald and Tenessee Williams its good enough for me I am guessing at the events being twins - and marriage?Paranormal character? I think the FIRST bonus was really in the flow - the second SLIGHTLY less so - it felt like it was "propped in" a bit - so I gave it an 8.



waterjay
Creativity = 40,Scene = 30,Flow = 20,Rules = 5,CC = 5,Total = 100,Bonus = 10,OVERALL TOTAL
37,28,17,5,5,92,10,102
30,22,18,5,5,80,10,90
31,26,16,4,5,82,8,90
Waterjay went over the allowed limit for words - that may explain the rather abrupt ending. I do like that it is a cliffhanger ending though. It did jar a bit that they would sit on a cafe terrace and ask about what must be a fairly secret thing - like defeating the Emperor of Evil. Good use of flashbacks and I did like the circle of candles shot - very good idea. Achille is not very rounded as yet, despite him looking to be a major character. The two bonuses did seem a BIT propped in - the first quote - the father one - is a hard one to fit into a story due to the tense being very strongly defined in the quote, but it really did seem forced. The second bonus was better.

No major mistakes here except the occasional odd word-usage (which falls under grammar, so I didn’t deduct any points).

I like the way this starts, with a bit of mystery and intrigue, leaving the readers wondering why the characters are frightened. Your use of quotes is good though I feel they could have been blended a bit better. Also, I think it was quite obvious that witch was a paranormal character so bolding that and putting it in as you did wasn’t necessary. I’m curious to find out a bit of history as to what happened in the past.

I felt kinda thrown right in with this story, as a reader you asked us to take a lot on board right away but it worked. I didn't fully get all the themes right off but i knew enough, there is a problem and they need to stop it! I can only imagine at present what the problem is and how they will solve it but thats exactly where i should be and what i want to be wondering because i certainly want to find out the answers! I like Marysa although little was given away about her past yet she seems conflicted and has great depths that can be built on. Great start, intriguing and left me wanting more.



blackivy
Creativity = 40,Scene = 30,Flow = 20,Rules = 5,CC = 5,Total = 100,Bonus = 10,OVERALL TOTAL
33,30,20,5,0,88,10,98
28,21,18,5,0,72,10,82
34,28,17,5,0,84,10,94
I’m unfamiliar with TS2 CC, so you need to be a bit more detailed with your CC usage. Just listing hair/eyes/what-have-you is fine (as in, you don’t need to include the name and creator). For that, I deducted points since I wasn’t sure.

Interesting and very different to other entries. You chose a simple premise and storyline which you executed very well. This issues brought up are made all the more huge by the fact that your main character is a child. Her thoughts and feelings were well explained however i don't feel like i'm fully in her head just yet but i'm on her side and i'm certain that as the plot unfolds i will grow to care about her more and more. Great start interested to see where it leads.

I really liked the pictures in this one - the opening paragraph is intriguing, but I am not really convinced on the bravest man who ever lived. I gave the story a high score for originality as I have not got the foggiest where blackivy is going with it There could have been a bit more characterisation in the subsidiary characters - Jack is not really coming across as believeable right now - maybe a little of the extra word count could have been used for that. Overall, very enjoyable and I thought the pictures were really well setup, I could see the story move.

I think you did a great job setting the scenes for this. I liked that it seemed like she was recounting history for us, from a more mature point of view but we could still understand her feelings about her mother’s betrayal. I noticed that you were a bit under the word limit, and although that is allowed, I feel you could have used that to flesh out your story a bit.


Myshia
Creativity = 40,Scene = 30,Flow = 20,Rules = 5,CC = 5,Total = 100,Bonus = 10,OVERALL TOTAL
33,9,18,2.5,5,67.5,4,71.5
32,10,15,4,5,66,10,76
30,7,10,1,5,53,8,61
For not having screenshots, you did a good job of setting scenes. There was some curiosity as to what had happened to the house/disappearances that I am hoping will be obvious in upcoming chapters but for now it left me a little confused. Also, it took me a minute to realize that the character was a young boy. Biggest recommendation is to try to be consistent between first and third person. You started with one and ended with the other. Otherwise, great start. I look forward to seeing this story with pictures!

Of course this one got hit hard by there being no pictures. The story has a lot of potential and there is indication of an exciting story here (mysterious hintings) with the the time frame being established fairly well. I marked the flow down a lot as there was a sudden swap from third to first person (to fit in the quote I think) and that was hard to get over. I would love to see the pictures for this - I think it will be a CC extravanganza but probably worth it.

There’s no pictures, but you still managed to set up your scene well; so I gave you partial points. You restructured the wording of the bonus quote, so I deducted points (I gave you partial for at least including it). And since there were no pictures, there was no CC involved so I gave you full for that.

Very well written yet confusing in places. I am uncertain of the setting and the main character, what befell him before the story started? Is the family who left his family? Why was he living outside? The setting for the world was good it felt very Dickensian to me which i enjoyed but i was left with too many questions about him and the story to become fully invested in the story just yet. You write beautifully though and i hope to read more of your work and perhaps adding pictures will help me to become immersed in this world you have created.


LadyAwesome
Creativity = 40,Scene = 30,Flow = 20,Rules = 5,CC = 5,Total = 100,Bonus = 10,OVERALL TOTAL
34,30,17,5,5,91,10,101
34,24,19,5,5,87,10,97
32,28,14,5,5,84,10,94
Your story felt a bit random at times, which messed with the flow a little (particularly when you switched between first and third person; that didn’t give the story consistency perspective-wise). Everything else was lovely.

The pictures in this one are so fun and spontaneous-looking, and you can see the story line moving along in the pictures, it was fun to read but there was a bit of jumping of tense which threw me off a bit. A fun entry and good work on the no cc - though those windows in the breakfast parlour look remarkably like the AL windows converted - I didn't know if they were CC or not, If so, no biggy as they are not really in the story

Loved it! There were some great lines in this which really made me smile. I love how its written from a childs perspective and the relationship between the twins was well described it really came to life for me. I could really feel how Aiden feels for Elyssa, its heart breaking and amazing how he so obviously admires her. And man that twist was killer! Brilliant entry looking forward to some more.

Poor Elyssa. I feel for her. I do suggest keeping with the tense (you skipped into third rather randomly at one point) but otherwise great. I especially liked finding out that he is dead. It makes me guess at where you are going with the story? Will his haunting/return be a paranormal character entry? Keeping your readers guessing is always a good thing!


Tamlyn
Creativity = 40,Scene = 30,Flow = 20,Rules = 5,CC = 5,Total = 100,Bonus = 10,OVERALL TOTAL
37,30,18,5,5,95,10,105
30,23,16,5,5,79,10,89
37,30,20,4,5,96,10,106
I loved the opening scene it introduced us very well to the world and charcters, i feel i know just enough about whats going on in general to be both interested and keen for more. Sofie is a wonderful lead charcacter she seems bitter yet almost accepting of her lot in life, like this is just how it is and she deals with it. But now she is starting to take off the blindfold and question her authority figures. I like that she thinks for herself and i think this will become a very interesting story.

I really love this opening scene. With the pictures and descriptions, it came alive for me. Immunity to what? Tell me!!! I really like how your character is struggling not just with outside forces but more of an internal struggle; against her beliefs, her feelings toward her father, and even her feelings toward herself. Nice work at being at EXACTLY 1,000.

Crumbs. I don't know what to say - this one is so GOOD. The pics - the phrasing - the flow - the setting. It's a good job she mangled the first quote a little bit and went over word count a little as otherwise I would have had to give a perfect score.


Elexis
Creativity = 40,Scene = 30,Flow = 20,Rules = 5,CC = 5,Total = 100,Bonus = 10,OVERALL TOTAL
33,30,20,3,5,91,0,91
32,30,19,5,5,91,0,91
34,29,18,3,5,89,0,89
What stunning pics - I may even install LateNight based on those . They tell the story well, and I like the two big entry and exit shots. They bracket the story nicely - like cinematic cut-scenes in a game - very well done. It's a classic storyline and well executed though the main character is looking a little stereotypical. VERY over on the word count but I thought that the last paragraph was very good with some moral questions being raised.

First, what gorgeous screenshots. I sat here for a few minutes just drooling over your graphics. I want! You did go over the maximum word allowance and changed the excerpt a bit so try to watch for that in future rounds. The plot is good. It is a little ‘obvious’ at the moment, which makes me wonder what twists you might be using. I can see something already because I feel that you are foreshadowing a not-so-happy ending. Good job so far!

You changed the wording of the quote, so I deducted points in the rules. I guess this would technically count as grammar (so no points were deducted for this in particular), but your tenses weren’t consistent throughout your story so the flow was a bit off. Went a bit over the word maximum.

Okay so after i'd finished humming the knight rider theme tune i became completely engrossed in this story! The picture quality and sims you created were breath taking. Han is a great, great character, i love him! Ok so yes the plot line has been done before but the way you wove the story is so original because he knows that his revenge won't bring him what he needs, he knows it will destroy him too but he still does it. Han is not some cliched i will avenge my parents stallone style hero he's flawed and dark and knows he is losing a part of himself along the path he takes. And this line "The sun will rise soon and he needs to hide his dark side from the rest of the world." Perfection!


whitewaterwood
Creativity = 40,Scene = 30,Flow = 20,Rules = 5,CC = 5,Total = 100,Bonus = 10,OVERALL TOTAL
33,30,20,4,0,87,0,87
34,30,19,5,0,88,0,88
36,28,18,4,0,86,0,86
I’m unfamiliar with TS2 CC so if you could give a vague listing (look at other contestant entries) for round 2, that would really help out. Because of this, I docked points. Went a bit over the word maximum.

Amazing pictures and wonderful writing. I loved the main characters reactions to the funeral, so well thought out i felt instantly on her side and as though i knew her. Yes she hates her father but did she really know him? I love this conflict for her. She is intrigued by Colton's feelings about their Dad but i think deep down she really wants to hate him more than she actually does. Brilliant use of the quote line and the scene at the grave with the almost fight, amazing i truly loved it. I really love Theadora shes a fascinating character and i want much much more of this!

I really love the duality of the character’s father. It really gives a good view to the old adage: two sides to every story. I also like how she is almost fighting with herself. She wants to know what Colton has to say but meets his words with utter resistance and anger and then fighting again when she feels bad about her behavior. I feel as though I understand her and love that this seems to be an internal struggle. Your take on the excerpt was unexpected, in a good way. You did go over the max allowed words but I think, with some minor editing, you could have gotten it in shape so keep this in mind for next time.

Heh. I LOVED the way WWW got the quote in - it was a really clever and smart use of opposing view points. Her sense of scene is excellent too, and the setting was really good - an excellent use of one lot and some well chosen props. The chapter is ending a little awkwardly - but not enough to really jar. A minus of one point on the rules for 1070 words, I did like her style of writing, the dialogue is well captured.


Morphead
Creativity = 40,Scene = 30,Flow = 20,Rules = 5,CC = 5,Total = 100,Bonus = 10,OVERALL TOTAL
33,9,19,2.5,5,68.5,0,68.5
34,10,17,5,5,71,0,71
31,6,18,1,5,61,0,61
I really enjoyed the story compared to the script version, especially. Your writing and ability to set the scene even without pictures was great. I feel that the father was more cunning than anyone gave him credit for but I do wish to know more about your main character. I don’t know if it was your intention but he comes across as rather detached from the entire situation. Interested to know more about the missing brother as now there is a rush to find him.

I gave full points for no CC, seeing as there wasn’t any. Went a bit over the word maximum and since there were no pictures I deducted points. However, you still managed to set up a good scene despite missing pictures, so I gave partial points.

Oh no - no pictures. Although I appreciate the "storyboard" it's still not possible to give picture marks. The scene is well set - the story flows well, though I had a brief moment on the opening where I was a shade confused. Its very "Days of our lives" and soap opera style and I think that it is a neat idea to do a pastiche like this. I laughed at the FreshPrince reference but I did think that it spoiled the mood setting a bit. I think that Morphead has the story telling skills to play this kind of storyline straight - don't be shy I hope to see the next chapter (with pics), and I like the cliffhanger ending.

Some great themes in this i like the missing brother angle particularly in light of the fathers death and how the missing bro gets the business thereby stumping the bad guy. I think i would have liked to get to know Kawlin more, like i get that he/she wants revenge, albeit he/she does not know who to seek it from, but how does Kawlin feel about the death of Dad on a personal level? What was the relationship with the brother like? Great set up though and i'm looking forward to reading some more of this. Missing some points here due to lack of pictures and i must say it flowed much better when not in a script form so i marked based on this.


missroxor
Creativity = 40,Scene = 30,Flow = 20,Rules = 5,CC = 5,Total = 100,Bonus = 10,OVERALL TOTAL
38.5,30,20,4,0,92.5,0,92.5
30,22,15,5,0,72,0,72
31,28,18,2,0,79,0,79
This is a great idea - I loved the creativity of the plane crash shot and all the sets. Great scene setting. I have to say that I think being shipwrecked on a desert island is kind of stretching the homeless event.

Went a bit over word the word maximum; usage of CC.

Great use of pictures here, i bet it took up a lot of time? This story has so much potential you have set it up well but left it quite open in terms of how little we really know about the location it is set in and the characters in it so it might fare you well in later rounds if the requirements are rigid. Having said that i feel like i don't know any of the characters at all yet so i find it tough to root for them just yet, but you fulfilled the requirements for the first chapter and i do look forward to seeing where this goes, nice job!

A shipwrecked theme. Very different than the others which immediately struck my interest. I like your scenes and use of props. I do feel that your death scene/excerpt was a little unemotional regarding the incident. It felt too calm for what I am sure would have been chaos. Perhaps if she had felt nauseous or repulsed, it would have better explained why her father was brave and the better person to be there. However, the woman lying with her dead husband and bringing him to the shelter made up for it a bit. I’m curious about both boys and wonder which (or both) will turn out to be the untrustworthy one.


Buckley
Creativity = 40,Scene = 30,Flow = 20,Rules = 5,CC = 5,Total = 100,Bonus = 10,OVERALL TOTAL
34,30,20,4,5,93,10,103
30,24,17,5,5,81,10,91
35,28,20,5,5,93,10,103
Went a bit over the word maximum

Well set up and thought out. A simple plot line, a love triangle but the family element sets it apart well and i like how it's told from the overlooked sisters perspective rather than the more popular one. Aunt Mildred's scene made me laugh, she reminds me of so many relatives of mine and also i liked how you worked the two quotes in here both were fittingly placed and well explained. The main character is intriguing, she's not afraid to be herself depspite the comparisons to her sister and i think she'll make a great hero for your story.

In at the last - and worth the wait I really liked Buckleys story - the pictures are well staged and we can follow the story. The quotes are well used and I already hate Ava and I hope our protagonist gets her man

Your scenes and screenshots really set everything up beautifully. (That graphics card is lovely!) Your characters are also very believable. The first word to me almost hints at a foreshadowing. Will he have a tryst with her? If so, he’s not really flawless. But she loves him so could it be so wrong? I like the dilemma we are already being presented with. Honestly, my favorite character though is Milly. She made me laugh. I like that you took this in the direction of a love story. Lovely set up and fantastic first chapter.


Stay tuned for some information about the next round's scoring system.

[heaven]

Okay, now that scores are up (so you know that this didn't take effect until Round 2), the judges and I have developed a more in depth scoring system. This will help you focus on some areas rather than just trying to improve on the vague "creativity" or "scene" sections. See pretty new system below. Again, this was not in effect for the scores just posted but hopefully it will help for upcoming rounds. Also, notice that if you do not include the entry form with information, you will be docked in the Rules section.

1. CREATIVITY 40 points overall:
Originality of story 10 points: Is your story unique and interesting? If it is a specific archetype do you use an unexpected twist?
Use of excerpt 10 points: Is your excerpt expected? Does it blend in with the story or is it plopped randomly in?
Development of character 10 points: Are your characters flat, one sided sims or realistic and multi-faceted? Do they have believable reactions/dialogue? Are the extraneous characters fluff or do they add to the story?
Events 10 points: Do the events you choose work well with the overall plot? Are the two themes tied together well? Do they make sense to be used together?

2. SCENES 30 points overall:
# of pictures 10 points: Did you have the correct number of pictures for the round?
Mood, storyline 10 points: Did your words mentally set a stage for us? Did the use of descriptive words help us “feel” the scene?
Use of props/staging 10 points: Did you choose appropriate scenes/props for the mood you were going for? If you are doing medieval, did you have a TV in the background? Are your angles relevant to the specific scene they are portraying?

3. FLOW 20 points: Does the story flow cohesively from one point to the next? Are your rounds consistent with each other?

4. RULE ADHERENCE 5 points: Were the events and excerpt included in your entry? Did you use photoshop? Are your word limits in line with what is stated each round? Did you use pay content? Did you use the entry form? (It is up to each judge to determine how much to penalize if a contestant goes over the word max up to a max of 5 points)

5. CC 5 points: Exclusion of CC makes creators really think and be creative with what is in game. Therefore, contestants will receive 5 points if no CC is used and 0 points if any is used. You MUST state if you used CC at the bottom of your entry. If you do not, it will be assumed that it has been used. Note: Custom worlds, poses, and store content does not count as CC.
AMENDMENT to CC RULE: Skin/hair/eyes can be used without penalty but please be sure to let judges know that you used them. Other CC, including build/buy content or clothes/accessories will count towards the points. For contestants with TS2, recolors for Maxis objects are also allowed and will not be counted as CC.

6. BONUS 10 points: Did your use of the bonus content really help move your story along? If so, how well? Was it used in an expected way? (Judges may award between 0 for no use at all and 10 for well incorporated, creative use of bonus)

[LadyAwesome]

clearly me and Reya have a personal compition going on now lol

[ReyaD]

clearly me and Reya have a personal compition going on now lol

*Hat -> Floor*

It's on, Awesome.

The comments were pretty much what I thought they would be with one or two things that made me go "Oooh. Right." so they were helpful. And thank you to the judges for their criticism.

[heaven]

I'd like to thank one of my contestants for pointing out that using the quotes exactly as they are presented wasn't listed in the main rules. I know we discussed it a couple of times but I will edit the main post to reflect this as well to avoid confusion in later rounds.

Also, now it's a bit easier for you to see how the bonus round can affect your score. Of course, it's not mandatory but...:lol:

[Shhh]

Well done Heavan on becoming a mod! Thanks for the advice and feedback.

[Elexis]

Not what I expected at all :D Looking forward to see everyone's sequels :)
However, I don't think I'll be able to compete further, I have such a busy week and I don't want to disfigure my story :faceslap:

[heaven]

Not what I expected at all :D Looking forward to see everyone's sequels :)
However, I don't think I'll be able to compete further, I have such a busy week and I don't want to disfigure my story :faceslap:

Well, I hope that you are able to find the time. I, for one, was looking forward to finding out what exactly will become of Han, especially if he is able to assassinate the emperor! Besides, we need more drool-worthy pictures! Good luck with your week and we'll keep our fingers crossed that you can find time!

[Elexis]

Well, I hope that you are able to find the time. I, for one, was looking forward to finding out what exactly will become of Han, especially if he is able to assassinate the emperor! Besides, we need more drool-worthy pictures! Good luck with your week and we'll keep our fingers crossed that you can find time!

Ha ha, thank you :D
Actually it is a DRAMA (lol) :lol: An old unpublished story, a bright one (bigger lol) :wtf:

[leesester]

Awww, I really hope everybody can do the next rounds - I had a lot of fun reading the stories and I wanna know how they turn out. Do not leave a fish in limbo. 'Twould be cruel.

[heaven]

Everyone listen up. This is IMPORTANT. After consulting with my judges (really guys, you owe them :lol: ) we have decided to extend ALL rounds to 10 days instead of 7. This will give everyone a chance to work on weekends. The judges will have to work on some weekdays to get your scoring in for you so you should definitely thank them.

/me hands out rounds to her judges. :Pint:

What does this mean for you? More time to work on every round. What does that mean for this round? It's not due until November 2nd instead of the 29th. What else does this mean? I am very likely not to grant future extensions unless there are extreme mitigating circumstances. So enjoy and take the time to do a great job.

Countdowns have been changed to reflect this. And just for pokes and giggles here is another one.

New Countdown (http://www.timeanddate.com/counters/customcounter.html?msg=Round+2+Deadline&month=11&day=02&year=2011&hour=06&min=59&sec=59&p0=770)

[ReyaD]

I would just like the judges to know Nov. 2 is my birthday. : ) That was a very nice gift you gave me. I truly appreciate it.

And Heaven of course. You're the best <3. Big hugs to you from all us contestants.

[GigaRevival]

You're welcome guys. Sheesh. Tooootally kidding. I hope the extension helps everyone out and I can't wait to read the continuation of your guys'/gals' stories! :giggler:

As always, good luck!

Edit: Happy early birthday Cece. :bunny:

[LadyAwesome]

ps I love you all. and Heaven, I just realized your name was different too hahaha noob.

I take it back, I don't love you anymore. I was not going to loose my bonus. but then I had to have a patched game. so patch my game and now its borked!

[heaven]

ps I love you all. and Heaven, I just realized your name was different too hahaha noob.

I take it back, I don't love you anymore. I was not going to loose my bonus. but then I had to have a patched game. so patch my game and now its borked!

No, no you love me anyway! I know it. Yay for an increased deadline. Silly Pets messing up a lot of games! I hope it will be solved!

[waterjay]

I loved all the constructive criticism I received. I really thank you guys, and I would really apreciate if you'd tell me the odd word usage, I could refrain from doing the mistake at school, ( I always try to take benefit from what I do :P ) and if you want to keep the Judge's privacy, heaven could tell me :) (I think so xD). Oh and regarding the word count, I checked on an online program ( you copy paste what you wrote) and it says how many words there are. I got 996, without counting "Chapter 1: New born, New Troubles". I know that getting an addtional point won't really affect my overall, but I would like to know if the words in the title are counted as words. Thank you :) I'm enjoying this sooo much!

[Buckley]

Yay for the new deadline! Thanks judges! My birthday's on November 3, so I can get my entry in and then celebrate. Perfect! :)

[leesester]

I loved all the constructive criticism I received. I really thank you guys, and I would really apreciate if you'd tell me the odd word usage, I could refrain from doing the mistake at school, ( I always try to take benefit from what I do :P ) and if you want to keep the Judge's privacy, heaven could tell me :) (I think so xD). Oh and regarding the word count, I checked on an online program ( you copy paste what you wrote) and it says how many words there are. I got 996, without counting "Chapter 1: New born, New Troubles". I know that getting an addtional point won't really affect my overall, but I would like to know if the words in the title are counted as words. Thank you :) I'm enjoying this sooo much!

I also used an online word program - same thing - and for me your count came in at 1032.

http://www.wordcounttool.com/

Of course, it is very hard to copy paste ok with all the pictures so I am sorry if I messed up the count(s). Maybe its just not a very good counter?

But as of next round you guys put word count in yourselves and yea, I am a trusting fish :)

[waterjay]

I also used an online word program - same thing - and for me your count came in at 1032.

http://www.wordcounttool.com/

Of course, it is very hard to copy paste ok with all the pictures so I am sorry if I messed up the count(s). Maybe its just not a very good counter?

But as of next round you guys put word count in yourselves and yea, I am a trusting fish :)

Thank you for your reply! :) Well I did some research and found out that my word counter sucks... I think the right number of words is the one you listed, so I'm really sorry. I always talk too much apparently :( lol

[ReyaD]

Thank you for your reply! :) Well I did some research and found out that my word counter sucks... I think the right number of words is the one you listed, so I'm really sorry. I always talk too much apparently :( lol

*Pat pat* I do the same thing. In my writing classes I'm the only one who ever gets a maximum word count on assignments. Otherwise I'll write 10 pages for a 3 page assignment. It's why I'm doing this contest, to challenge myself with a short story.

[heaven]

*Pat pat* I do the same thing. In my writing classes I'm the only one who ever gets a maximum word count on assignments. Otherwise I'll write 10 pages for a 3 page assignment. It's why I'm doing this contest, to challenge myself with a short story.

I, too, know what you mean. I had an assignment for a psych class that was supposed to be a 1 page discussion. Mine ended up being 3 or 4. My story for this was also over and I had to go back and cut words out and rearrange things. :faceslap:

[waterjay]

Guys sorry, I really don't want you to get this the wrong way, but the number of words decreases significally on this word counter http://allworldphone.com/count-words-characters.htm
which one should we trust for further times? Heaven can you set a specific word counting site that we must follow? thank you :) Cuz this will probably be causing issues ... Hope you don't get mad at me for bringing up this again xD

[leesester]

Yes - I already made that suggestion to heaven - like you, I don't have a word counting thing on my PC - lets see what heaven comes up with.

[heaven]

Okay, I have no idea what the difference is between Word and some of these word counting websites. Sometimes they are off by a little, sometimes a LOT. I found one that matches Word. I tested pretty much everyone's entry (I might have skipped one or two) but it only gave me a different number once, which was off by about 3 words. So, from now on, use either Microsoft Word, if you have it, or Word Counter (http://wordcountertool.com/). This is for future rounds so everyone can be standardized. Hopefully this helps!!!

/me scurries off to update main page

[waterjay]

Okay, I have no idea what the difference is between Word and some of these word counting websites. Sometimes they are off by a little, sometimes a LOT. I found one that matches Word. I tested pretty much everyone's entry (I might have skipped one or two) but it only gave me a different number once, which was off by about 3 words. So, from now on, use either Microsoft Word, if you have it, or Word Counter (http://wordcountertool.com/). This is for future rounds so everyone can be standardized. Hopefully this helps!!!

/me scurries off to update main page

Thank You Heaven! :) I used both word and the counter tool you provided, and they both gave me 997 words for my first entry! :D I'm glad I didn't pass the limit, phew! By the way, just to know cuz I always get really close to the limit, are the words in the title counted? :) Thank you again xD

[leesester]

/lee woggles an eyebrow in despair....

if heaven wants to give back the one point I deducted for the word count then that is cool by me :)

[waterjay]

/lee woggles an eyebrow in despair....

if heaven wants to give back the one point I deducted for the word count then that is cool by me :)

Trust me lee, I didn't do all this to get 1 point, I just thougt it would be good to point out the fact that word counters aren't very accurate, which would maybe allow others to get down better with their stories :) Thank you though, and apologize again for bringing this up. :)

[leesester]

WATERJAY!!! Enough already :p .

We agreed to use the One Word Counter to Rule Them All. See the post above. (The one you tested).

Now go get to it writing the next chapter :)

[Tamlyn]

First time I've made it to the forums in days! Thanks judges for the feedback - it's helpful to see your perspective on character and the questions you're left with.

Also very, very, very big thanks for the extension. I have so much stuff due at the moment creating the story is giving me a much needed distraction, but more time always helps.

[heaven]

I trust my judges and if they used a different counter than I did, their deductions stick. Especially since we didn't have a standardized counter in play before hand. This really won't affect your scores and won't be a game changer by any means. Like I said from now on we'll have that in place so you can count with it or Word since both give back the same numbers.

[waterjay]

Previously, Marysa and Achille found out that darkness came to light along with many troubles. Realizing that their lives were in danger, they decided to form an order of people wielding paranormal powers in order to stop the Emperor of Evil before he could do any damage. However, their recruiting didn’t go as expected, with Dan (an old friend of theirs) rejecting them, and Marysa’s telepathic calls being unanswered. Seeing Marysa falling into a deep depression, Achille tried persuading Layla, another old friend of theirs, to join them. Layla accepted, leaving Achille surprised.

_____________________________________________

Chapter 2: "Our Troubles Have Only Begun"

http://i1221.photobucket.com/albums/dd465/waterjay/Screenshot-178.jpg
….
Marysa woke up struggling, and headed to the kitchen. On her way downstairs, all kinds of thoughts started to cross her mind, putting her in a more uncomfortable situation. She convinced herself to stop thinking and take action before it was too late. She prepared her coffee, and approached the window with the intention to contemplate the beautiful view, but all she succeeded in was to trick herself to fall again into thousands and thousands of thoughts.

http://i1221.photobucket.com/albums/dd465/waterjay/Screenshot-180.jpg
“Mary!”… Marysa reacted to that shout jumping. As soon as she turned her back to see where the scream came from, she started yelling “ Layla! Oh my goodness you scared the hell out of me!! Don’t you ever do that again!! And how many times should I tell you that my name is Marysa and not Mary?! And who the hell letted you….”
“ I letted her in” interrupted Achille.
“Wow thank you Achille! Her high pitch voice was starting to reach deeply into my brain and destroy my ears! Hehe!”
“You never change Layla, do you?” ironically asked Marysa. She proceeded, “it’s good to see you however. I would’ve never thought you would’ve come to help us…”
“Yeah yeah, enough with that. Today I’m having launch at your place, isn’t that great!!?”
“We don’t have groceries…” discretely replied Marysa.
“Well let’s go buy some!” suggested Achille. They all agreed and headed out to the market, after the witch had quit her pajamas and dressed up properly.

http://i1221.photobucket.com/albums/dd465/waterjay/Screenshot-181.jpg
On their way, Layla was too busy talking and chatting with Achille, that she didn’t look in front of her. Marysa warned her, but before she could even take into consideration her warnings, she had already bumped into a hard-looking man. “Excuse me ma’am”, he whispered. Layla raised her head to see who the owner of this calm voice was. Her eyes spread wide, and she screamed “Jude Campbell?! IS THAT YOU!?”

http://i1221.photobucket.com/albums/dd465/waterjay/Screenshot-182.jpg
“JUDE?!” added Marysa with a loud tone. Keeping his calm attitude, Jude asked “Ehm… Am I missing something? Do I know you ladies?”
“How can you forget them?!” questioned Achille. “Here are in front of you Marysa Amaylis and Layla Kafisha.”
“No way!” he replied with surprise. “Oh my God! And you must be Achille I imagine! It’s been soooo long guys! Like how many years? Eleven?!”
“Yes!” confirmed Marysa. “I can’t forget the good old times when we used to go together at the sorcerer’s academy!”
“Wow I can’t forget those times neither!”. And they went on bringing up old memories… At this point, Marysa felt in obligation to invite him at launch, an invitation that he didn’t refuse.

http://i1221.photobucket.com/albums/dd465/waterjay/Screenshot-183.jpg
Back at her place, Marysa and Layla started to prepare launch, while Achille and Jude sat down to have a lovely chat. Layla approached the witch, and said with a low tone “This is not any chance meeting. It was more like a meant-to-be chance meeting.”
“I know what you mean!” giggled the witch. “He’s one of us, perhaps we can persuade him into helping us… what was his ability again?”
“Premonition and mind control.”
“He would be perfect.”

http://i1221.photobucket.com/albums/dd465/waterjay/Screenshot-184.jpg
Once the food was ready, the two girls invited Jude and Achille to sit down for launch. After everyone took their seats, Layla tried to bring up the subject about the birth of the Emperor of Evil, and she succeeded, but with difficulty. “So Jude… do you know about the birth?”
“Oh so you guys now THAT too?!”
“We’re tortured by THAT.” Admitted Marysa. “I know this is very harsh from me, especially after not seeing you for like eleven years, but I must ask your help Jude…”
Jude let a small cough out of his mouth. He later said “I think I have no choice…”

http://i1221.photobucket.com/albums/dd465/waterjay/Screenshot-185.jpg
The silence reigned at the table. Later, this silence was broken by Achille, who said “I think this dish is better served cold. How about we start planning while we wait for the food to cool a bit?”. With this successful excuse, they all started to focus on their big problem.
“Ok, after all, my hunger dropped when you brought up this argument…” confessed Jude.
“We need more people… Do you have any suggestions?” asked Marysa.
“Well, the only thing I can think of after what’s happened with you guys is to recruit people from our old sorcerer’s academy, class of 1999…”

http://i1221.photobucket.com/albums/dd465/waterjay/Screenshot-187.jpg
“GREAT!” replied Marysa with excitement. “I think I have our class photo somewhere down in the basement, I’ll go search for it!”.
Few minutes later, she rushed back to the kitchen with the photo in her hand. “It’s a bit dusty, but I think we could recognize some faces!”
“Leave that to me!” exclaimed Layla with a wink. “Jenny and I used to criticize everyone’s sense of fashion and attitude, so I hardly forgot anyone! Hehe!”
“Well then, here you go!” and Marysa placed the picture on a free hanger.
“Oh my God you were so cute Mary! Anyway…The girl with the long thingy is Jenny and the boy with the ugly cap is Nate, oh and the fat guy at the back is Jeremy and….”
“Layla,” interfered Achille, “we’re here to try to extend the world’s life. Keep your comments for later and please choose the comrades with powers that might come in handy along our journey…”


http://i1221.photobucket.com/albums/dd465/waterjay/Screenshot-188.jpgRealizing she had been grounded, Layla suddenly turned into a serious woman and started selecting the companions she considered physically and mentally strong…
“Mimi and Pascal, that’s all I can come up with…”
“Abilities?” asked Marysa.
“Radiation control and Multiplication…”
“That’s good I guess, but we need…” Before she could continue her sentence, Jude let out a scream of pain…
“ARRGGHHH!!”
Seeing him in a struggle, a worried Achille ran towards him. “What is it Jude?!”
“ I… I… I’m having a vision… I feel like my head is blowing…!!!”
“What are you seeing?!”
“ I think… I think demons are coming….”
“You think or you’re sure?!” asked Achille with disturbance.
“No, I’m SURE now! His mother found out everything! She’s sending demons to protect her child!!”
“This is NOT good!” cried Marysa with anger.
“Well, it was better to know the worst than to wonder… At least we won’t be surprised when they come in…” responded Layla with discreet calm.

http://i1221.photobucket.com/albums/dd465/waterjay/Screenshot-189.jpg
“Achille this is no place for you. Since you didn’t discover your power, you can’t wield it, which will make you vulnerable. Get out of here.” ordered Marysa.
“ No, I think I could…”
“GET OUT I SAID!” she shouted, revealing a side of her that never showed up…
“Achille, she’s right” added Lalya. “Besides, since the situation is degenerating, we need Mimi and Pascal to join us as soon as possible… Perhaps you could do that? You’re good at persuading, considering you got me here…”
“Ok.” He replied with coldness, “I’ll make myself useful and gather all kind of information I can about them…” and he left carrying with himself many worries…

http://i1221.photobucket.com/albums/dd465/waterjay/Screenshot-190.jpg
“We need to be ready in case of an ambush… Jude, Layla, you will both try to keep them busy with your powers while I’ll try to chant or cast a spell…”
“We’ll try that. Though the spell will be temporary I guess… Jude are you feeling better?” asked Layla.
“Not really… I’m still having a huge headache…”
“Then rest. Layla and I will take care of this.”
As soon as she finished her sentence, three demons appeared out of nowhere, threatening our heroes’ presence.
“Layla, behind you!” warned Marysa.
“Oh no you don’t!” said Layla as she pulled herself away and started using her power, surrounding the demons by walls of fire…

http://i1221.photobucket.com/albums/dd465/waterjay/Screenshot-191.jpg
“Good work! Now it’s up to me!
Morning ends, night begins,
In pain, thinking of sweetest sins,
Destined to save ourselves with this spell,
Never come back, return to hell,
Increment time, decrease our wait,
Gradually increase your tik tok, don’t make it late
Hours, minutes, seconds lying on that wall,
Today is tomorrow, Midnight fall!”
And the night dropped suddenly, letting the demons fade away…
“I don’t understand… why that spell!?” asked Layla
“Demons dematerialize at midnight. It was the only way…”
“Marysa… my dear Marysa…” said Jude with disappointment…
“What is it?!”
“You fell into their trap…”
“What trap!?”
“You shouldn’t have casted that spell. It is true that demons dematerialize at midnight, but it’s also true that midnight is the cross line between a day and another…”
“So?!”
“So, if you keep casting it, you’ll let the child to grow up with more ease!! His mother will keep sending demons so that you could indirectly contribute to his growth!!!”
“Oh no please tell me this isn’t true…” whispered Layla with despair…
“ I’m starting to question either I have a brain or not… I’m a total disaster…” said Marysa with a shaking tone. She was about to burst into tears, but she tried to keep strong and added “I hope Achille is safe at least…”

http://i1221.photobucket.com/albums/dd465/waterjay/Screenshot-192.jpg
…
Achille was staring at the stars… he immediately understood what happened… “Oh no Marysa… why?” He started to think that he was becoming an obstacle in front of the other’s way, since he was the only half mortal- half sorcerer being unable to discover his supernatural ability. “All I can do at the moment is to really find Mimi and Pascal… I need to get down to some serious researching….”
He decided he’d go back to Marysa’s flat.

http://i1221.photobucket.com/albums/dd465/waterjay/Screenshot-193.jpg
As soon as he arrived, he picked up his keys. But the door of the small apartment he was sharing with Marysa was already open. He walked past it. He looked left, right, but didn’t find anyone. Seeing the empty little house, Achille picked up his cell phone. “Marysa, where are you?”
“I’m at Layla’s! We were expecting a new ambush so we changed location: They’ll take some time before they realize we’re here… Come on, we’re waiting for you. I’m glad you’re safe.”
“Thank you, I’ll come right…” but Achille heard some steps behind him, which distracted him. He turned his face, dropped his phone, and screamed a fading “NO!”…

http://i1221.photobucket.com/albums/dd465/waterjay/Screenshot-194-1.jpg
“Achille?! ACHILLE!!? ACHILLE PLEASE REPLY!!!” Marysa’s emotions took control over her body, and she started shaking. “They… They GOT HIM!” ……….
“….. I can’t believe this. One thing after another. Our troubles have only begun.”
__________________________________________________________________________

Current Events: Chance Meeting, Dish Better Served Cold
Previous Events: Paranormal Character, Emperor of Evil
Word Count: - Brief Summary: 93 words
- Plot: 1714 words
CC Used: Allowed YES, Penalized: NO
Introduced Jude Campbell in the story

[LadyAwesome]

Oh waterjay, it is such an awesome story GIMMIE MORE!

[waterjay]

Oh waterjay, it is such an awesome story GIMMIE MORE!
Trust me, you're the awsome one ;) oh and not only by name ;) *touche' in a positive way* :P

[LadyAwesome]

lol, Oh yeah I totally know hahaha.
Good things take time. I have taken 4 pics so far lol got the story written for them lol just need time to do the rest.

[heaven]

Hey everyone. Just wanted to check in and see how things are going. We're about halfway through the round so I hope that most of you have had time to work on it or at least time set aside for it. Hope that everyone is having a great weekend!

[waterjay]

Omg why is this sooo dead all of a sudden? :( I hope everyone makes it cuz I wanna read the stories...

[Elexis]

Omg why is this sooo dead all of a sudden? :( I hope everyone makes it cuz I wanna read the stories...
Don't worry, I'm sure everyone are working on their stories this weekend :D

[Myshia]

Don't worry, waterjay ;)
Everyone's secretly working on their stories.. i need screenshots to make it complete :D

[ReyaD]

I'm working on mine... about 8 photos have been integrated and just under 900 words written but still fixing up the exposition and have to get photos for the last scene. Really hoping it'll be done since school kicked my behind all week.

[LadyAwesome]

Yeah, I am trying to get as much done as I can too. Good things take time, and its better to take the time and make it good then do it fast and have all the requirements.

[Tamlyn]

I'm not very far in, but I have a public holiday coming (the day after an assignment is due but still before the deadline). I went to take some more pictures today when I was breaking from my assignment, and discovered my game crashed when I tried to leave buy mode after buying something. I could still enter buy mode and move what I already had around, so I just made do lol. I should probably figure out what's causing the crash before the next chapter though! (It also never quits and I have to force quit the blank screen singing sim songs, so I imagine I've got an out of date mod or something, but assignment requires my attention *sigh*)

[Buckley]

I'm also working on mine. I've got 12 of the 15 pictures taken, and 13 of the 15 captions written. So I should have it done no problem. I can't wait to read everyone else's chapter 2! :)

[LadyAwesome]

I was a dumbass, and installed pets - THEN I done my story in charlton - and it does NOT support pets - so either I need to uninstall or move the house to a ea world? whatever happens this is making me way behind and I am over throwing bitch fits when I have so much on lol.

Was so good to spend today at work catching up with random legacies.

[leesester]

I would move the house - so far we have not seen a lot of the world in the pics so you might get away with it.

[LadyAwesome]

I cant move house lol ugh. fml. Miss is going to see if she can though!

[Elexis]

Ok, I have tested my word count in MS Word and that Word Tool in Lee's link. Both showed me different result, which one I should believe? 100 words appeared from nowhere in that Word Tool.
I'm confused :faceslap:

[leesester]

This is he link from the contest rules

http://wordcountertool.com/

Is that the one causing the problem?

[ReyaD]

Oh my gosh guys. Three days til the round is over!

... I should really get started. (I kid I kid! 3/4 done... )

[Elexis]

This is he link from the contest rules

http://wordcountertool.com/

Is that the one causing the problem?

No Lee, this one:
http://www.wordcounttool.com/
I think it shows wrong, because I spend some time to count my words manually, the result was almost like MS Word's. As MS Words shows pretty circumstantial stats (word count, line count, character count and much more), I believe that this tool shows wrong results.

EDIT:
Just checked another contestants text, shows bullshit.

[leesester]

Yes, we have already had this entire discussion Elexis. That is why heaven posted that link in the front page and said we would be using that in Rounds 2 through 5.

http://wordcountertool.com/

That link in the first post was added AFTER the whole word count discussion. When I check word count in this round (and subsequent rounds) then I will be using the link in this post.

[LadyAwesome]

So I have just finished moving the house (Thank you missroxor) and redoing the bedroom and a few things, Although this seriosly means I am behind as my wifey is staying tomorrow night and I wont be able to get it done, sucky as. Oh well. better late then never right?

[ReyaD]

Yaaaaay round 2! Figure if I post now it'll beat the Round 2 deadline rush... well that and I'll probably be too out of it tomorrow and Wednesday to remember to post >_>. Happy Birthday to me~

Come on auto resize, don't fail me now...

Promised
Round Two

RECAP: Born and raised in a small town where all your decisions are made for you, Jessie Jacobs is sure of one thing. She's not ready to be married. She's young, and she wants to be free and unattached. However to deny the wishes of the vampire leader could lead to consequences for her and her family. That is until her boyfriend's poor choice of wording convinces her to take a chance and say no to the proposal. Is she ready to deal with the consequences of her actions?

~

http://i1083.photobucket.com/albums/j386/Rey4rey4/Screenshot-52.jpg

Yelling. So much of it that I had headaches for days following Tyler’s failed proposal. And not all of it was from him. My friends yelled, his family yelled, even my father had a go at making me cry until I simply refused to go outside anymore.

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I don’t regret my decision to refuse his proposal. But I do regret having to stay and deal with the consequences. The vampires in town claimed I was trying to start an uprising. My fellow mortal sims claimed I acted the way I did because my father had spoiled me. They blamed him for my actions. The stares and insults I could handle, but not that. My father had give up so much to raise my sister and me. To hear the things people were calling him now... it hurt.

Was it in any wonder I withdrew from the world around me? Burdens are for shoulders strong enough to carry them. I was not strong. I’ve never claimed to be, and I never will.

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In my city there are two distinct classes. The first: the high class vampires, most of whom were related to Edwin Stone, Tyler’s father, the vampire King. The second: the low class mortals from whom the vampires fed. Some, like myself, were lucky enough to be picked at birth to become mates and until we were of age to marry we would be safe from the disappearances that were all too common.

But didn’t mean we were given the money to live more than a stone’s throw from the poverty line. The bar my father ran was a gift from a vampire he’d befriended long before Janice and I had been born. Besides that we owned only the small beach behind it and the furniture inside of it. My computer had been a gift from one of Tyler’s brothers when I won a storytelling competition at school. Ever since I would write when I was scared or nervous. It calmed me down and gave me a new world in which to immerse myself and hide from the realities of life.

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That said, I wasn’t the only one in pain from all this. Tyler was hit hard by my negative response and the shame of it kept him in tears almost constantly after. When he wasn’t glaring at me in anger or yelling he was in my twin sister’s arms crying. The sight of it alone could have made me apologize and ask for a second chance, but I knew how else my sister was cheering him up when they thought I was occupied.

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The first time I caught them was the very same night I’d turned him down. Just an innocent kiss they’d claimed but all I could see was red. The betrayal felt like a slap to the face and I told them as much. When it became obvious that I wasn’t going to forgive and forget they stopped hiding their affections for each other from me. Tyler told me that we’d marry wether I wanted to or not, but he’d give me time to make the proper decision myself. And as soon as that was done he’d take my sister as his second wife. I was absolutely livid and the entire situation only served to push me even further into my own little world.

Tyler was just lucky Janice pulled him from the room before I staked him then and there. I was certainly angry enough to, consequences be damned.

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I could hear them no matter where in the house I tried to hide. I found Father practicing his dart throwing in the bar and on a whim, decided to grab my jacket. “I’m going out.”

He shot a look at me before turning back to his board. “It’s getting dark. Vampires will be out.”

“What does it matter?”

“They’re mad.” He tried to explain. “You’re protected but they might still attack you.”

“Then let them attack.” I dared. “What’s it matter anyway? If I’m gone then Janice and Tyler can be happy and you can go out again.”

Alright so I didn’t actually say that last part but I thought it. If I’d dared to speak it aloud it might have broken my father’s heart then and there. I was cruel, but not that cruel.

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The jog down to the beach isn’t a long one, but its a rarely traveled one. Our beach is secluded and private. Besides the parties father threw for Janice and I on our birthdays, it was never touched. Imagine my surprise when I turned the corner around the giant boulder and saw the pale skinned man standing with his back to me, next to my fishing pond.

I felt a flush of impatience, and then anger. This was MY family’s beach! I didn’t want to deal with some damn squatter, especially when I still felt like the smallest thing would push me over the edge into an emotional breakdown.

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“Excuse me!” I called out, walking towards him. “This is private property! You can’t be-”

He turned when I was barely arm’s length away from him. It took barely a moment to recognize him, although I had seen him in person only once before and only a few times in the newspaper. Jude Campbell, the richest man in the city, constantly at odds with Edwin Stone although they claimed to be the closest of friends. He was not the kind of man you made angry if you wished to live another day. “M-Mr. Campbell. I didn’t realize-”

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He puts up a hand to stop me. “Don’t worry. I know this is private property, but to be honest I am very interested in speaking to Jessie Jacobs right now.” A pause. “You are her, correct?”

I tilt my chin to the side a bit so the mark becomes visible over my jacket. “I am.”

He smiles. “Good. I’m here to tell you that you’re in big trouble young lady.”

“... I am?”

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“Oh yes, miss Jacobs. Mr. Stone is a close associate of mine and this entire situation has him very unruffled. He’s even considering leaving his roost to pay you a visit and let you see the error of your ways. He wants the wedding to happen before the week is up.”

I felt my heart drop into my stomach. A visit from Tyler’s father always meant death. Who would he take? My father? My sister? I couldn’t live with either of those scenarios. “I’m not trying to start any trouble. I swear. We’ll have the wedding as soon as we can if it’ll please him. Just tell him to leave my family alone.”

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“You mistake my meaning miss Jacobs. My advice to you is to leave town as soon as possible. Forgetting the wedding and forget those closest to you. You are far too... flighty for the life of a vampire’s wife.”

I must have had a stupid look on my face because he chuckled. His laughter just made me angry. “I will NOT abandon my family. They need me.”

“They really don’t.” He says, laughing again. “Head home and you’ll see why.”

“Oh I will head home you square-faced jerk.” Again, didn’t actually say that last line.

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I’d suspected something like this, but it still felt like a stab to my gut when I realized it. Hiding in the room she and I shared, dressed in the loosest clothing she owned, and my boyfriend’s arms wrapped around her. I didn’t need any clarification for why she was crying but I got it anyway.

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“We’ll be alright, Janice.” Tyler’s voice. Neither of them had noticed me in the doorway yet. “I’ll find a way to keep you safe. You and our baby.”

Forget being stabbed. It felt like someone had just replaced my blood with ice and my bones with lead. I wasn’t sure if I’d throw up or faint.

Janice chocked back a sob. “But what about Jessie? If she knew...”

“She won’t find out.” He promised. “I’ll... I’ll do something. I don’t know what. Worse comes to worse we can just leave. Raise our baby on the run if we need to.”

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I saw red. And lots of it. “You piece of scum!”

Tyler jumped back as I stormed into the room, pushing my sister out of the way so I’d have a clear path at him. “Do you have ANY idea what the punishment for wedlock is? DEATH. And not yours, my sister’s!”

“Jessie it’s not like I meant to-”

“No you NEVER mean to!” I yelled back. “None of you stupid vampires ever do! Well you know what, I’m tired of just being a little play thing to you and your family! We’re done, it’s over. I’m leaving and that’s it.”

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I didn’t need to look at Janice to sense her panic. “But if you go then we’ll all be killed!”

I let her worry for a moment, just enjoying her fear. “Oh please, Janice. Even though I feel like stabbing you right now you’re still my twin sister. I’m not about to let you die. Mr. Stone wants a wedding, and there will be a wedding.”

“But I don’t have the birthmark.” She whines. “Mr. Stone says you’re supposed to have Tyler’s first child, not me. Wedding or no he’ll kill me before the baby is born!”

My face pulled into a smile. “And Jessie will give birth to Tyler’s first child, right after they marry.”

Tyler and Janice just looked at me, but I ignored their stares. My plan wasn’t perfect, but it would work. And then I could be free to come and go as I please, not as a fugitive but as Janice Jacobs. “Come on you two. We’ve got to go to the tattoo parlour before morning. Giving you all my tattoos will take a long time, Janice.”

---

Current Events: Betrayal, Chance Meeting
Previous Events: Twins, Paranormal Character
Word Count: 1647, 15 photos
CC Used:
- Allowed: CC world - Harmony by Magic_Dancer (On the EA Exchange)
- Penalized: None

[Tamlyn]

Didn't get as much done as I hoped today, and I've a pretty full day tomorrow :(

Hopefully I'll get to it in time - I just probably won't be as happy with it.

I notice everyone else is leaving it to the last minute like me ;)

[GigaRevival]

Good luck Tamlyn!

And I'll be everyone's kick in the pants to get your stories done. *intense stare*
Not really. Everyone take your time and I can't wait to read your next chapters. ;)

One more day! (technically) YOU CAN DO IT!

[missroxor]

Gah, yeah I'll be working right up to the last minute as usual, lol but don't worry, I haven't abandoned the contest :p I'm not 100% happy with it but I found this round really difficult for some reason :( trying to incorporate the judges comments about giving my characters more realism and letting the reader get to know them was haaaarrdd!

Have about 1500 words though so I'm just gonna have to wrap it up and quickly take 10+ pics D:

Good luck everyone else finishing your entries :)

[Buckley]

Sorry if this has already been answered, but what is the preferred size when you upload your pictures? Can we let them auto resize?

Also, I have one question about MTS contest rules. Are we allowed to use other people's lots as our back drop? I downloaded a community lot from here at MTS, but I'm not sure if I'm allowed to use it for a couple of photos. If not, no big deal. I can figure something else out. But I thought it was worth asking about. Thanks! :)

[blackivy]

Previously, we witnessed Emma’s sadness as her mother married another man, Jack, after the death of Emma’s real father. They decided that it was time for them to have their own child which caused a heated argument between Emma and her mother. Their decision, however, has not changed and soon a little girl named Mary was born into the world, leaving Emma with a feeling of abandonment as her mother devoted herself to the new addition to their little family.


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With the arrival of summer, heat went up for what it felt like a thousand degrees. I didn’t have the willpower to do anything. Dog days, I heard older people calling this type of weather. They were the hottest days of all summer. With my mother still being busy taking care of little Mary, boredom and loneliness soon became omnipresent. I had no siblings to play with and our neighbourhood was filled mostly with older people whose children were already grown up and having children of their own. I could spend hours just laying around the couch doing nothing and hoping that the heat would let go, just for a short while.
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I tried several times to get some attention from my mother to ease my boredom. I even tried bothering Jack once or twice. But when Jack wasn’t busy with whatever he does for a living he would spend all of his time with my mother of playing with her and Mary. Deep down inside I knew that this was a lot for my mother to handle, especially because she had a career of her own and she willingly put it on hold to take care of her new helpless little baby. She would often tell me that I was already a big girl and didn’t need her to be with me every minute of every hour of every day. To an extent I agreed with her but couldn’t help feeling nostalgic.
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I decided that I won’t let my loneliness get the best of me so I found an old fishing rod in the basement and from that day on spent my days enjoying the little lake in the woods nearby. The lake was cool and perfect for a little refreshment when the heat got unbearable and there I was able to amuse myself for hours, fishing, laying in the grass, picking wild flowers or just swimming around for hours on end. At first I thought mother or Jack would be worried with my constant disappearances but they just wanted to know what it was that I was doing for the entire day. After the initial explanation I was left to myself to enjoy the rest of my lonely summer by the lake.
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One evening after my little fishing journey I heard whispers coming from the study and found my mother and Jack in a conversation I wasn’t supposed to hear. It was about me.
“Honey, you know that’s the right thing to do, we have our own child now and you see she’s jealous of her.” Jack said calmly, putting his arm around my mother’s shoulders.
“But Jack, she’s just getting used to her, this is a normal child’s reaction to something like this, this is so abrupt-“
“But honey”, Jack whispered to her softly, “Burdens are for shoulders strong enough to carry them.”
I gasped. That’s what he thinks I am to them? A burden? I couldn’t listen to them anymore. I ran to my room and cried. Awful scenarios ran through my head as I pictured what was going to happen to me next. After all of this, if this wasn’t a true act of betrayal, I couldn’t tell what was.
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A couple of mornings after that horrible event my mother woke me up, helped me get into one of my prettiest dresses and tried to prepare me for what was coming up next.
“Emma, darling, I have something serious to tell you,” she began.
I looked out the window into the first truly gloomy morning since last spring. Back then all was well.
“Jack and I only want the best for you and have decided to enroll you in a private school. It’s a boarding school, it’s not very far from here, you could visit us during the weekend or holidays or whenever you choose. It’s a really good school, too, you’ll get excellent education…”she started blabbering nervously, I could tell. I decided not to let her know that I heard their conversation from a few nights before. Even to my surprise, I didn’t make a scene and just quietly whispered “Okay.”
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Soon, a certain Mr. Jude Campbell rang our doorbell and was escorted into our study where he engaged in a long conversation probably about me and finances with my mother and Jack. I couldn’t hear much because after the initial introduction to Mr. Campbell I was shooed out of the room and the doors were closed. I didn’t even bother to try to hear anything of their conversation because deep down I knew that my fate was sealed and that I was leaving to this Campbell guy’s school and there was nothing I could do about it. I still felt betrayed. I was being sent off to another part of the country because I was a burden to them.
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The two suited men firmly shook their hands and signed the contract between Campbell’s Private Boarding School and my parent and guardian. It was now official. They were willing to pay someone to take me away just so they wouldn’t have to handle me next to their precious new child. I hated both mother and Jack when I saw Mr. Campbell walk out of that study with a wide grin on his originally strict face. He said something to me about seeing me very soon, bowed a little to my mother and walked into the rain towards his car.
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Autumn came relatively soon and so did my new uniform. Not long after, Mr. Campbell showed up at our door again this time to take me away. I didn’t have a lot of things to pack. Everything I thought I must take could fit into a couple of boxes. All I needed was my uniform, really. That and a couple of books. My mother wore her dress that reminded me of old secretaries again. After he stayed for lunch, Mr. Campbell told us that it was time to go and that he had other responsibilities. My mother burst into tears almost immediately after he suggested that we leave our house. She hugged me firmly and whispered to me “It will be alright, sweetie, it will be alright.” She held me in her hands for a couple of moments I wish lasted longer and then it was time to leave.
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We had a relatively long ride to my new school but when we arrived I cringed. It reminded me of a prison, or maybe it was my subconscious that thought it was one. I dropped my boxes on the floor and looked and this big brick structure surrounded by big brick fences.
“This is your new home,” said Mr. Campbell calmly and looked at me.
I just couldn’t reply. I stared back at him and didn’t know what to say. I wished it wasn’t, I wished I could just go to normal school in my town like all the other children I knew.
“Alright, let’s get you settled,” he said after a short pause and we went inside.
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The place didn’t appeal to me at all. It was brown and bland and depressing and ugly. I wished I could be anywhere but there. I placed some of my things around just to feel more at home. It didn’t help. At home I had a huge room with plenty of my things, it was colourful and bright but here I had a little space that could be called my own and the rest of the room I had to share with my roommates. I didn’t bother to introduce myself to any of them. I didn’t care if I had any friends over here. I got here by the act of pure betrayal by my so called “family” that was all I could think of.
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But as much as I tried, I wasn’t able to isolate myself as a girl approached me soon after I unpacked and introduced herself as the girl who sleeps in the bed next to mine.
“I’m Jane,” she said with a huge smile on her face. I introduced myself and we started conversing about many things, most concerning me and how I got here.
“You know, I’ll help you to see that this school isn’t as bad as it may seem,” she grinned. “And my lesson starts first thing in the morning at Ms. Keira’s class.”
Her way to devilishly laugh at things got me intrigued and by the time the lights were out I was able to call Jane a friend.
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Even though I feared my first night in here, I slept like a baby. I was incredibly exhausted by both the trip and Jane’s never-ending stories and couldn’t wait to see what kind of adventures this old school has in store for me. Jane promised me that I wouldn’t be bored, sad or lonely here and so far I have no reason not to trust her. This boarding school idea just might not prove to be bad after all.


Current Events: Dog days, Betrayal
Previous Events: Wedding, New Addition to Family
Word Count: 1496
CC Used Allowed : Yes, Penalized: Yes

[heaven]

Sorry if this has already been answered, but what is the preferred size when you upload your pictures? Can we let them auto resize?

Also, I have one question about MTS contest rules. Are we allowed to use other people's lots as our back drop? I downloaded a community lot from here at MTS, but I'm not sure if I'm allowed to use it for a couple of photos. If not, no big deal. I can figure something else out. But I thought it was worth asking about. Thanks! :)

If anyone has any questions regarding the rules, I should have the main post updated. However, the pictures should be minimum 800x600 and maximum 1280x1060. The word counter tool is also found there.

Regarding the lot, I don't see any problem in using it, as long as you take into account the creator's policy. If they say you can do whatever, it's still always nice to have a "_____ made by so-and-so". Also, check to see if they used CC in the lot because, if you use it, it would count against you.

I look forward to reading the majority of the stories tomorrow! 16 hours and counting!

[LadyAwesome]

I hope I can get atleast 5 pictures in for tomorrow, ugh At least the next round will be much more relaxed.

[Buckley]

Last week, Lily (our main character) was forced to face the reality that the man she loves, Nathaniel, is engaged to her sister Ava. Furthermore, Lily dreams of going away to college to become a famous author, but her rich and influential Aunt Mildred disapproves. She wants Lily to follow in Ava's footsteps and settle down and get married.

******************************************************************
Round 2: Hapless
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I glanced at myself in the mirror and shuddered. I felt hideous. I even wore contacts today instead of my glasses, but it didn’t help. I looked like a sugarcoated pink-frosted cupcake in my bridesmaid gown, and nothing Ava could say would make me think differently. The other two bridesmaids, Ava’s best friends Eloise and Kimberly, snickered quietly. I rolled my eyes and tried to ignore them, but their laughter grated on my already frayed nerves.
“Why do they get to wear pretty dresses?” I whined.
Ava sighed. “Lily!” she exclaimed, sounding exasperated. “You are the maid of honor. Your outfit has to be different than theirs. Besides,” she added, “your dress is pretty!”
I snorted, but she ignored me and walked back into the dressing room.
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A few minutes later, Ava reappeared wearing her wedding gown. Eloise and Kimberly both gasped and rushed over to her.
“You look beautiful!” Kimberly cried.
“Just stunning!” Eloise agreed.
Ava grinned smugly, satisfied with their reaction. I watched from the shadows as they swooned over her, my face twisted with jealousy.
After a few minutes, Ava called to me. “Lily! Come here and help me with these buttons!” she commanded, as though I were her personal servant.
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The dress fitting took all morning, but Ava finally declared herself happy and we headed home. As soon as we pulled into the driveway, I squealed excitedly.
“What?” Ava demanded as I jumped out of the car.
“The mail is here!” I yelled over my shoulder.
Last month, I applied for a prestigious scholarship to the Sim State University in Bridgeport, and I was expecting the decision letter any day now. The money would cover the entire cost of tuition and all the fees, so I wouldn’t have to try and persuade my cranky (but rich) Aunt Mildred to help me out.
I slowly opened the mailbox and sorted through the bills. With shaky hands, I pulled out an official looking envelope. Not wanting to extend the torture any longer, I ripped it open and quickly skimmed the first paragraph. It didn’t take me long to understand the tone of the letter.
Rejection.
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I ran inside, tears streaming down my face. Denied. The word stung like a thousand bees, tearing into my already fragile self-confidence.
“Lily? What’s wrong?” my dad asked, jumping up from his seat at the dining room table.
“Th-They rejected me. F-For the scholarship,” I cried.
He pulled me into a hug. “Oh, Lily,” he whispered softly. “I’m so sorry.”
Over my shoulder, I heard the loud slam of a door and the familiar thump-thump of a cane. “What are you fussing about now, child?” Aunt Mildred barked from across the room.
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I turned around slowly, dreading what was about to come next. “I was denied scholarship money to that university in Bridgeport,” I mumbled, not quite meeting Mildred’s withering glare.
“You applied for a scholarship? Without talking to me first?” She sounded extraordinarily calm for a situation like this, but I could tell the fireworks were about to begin.
“Aunt Mildred, I-“
“My great grandniece, my own flesh and blood, asked, no, begged for tuition money?” she growled, her voice becoming louder and louder. “HOW DO YOU THINK THAT MAKES OUR FAMILY LOOK?!” she yelled. “LIKE A BUNCH OF GODDAMN PAUPERS!”
She continued shouting at me, but I couldn’t take it anymore. With tears pouring down my cheeks, I ran out of the door and jumped in my car. I drove and drove, Aunt Mildred’s furious words still echoing in my head, until I finally reached Old Pier Cove.
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Old Pier Cove was my favorite place in Anne Arbor. As a child, I often stopped there on my way home from school to enjoy the cool afternoon breezes and smell the salty ocean air. As a teenager, Old Pier Cove was my escape from the social nightmare that was high school. Today more than ever I needed to get away, and so I automatically headed to my old retreat. I walked out to the edge of the water and took my shoes off. The fine grains of sand cushioned my bare feet, and the gentle lapping of the waves softened the harsh throbbing in my head. I took a deep breath, allowing my troubles to float away with the current.
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“Lily?”
I jumped and swung around. “Jude? What are you doing out here?” I tried to sound polite, but he had startled me.
Jude laughed. “I was just about to ask you the same thing. Were you crying?”
I looked down, embarrassed. Jude never did have any tact when it came to these sorts of things. “I’m fine,” I lied.
He looked at me skeptically. As one of Nathaniel’s best friends, he and I had known each other for quite some time. “You sure you’re alright?”
I nodded and attempted to smile. “Did Ava send you out here?” I asked.
“No,” he replied, frowning. “I saw your car by the side of the road and wanted to make sure you were okay.”
“I’m fine. Really. It’s just been a rough day, that’s all.”
“I see. Well, I was just heading into town to check out that new club, the Grind. Do you wanna come?”
I didn’t really feel like going clubbing with Jude, but it was getting dark and I didn’t really want to go home either. He smiled at me, his friendly eyes beckoning me to join him. “Well, alright,” I agreed.
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We ordered our drinks and sat down at the bar. It was still a bit early, so the place wasn’t crowded yet.
“How are things?” I asked, trying to sound nonchalant.
Jude grimaced. “You know about me and Diana, huh?”
I nodded, and he sighed. “We’ve been separated for almost two months now, but I still can’t bring myself to sign those damn divorce papers. Every morning when I see her side of the bed, empty and un-slept in, and realize that she’s no longer my wife, my heart aches. I feel like it’s just a bad dream, some horrible nightmare, and any minute I will wake up and she’ll be laying right beside me.”
He gazed at me, his face serious. “Lily, have you ever loved somebody so much that you would do anything, risk everything, just for one chance to earn their affection?”
I stared at him, my eyes wide with alarm. Did he know about my feelings for Nathaniel? Luckily, the bartender appeared right at that moment, and I quickly offered to buy the next round.
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Several drinks later, I found myself loosening up a bit. Normally, I was far too shy to dance in public, but alcohol often caused me to let my guard down. Way down, apparently. As I twisted and grooved to the music, I vaguely wondered where Jude had gone. I couldn’t remember the last time I had seen him. Before I could go look for him however, I felt my stomach churn angrily.
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I hopped down and ran as fast as I could to the bathroom. After throwing up, I stayed in the stall for a minute, trying to collect myself, when I heard the door open and giggles fill the room. Two women began chatting, and I immediately recognized their voices. Eloise and Kimberly, Ava’s friends.
“Did you see that?” Eloise sounded amused.
“How could I miss it? They weren’t exactly trying to hide,” Kimberly replied.
“I didn’t even think Ava liked Jude…”
“She liked him well enough tonight. She was all over him!”
Eloise snorted. “I bet she’s only interested in him because of what you said.”
“That guys find married women unattractive?”
“Yeah. And that she-“
The door slammed closed, cutting her off mid-sentence. I slowly got up and walked out of the stall. I had to go see for myself. Surely it was better to know the worst than to wonder. But then why did I feel like hiding in the bathroom all night?
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After a few minutes, I forced myself to go look for Jude. This was probably all a mistake, I reasoned. Perhaps I was so drunk that I was hearing voices. No, Ava wouldn’t do that Nathaniel. She couldn’t.
But then I saw them there, standing in a corner, their bodies pressed closely together, their lips locked in a passionate kiss.
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Without so much as blinking, I turned and sprinted out of the club, my legs moving as fast as I could manage. I ran until I couldn’t breathe from exhaustion, and finally I managed to flag down a taxicab.
Sitting in the back seat, panting from the exertion, I closed my eyes. I desperately wanted to forget what I had just seen, but I couldn’t. It was seared into my mind.
http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/31408_111101234124Chapter 2- Screenshot 13.jpg
Sleep eluded me that night. The memory of Ava and Jude haunted me, scaring away any hope of rest. I got up early the next morning, and I knew what I had to do.
I arrived at Jude’s at exactly 9 o’clock. I knocked on his door with a brisk tap-tap and tried to make my face as impassive as possible.
The door swung open and Jude greeted me in his pajamas. He motioned for me to come in, and I flounced passed him.
http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/31409_111101234154Chapter 2- Screenshot 14.jpg
Once inside the door, I turned to face him. “Jude,” I began, my eyes burning with unspoken anger. “I know what happened last night.”
He fidgeted uneasily and stared intently at a spot on the floor. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
He lied. They always lie. “Yes you do,” I countered quickly. “You and Ava hooked up.”
His eyes grew wide. “Lily, I-“
“Don’t,” I interrupted. “I don’t want to hear excuses.”
He hung his head, his face full of shame. “Please don’t tell Nate!” he begged. “It was no big deal. Just a one-time thing. We only kissed, I swear.”
http://www.modyourpanties.com/hosting/31410_111101234234Chapter 2- Screenshot 15.jpg
I snapped, my frustration boiling over. “Jude, she’s engaged!” I yelled. “To your best friend! How could you?!”
“Lily, I was drunk! And we only kissed! Really, it was nothing!”
“She’s getting married in less than a month!” I screamed.
He gazed at me defiantly. “Why are you over here talking to me about this?! There were two people involved last night, and you know it.”
I shook my head. He was right. Ava was just as guilty as he was, if not more so. But I couldn’t confront her. She would hate me if she found out that I knew. And what about Nathaniel? Poor, innocent Nathaniel. He deserved to know the truth, but was I brave enough to tell him?

******************************************************************
Current Events: Chance Meeting, Betrayal
Previous Events: Graduation, Forbidden Love
Word Count: 1,767
CC Used: Allowed Yes ; Penalized No
Credit: Klemens- The Saffron Manor- Stylist and Tattoo Parlour (http://www.modthesims.info/download.php?t=435031)

[Tamlyn]

In Chapter One: Shadows, Sofie and her family are introduced. As one of the people she’s been taught to think of only as the enemy chases a child into their territory, her beliefs take a battering.

Chapter Two: Change

http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c157/nylmat/Sims/Sofie%20Story%20Contest/Chapter%202/1Lily.jpg
Lily stayed with us.

She had no home, no family, no memory of where she came from, and so she stayed. She was perfect; she was respectful but fierce; she had a smile that lit up the entire room; she was brave and would fight tooth and nail for those she loved. It didn’t take her long to attach her affection to everyone in the residence. And yet... I was meant to be telling her the rules, as she was to start with the Teacher tomorrow, and she watched me with a cute kind of seriousness. But I felt like a sullen teenager again. My stomach curdled and my instructions descended into angry mutters.

“It’s late, Lily. Just go to bed.” I gave up and snapped at her.

She nodded, her face no less serious. I don’t know what she thought. I doubt it occurred to her how much I disliked her. “Is Shane going to say goodnight?”

http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c157/nylmat/Sims/Sofie%20Story%20Contest/Chapter%202/2Realisation.jpg
Shane did, and it took seeing them together to realise why. He solemnly described the night’s sentry rotations to Lily, and she gazed up at him in adoration.
I was jealous. I was no longer the person Shane was fondest or proudest of. Lily, with her bloodlust and her hero worship, was. My brother had been stolen by a little girl lucky to be alive, and complaining would just show how petty I was. So I said nothing. I watched. And I realised something else.

http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c157/nylmat/Sims/Sofie%20Story%20Contest/Chapter%202/3Jealousy.jpg
Lily tried so hard to be an echo of Shane, even though she’d barely been with us a week. Everything she said was designed to fit his ideals and please him. Everything she did was done with the unconscious need for approval from him. And that had been me. Still was me, as I scavenged for ways to steal Shane’s attention back.

I stumbled from my chair as anger and self-loathing mingled in me. No wonder father had been so amused. I was a pale shadow, a nothing.

“Sofie? What’s wrong?”

“Sofie?”

I ignored the anxious voices, Lily’s shock, Shane’s disapproval. I turned and fled.

http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c157/nylmat/Sims/Sofie%20Story%20Contest/Chapter%202/4Woods.jpg
I didn’t think about where I was running. I don’t even remember taking the elevator. But suddenly I was pounding across grass and hard-packed dirt, into the dark shadows of the woods. Even though I didn’t think, I knew exactly where I was going. It was stupid and dangerous. But they wouldn’t follow me there. They wouldn’t even know to look there. So I tore through the trees, weaving around gnarled trunks and clawing bushes.

http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c157/nylmat/Sims/Sofie%20Story%20Contest/Chapter%202/5Cry.jpg
My foot caught on a root and I tumbled to the ground. I cried out as I slammed into the hard earth; the light bed of leaf litter did nothing. I didn’t bother getting up, but instead buried my face in my arms.

I ignored the damp beneath me and the whisper of the leaves as the wind pushed through them. There were strange sounds in the wood, a place I knew very little about. But the only thing I heard was my hoarse breathing and the litany in my head, over and over, “Shadow. Pointless. Useless.”

It shouldn’t have been so bad. Shane was everything society needed him to be. I should have been proud to be so like him. I should have been proud Lily wanted to be like him too. But I just wanted to be me, whoever me was.

I don’t know how long it took, but eventually my thoughts settled, and my breathing no longer rasped in my own ears.

http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c157/nylmat/Sims/Sofie%20Story%20Contest/Chapter%202/6Watching.jpg
“I was beginning to wonder if you were stupid or just slow. Did you maybe think to look around you at all?”

The accented question acted like an electric prod. I yelped and leapt up. My bones cracked as I swung into a defensive position, my new bruises protesting.

http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c157/nylmat/Sims/Sofie%20Story%20Contest/Chapter%202/7Shhh.jpg
The creature – the man – stood before me. He raised a hand to his lips, a glint in his eyes, and shushed me. We stood in the woods, age old enemies, and he had the temerity to shush me.

My eyes narrowed. I wasn’t dead yet, so he probably didn’t plan on killing me. He’d already had plenty of opportunity – and that thought made me flush. I hoped the darkness hid the colour. Shane would have attacked him instantly and taken advantage of the man’s strange actions. So I just stood there.

Then I blinked. “You can talk?”

“Stupid then. Great.”

I bit my tongue and didn’t say anything else because he was right. I couldn’t help but stare – up close, except for small things like the colour of his skin, he didn’t look that much different to us. Those small things weren’t really that small though. But still, he even looked rather... nice.

“Zayne.”

“What?” I jerked back, my anger as much to do with my own thoughts as anything else. Even Damian would be ashamed at me.

“It’s my name.” He sounded amused.

“You have a name?”

“Don’t you?”

“Yes, but I’m—”

“You’re what, Sofie?”

I opened my mouth and shut it again. Then I took another wary step back.

http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c157/nylmat/Sims/Sofie%20Story%20Contest/Chapter%202/8Smirk.jpg
“How do you know my name?”

His smirk grew. “I’m not the stupid one. I pay attention.”

“You’ve been following me.”

“We’re at war. It’s called spying.”

I was grasping for some sort of sanity; this conversation could not be happening. That was why I didn’t attack – not because I didn’t want to, but because this was impossible. I must have hit my head when I tripped. He was the enemy; he had tried to kill Lily. Then why hadn't he attacked me?

“But you never said what you were.” Zayne sauntered a step closer.

I slid a finger along the lining of my shirt; I wasn't be military, but I certainly didn’t go unarmed. I might even be able to pretend I could use a weapon. “Well, you tell me.”

“I can, if you want. Stupid, definitely. Blind, perhaps. An obedient sheep who’d follow an order to leap from a cliff? Rude, biased—”

http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c157/nylmat/Sims/Sofie%20Story%20Contest/Chapter%202/9Slap.jpg
I hit him. I slammed my hand across his cheek as hard as I could, red blurring my sight. The slap echoed around the woods like an explosion.

It was one thing for me to think it; another for him to say it.

We froze in place, caught in a still photo.

He would kill me now. But...

http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c157/nylmat/Sims/Sofie%20Story%20Contest/Chapter%202/10Laughter.jpg
It took a moment for his laughter to filter through to the working parts of my brain.

He was laughing?

He was; he threw back his head and white teeth flashed in the moonlight.

I stared, then shook my head. He must be crazy. The war had probably affected his mind.

He must have followed my thoughts because his smile took on a bitter edge. I’d always been hopeless at masking my emotions.

“You, Sofie, are also very different from your people.”

http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c157/nylmat/Sims/Sofie%20Story%20Contest/Chapter%202/11Touch.jpg
“I’m not.” I spoke without thinking, and almost all the anger had leached from my voice.

“You’re more different than you think.”

I glanced at him, then away. I needed to get back to the residence before they actually sent search parties after me. “You’re wrong.”

“Really? Prove it.”

“Prove it?” I frowned at him. “How do I prove you’re wrong? Would you like me to attack you?”

He grinned. “You could try. I’d have to hurt you though. Do you know what I am, Sofie?”

“You’re the enemy.”

“Automatic response. Drilled into you. Do you want to know the truth?”

“That is the truth.” Irritation replaced my anger.

“Why am I your enemy?”

“Because you’re a mutant.”

“What’s a mutant?”

“Where are you going with this?” And the irritation was gone now, lost in bewilderment.

He grinned at me again. We were almost level in height, and it took that thought for me to realise how close we were standing. I’d even started to reach out to touch him, to emphasise my point, like I would in a normal conversation with a normal person.

I leapt back again.

http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c157/nylmat/Sims/Sofie%20Story%20Contest/Chapter%202/12Place.jpg
He shook his head and twisted away from me. “Prove me wrong. I’m going to put a picture here.” As he spoke, he turned his back on me and crouched in front of a rock. His daring surprised me enough that I barely paid attention as he pulled something – this picture – from beneath his shirt. But I hadn’t really shown myself to be a danger yet. “Prove me wrong and don’t pick it up. Don’t try and find out who it is.”

I bit my lip. “Who is it?”

With his back to me, I couldn’t see his smile. But I knew it was there. “He’s the reason we’re all here. Find this man. You want the truth? He’ll give you that, give you the whole story. I doubt you’ll like it. But maybe it’ll open your eyes a little bit. You don’t want the truth and want to be just like your brother? Then ignore it. It’s your choice, Sofie.”

http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c157/nylmat/Sims/Sofie%20Story%20Contest/Chapter%202/13WalkAway.jpg
And he rose and walked away, without once looking at me again.

I flicked a quick glance at the picture, then took a few steps after him. “But what’s his name?”

“You expect me to make this easy for you?” He called back without turning.

“Do you want me to pick it up?”

He didn’t answer. He just slipped amongst the shadows, melding with them as if he was one of them. He couldn’t move between the shadows at night, but that didn’t make him any less dangerous.

Zayne. A name made him scarier. It’s harder to hate someone with a name.

I glared after him, and my heart decided to pound as if it only just realised how close it had come to stopping altogether.

http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c157/nylmat/Sims/Sofie%20Story%20Contest/Chapter%202/14Jude.jpg
I looked at the photo he’d left. I had no idea who the man was. But even in the dark I could tell the picture had been taken in our courtyard.

I picked it up.

http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c157/nylmat/Sims/Sofie%20Story%20Contest/Chapter%202/15Worst.jpg
It was better to know the worst than to wonder. Surely it was better.

_________________________________________________
Current Events: Addition to the Family & Chance Meeting
Previous Events: Twins & A Paranormal Creature
Word Count: 1681
CC Used: Allowed: Yes. Penalized: None.

[leesester]

ooooooo. :) Lots of stories - I am so pleased to read them - I continue to be amazed and impressed at the picture skills and the storytelling ability shown in this contest.

/me takes off hat to the contestants

[missroxor]

Recap: Previously Sadie and her little sister Amy woke up on an island in the middle of nowhere. Sadie vaguely remembers being on a plane which she guesses must’ve crashed. After a little exploring they come across four people: Oscar who has just died from his injuries and his wife Ophelia who is now heartbroken. Also, Adrian who makes Sadie feel uncomfortable for reasons she can’t quite explain and Kelly the quiet but fit guy who’s gaze is able to make Sadie forget all her worries ...and her common sense.

Current Events: Dog Days and Funeral
Previous Events: Homeless and Adventure.
Word Count: 1,595 not including this, the pre-amble or the image formatting
CC Used: Allowed yes, Penalized: No – I culled all my cc from last round.

I don’t think I was alone in not knowing what to say. As we stood around the freshly dug mound of earth I looked at Adrian and Kelly, both were avoiding eye contact with anyone. It was sunrise, Oscar’s favourite time of day according to Ophelia and we had arranged a make-shift funeral to say good-bye to a man none of us had ever spoken to or knew anything about...except his grieving wife of course. I was never one for praying but Ophelia obviously was so I bowed my head in respect, what else was there to do? It was Amy that broke the silence, “Don’t worry Ophelia, Daddy says when good people die they go to heaven where they’re always happy and that if you’re good you’ll see them again when you go to heaven. Oscar was good wasn’t he?”
Ophelia stopped sobbing for a moment and looked at Amy’s cherubic face. She smiled faintly, a smile tinged with sadness, “Yes ...yes dear, he was”
http://i859.photobucket.com/albums/ab154/missroxor/Contests/Story%20Contest/Chapter%202/1.jpg

It’s been four days since we first woke up on these islands. Four long days under the heat of the blazing sun. We’ve grudgingly accepted that we may be here longer than initially anticipated. That’s why we convinced Ophelia that we should bury Oscar. She was upset of course but with the heat and the fact that she insisted he be kept in camp, it was becoming really unpleasant to have him around. I worried what effect it would have on Amy too. Ophelia put up a fight of course, the woman had spent the last four days sitting vigil over Oscar’s remains, barely moving to wash or eat but ready or not she had to say good-bye.
http://i859.photobucket.com/albums/ab154/missroxor/Contests/Story%20Contest/Chapter%202/2.jpg

Adjusting to our new life has been difficult, not knowing how temporary it is doesn’t help. I was convinced we’d be rescued within the first day, two days at a push so was not mentally prepared to have to keep going for this long. Adrian has not been helping matters either; he’s some kind of paranormal enthusiast nut job and keeps ranting about the Bermuda triangle. Apparently our flight would have passed right through it...so he says. I’ve stopped listening to be honest, his stories about portals and other dimensions range from scary to just plain daft. If any of us are living in an alternate reality it’s him...alone!
http://i859.photobucket.com/albums/ab154/missroxor/Contests/Story%20Contest/Chapter%202/3.jpg

Kelly has been a god-send. He’s the handiest guy I’ve ever met and we truly owe our lives to him. While Ophelia mourns, Adrian and I have spent most of our days feeling drained from the overbearing, relentless heat. When we haven’t had the energy to argue over his insane theories we’ve mostly just sat, awaiting rescue and feeling rather sorry for ourselves. But Kelly, he’s been hard at work; I guess he must be used to this kind of heat. He wanders out into the tree line every day to work. He brings back berries, wood and once whittled spears and woven reed nets for fishing...a sport he seems to be a natural at for we haven’t gone short of food.
http://i859.photobucket.com/albums/ab154/missroxor/Contests/Story%20Contest/Chapter%202/4a.jpg

On the third day, when we’d given up on a speedy rescue, he’d started work on a raft but then he noticed two shark fins in the water. As he recounted the scene he said they were most definitely great whites and emphasised that they only come this close to shorelines when they’re hunting. Something he picked up as a surfer I guess. I dread to think what would’ve happened if we’d just waded out there not knowing this. None of us want to risk shark infested waters in a tiny raft, we decide to wait for rescue.
http://i859.photobucket.com/albums/ab154/missroxor/Contests/Story%20Contest/Chapter%202/4b.jpg

I close my eyes and shudder as I try to cleanse my mind of what could’ve been. My mind drifts to my reason for being on that doomed plane with Amy in the first place: Jude Campbell. Not that I could blame him for our misfortune, Jude was our uncle and I liked to think of him as a best friend. I was taking Amy on her first ever flight to visit him, she was scared. “Don’t worry, nothing bad will happen” I’d confidently reassured her. Ugh, I wish I could take that back. I wish Jude was here, he’s always great company and he always knows just what to say to cheer me up or to fix my problems. I feel the corners of my mouth twitch, trying to smile if only my heavy heart would let it. I remember the summer he spent at our house. I’d moped about for a good 3 weeks whining about some crush I had that didn’t even know I existed. One day he’d run out of patience and told me, “Sadie, be miserable. Or motivate yourself. Whatever has to be done, it's your choice.” I’d tensed at the sharpness of his tone but came to realise he spoke the truth.
http://i859.photobucket.com/albums/ab154/missroxor/Contests/Story%20Contest/Chapter%202/5a.jpg

His words inspired me, gave me the courage I needed to talk to my crush. I was elated when he hadn’t laughed at me for asking him out on a date but less so when my dreamboat took me to a seedy sports bar where talked about himself or football all night then fell asleep when it was my turn to talk! He was an awful date but I wasn’t miserable anymore because I’d made a decision that had progressed the situation which led me to the truth. That’s it! That’s what I need to do. I’ve been moping around these last few days like a sulking teenager... it’s my choice. I can be more positive about this and start taking control of how I spend my days instead of letting circumstance dictate to me. Of course, I can’t will us off the island but at least if I start being more pro-active, helping Kelly out and stuff, maybe I’ll feel more positive?
http://i859.photobucket.com/albums/ab154/missroxor/Contests/Story%20Contest/Chapter%202/5b.jpg

Just then I feel the late afternoon heat from the sun relent suddenly and look up to see Kelly casting his shadow over me. “Ophelia’s gone”.
“What do you mean, gone?” I’m still feeling a little sleepy from the day’s heat.
“She’s not at the grave, she’s not here in camp, and she’s not on the shore”. He’s serious.
“We should go look for her - ”
“No!” His sharp tone takes me by surprise, “I mean, it’s getting dark, there are probably snakes and venomous spiders in those trees.” He soothes.
“Look, call me impatient but I always figured it was better to know the worst than to wonder. I won’t sleep tonight if I know she’s out there, cold and alone, especially not after Oscar...”
For the first time I notice a hint of impatience in his intense, brown eyes, maybe even anger as he sighs, “ok, but let me go. I know my way around and I know what to stay away from. Besides, somebody needs to stay here in case she comes back looking to be comforted”.
I’m just about to relent when Adrian buts in with his usual sensitivity and charm, “She probably just wandered off to kill herself, because Amy told her she could see him in Heaven when she dies”
http://i859.photobucket.com/albums/ab154/missroxor/Contests/Story%20Contest/Chapter%202/6a.jpg

A soft but unmistakable gasp from behind Adrian grabs my attention, “ugh, Amy, don’t listen to him, he’s a moron!...great, now look what you’ve done!” I hold my hand up to stop them following, “I think you’ve done enough, I’ll get her”.
I don’t wait for an apology, I’m already chasing after Amy as she runs into the tree line crying.
http://i859.photobucket.com/albums/ab154/missroxor/Contests/Story%20Contest/Chapter%202/6b.jpg

I don’t see which direction she went, darkness comes fast and I don’t know my way around. I’ve been too busy with my pity party to explore the area properly which I’m cursing myself for now. I’d figured if there was anything worth seeing Kelly would’ve seen it and told us about it. My eyes start to sting and I feel a lump in my throat as I realise I have no idea where she is except that she’s alone and upset, defenceless against god knows what kind of deadly insects and reptiles are out here. I decide to run back for help, I’ve only been walking 10 minutes so it won’t take long.
http://i859.photobucket.com/albums/ab154/missroxor/Contests/Story%20Contest/Chapter%202/10b.jpg

I reach camp to find Adrian alone huddled over the fire. “Where’s Kelly?” I demand.
“He’s not with you?”
“Does it look like he’s with me?” God, this guy really tries my patience.
“I dunno, he was getting agitated. Don’t think he liked the thought of his precious girls being out there all alone while he sat here helpless” he smirked.
“Precious? What the...”
“You’re telling me you haven’t noticed they way he has you and Amy wrapped around his little finger? Jeez, it’s like you’re hypnotised”
“Ugh, whatever... I don’t have time for your shit, are you coming with?”
“eh, no... I’ll hang back just in case either of them comes back, ...you know”
http://i859.photobucket.com/albums/ab154/missroxor/Contests/Story%20Contest/Chapter%202/9.jpg

Once again I set out into the trees. I’m slower than before because it’s difficult to see where I’m walking. As I go I yell out, “Amy, it’s ok sweetie, come out...Kelly?...Ophelia”. Only the insects hum in response. The lump in my throat threatens an encore. I steel myself and carry on forward. As I pass the point I turned back last time, I stop: sure I heard something. Maybe it was just an animal? Oh god, I don’t even wanna think about what sort of animals might be lurking in the darkness. Then I hear it: a muffled but unmistakable scream of terror. Amy...
http://i859.photobucket.com/albums/ab154/missroxor/Contests/Story%20Contest/Chapter%202/10.jpg

[whitewaterwood]

Sorry, but it looks like I'm not going to be able to make it this round. I was out of town all weekend, and sick the week before, and now it's 4 am and my game stopped working. If I could have an extension with a point reduction I would be ETERNALLY grateful, but I completely understand if not. I'm half done, but right now, even with 4 hours left, I don't think I can make it. To everyone else: Best of luck and I can't see what you do!