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Banned
Original Poster
#1 Old 5th Jun 2012 at 5:15 PM Last edited by Hladgunnr : 7th Jun 2012 at 2:27 AM.
Default Story I Wrote When I Was Little(ish)
Okay, I only posted this because I'm bored, plus some of my recent stories are being edited. I wrote this when I was ten, and I'll post parts at a time because I'm lazy, but I don't want to do the copy paste crap. SO here goes the story:
Kate fumbled though her drawers trying to find a clean T-shirt. It was a hot July Tuesday morning and the sun’s rays were burning though her curtains onto her back. She finally found a pink T-shirt that read “Shopping In London!” which had a girl with long red hair standing in front of a tall building. Her father had gotten it on one of his many business trips. He was always on one, and currently was in Egypt.
She soon found salmon pink running shorts to go with the London shirt. The running shorts were baggy, but they felt smooth against her legs. She heard a loud sound from downstairs and sighed. It was her brother, Daniel, or as they called him Danny who has Down Syndrome. Kate ran downstairs, where her brother was happily clanging two pots together.
“Danny, you scared me,” Kate said trying not to sound annoyed. “Sorry Kattie!” He said and happily bounced away. Kate sighed. Even though she was only eleven, she pretty much had to babysit her seventeen year old brother. Her mom was usually working out in the gym or at the spa. Her dad was always on a business trip, and the last time she saw him was Christmas. He’d has missed her fourth, sixth, seventh, eighth, tenth and eleventh birthday.
She sighed once she heard Danny jumping on his bed. She told him not to do it, and he stopped. She got carrots and ranch dressing and ate them with Danny. Kate wondered if life could get any worse.
So there's chapter one of the story I wrote when I was ten. Thank ya, thank ya very much.
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Top Secret Researcher
#2 Old 5th Jun 2012 at 5:53 PM Last edited by Levera : 6th Jun 2012 at 11:27 PM. Reason: Really messed up what I was trying to say -.-"
You know when you down yourself, it does make your writing suck. Its telling you instead yes I can, to no I can't.

It was really good, Hladgunnr. Especially, seeing you were ten when you wrote this. That's pretty damn good.

I'll tell you what I told myself. I was really upset one day, thinking of what others were going to say about what I write. And for some reason, I said this to myself:

"If you say you can't, then you can't. If you say you can, then you can. You can't let what you think others are going to say or think about what you write. If one morning you say, I am going to write, and you love it. Then that is what matters. But if you wake up one morning wanting to write, and you take what people think into consideration, then your story will suck. Because you are trying to impress the wrong audience. The audience you should be impressing, is you. You are your audience. So write for yourself, not others."

But with me saying that to myself, or well thinking it. I managed to get A+'s in my English class. Because my teacher never gave up on me

"Queen of the Damned seeks knight in shining piercings for pleasure, pain and purring"--Scary Mary from the Urbz: Sims In The City

"A Famous Explorer once said: 'The extraordinary is in what we do, not who we are.'"--Lara Croft from Tomb Raider 2013
Banned
Original Poster
#3 Old 5th Jun 2012 at 6:05 PM Last edited by Hladgunnr : 5th Jun 2012 at 11:37 PM.
Thanks. I honestly beat myself up sometimes. I write to express myself. I kinda copied off my life, only my brother has autism, but still acts like a child. He's twenty and I don't take care of him of course. My dad's always on business trips, and my mom spends some time with us, but not much. I have lot of secrets that I keep to myself and somehow writing seems to open myself up, because I seem funny to some, but it's just a disguise so I don't express how I really feel. Thanks anyway! (By the way, I'm trying to have confidence in myself, but I've been really stressed lately.)
Banned
Original Poster
#4 Old 6th Jun 2012 at 12:01 AM
Her we go with an even better attitude!
A few hour later, Danny was asleep on the couch after bouncing off the walls for three hours straight. Kate thought, “Finally, some peace and quiet for once,” She went upstairs and drew a little. She drew a tall, Asian women who was sitting down. It wasn’t like how Kate pictured it. The woman’s head was too wide and lopsided, the mouth was turned to the side, the ears were poking out too much and her eyes were too thin and looked like more like slits.
Then her phone used for emergencies rang. She picked it up. “Hello?” Kate said. “I’m going to be a little late, there’s some rice and turkey in the fridge,” Kate recognized her mother’s voice. “Okay Mom,” She said. “Bye!” Her mother said and hung up.
Kate sighed. Almost everyday this happened. It was no fair! Her dad never spoke to her and her mother never payed attention! Kate wished that life would get better, and fast. It seemed that nothing could even go her way anymore! Her dad didn’t speak to her, her mother hadn’t been home for two days since she checked into a hotel room, claiming that she didn’t want to drive out too late, her brother bounced off walls and embarrassed her and she had no stupid friends! She picked up a book and threw it across the room. She sank down and sighed. This was one of the worst days of her fricking life.
Banned
Original Poster
#5 Old 6th Jun 2012 at 9:11 PM
AND I'm talking to myself again. Oh well.
Top Secret Researcher
#6 Old 6th Jun 2012 at 11:25 PM
Lol, Hladgunnr, you have to be patient. People will come and read, and post. I'm liking your story, truly. Its really good. Not a lot of people write a story about autism, and how it can affect people around them. Do not let the non replies put a stick in your mud. You just let it roll of your shoulders. I had a story, the one that was about bullying. It was dead for awhile. But I loved the story, because it did express bullying, and depression. The story was real. And just like this story, it has realism to it. Not a lot of stories have that.

"Queen of the Damned seeks knight in shining piercings for pleasure, pain and purring"--Scary Mary from the Urbz: Sims In The City

"A Famous Explorer once said: 'The extraordinary is in what we do, not who we are.'"--Lara Croft from Tomb Raider 2013
Banned
Original Poster
#7 Old 6th Jun 2012 at 11:34 PM
I know. I'm just not patient. Trying to be though! Yeah I LOVE realism. For some reason if I write a story that's realism, I write it without thinking. I don't know how I do it, but I do. I love writing. It's the only thing that can keep me going sometimes. Being the age I am it's hard having a brother with autism. Even though this dude has down Syndrome, it's sorta based off my brother in a way. Hope more people read this!
Top Secret Researcher
#8 Old 6th Jun 2012 at 11:41 PM
I am sure people are reading this. I am the same way. The story that I have been writing, and will be coming out with Part 4. Honestly, I went with the flow. My fingers took over. And usually when they do, I do not know when to or how to stop. I could write a lot, and never get bored. A simple idea can become an amazing journey. Try to be patient, please :D

"Queen of the Damned seeks knight in shining piercings for pleasure, pain and purring"--Scary Mary from the Urbz: Sims In The City

"A Famous Explorer once said: 'The extraordinary is in what we do, not who we are.'"--Lara Croft from Tomb Raider 2013
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Original Poster
#9 Old 6th Jun 2012 at 11:47 PM
TRYING! Thanks by the way.
Top Secret Researcher
#10 Old 7th Jun 2012 at 4:37 AM
No need to thank me. I am always here for people ^.^

"Queen of the Damned seeks knight in shining piercings for pleasure, pain and purring"--Scary Mary from the Urbz: Sims In The City

"A Famous Explorer once said: 'The extraordinary is in what we do, not who we are.'"--Lara Croft from Tomb Raider 2013
Banned
Original Poster
#11 Old 7th Jun 2012 at 12:44 PM
Thanks anyway.
Kate woke up to a clang of pots. Her arm felt wet, and she was in her clothes from yesterday. She realized she had cried herself to sleep in her clothes. She just hoped Danny didn’t do anything too destructive. When Kate came down the hard oak stairs, she heard a whimper. Danny was on the ground and his nose was bleeding. “Oh Danny. Are you OK?” She asked. He nodded his head and Kate cleaned up the blood from his nose with a white towel. Danny flinched at the touch of the cold towel, but let Kate clean his nosebleed up.
Kate told Danny to wait outside and play. He agreed and skipped off. Kate changed into a red tank top with an orange smiley face on it. She put on denim shorts with faint stars on them and slipped into red ballet flats that pinched her toes. “I should throw these away soon. First I have to make sure Danny doesn’t blow up his swing,” Kate walked out to find that Danny had stolen the change jar and was trying to make a tower for his figurines. “Danny, no. That belongs to Mom and Dad, OK?” “A-OK Kattie!” Danny said cheerfully. She gathered up the coins and put them back in the change jar and watched Danny make a cirrus with clowns taming animals.
Then she spotted a ragged doll among the multicolored clowns. She picked it up, and then almost wanted to cry. It was the doll that Grandma Julie had given her on Kate’s third birthday. Kate never played with it, and six months earlier had died of gunshot. Kate couldn’t find the doll, and felt bad.
Then she snapped back to focus. “Danny, where did you get this?” She asked. “I found it in the attic!” He said, as energetic as usual. Kate sighed and gave up on finding out why she couldn’t find the doll six months earlier. She started to help Danny tame his lion figurine and soon forgot about the doll.
Top Secret Researcher
#12 Old 9th Jun 2012 at 4:27 AM
I am really liking the story, Hladgunnr. Its really good, and I love the realistic side of it.

"Queen of the Damned seeks knight in shining piercings for pleasure, pain and purring"--Scary Mary from the Urbz: Sims In The City

"A Famous Explorer once said: 'The extraordinary is in what we do, not who we are.'"--Lara Croft from Tomb Raider 2013
Banned
Original Poster
#13 Old 11th Jun 2012 at 3:47 AM
Thanks. When I wrote this story, I wanted it to be realistic. Man I just love realism!
Top Secret Researcher
#14 Old 11th Jun 2012 at 4:26 AM
I agree with you, on realism. Most of the books are fake, and blah blah. But I do like that you have put a lot of time and effort in this story, even for a ten year old, that's amazing :D

"Queen of the Damned seeks knight in shining piercings for pleasure, pain and purring"--Scary Mary from the Urbz: Sims In The City

"A Famous Explorer once said: 'The extraordinary is in what we do, not who we are.'"--Lara Croft from Tomb Raider 2013
Banned
Original Poster
#15 Old 11th Jun 2012 at 6:51 PM
Yeah thanks. NOTHING IS REALISM THESE DAYS!!!!
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Original Poster
#16 Old 12th Jun 2012 at 12:53 AM
Later that night, Kate’s Mom still hadn't come back. Kate was pacing while Danny was sleeping in his bed and snoring loudly. “There’s an explanation for this. Mom just forgot to charge her phone and can’t call me. She will be back tomorrow,” Kate thought. She searched the kitchen for something to eat. Nothing. Nothing sounded good to Kate. She got dressed in her PJs. She slipped in bed and tried to fall asleep, but nothing worked. She got up at about 3:37 in the morning. Kate stared out the window. She pressed her nose against the glass. She saw a light flicker on. Kate saw a girl about her age get up and run off to the hallway and then disappear into a room.
A few minutes later Kate shut her curtains and started to get dressed. She put on an amber colored T-shirt with Keep Calm And Carry On in sliver letters and a sliver crown. She picked up some cream colored pants on with green flip-flops.
Kate applied some cherry lipgloss and put her messy hair into a ponytail. She walked down stairs and made some toast with jam and some milk for her self. Kate wolfed it down then turned on some TV and watched for an hour.
Then Danny came down in red PJs. “I’m really hungry! Where’s Mommy?” Danny asked. “She’s heading home,” Kate lied and made some cereal for him. He ate his rainbow hoops cereal quickly then watched his favorite show. Kate laid down and sighed. Her mother wasn’t coming back as far as she was concerned.
Thank you guys for reading!!
 
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