"Well, my computer isn't on fire yet. Better add more CC!"

"Oh, hell, I made the wrong Sim fat..."

I wanted to cast the Corpus Fleshicus on William for giggles (I was going to make him fit again), but even with all these Sims' new looks, I still confused him for his father and swelled him up instead. Back to Corpus Athleticus for you!

"I am one messed up simmer. Chandler, please don't get pregnant."

Jay Bush is my neighborhood's mad scientist. He currently has his boyfriend, Chandler, locked up in a secret part of his lab. His three kids from his previous marriage (Jay is a widower) have no idea he's on the lot. Poor Jay never got over Felix's death (even if it was of old age...).

"Timmy, could you not?"

"Bertha doesn't like you. Why do you try to play red hands with her?"

"Timmmmaaayyyy! No! Nee! Nein! Non! Niet!" (He started a fire that spread. He's ok though, his eyebrows didn't make it)

"dogs getting pensions" - my friend, after I showed him this screenshot:

"Where are your priorities?" --My friend, to his sims, who are tired, hungry, stinking, and need to pee at 2 am on a schoolnight.

"Where are YOUR priorities?" --Me, to my friend, pointing out that their poorly-managed needs are his fault and his alone.

Ah, bless him. He's still learning.

"Nobody cares about your tears, jackass, get outta my house!"
To the cow mascot. He'd shown up at the same time as Wilde Hart's family on the day I decided to have Wilde invite his fiancee Davine Newson and his mother, brother, and sister-in-law over all at once to get to know each other better. From the moment the cow showed up Wilde was chasing him all over the lot trying to kick him out and Jason-the-Cow kept evading him. Finally he forced a flirt on Erika, the sister-in-law (who just got pregnant and married this rotation). She rejected him and Cole, the brother, ran over to punch him. So Jason starts crying. Cue the sound of the world's smallest violin...at least that made him stand still long enough for Wilde to boot him out. And when Wilde influenced Erika to Appreciate Cole, she gave him a backrub, which he accepted. So maybe all is well...Except, of course, that now Mom and Wilde are furious with Erika, guiltless though she is!

"No, you pee HERE."

"Oh god. Ghost sister. No. Go home." To my sims dead sis who keeps coming out to reenact her death and be annoying if you don't mourn her every hour of the day....

"What are you doing?!" to a Sim who decided there was nowhere to put the bottle for his starving toddler so takes it downstairs to put in the bin.

"Why are you in ther--I set the toilet for sale, didn't I."

"For heaven's sake, THINK OF THE BABY!"

My sim is practicing his skills on the cash register, but he's pregnant. The drawer keeps smacking him in the stomach. I pity this poor kid and he hasn't even been born yet.

ihate's friend: c
ihate's friend: communism
ihate: blame pescado for that
ihate's friend: communist toilet
ihate: business runs you
ihate: toilet flushes you?
ihate's friend: shit takes you
ihate: sir
ihate's friend: but that's soviet russia
ihate's friend: for a communist toilet, everyone must have to take an equal shit
ihate: i'll have my capitalist toilets thank you very much
ihate's friend: so both the baby and the 35 year old take identical sized shits and this is weird
ihate's friend: this is what your silly games do to me
ihate: sir

Lately..."Vooooo gerbits!"
I have a love hate relationship with that cheer, after hearing it so much, but it's so catchy lol

"Darling, this is your intervention." I'm getting a little worried about Love thy being on the exercise bike all the time. Surely some sims are drawn to certain things they enjoy, but I haven't seen that level of obsession before.

"I'm going to wait for a bit for Adrian to have his first baby, Gen A are still toddlers."

"Okay, thanks ACR, now he's pregnant." Gives birth during father's birthday. "Okay, interesting timing." Turns to another sim and sees TFB popup for Adrian and his husband Paul. "Seriously, you just gave birth!" Hears chimes. "Well, there goes that idea. At least the toddlers are kids now."

Damn sims!

*Simsona casts chicken spell on herself in front of her lovers*

"Okay, I expect quadruple minuses out of this."

*Results came back positive from both men*

"What?!"

*laughs hysterically, then William starts his own laughing spell*

"What a way to rub salt on the wound, dude."

Edit: Oh, wait. I just found out I DID get quadruple minuses from that outcome. The positive points before came from the two playing Red Hands during the shenanigan.

Me talking to my fiance: "Look at my cute little sims family. They look so happy" (Made of dad, mom, and child)

-Seconds later-
*Sends dad to telescope*
*Sends mom to burn leaves out of garden*
*Sends child to bed*

*Dad gets abducted by aliens*
*Mom's fire becomes uncontrollable and dies*
*Child is taken away by social services because no parents are around*

Me to my fiance: "So I accidentally destroyed that cute sims family..."

After I changed the settings of the triplets and quads mod for Candace Campelle and clicked on "random"
- Oh, great. Twins...
- Hum, nope. Triplets!
Armen, Candace's husband rolled the "have 10 kids" want.
- Hum. No way.

Look at them carefully: "hum can't tell if two of them are red haired or not".
- "Oh that one has golden eyes!". I'm overjoyed.

Check the NH census. "How come do I have 175 playables!"

Today alone I said

Go to your final exam you dingbat! (I saw she was going and then something stopped her when I wasn't looking and thankfully I realized in time)
You were supposed to go to the bathroom first! Oh..NOW someone is in that stall
Really..you don't need to run
Why do you want to argue?...fine
No you wanted to argue you are going to argue (she couldn't wait for him to be done darts...)
Wow...I think you LIKE being annoying
I'm guessing you *really* wanted that lunch meat sandwich
No! Don't eat that!....ewww (I noticed pizza behind sim on counter had gone bad right when a sim that had taken a piece of it was going to eat it...I was too late)
Or not..you could decide to visit campus instead

I will preface these words by saying my sister is visiting and playing my sims again. She was playing the 'Randy' clan, a family she made that lives in a trailer and then had pop out 6 children with underbites, all with some kind of 'Rand' derivatives in their names.

Anyway it was Randy's Birthday today and the following convo happened:

Her: "I just want to say, I haven't done anything and this party is already at 'good time'

Me: *disgruntled* "WTF, there's isn't even anything to do at Randy's place!"

Her: *Zooms in* "...Well there's some grilled cheese..."

Then a minute later at the party I notice Randy's son, Randy Jr, outside playing with a random cat and ask, "Is his son fat??"

Her: "Yeah, must have been the grilled cheese..."

When all the neighbours try to crowed a bathroom... Me - "For cryin' out loud! why don't you just start an old-fashioned line instead of barging in? his isn't your house you know? how rude...".

When they keep putting their plate down on the floor instead of going straight to the sink to wash it...
Me - "What is wrong with you? why are you putting it on the floor? jesus christ almighty! why do i have to keep telling you? your just going to stand there after putting it down and then pick it up again and wash it anyway, why do that when you can wash it straight away?" (not all sims do this but those that do annoy me badly, i don't want plates all over the floor). Same for coffee cups, what's the point of putting them on a coffee table where i have to then click it to make them wash it?.

When a toddler keeps playing with the toilet...
Me - "Stop playing with the toilet! i'm not giving you another bath and your going to get the floor all wet"

I talk to them like they are really here as real people and i say things to myself like "Aww... there! you look bootyfull", "Okie, time for bath time! your all smelly", "Quick! go to the toilet before you pee yourself!", "Quick! feed the baby before the social comes!", "Why aren't you in bed yet?", "hurry up! your going to be late!", i get super engaged in it haha.

*hovers cursor over Frank's icon to see he wants to do a pillow fight with Andrea*

"Oh, come on, Frank, not another pillow fight." >.<

While watching them go at it, I clicked on his icon to cancel the event.

"Shoot, it's like William might as well get my Sim involved in a water balloon fight right now." (This was as Frank and Andrea were getting done.)

A second later, a red water balloon appears on William's hand as he reveals an evil smirk.

"You gotta be kidding me..."

"Agh! Agh! Agh! Agh! Agh! Agh!"

Playing Akira Granville-Carver's household.

She's pregnant with 1 baby. She gave birth to a baby girl: "Yeeeeessssss!"
The baby girl is green-skinned: "Noooooooo!"

ihate's friend: also is it me or does ts2 have strangely anime-inspired eyes
ihate: yeah
ihate's friend: sugoi
ihate: i have default eye replacements so it doesn't look as bad
ihate: but the replacements look odd with plain maxis skins
ihate's friend: yeah
ihate: so i have to find another replacement for the skintones
ihate: and you can see the downward spiral
ihate's friend: [insert snark about the solution being to not play here]