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Scholar
#76 Old 20th Jun 2010 at 8:08 PM
Difficult issues like self harm are just that- difficult.
If you are deliberately harming yourself in any way you need to tell someone about it. There's a chance they'll think you're "crazy" but it needs to be done. Of course, saying you'll do it is a lot easier than actually doing it.
I've had to ask for help from my parents for much more than I care to get into, and I'll admit that my mom is not quite a genius, to put it lightly. She did treat me like I was insane for a while- but she did it because she cared and was worried about me, as much as I hated it. The important thing was that I swallowed my pride and got the help I needed
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Scholar
#77 Old 20th Jun 2010 at 11:32 PM
Quote: Originally posted by lovetadraw
Yeah, once started hard to stop.

Telling a loved one? Only makes them think you're insane.

Some people understand, some don't.


"When the moon is in the seventh house
And Jupiter aligns with Mars
Then peace will guide the planets
And love will steer the stars"
Test Subject
#78 Old 6th Aug 2010 at 10:44 PM
Take it from me and my 18-year old sister, self-harm SUCKS. When i was 8, she spent a week in the kookoo house, and 5 years later, i spent 5 days there. killing yourself is not worth it.
Mad Poster
#79 Old 7th Aug 2010 at 9:43 PM
IMO it's the hardest thing in the world to ask for help, because in those minutes or hours before you try to kill yourself, you don't WANT help. You want the pain to go away, and ending your life is the only answer you can think of. I have a number of mood disorders and I've struggled with this impulse for years. It's only recently that I've begun recognizing the signs that I really need to reach out. I still have a hard time doing it, but I've learned to fear the impulse rather than race toward it. It's not the answer I thought it was.
Field Researcher
#80 Old 8th Aug 2010 at 12:17 AM
A lot of times, it's just not something you can will yourself out of doing. I've never cut, but I've got scars from decades of other self-injury. . .couldn't leave anything alone. Got put on a new antidepressant, and without even giving it any thought, suddenly realized that I had no wounds, and I had to cut my nails because they had grown out. Just like that. Clearly, it's not a failure of will here, but something inherent in the brain.
Test Subject
#81 Old 24th May 2014 at 3:00 AM
Default ummm.........
ever heard of Amanda Todd!???????!!!!!!!
Theorist
#82 Old 24th May 2014 at 4:36 AM
Quote: Originally posted by Donut201
ever heard of Amanda Todd!???????!!!!!!!

Interesting point.

Wait...I mean the opposite of that. Whatever not having a point and instead trying to make one without contributing meaningfully to a conversation and using an excess of punctuation is? Yes, that's what you're doing.
Née whiterider
retired moderator
#83 Old 24th May 2014 at 2:03 PM
While we are generally more relaxed about threadcromancy in the debate room, in the hope that a discussion continuing in an existing thread instead of starting a new one will discourage people from rehashing the same old tired arguments again (totally works), resurrecting a thread which has been dead for four years to make a post which doesn't actually say anything meaningful... is bad.

And no, it's unlikely that anyone who posted in this thread had heard of Amanda Todd at the time, since she died three years after this conversation occurred.

What I lack in decorum, I make up for with an absence of tact.
Test Subject
#84 Old 26th Sep 2014 at 6:53 PM
No it is not selfish! If someone is mentally ill, they're mentally ill! But what is selfish is people romanticizing self-harm, like people saying "tragically beautiful" etc. I don't think people should be doing that, it's not right.
Lab Assistant
#85 Old 27th Sep 2014 at 11:44 AM
Self harm dosen’t necessarily have anything to do with attention seeking. Of course there is someone who does it for exactly that reason, but that is far from everyone.

Yes, people who self harm should take up hospital time. Actually I consider it quite important that the hospital use extra time on those patients; there probably is a reason they are doing what they are doing and if the medical service acknowledges this and find out the underlying problems, I believe that will save society for a lot of money later on; after all, as soon as someone gets treatment for mental illness, the smaller the chance for it to develop and become even worse, which in turn will take up even more hospital time. (In my country medical care is free, so it will cost more money for the state to allow it to develop further)

Regarding drinking and smoking: I think it is the same as drinking poison, right out. Therefore foolish to do. But it is not the same as self harm, unless you are drinking for the purpose of 'getting away from everything' and for the sake of damaging your body, like self harm usually is a tool to achieve, and not solely for the purpose of having a good time among friends.
Lab Assistant
#86 Old 29th Sep 2014 at 6:41 PM
Self-harm is dangerous and destructive and should be discouraged. There are a lot of bullies and other bad people who drive their victims to hurt themselves. No one should be bullied and no one should feel like physical pain is the only escape from the mental torment. Those who purposely hurt themselves need help and support.

--Ocram

Always do your best.
Lab Assistant
#87 Old 30th Sep 2014 at 2:06 PM
Quote: Originally posted by AzemOcram
Those who purposely hurt themselves need help and support.


Yeah, that's what I wrote. Just if you were the one disagreeing with my post, lawl.
Lab Assistant
#88 Old 30th Sep 2014 at 5:13 PM
I did not click any of the buttons saying what I think of your post. I did not fully read your post before posting.

--Ocram

Always do your best.
Née whiterider
retired moderator
#89 Old 30th Sep 2014 at 5:58 PM
I really dislike the stigma we have around "attention seeking" regarding self-harm. Attention is something humans need: both on a social level, of needing friends and family to talk to and spend time with; and on an emotional level, of needing the opportunity to share our problems, feel cared for and supported, and not feel completely alone, especially when dealing with mental illness and related problems.

So given that we don't sneer at hungry people for "food-seeking behaviours", or poor people for "money-seeking behaviours", why on earth are we supposed to consider "attention-seeking behaviours" to be something so unworthy?

What I lack in decorum, I make up for with an absence of tact.
Scholar
#90 Old 1st Oct 2014 at 4:54 AM
Actually the vast majority of people who self-harm attempt to hide it in some fashion (where do you think 'emos' got the stereotype of wearing long sleeves?). I have also always said, "if someone wants attention badly enough to physically harm themselves, maybe they fucking NEED attention. "Getting attention," after all, could be accomplished in a number of easier ways: wearing strange/promiscuous clothing, acting silly, etc. It takes quite a bit more to physically harm oneself, or going further, to attempt suicide (which I have also heard people say is "for attention," in which case if someone is almost dying, I reiterate that they probably need some attention).

Personally, when I have self-injured, I have done everything in my power to hide it, whether it's to do it in a place not easily seen, to wear clothing that covers it, or just to not tell anyone. When I first started I thought I was very clever because of how "well" I hid it, but of course I didn't hide it very well at all (thankfully, for my safety). Nearly everyone else I know who does/has done it has hidden it as well. (You do have your outliers and exceptions, of course.) Now, of course, the worst thing is that no matter how well you hide it or attempt to hide it, people can still say it's "attention seeking." Some people wear long sleeves in summertime and people still say it's "for attention" even though they have gone to great lengths and additional physical discomfort to cover it up.

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.”
bleed-in-ink.tumblr.com
Mad Poster
#91 Old 1st Oct 2014 at 6:25 AM
The whole "they're just seeking attention" thing - I think they only say this because of lack of knowledge about self harm. Like already said, those who do self harm will usually hide it, and actually need (the right kind of) attention. They need someone to see the person they are behind the self-harming, and someone who can help them through the struggle.

I've even heard stories where people who cut themselves so they bleed are treated bad when they need to be stitched, and don't get anaesthezia or painkillers. This because "they've already harmed themselves, and obviously doesn't need painkillers." It's very scary that people can even think like that. It's like the health care personnel thinks it's okay to add an extra punishment on top of what the person is already struggling with.
Top Secret Researcher
#92 Old 3rd Oct 2014 at 7:51 PM
Unfortunately, it's a case of a small minority making the rest that need attention look bad. I've heard the girl next door, at age 10, scream that maybe she should kill herself in a deliberate attempt to cause pain to her mother. It's stuff like this that causes the problems. As much as I hate the term "first world problems", this sort of thing can affect the public view.

I would like to clear up the little matter of my sanity as it has come into question. I am not in any way, shape, or form, sane. Insane? Hell yes!

People keep calling me 'evil.' I must be doing something right.

SilentPsycho - The Official MTS2 Psycho
Scholar
#93 Old 4th Oct 2014 at 5:49 AM
Quote: Originally posted by SilentPsycho
Unfortunately, it's a case of a small minority making the rest that need attention look bad. I've heard the girl next door, at age 10, scream that maybe she should kill herself in a deliberate attempt to cause pain to her mother. It's stuff like this that causes the problems. As much as I hate the term "first world problems", this sort of thing can affect the public view.


This is the problem...you have your few people like that giving the VAST MAJORITY a bad name. But those few people tend to be the loudest and what people remember. Tons of people have depression and many people struggle with self-harm and suicidal thoughts. But the vast majority tend to be quiet and hidden about it, whereas the "loud" ones stick out more. (Not that I'm implying that people who struggle with these things, including myself, should always be quiet about it, especially since that can kill you. It's just that most of us don't make a big ruckus, and we actually have legitimate mental illnesses that can stick with you for your whole life.)

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.”
bleed-in-ink.tumblr.com
Lab Assistant
#94 Old 10th Dec 2014 at 10:42 PM
The whole wrist cutting thing confuses me. If you don't want people to see it, why not cut your hip/leg? If you cut your wrists, is it when you go for an artery or something?
Test Subject
#95 Old 12th Dec 2014 at 5:06 AM
Quote: Originally posted by quesadildos
The whole wrist cutting thing confuses me. If you don't want people to see it, why not cut your hip/leg? If you cut your wrists, is it when you go for an artery or something?


the risk of dying makes it scarier, its too feel pain and punish the self. it just so happens its hard to hide your wrist but the scars are still private
 
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