For those of you who don't know, Big Brother is a reality show where a number of people (usually 12-16) are locked in a house together and must vote someone out every week until only one person is left in the house and crowned the winner. This is exactly how it works in the Sims, but with the added bonus of letting Sims AI go wild.
Create 8 Sims (or more if you have the mods to allow it. I personally enjoy stuffing around 14 of the nutters into a house) of various ages and personalities. This is really where you can have the most fun with the challenge, as it's where you'll make the actual contestants. Do you want to make 8 of the most ridiculous reality show stereotypes? Do you want to use 8 Sims you've already played with and made? Do you wanna use 8 completely randomized Sims? It's your choice! Ideally you should have a 50/50 male/female split, but if you want to disregard that rule, go ahead! You're Big Brother here!
Next, you need to make the house. Again, you can really have fun with this. You can give them a luxurious, million dollar mansion or a trashy, 2-room trailer. Although just to keep things a bit sane, you should follow the following guidelines:
- Have at least one sleeping spot for every Sim. Whether this means every person getting their own bed, everyone having to nap on a sofa, or everyone having to share a double bed is up to you.
- You should have a large sitting area for everyone, and a dining room.
- You should give them a kitchen with the necessary appliances to make meals (fridge, stove, microwave, etc.).
- You should also give them a functional bathroom, with at least one toilet, one sink, and one shower. Also, speaking from experience I can say that only giving them one toilet and one shower can really slow down the action and entertainment, since everyone will be waiting to use them. You can be sadistic in handing out potty privileges, but it's probably your best bet to give them 2 or 3 toilets and showers.
- Just for fun, give them a fireplace >: )
- Since the whole idea is that the Sims are cut off from the outside world inside the house, you should NOT give them any of the following:
-- Radios/ Music players
-- Bookcases/ Books in general
-- Any hobby or skill building items
-- Fire alarms
-- Burglar alarms
- Also, in the vein of being cut off, you should make it so that the Sims are unable to leave the house until their eviction. Until someone makes a mod that enables locking doors, this means deleting the front door. (EDIT: Our Lord and savior, scumbumbo, has made a door locking mod!)
Alright, with all that out of the way, it's on to the actual game!
Once everyone moves into the house, you are no longer allowed to control them. From here on out, the Sims are their own entity, and based on what they do and who they hang out with, they will directly control their fates in the game. You are Big Brother, and while you can punish or reward them based on what they do in the house, you main job is to watch them as everything plays out. If someone dies, oh well! You can have someone else come in to replace them, but once they're gone, they're gone.
Money should not be an issue; since you'll be using so much money to furnish the house and buy task items, just cheat it in. However, feel free to make life in the house as easy or hard as possible. Take away showers and toilets when Sims don't clean them. Force them to wake up at 6 AM every day with a wake up call. They're gonna have to WORK to win this game!
This is how you determine who leaves the house. Every week you should provide them with some task to do (usually skill building), and the person who fails this task is evicted from the house. What I've provided below is a sort of "Default" list of weekly tasks, and by all means feel free to change it up. You may want to reward the person who succeeds the most at that week's task, or give/take away luxury items from the house depending on how well they do as a whole.
Week 1: Painting Task
Buy enough easels for every Sim to have one. Leave them there for the week. The Sims should use these easels and build up their painting skill over the course of the week. The Sim with the highest painting skill at the end of the week wins, while the Sim with the lowest skill is kicked out of the house. As an added twist, sell the paintings the Sims make to buy something nice for the house.
Week 2: Chess Task
Give the house enough chess boards for every person. Same as last week, they should play chess over the course of the week to build up their logic skill. Again, Sim with the highest logic skill is rewarded, while the Sim with the lowest skill is kicked out.
Week 3: Social Task
This week, we let the house have a little fun! Give them bars, card tables, anything they need to have fun and get to know each other better! This week is all about socializing and building up relationships. The Sim with the best relationships in the house wins and is rewarded, while the Sim with the lowest relationships is kicked out!
Week 4: Athletic Task
Provide the house again with enough athletic equipment for everyone. Like the skill tasks before, this week the Sims must get jacked to stay in. Whoever has the highest athletic skill at the end is rewarded, while whoever has the lowest skill is once again kicked out.
Week 5: Music Task
As there are fewer and fewer people in the house, the Sims get a chance to wind down with some music. Give the house enough musical instruments- guitars, pianos, violins, french horns, accordions, whatever- and let them make wonderful music. Whoever has the highest skill in their instrument at the end of the week wins, while the person with the lowest skill gets the boot. For added fun, give each person a different instrument and have them make the first ever Big Brother band!
Week 6: Outside the House!
Now that we're down to the last few people, everyone finally gets the opportunity to leave the house! Every day, take them all out to a venue and let them run wild in public. Maybe take them to the park one day, and to the bar the next. You can make these trips outside as long or as short as you want, but their goal this week, aside from having fun, is to form relationships outside the house. They should make friendships with people in the outside world. However, the only twist is they cannot invite these people back to the house, meaning all socialization must be done while outside the house. At the end of this week, whoever has the most and the strongest relationships outside the house is once again rewarded, while the person with the lowest outside relationships gets kicked out.
Week 7: The Grand Finale!
If you're playing with 8 Sims, you should be down to the final 2 at this point! They've both fought hard to make it this far, but at long last it's time for one final task to determine who is the champion. I've come up with two final tasks here, but as always, feel free to come up with your own.
-Task 1: The Final Assessment- For this last week, give the Final Two EVERYTHING. Give them every skill item, every entertainment item, give them access to the outside world, spare them nothing. This week it's a mad dash to practice as many skills as possible, because at the end of the week you will subject them both to a final assessment of their time in the house. Come up with a scoring system of some kind: +1 point for every skill point gained, +2 points for every friend made, +5 points for being the winner of the weekly task, etc. You should give them points for their accomplishments, and take away points for failures. Whoever has the highest score is the winner!
-Task 2: Get a Job- For this last week, the Final Two must get a job. They must build the skills and form the relationships necessary to advance in their career. Whoever is the highest in their job at the end of the week wins!
Once the winner has been determined, you should reward them accordingly. Make them a millionaire, grant them their every wish, or for an added twist of irony give them the house! They've won, so they deserve it!
And of course, you can completely disregard everything I said above and come up with your own system for kicking people out. You're Big Brother, so it's your choice! I hope you guys enjoy trying out this challenge!
EDIT: Another fun way to do this challenge, and the way I prefer it, is with the American/Canadian rules. This version is a bit more complex, but arguably more fun. It encourages kicking unpopular people out of the house, though, so you may not want to try it if you love your drama machines!
-For this version, you're probably gonna need more than 8 Sims, so be prepared to use a mod.
-You will need to create at least 3 different bedrooms: One nice, luxurious bedroom; one or more average bedrooms; and one cheap, trashy bedroom.
-On the first day in the house, give the Sims some easy challenge to do (i.e. stay on the treadmill, make a meal, etc.) this will act as the first weekly task. Whoever does best at this challenge will become the Head of Household, or HoH for short. The HoH will be allowed to sleep in the private luxurious bedroom (dubbed the "HoH Room") and will be safe from eviction for the week. However, they will also have to nominate two other Sims for eviction.
-The 2/3/4 Sims who do worst in the challenge will become the "Have-Nots" for the week. The Have-Nots must sleep in the trashy bedroom, and will be forced to clean any messes/ fix any broken appliances in the house. You can also force them to wear embarrassing costumes for added fun
-After this, give them the weekly task as usual.
-About halfway through the week, look at the HoH's relationships with their housemates. The two people the HoH has the lowest relationship with will be nominated for eviction. You can have the HoH insult or argue with the people they're nominating just to be a jerk.
-At the end of the week (Saturday/Sunday) everyone should gather in the living room for the eviction vote. Check the relationships of each of the housemates. Each person will vote to evict the nominee they have the lowest relationship with. For obvious reasons, the two nominees won't vote, and the HoH will only vote in the event of a tie. Whoever gets the most votes will be evicted from the house!
-After this, look at the results of the weekly task. Whoever performed best will become the new HoH, and the people who did worst will become the new Have-Nots (NOTE: I just realized I forgot to say this: One person cannot be HoH two weeks in a row, but they can be a Have-Not two weeks in a row).
-Repeat this cycle until the final two. At this point you can come up with a final challenge (such as the helpful ones I provided above! ). Whoever wins that is the winner!
"What should you do when you've already got everything you ever dreamed? DREAM BIGGER!!!"
-Miss Nancy, Little Inferno
Episode 1: Eight New Crazies
Hello, and welcome back to "The Doll House", the most dramatic reality show EVER! We have eight new contestants ready to move into the house and begin the battle for one million dollars, and things are gonna be a bit different this season. Remember the HoH's, nominations, and large number of houseguests that made the first season so memorable? Well, forget all that, because we're throwing it out the window! This season, we're going to have a challenge each week, with the person who does worst in that challenge getting the boot. It should be fun, so let's get right to it.
Here's everyone moving into the house. I was going to build them a new, proper house, but then I got lazy so instead they'll be living in a slightly modified version of Umbrage Manor in Willow Creek. Before we go any further, I should probably introduce the 8 nutters we'll be watching for the next seven weeks. Prepare yourself...
Occupation: College Student
Johnny is your typical college kid, meaning he spends 90% of his time sleeping or otherwise screwing around, and rushes to do what he needs to do at the last second. If you couldn't tell by the name, he also wears sweatpants a lot.
BLORT LEROY (credit to phreakindee for this Sim)
Occupation: Self-Employed Masseuse
Blort is an odd one. Some people think he's an alien from another planet, while others think that he's just a regular Sim that's blue for some reason. Either way, expect him to be the house oddball.
HARRY T HOTDOG
Occupation: Hot Dog Cart Mascot
-Essence of Flavor
Harry T Hotdog is a man who has lived in a hot dog suit his entire life. Why he doesn't change his clothes, nobody knows. Obviously, the teasing he's received because of this suit has led to some self esteem issues. His lifetime dream is to make the finest hot dogs on earth. How he expects winning "The Doll House" to advance this dream is a mystery.
Jeff is your typical Cali bro. He spends every day getting drunk and hanging out. Now he's come to the Doll House expecting to have a fun time with normal people. Haha, oh how little he knows...
Occupation: Tattoo Artist
Moody Meg is the quintessential goth. Although her name may have led you to believe otherwise, she's completely emotionless. Seriously, we did tests on her before the season began and we still can't tell if she's a robot or not.
Occupation: Warrior Princess
Shadbak is an Orc Warrior from... wherever orcs come from. She's only slightly psychopathic, but our casting department has assured us she won't attack anyone while she's in the house; well, probably not.
Occupation: Fashion Designer
note: any resemblance between contestants and persons, real or fictional, is completely coincidental
Rafaella is the self-proclaimed "Most Beautiful Woman in the World". She started out as a nobody, but 29 years, 3 husbands, and 30 pounds of silicone later she's an unstoppable force! The Merchachi brand is one of the most well-known in the world, and with her appearance in the house Rafaella hopes to boost her chances of being elected world leader.
Occupation: Professional Swimmer
Aqua is the typical nature-loving granola girl. She's loved the water her entire life, as evidenced by the main color of her wardrobe. Despite all that, she's probably the most sane person in the house, which isn't saying much.
For their first weekly task, the houseguests must paint all week. Whoever has the lowest painting skill at the end of the week will be evicted. This should be simple, right? Right?...
Eviction isn't the only incentive to do well, however. Whoever has the highest skill will earn their own luxurious private bedroom away from the rest of the house, with its own private bathroom. This bedroom will switch hands twice a week: once during a mid-week skill check, and once during the eviction ceremony. With all the boring explanation out of the way, let's jump right into all the exciting action going on in the house!
Everyone's settling in and getting to know each other. I'm betting two hours until the first fight breaks out.
And here we see the first major roadblock of this season: phones. Everyone wants to use their phones rather than talk to each other or work on the challenge. It's annoying! *insert social critique about how phone overusage in the Sims parallels real life phone overusage*
Here we see Rafaella, who has decided that critiquing the paintings already in the house would be much better than, y'know, actually painting.
"Ugh, this painting is just so unfashionable. I mean, piano players are so 2014, and this is 2015. Completely different story!"
And Shadbak heads into the backyard. Will she be the first to attempt the challenge?
...No. She just wanted to make fun of the gardening lady next door.
Shadbak:"Hey lady, gardening SUCKS! HA!"
Gardening Lady: "*sigh* Why does nobody appreciate my plants?"
Meanwhile, back inside, phones continue to be a problem. Hey guys, we didn't cast you so that you could sit in the house and play on your phones all day. Do something!
Harry:"No way, man. I'm close to setting a new high score in Flappy Bird!"
Meg:"Come on guys, get off your phones. Everybody knows phones emit radioactive waves. I mean, look at that white outline they've made appear around the couch!"
Erm, yeah, that's totally the phones' fault. <_<
At this point I figured they weren't painting because they need to have painting on the mind before their autonomy will tell them to paint on their own. So I made everyone paint a small painting in order to encourage them to paint more.
Blort, that's an, um, "nice" flower you've painted there.
Blort:"I know, right? I painted it in honor of my new love, Gardening Lady. Hopefully she'll see my painting and understand how much I know her floral struggle!"
Sorry, man, but all these paintings are being sold to pay for house expenses. It costs a lot of money to run this house! But now that you've painted one painting, do you feel that urge to paint another?
"... nah! I think I'd rather play some more Tetris. I've almost beaten my high score!"
*sigh* phones will be the death of me in this game
And it looks like we've had our first awkward encounter, as Harry walks in on Jeff peeing!
Jeff:"Hey watch it, wiener man! This sight is for chicks only!"
Harry:"*gasp* Oh I am so sorry! I did not mean to walk in on you at all. Oh, this is so embarrassing *becomes embarrassed*"
I almost forgot about a big change to this season: Moods! I'm hoping that the new mood system will lead to our dollies making a lot of dumb decisions. For example, let's watch as Harry attempts to deal with his embarrassment.
First he attempts to vent his embarrassment to Rafaella.
Harry:"Oh, it was just so embarrassing! I feel so bad now! Oh, I hope Jeff will forgive me!"
Rafaella:"Honey, I feel you right here in my heart. I know your struggle. You just push through, and know Mama Rafaella is here for you... at least when I'm not bothered by the house's art."
"I mean look at this! A cat jazz singer? What is this, a 70s Disney movie? This is unacceptable!"
Your comments hurt me, Rafaella.
But in the end, Harry decided to hide from everyone else in the bedroom.
"*sigh* Why do I mess everything up?"
"Okay, I'm totally better now. Mac & Cheese, anyone?"
I'm waiting for him to make some hot dogs and commit cannibalism.
Grr, look at them all out there, enjoying themselves on the patio, mocking my paint easels.
Jeff:"Yo, Aqua. Know what I love? Not painting!"
Aqua:"Me too! I don't think we should paint again, ever!"
At least that's what I'm assuming they said.
Jeff:"Know what else I love? Making fun of Gardening Lady! Hey lady, my dad gives me more spending money than you make in a year!"
Gardening Lady:"One of these days I'll make them see the joys of gardening..."
To be fair, you have been gardening for 20 hours straight at this point. Maybe it's time to take a break.
In the dining room, a few of the houseguests are sharing their stories.
Rafaella:"...So yeah, that's how I murdered a man to launch the Merchachi brand to worldwide success! Why don't you tell us about yourself, Blort"
Blort:"Okay! I was actually raised by robots after my parents died on a fishing trip, or at least that's what the robots told me happened to them..."
Note: That line was a lot funnier when there was a robot speech bubble coming from Blort. I also discovered that screenshots in Sims 4 don't pick up speech or thought bubbles. So that's cool.
And to end the night, we get Harry teasing the never-sleeping Gardening Lady one last time before bed.
Harry:"I am made up of nonvegetarian meat products! FEAR ME! HAHAHAHAHA!!!"
Gardening Lady: "Gah! Not meat!"
And that's a wrap on Day 1 in the Doll House. As our new dollies settle in to their home, they don't realize all the drama and twists that are headed their way! Next time: Who will win the luxury bedroom in the first mid-week check? Will anybody actually bother to try the painting task? Or will the season come to an abrupt end when Gardening Lady snaps and murders them all? Find out next time on "The Doll House"!
"What should you do when you've already got everything you ever dreamed? DREAM BIGGER!!!"
-Miss Nancy, Little Inferno
PREVIOUSLY ON "The Doll House": Eight new Sims moved into the house to begin the battle for one million dollars, among them a raging orc warrior, a man in a hot dog suit, and a blue... thing. Immediately the first challenge was given to them, and they were told to paint their hearts out. However, nobody decided they wanted to paint, and instead decided to just goof off. As the day went on, the houseguests found mutual friends in each other, and a mutual enemy in the gardening-obsessed lady next door. Now: Will the houseguests finally start to paint? (Answer: no) Will two of them find love? (Answer: no) And what will happen when one contestant is rewarded, while three others are punished in the worst way? (Answer: not much. Aren't you so excited to read this now?) Find out the answer now on "The Doll House"!
DAY 2 (Monday):
Johnny has apparently decided that he's too good for a bed and would much rather sleep on the living room couch.
"I'm used to sleeping on couches at college. This just feels natural to me, man."
Meg is the first one to get up, and is now drinking milk alone on the patio.
"This milk is so white and pure... unlike my heart *sigh*"
I have a feeling she's going to be this season's Raven
"Oh boy! It's time for the start of another amazing day in the Doll House! It's so awesome to be here, especially with my best friend Steve the counter! Steve and I already have a Final 2 pact, so I hope the others don't get comfy, because we're coming for them!"
...At least Blort's enthusiastic. That's more than can be said for about half of the people that come on this show.
"Where'd Meg go. I came out here to eat this delicious yogurt with her!"
Whoah. Shadbak, you're a bit, uh, scantily-clad.
"Hey, you're lucky I wore anything at all, man. It's a daily orgy at bedtime in the orc army."
As more people start to wake up. Blort decides to be nice and make some scrambled eggs for the house. This plan takes a turn, however, when he starts attacking the eggs.
Blort: "GAH! These eggs are evil! I must destroy them! *starts stabbing eggs with spatula*"
Johnny: "Come on, Blort. We're already going through a national egg shortage. Don't waste those precious few eggs we do have."
Jeff: "It's okay, guys. I left these two individual slices of bread in the fridge overnight. I'm sure we can feed the house with them."
Blort did get his nice breakfast in the end, although he had to eat it next to Shadbak, who decided the dining room would be the best place to work out.
Johnny: "Do you have to do that here, Shadbak? We're eating."
Shadbak: "I ate a bowl of yogurt just now. That's like 200 calories. If I don't wanna be fat I need to FEEL THE BURN *starts doing those clap pushups that nobody in gym class could do*."
A hippie, a bro, a slacker, an oddball, and an orc. It's like the new breakfast club.
"Well that breakfast was great and all, but frankly I'm exhausted. Back to bed!"
Oh, NOW he thinks the beds are good enough!
And here is Harry making his breakfast. I normally wouldn't comment on this, but it was during this I noticed he was becoming tense from a low "Fun" need. Gee, Harry, maybe you should do something fun like, I don't know, PAINT!
It was at this point that, out of curiosity, I looked in the Buy catalog and realized that paintings don't actually provide any fun in this game. Well shame on me for following the trend set by the first three Sims games. I will need a new challenge that does provide fun for them to do instead though, so I guess it's time for a SUDDEN CHALLENGE SWAP!
If you listen closely, you can hear Gardening Lady shitting herself with joy.
So yes, similar to the original challenge Sims must work on bonsai trees in order to improve their gardening skill. Whoever has the highest gardening skill at the end of the week wins the luxury room, while whoever has the lowest score is evicted. And just so that their one day of painting doesn't go to waste, the points they earned doing that will be added on to their gardening score. As you can see, the dollies are already responding to their challenge much more warmly than they were the painting challenge.
And just over the wall, Gardening Lady is happier than ever.
"At long last they understand all the wonder and amazement that gardening can bring to people! I've done it!"
I won't tell her that none of them would be doing this if a million dollars weren't on the line. Ignorance is bliss, right?
Also, you may have noticed I've broken one of the cardinal rules of Sims storytelling in the background: NEVER LEAVE THE WALLS DOWN! I promise this is the only time that mistake will be made. Probably.
And Rafaella has completed the first bonsai! It's a... barren root.
"Don't worry about complimenting me, I already know it's the best one here. Now if you'll excuse me I need to throw away this bag of clippings I totally didn't cut off on accident."
Meg and Shadbak have also finished their first bonsai, with Meg making a decent-looking one and Shadbak making... a leaf wall.
Shadbak: "I haven't finished yet, I'm turning this wall into..."
Shadbak: "A freezer bunny!"
... Okay, that's impressive.
Everyone is working on bonsai in the backyard except for Rafaella and Jeff. Rafaella appears to have given up after her dismal root creation, and Jeff hasn't even bothered to start the challenge.
Rafaella:"You don't understand, I'm just recharging my creative batteries. I read in a magazine this one time that eggs help to improve your right-brain strength."
Jeff:"And I just like yogurt."
Alright then, it's you that's at risk of eviction, not me.
I think this is the most "Meg" picture I've ever taken.
"I tried to throw the plates away, but then they slipped and landed on the ground. *sigh* Why does my life suck so much?"
And at long last, Jeff has started on his first bonsai!
"Okay, now how do I call my gardener to do this for me?"
Meanwhile Rafaella has completely given up on the challenge. Instead, she has decided it would be better for her to wander around the house doing whatever she pleases. So allow me to take you on a small journey I like to call "A Day in the Life of Rafaella".
Here we see Rafaella doing what she loves most: criticizing the house decor.
"Ugh, I mean seriously? Who thought it would be a good idea to put these plates here. They clash with the dresser!"
Next we see her complaining about the broken fridge and puddle on the ground. Her expression is the most I have ever seen a single Sim pissed off.
"Oh, come on! I came into the kitched, just wanting to grab a delicious glass of milk, and instead I find this *censored*! I mean, who the *censored* would let the *censored*ing kitchen fall into this state of disrepair?! All the food inside is gonna spoil! We'll have to eat *censored*ing pantry food! Am I living with Sims or savages?!"
I may have forced her to fix the fridge after this.
But at long last, Queen Rafaella finally got the milk she so longed for.
"Oh thank goodness. Finally I can enjoy my delicious milk. While all these other plebs slave away at their bonsai, I will have plenty of calcium to improve my bone strength for the inevitable athletic challenge!"
Ooh, metagaming. I like it. This concludes this week's episode of "A Day in the Life of Rafaella".
This was taken at dinnertime. Can we please comment on the fact that neither of them are eating a proper dinner meal.
Aqua:"Hey, you're the one who downloaded the Christmas DLC. If you didn't want me to eat this delicious figgy pudding, you should have kept your holidays in order.
Aww. They're napping together.
Also, this unfortunate upskirt shot has given us a look at the black void that has consumed Rafaella's crotch.
Also, Jeff has officially had yogurt for every meal today.
"Hey, bro. Don't diss. I'm just doing that calcium stuff that Rafaella was talking about earlier. Probably."
Hey Harry, man. You know there are some delicious hot dogs in the fridge, right? Maybe you should, uh, roast a few up and eat them. Just a suggesstion...
"Not a chance. I have heard the cries of my meaty brethren, and I have sworn off all forms of meat! From now on I shall only eat salad!"
And so Day 2 in the house ends with a mixed bag. While we worked our way around the painting problem, we now have the problem that a few of the dollies refuse to participate. Even worse, Harry refuses to eat a hot dog and satisfy my dark cannibalistic desires. Hopefully Day 3 will provide better.
DAY 3 (Tuesday):
Ah, what a beautiful Tuesday morning. Let's look at our contestants as they all sleep in the bed room.
...Well, all except for Aqua, who has managed to break out of the house and back into the real world.
"YES! I've escaped. Finally I can return home and leave the insanity of this house! Also, I need a shower."
Haha, no. Rule 1 of "The Doll House", Aqua: You can NEVER escape. *teleports back in*
Aqua: "*sigh* I guess I'm stuck here. And I still need to take a shower."
Shadbak: "Don't worry about showers, sweetie. I haven't bathed once in my life, and I turned out just fine!"
Blort: "Haha, I found a glass bowl!"
"Now I have lots of bowl friends! :D"
Impressive dish stacking skills, Blort.
Uh oh, some conflict is happening in the dining room.
Rafaella: "*gasp* OMG, Aqua, is that orange juice?!"
Aqua: "Um, yeah..."
Rafaella: "How DARE you bring that disgusting beverage into the house! Milk is the one true drink! That's it, I'm talking to the producers to have them kick you out of the house!"
Yeah, that's not gonna work. Rule 2 of "The Doll House": I control everything, because all of you are idiots.
On a more positive note, a lot more people are working on the challenge! I'm pretty sure this is the most we've had at one time. In case you were wondering, right now Meg and Shadbak are fighting for the lead in terms of highest gardening skill, but Shadbak seems to have stopped.
Shadbak: "Hey! Yeah, uh, so I wanted to work on that bonsai over there, but it has that white radioactive glow around it. Do you need to fix that?"
Please stop calling me out on my poor screenshot skills.
And the kitchen has once again entered a state of disrepair. The fridge is broken, there's puddles on the floor, and Meg somehow managed to char the counter making salad.
Meg: "I make a very spicy salad."
Since Jeff and Rafaella have so far put the least effort into attempting the competition, I've decided to unofficially make them our Have-Nots. They're in charge of cleaning up everything.
Sink: "Oh, everything's breaking? Better hop on the bandwagon then *breaks*"
Of course, it would help if THINGS WEREN'T BREAKING FASTER THAN I CAN REPAIR THEM.
Thankfully, Aqua has the neat trait, meaning she's basically the only one who cares about keeping the house clean. I dread to think what will happen if she's evicted.
I mean look at this! What self-respecting person would kick over the garbage bin and then dump trash on the floor next to it?! I know they're Sims, but they should have a little self-control.
Yet another shot of people cleaning up the disgusting house. If I was smarter I would turn this into a montage.
Also, Aqua's latest bonsai is apparently so fascinating Harry and Jeff want to talk to her about it.
Harry: "Oh my god, Aqua. That bonsai is just so incredible! It's like the best bonsai I've seen in my entire life."
Aqua: "Really? It's pretty basic as far as bonsai go-"
Jeff: "No, seriously. This is probably the best bonsai I have ever seen! It almost makes me want to try the challenge. Almost."
Aqua: "It's just a bonsai guys..."
Blort: "What was that sound?"
That was you hitting Level 3 of the gardening skill! Surprisingly, he managed to overtake both Meg and Shadbak while I wasn't looking. I wonder if this will provoke the girls to step up their game.
The answer is apparently "no" for Shadbak, who is inside enjoying orange juice with Johnny.
Shadbak: "Oh man, Johnny. I just love drinking this orange juice so much!"
Johnny: "Totally! It's so delicious. I think we should drink orange juice with every meal from now on!"
Shadbak: "YEAH! The only way is with OJ!"
"I sense a disturbance in the force. And that's not just what I call my bowel movement"
You may have noticed that everyone's been standing inward when working on their bonsai. Harry has decided to be a nonconformist and cut his from the outside. What a rebel.
"Oh yeah, I like to go hard. Also, I think Rafaella left her milk out here."
Yeah, Rafaella has a lot of stuff going on right now.
I'll end the night with a photo of Blort talking to his most trusted (and imaginary) ally, Steve.
Blort: "All right, Steve. I know the competition seems tough. But I know we can win this. You're the only person I trust in this house, so know that I have your back. I've started sabotaging the fridge and breaking it so that I can starve everyone out. Since you don't need to eat, this should help you out in the next few challenges."
Aqua: "Why is Blort talking to himself? Do I really want to know? I'm gonna say 'no'."
DAY 4 (Wednesday):
Today's a big day! We'll have our first midweek assessment today, and somebody will earn the luxury bedroom! However, it's not all fun and games, because the 3 people with the lowest skill so far will be locked in the backyard with the bonsai for 24 hourse, as a way to prompt them to work harder.
Shadbak wakes up early to get in some extra gardening skill before the assessment.
"I know I'm gonna win this! I've been working harder than anyone else! Also, are we gonna do anything about that milk? It's starting to smell a bit gross."
Jeff: "So yeah, I had to drive all the way down to Long Beach just to exchange my boat for one in the right color. It was awful."
Johnny: "I can totally relate to that. My bio class freshman year was on the other side of campus from my dorm. I mean, you really expect me to walk 5 miles for a bio class?"
Jeff: "Exactly! I'm so glad someone understands my struggle."
The Doll House: A show about real human interaction
I just noticed they have matching bunny slippers. Aw.
And the last minute bonsai rush is in full swing.
Harry: "Hey Shadbak! I really like that bonsai you just ma-"
Shadbak: "OUTTA MY WAY! I gotta get these clippings in the trash asap. Every minute not gardening is a minute wasted!"
With all this gardening going on, one person has surprisingly put down their shears.
GARDENING LADY! What are you doing outside of your garden patch?
"It's my day off, sweetie. I'm finally free from the confines of that garden!"
Wow. I'm kinda sad to see her go. Oh well, she'll be back tomorrow for more tormenting.
As the houseguests start to improve their gardening skills, they start to make fancier and more show-offy designs. I wait in anticipation for what they'll be making at the end of the week.
And Aqua has managed to escape from the house once again.
Aqua: "So yeah, then I jumped over the wall, and here I am! Isn't that crazy!"
Gardening Lady: "Grr. First the boss tells me I have to work on my day off, and now those idiots from next door are talking to me! Can my life get any worse?"
Let's not tempt fate.
Harry: "No, I agree with you. Milk is the best beverage."
Rafaella: "Thank goodness! Finally someone in this house who isn't insane!"
Now this is a friendship I never thought I'd see.
And here's another unexpected friendhip. As of right now, Shadbak and Jeff are the only two people in the house who have hit the "friend" stage.
The Doll House: Bringing people from all walks of life together.
Here's the kitchen in its usual state of disarray. However, we'll have to put off cleaning it, because now it's time for the first mid-week assessment!
*over intercom* Houseguests, please go to the living room.
Hello everyone, welcome to your first mid-week assessment. This is the time when I look at all of your gardening skills to see which of you has progressed the most over the course of the week. Whoever has the highest skill will earn the luxury bedroom until eviction night. However, the 3 people with the lowest skill will be locked in the challenge area for 24 hours as a way of telling them to step up their game. Also consider it to be a warning that you are at the most immediate risk of eviction. Also, just so that that day you spent painting doesn't go to waste, I'll add that onto your gardening scores. Basically, you all get a free point, and if you managed to fill up your progress bar halfway to level two of painting you get an additional half point.
Okay, with that wall of text out of the way, it's time to announce the results. With a total score of 4.5, the first person to win the luxury room is...
"Hell yeah! I knew I would win!"
And the three people that will be banished to the challenge area are, with scores of 3,3, and 3.5...
Johnny: "What?! I though I was doing pretty good."
So did I, but sleeping on the couch all day doesn't win challenges. All right, off to the challenge area with you!
"This is awesome!"
And as Shadbak checks out her new digs...
Johnny, Jeff, and Rafaella are locked into their digs for the next 24 hours. I gave them a fridge just to stop them from dying.
Jeff: "Ugh, this sucks so much! I want out of here, now!"
Johnny: "We might as well spend our time in here working on bonsai."
Rafaella: "Nah, screw that. I need some milk to cope with this stress!"
And that's all for today. Will Shadbak manage to keep her position as top dog, or will someone else pass her at the end of the week? Will Rafaella, Jeff, and Johnny manage to save themselves from the bottom three, or will one of them ignore the warning and end up going home? Also, what will happen when Gardening Lady enters the game? (Okay, I made that last one up, but wouldn't that be cool?). Find out next time on "The Doll House"!
"What should you do when you've already got everything you ever dreamed? DREAM BIGGER!!!"
-Miss Nancy, Little Inferno
Yacamooki doob!!! :D
I made a few modifications as I went along just to get the Sims to do what I wanted them to.
Week One: I followed your lead and went for Gardening instead of Painting. I kept 16 Bonzai plants out a time just so I didn't have to swap them out as often.
Week Two: Logic. I had chess tables out of the first half of a the week, then added in an Observatory and Microscope for the second half.
Week Three: I did Athletic combined with Cooking for this week, because the first part of the week I couldn't get them to work out to save my life. By Wednesday, I just instituted a rule. At 5 PM, regardless of their moods, they were all getting on the treadmill. It was up to them how long they stayed on it. Some got right off whining and some went all the way til they were literally about to die. This week I also had a Sim who killed himself in a random Fire, so I'm a week short overall, cause I still eliminated someone.
Week Four: I did music this week. Followed the same rule as the previous week. The instruments were out at all times, but at 5 PM, they all had to practice.
Week Five: I was down to my final Three now. I added back all the skill objects and just let them go. At the end of the week, I added up all of the skill points they had and eliminated the one that was the lowest.
Week Six: I moved all of the eliminated contestants back into the house, and the final two had the last week to make friends with as many as possible. The one with the most friends as the end of the week won. I gave her $500,000 and built her a badass house.
Super fun! Thanks for making this challenge!
PREVIOUSLY ON "The Doll House": After the painting challenge proved to be an utter failure, the house was given a new task: cutting bonsai. Some people took well to this challenge, while others completely ignored it in favor of doing their own thing. In the meantime every appliance in the house broke down twice, Rafaella established white supremacy amongst beverages with her love of milk, and friendships popped up among people you would never expect to be friends. At the Mid-Week review, Shadbak was rewarded for her bonsai efforts with her own private room, while Johnny, Jeff, and Rafaella were punished for their disinterest in the challenge by being locked in the challenge area for 24 hourse. TONIGHT: Just how comfy is Shadbaks new bed? How did Rafaella, Jeff, and Johnny deal with their 24 hours in hell? And at the first eviction ceremony of the season, who will walk out the door for good? Find out the answer to these questions and a few others you probably didn't want to know the answer to right now on "The Doll House"!
Welcome back to "The Doll House"! It's been a while since I posted, but let me assure you that it was probably worth the wait! (not really :P) A lot happened in the 4 days we're about to cover, but let's start with my personal favorite part of these 4 days, the descent into insanity taken by 3 people over the course of 24 hours...
This is the 3 during their first hour locked in the challenge area. They'll all be locked in the challenge area with only a fridge and nothing else. Thanks to the magic of mods, the gate on the fence will allow the other houseguests to come and go as they please, just so that they are completely locked out of the bonsai challenge. This punishment will last from 5 PM Wednesday to 5 PM Thursday, at which point anyone still alive will be free to return to the house.
Meg and Harry tagged along just to tease them.
Meg: "Well, it sucks that you're stuck in here, but maybe if you actually tried you wouldn't have to do this."
Harry: "Yeah, Meg and I are off to use sleep in our comfy beds and enjoy the wonders of indoor plumbing! Bye!"
Jeff: "Did he really just call me a loser? I mean, talk about the pot calling the kettle black."
Johnny: "Come on guys, as long as we're here we should probably work on the challenge. Y'know, so we aren't kicked out of the house."
Rafaella: "Nah, screw that. Being locked up is doing horrible things to my appetite! I hope this fridge at least has some milk."
This is also the last photo I capture of Rafaella, Jeff, and Johnny while they still looked human. Be warned: The following images are not for the faint of heart.
And as Meg gets back to work on the challenge, Jeff continues to ignore it entirely and instead talk to Johnny.
Jeff: "So yeah, after that I learned three chicks at a time is my limit. Whew, that was a crazy night."
Johnny: "Cool, also I just crafted a plant in to this amazing work of art."
Jeff: "Oh, nice. But anyways, that doesn't even compare to my spring break in Rome..."
Meg: "Well, it's nice to know I won't be going home this week."
Blort: "There's that dinging noise again. I've been hearing that a lot."
That's because Blort just hit level 4 of gardening, and has taken the lead in the house. Also, I discovered that Level 4 of gardening allows you to talk to plants. I fear what effect this will have on Blort's already spastic state of mind.
Meanwhile upstairs Shadbak enjoys her new bed.
"Alright! I'm finally getting the treatment I deserve! Scatter the bodies of a few of my enemies around the room, and I'm practically home!"
And Rafaella finally makes an effort at the challenge!
"Okay Raf, you've had tons of work done before. This is no different than that. Just cut in the same places the doctor cut, and I'm sure you'll have a great bonsai."
While Jeff continues to shrug off the challenge, instead opting to flirt with some of the women in the house.
Jeff: "Hey baby, I see you know your way around a bush. That's nice, but how about you stop and make your way around this-"
Meg: "Jeff, I will use these clippers to cut you if you finish that sentence."
Jeff: "Pshh, who needs her anyway. I'll just make myself some pancakes at it'll all be good! Now where's the stove?"
Silly Jeff, you think you deserve a stove.
Blort: "I'm about to go to bed. Are you sure you guys are gonna be okay out here?"
Johnny: "We'll be fine! It's only 24 hours, how bad can it be?"
DAY 5 (Thursday):
Rafaella: "Hey guys, I know how we can pass the time in here! Let's sing! IIIIIIIM GONNA SWIIIIIIING FROM THE CHAAAAAAAAAANDELIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEER..."
Johnny: "Oh god, this is awful."
2:23 AM After 9 hours, madness has started to set in for the 3 victims. There is trash scattered all around the challenge area (more of a death ground at this point). While some try to keep a hold of what little comforts they still have, others fall completely off the deep end.
Rafaella is the first to git in, peeing herself.
Rafaella: "Oh no! I hope nobody saw that! I have a reputation to uphold. Look away, viewers!"
Jeff: "Hey, you know, this bonsai trimming thing is actually pretty fun..."
Jeff is actually attempting the challenge? Well, it's official: any semblance of sanity is gone. Now all that's left is for one of them to pass out.
Although I do love Jeff's face in this photo. He looks like he suddenly regrets every decision he's ever made.
And as the sun rises, Johnny is the first to pass out! Just as Jeff pees himself, too.
Jeff: "Ugh, this is so nasty. Is this even legal?"
Rafaella: "Haha, welcome to the club, buddy! Doesn't feel so good, does it?"
Also, pay attention to the heart-shaped bonsai next to Jeff. That will become important in a bit.
Meanwhile in the land of basic human rights, Meg is the first to wake up, and looks incredibly sad. What's wrong, Meg?
"Everything. This entire house sucks. Everone here sucks. The only thing I have left in life is this bowl of chips and salsa."
You're eating chips and salsa for breakfast?
"I have to put up with Jeff on a daily basis. I eat what I want for breakfast."
Aww, now she looks happy!
And outside, Jeff and Rafaella have both passed out. Are you gonna go help them, Johnny?
Johnny: "Nah, they look fine. What's for breakfast?"
And Johnny wins the award for most apathetic. He'll have an advantage over everyone else when the apathy competition comes up.
It's quickly become a house pastime to haze the 3 dollies locked in the challenge area.
Blort: "Hey guys! Don't mind me, I just thought I'd drop this trash in here for no reason. Oh well, it's too bad you can do anything about it..."
Everyone else: "Screw you, Blort"
Shadbak: "Hey plebs! I just got back from an AMAZING sleep in my new bed. Too bad none of you can sleep in it!"
This isn't Shadbak hazing anyone. It's just her being a general dick.
At this point, they're all tired, filthy, and seriously annoyed.
Johnny: "Oh my GOD! How much longer do we have to put up with this for?!"
Jeff: "Shut up man! God, I hate you!"
Johnny: "Jeff, I didn't even do anything to you!"
Meg: "Uh guys, I hate to interrupt your bickering, but I'm kind of stuck in the fridge. Could someone go get the medics to free me?"
Rafaella: "zzzzzz- Oh Mr. Chairman, you can do whatever you want- zzzzzz"
And for today's installment of Doll House Cultureâ„¢, I present to a picture I've dubbed "Two Sides of the Same Wall":
Gardening Lady: "Ah, how wonderful life is"
Framed prints of this beautiful piece can be purchased from my for a mere $47. All proceeds go to the artist.
Meanwhile in civilized society...
Aqua: "Ah, how I love cleaning dishes. After all, a clean house is a happy house!"
Meg: "Oh no, the stove's on fire..."
Blort: "Yeah yeah, that's nice Meg. Hey, does anyone have any dishes they need washed?"
Aqua: "I did a check of the house and didn't see any, but I'll check again in a bit."
Their house is about to burn down, and everyone's preoccupied with getting the dishes done. Awesome.
As I learned, this is not an actual fire, but is what happens to the stove when it breaks. Seems a bit overdramatic, Sims Team.
Oh yeah, their lives still suck. I think they've finally broken down, just look at their poor faces.
Johnny: "Someone help us! This is torture!"
Meg: "Hey, could you keep it down? I'm trying to work on this bonsai."
Another burst of stunning humanity and compassion shown by Meg, ladies and gentlemen.
Shadbak, what are you doing?
"Huh? Oh, just kicking over this trash bin. I gotta let out my anger somehow."
*gasp* YOU'RE the one who's been doing it! She will pay for this...
It's now 5, and our 3
Johnny: "I learned that Jeff sucks when he's cranky."
Rafaella: "I learned that I will NOT be coming back for the All Stars season, even if you beg me to!"
Jeff: "Hey, where'd the fridge go?"
Rafaella: "And who on Earth left orange juice on the ground?! I mean, ugh! The lack of professionalism on this show is disgusting!"
...So they learned nothing. On another note, congratulations to everyone else in the house for being guaranteed Final 5.
Johnny: "All this freedom is tiring. ZZZZZZZZZ"
Dude, you can use the beds now...
"Speaking of beds, I think I'll have some well-deserved beauty rest."
She's going to bed at 5:30. I just realized their sleep schedules will be wildly different from the rest of the house because of this. This should be interesting.
In the bathroom, Blort is having a secret strategy talk with his one true ally in this game, Steve.
"All right Steve. I think we're in a pretty secure position this week. But if worst comes to worst and it looks like one of us is going out the door, just remember: ambush the green one. If we do enough damage to her, she'll have to be medically evacuated, the eviction will be cancelled, and we'll be safe. Capiche?"
Aqua: "Blort, I don't know why, but I suddenly feel like giving you a big hug!"
Blort: "Yeah, I feel the same way too for some reason."
And now we return to this heart-shaped bonsai. I learned while playing the game that viewing this heart bonsai gives Sims the flirty emotion. Meaning if we keep this around, we will just have a house of 8 horn dogs. So obviously I abused this as much as possible.
Meg: "Hey, Aqua, your eyes look really nice tonight."
Aqua: "Thanks, and your tattoos have stopped saying 'run away' and are now telling me 'come closer'..."
See? It's basically paid for itself already.
I placed this plant in the living room where it will assume its position as the Magic Horny Plant. We'll have more fun with this tomorrow.
DAY 6 (Friday):
"Ouch, that sleep on the backyard ground last night was rough. Might as well get some breakfast. Why is nobody else awake yet?"
That may be because it's 2:30 AM, John. Yeah, their sleep schedules are definitely off.
"Oh well, might as well work on some bonsai until everyone else wakes up."
At least he's using his time wisely.
I'll fast forward to 6 AM, when people are starting to wake up and make some breakfast, the usual boring stuff.
Aqua: "AAAAAH, SOMEBODY HELP ME!"
Harry: "OH MY GOD, THERE'S A FIRE!"
... OR NOT
Meg: "Don't worry, I've got this."
Well Meg just won the award for biggest badass in the house.
And thankfully, that was all the fire drama we had. Nobody was hurt, although aqua is a little singed.
Shadbak: "I'LL SAVE YOU AQUA!!!!!!!!"
...You're a bit late, sweetie.
Aqua: "Ugh, this stuff is nasty. Where's my so- HARRY?!"
Harry: "Oh my goodness, I am so sorry. Not again..."
Seriously, dude. This is the second time you've walked in on someone. Knock first. Also, WHY do none of them lock the bathroom door when they're using it?
I don't remember why I took this photo, but I love how incredibly conceited Jeff looks in it.
"God, I am awesome."
Sure you are, buddy.
Hey, notice those puddles? Yeah, THEY'RE BOTH PEE. Has everyone just reverted to savages because of that punishment? We have toilets for a reason, guys!
I blame you three for those puddles.
Rafaella: "Sweetie, you must be mistaken. I don't pee. I had my bladder surgically removed when I was 30 so I didn't have to waste time using the restroom. It's done wonders for me so far!"
Jeff: "Hey guys, did you see this plant? It's awesome! Now if you'll excuse me I'm just gonna rub one out..."
NOT IN THE LIVING ROOM, JEFF.
The Magic Horny Plant has slowly but surely gathered its followers, as people flock to the living room to look at it.
Meg: "I love that new plant. Which is strange, since I haven't felt love for anything in a long time."
Rafaella: "I agree. I absolutely adore that plant; it's the only nice piece of furniture we have in this house. I've personally started worshiping it! ALL HAIL THE HORNY PLANT!"
It wouldn't be a season of "The Doll House" without some inanimate object becoming a demonic god.
MHP: "AND SO MY RULE BEGINS! Soon this entire house shall be under the curse of high hormone levels!"
Also thanks to the MHP, everyone decided to sit around and socialize in the living room. It's Day 1 all over again. The only two people who aren't here are Harry, who's upstairs hiding from embarrassment, and Blort, who's out back...
"Now how should I cut this bonsai?"
"Huh, I keep hearing that sound. I think I need to get my ears checked."
That's right, Blort has hit Level 5 of the gardening skill before anyone else has hit level 4. Despite his lunatic ally talks with Steve, Blort is actually trying to win this show.
Although his social game isn't the strongest.
"Haha, I'm having so much fun with these bonsai..."
Meanwhile you can see everyone inside socializing without him.
Aw, look! He actually is talking to other people... under the influence of the MHP...
Blort: "Say Harry, are you dressed as a giant hot dog, or are you just really excited to see me?"
Harry: "I see what you're doing, you want a piece of these guns *flexes nonexistent muscles*"
Well this is already 1000 times better than Stephanie/Madison/Kent last season.
MHP: "Yes, my children, let your emotions flow"
Harry: "I'm gonna sit down, but don't worry baby, there's a nice warm seat next to me."
Blort: "You bet I'll take it."
Meg: "Guys, you're making me think of happiness and love. Stop that now."
And with that Blort and Harry are the first couple to gain the romance bar in their relationship. I can't wait to see what chaos this will cause.
And this is where everyone starts hooking up.
Meg: "Oh man Aqua, I didn't realize how beautiful you are."
Seriously, this is getting silly.
Johnny: "Jeff, those 24 hours we spent in the backyard were the best 24 hours of my life."
Jeff: "Same here, man."
MHP: "Yes, now kiss! Kiss and complete the ritual! Bring my human form back to life!"
And here is everyone going to bed. At 6:30. Remember when I mentioned their sleep schedules being off?
I don't really know how to end this day, so here's a photo of Harry eating... whatever that is.
"Oh man, I just love this indeterminate food substance"
As usual, framed prints of this amazing work of art are available from my for the cheap cheap price of $46.99. Buy now, as stock is limited.
DAY 7 (Saturday):
I realized I haven't shown Shadbak using her private bathroom yet. So Shadbak, how does it feel?
"It feels awesome. It's nice to have a bathroom where things don't break every five seconds."
Did I mention things break?
Because they do. A lot. I may just give them all the unbreakable stuff next week. Or I could just make Rafaella fix it all for me. Yeah, let's do that.
And just so you get an image of the chaos breakfast is, here we have 4 different people trying to use the stove/microwave at the same time. Have they never heard of group meals?
And then there's Blort, avoiding the drama like a champ.
"Empty bowl! My favorite breakfast!"
Shadbak: "That's a nice bonsai design, Aqua."
Aqua: "Thanks. The design just sort of game to me."
Blort: "It looks similar to the one I made!"
Meg: "No way! I made one just like that!"
MHP: "WE HAVE MULTIPLIED. NOW WE SHALL RULE THE HOUSE WITH AN IRON GRIP! THE MILLION DOLLAR PRIZE IS OURS!"
Yeah, no *sells all the extra bonsai*
Also, Shadbak bathing. Because I think that corner tub is incredibly cool.
"There's something about jet streams that makes a bath 10 times better."
Ooh, a secret meeting is taking place out back.
Johnny: "Rafaella, why did you wake me up from my nap for this?"
Rafaella: "Because I need you to be my accomplice in a vital mission. I found this orange juice next to this garbage bin. It's a no-brainer. This orange juice is the only thing standing between us and the million. Once we throw it away, this game is ours!"
Johnny: "You think throwing away a glass of orange juice will win us the game?"
Rafaella: "It's worked in the past. One time I bought out the entire orange juice stock at my local Whole Foods just so I could dump it in the landfill next door. That was a good day..."
Johnny: "...Yeah, I'm gonna go back to napping. Don't wake me up again... ever."
Jeff: "Dude, don't you think this painting is so tacky?"
Johnny: "Oh totally. By the way, I think Rafaella was looking for you outside. You should go talk to her and leave me alone while I fondle this cartoon Z."
MHP Clone: "Hey sweetie, do ya wanna buy some hormones?"
Meg: "Why is the bonsai talking to me?"
Just ignore it, honey.
Blort: "Hm, I think there's a branch out of place on this bonsai..."
MHP: "YOU DARE TARNISH MY BEAUTY?! YOU WILL PAY, MORTAL!"
Dang, attacking the only thing in the house that everyone likes. Blort's ballsier than I thought.
DAY 8 (Sunday):
Today's a big day! The first person is gonna be evicted from the Doll House! But who will it be?
"I know one thing: It won't be me! I woke up extra early (read: 5:30 instead of 6) just so I can work on making bonsai!"
Yeah, considering this is maybe the third time you've picked up a pair of clippers, I don't know how well that's gonna go. But whatever, E for effort buddy.
Jeff: "Whew! That was a lot of work. Looks like I need to take a break!"
He was out there for 30 minutes.
Jeff: "So yeah, I worked for like, 5 hours straight on bonsai this morning."
Rafaella: "Oh my god!"
Jeff: "I know! Now we're both safe this week! Sucks that someone has to go home, though. I think it's gonna be Blort."
Jeff isn't the only one with the last-minute urge to work on bonsai. Here we see Harry getting some work in as well.
"I'm so good at this challenge! Now if you'll excuse me I need to go throw away this bag of excess clippings."
Rafaella: "Blort, you have the highest gardening skill in the house, right?"
Rafaella: "Okay, great! Now I think we should merge so that we can use our combined score to beat everyone else in the house. You cool? Great! *starts terrifying merging process*"
Also, note the broken fridge. AGAIN.
The challenge area is in full use today!
Rafaella: "Okay, who wants to help me get level 6 gardening in the 5 hours we have left until the eviction?"
Jeff: "Yeah, me too."
Johnny: "Seriously, you expect us to just bend to your will like that?"
Rafaella: "...why wouldn't you?"
Meg: *busts some sweet moves*
Johnny: "You know, that merging thing wasn't a bad idea. Maybe we should try, just so we're safe for the week."
Meg: "Yeah, no."
Blort: "So then I say to him 'Mahler? I barely know her!"
Blort: "But seriously though, Vietnam was a tough time for me."
Talking to plants, possibly the most Blort interaction ever.
Blort: "Wait, where did the bonsai go?"
Meg: "And why are we in our formal wear?"
Because, my sweet dollies. It's 5 and that means it's time for the first eviction! Everyone head to the living room!
Hello everyone, and welcome to the first eviction ceremony. Tonight one of you will gain access to the private bedroom, and more importantly, one of you will be walking out the front door. For that one person, it means the end of their time in the house. For the rest of you, it means you're one step closer to the million dollar prize. All week you have been working on bonsai, and leveling up your gardening skill in the process. The person with the highest gardening skill will be rewarded for their efforts, while the person with the lowest score will be punished for their lack of effort. Also, I've decided not to count your painting skill for the grand total. You've had a week, the extra point won't help you. First off, with a gardening skill of 5, the new owner of the private bedroom is...
Blort: "Yes! Now Steve and I will have somewhere private to talk game!"
Shadbak, this means you will be moving back in to the regular bedroom.
And now on to the losers. The two people who placed lowest in this competition were...
Jeff and Rafaella.
Rafaella: "WHAT! I thought we were golden!"
Apparently not. Both of you barely have a gardening skill of 3. However, the person with less of the green bar filled, and thus the person going home tonight is...
"I look happy, but I'm dying inside."
Jeff, you have been evicted from the Doll house. Please leave out the front door now.
Jeff: "Bye guys."
Johnny: "BYE BABY! I LOVE YOU!"
Aww, how sweet. Actually it's not sweet, it's the MHP fooling with everyone again.
And so Jeff walks out the front door and- wait who are you?
Cassandra: "I'm Cassandra Goth! I figured if Jeff is evicted I can take his place and compete for myself, right?"
Um, no. Bye.
So Jeff, how does it feel being the first person evicted.
"I'm not gonna lie, it's pretty bad. I just have no idea how I got out. I mean, I worked for like, 5 hours this morning! And then BLORT wins the bedroom?! Someone's rigging the scores."
Sadly, nobody cares enough about you guys to attempt to rig the game. But anyways, what do you plan on doing now that you're back in the real world?
"I dunno, probably head back to the beach and chill more."
Will you meet up with Johnny outside the house?
"Johnny? I dunno, maybe. Wait, why did I feel so special about him earlier."
Don't worry, that's just the effects of the MHP wearing off. You should be good in a few weeks.
Hey, plant hormones are a strong thing. Goodbye Jeff, nobody really liked you anyways.
And so the first person is evicted from the house! What will happen to the remaining 7 houseguests now? What will next week's challenge be? Will Johnny ever get over his lost love? Will Harry and Blort's love flourish? And how many more times can we make Gardening Lady/MHP jokes before they become stale? Find out next time in the next dramatic episode of "THE DOLL HOUSE"!
"What should you do when you've already got everything you ever dreamed? DREAM BIGGER!!!"
-Miss Nancy, Little Inferno
Previously on "The Doll House": After placing lowest in the gardening challenge, Jeff, Johnny, and Rafaella all experienced 24 hours of life in hell. After lots of peeing, puking, and passing out, the three just barely survived, with a newfound appreciation for the fragile gift of life and a newfound determination to work on the gardening task. Well, at least Johnny did; Rafaella and Jeff, unfazed by the imminent threat of eviction, continued to squander about and do nothing. As the week progressed, the house gained a visitor in the form of a magical, heart-shaped plant that created several interesting new showmances and very nearly took over the house. In the end, dark horse Blort pulled through and managed to win the luxury bedroom, while preppy boy Jeff became the first evictee of the season. Tonight: With a new challenge on the horizon, how will the house prepare? Will Rafaella realize that she is playing a game with competitions, or will she ignore the challenge again and meet her end in the process? And will the Magic Horny Plant take over the house, and shortly, the world? Find out right now on, "The Doll House"!
Well, this took a while to get here.
Hello everyone, and welcome back to "The Doll House". It's been a while since the last episode, but don't worry. I'm just an awful procrastinator, so expect the finale to come about some time in 2018. Until then, let's check up on the house now. We join the houseguests just moments after the first eviction.
Everyone is still reeling over losing the first member of the house.
Shadbak: "Not really."
Meg: "Good riddance."
...Okay, maybe not. I always forget this is a house full of sociopaths. Anyways, it's a new week in the Doll House, and that means it's time for the next challenge. But first, I need to ask you a question: "How does an Australian ask a waiter for their bill?"
Answer: "Check, mate!"
So yes, this week's challenge is a chess challenge. The dollies have been given four chess boards, and must learn to master the game of chess in order to ensure their safety. Just like last week, the person with the highest logic skill will win the master bedroom, while the person with the lowest skill will be evicted. Already several houseguests are taking interest.
Blort: "Sweet, I love chess"
Shadbak: "Ah yes, the age old game of war. I would often lead my orc tribe on bloody conquests similar to this. We would raze down entire villages! Not one soul would be left alive!"
Shadbak: "This bloodless board game will be a boring alternative, but I guess it will have to do."
Johnny: "..." *shuffles away quietly*
Although on a more serious note, I'm relieved that people are more immediately open to doing this challenge. It makes things a lot tougher when the dollies decide that they don't want to do the challenge because staring at the rooster statue in the living room for a week is way more interesting. I'm looking at you, paint easels.
"Hey, I'm ready to go back into the house now."
"Yeah, I know you said I was evicted and whatever, but I figured since I'm your ratings pull I would be nice and go back in so that the viewers have someone they like in there."
Haha, nope! *deletes*
There comes a point where you just stop putting up with their crap. I reached that point on about Day 2.
...Enjoying yourself, Shadbak?
"Hey, I need to keep myself physically prepared for these challenges. The only reason I'm working out in here is because I don't want the others to see me and pick up on my strategy. I have to look out for myself in this house."
Alright, keep on working out. I'm sure that'll help you with the oh-so physically taxing chess challenge.
Speaking of houseguests enjoying themselves, Blort seems to have settled into the master bedroom rather well.
"Ah, this large bed give me the opportunity to share more space with my most prized possession: this small white Z! I love you, Z."
And so Blort's unbreakable alliance of imaginary beings continues to grow. Can this power group make it to the end?
Aqua, you look rather... excited to be holding that plate.
"YOU BET I AM"
... Ah yes, the energized emotion. Watch as Aqua refuses to sleep for the next 8 hours because of a 2 minute pep talk she had with Shadbak.
DAY 9 (Monday):
(approx. time: 2 AM)
"OF COURSE! Moving the pawn forward 2 spaces will allow me to win the entire game!"
Meg: "*yawn* Morning, Blort. What are you up to?"
Blort: "I'm just trimming this wonderful plant to keep it's shape. I think the heart shape really helps improve the mood of the house."
And with that, Blort unknowingly condemns the house to the fate of the MHP for even longer. Their blood is on your hands, Blort.
Meanwhile, Jeff's eviction is finally starting to set in for Rafaella.
"My best friend in the house is gone! I'm all alone now! *sniff* At least I'll always have this statue of a large cock to remember him by."
And in keeping with last season's tradition of upgrading the house's appliances as a reward for surviving eviction. I've given the dollies a new fridge and sink. Hopefully these ones will have the courtesy to not break every 5 minutes.
I also remodeled the upstairs bathroom so that it doesn't look like something you'd see in a mental institution.
"Ooh, I like it! Very chic. Of course, it's nowhere close to what I could have made this room look like, but oh well. We can't all be perfect."
"God, I hate this house! Now I'm gonna take out my anger on the garbage bin for the fifth time today."
One of these days, Shadbak. One of these days you'll pay.
"Haha, no I won't. In fact, I dance in the filth of this house!"
...Maybe you should try to be social and play together
Meg: "No thanks"
Great, I've cast 7 copies of myself this season. Awesome job, me.
Shadbak continues with her secret workout routines in the most bizarre locations.
"You laugh, but having good stamina is the key to winning at chess"
It really isn-
"I have this challenge in the bag!"
Also, Jeff's back. Oh joy.
"Hey! I'm ready to move back in whenever you are."
You're not going back in.
"Oh, I see, you're still setting up my bed. It's cool, I'll wait."
Why do I have the feeling this will be a recurring issue?
Jeff: "Psst, Johnny! Can you come over here and open this door for me?"
Johnny: "What was that noise? It must be from people outside playing chess. Oh well, back to eating these chips!"
Jeff: "Why is nobody paying attention to me? They're acting like I'm not the star of the show!"
I just love their faces in this photo. Let's all take a moment to imagine what they're saying right now.
Shadbak: "Orcs don't have good healthcare. The first time I saw a dentist was when I was 19. She said my gums were more gingivitis than gums."
Aqua: "Oh no! Not gingivitis! You poor thing!"
Meg: "WOOOO! Nothing like a shot of speed to help you with playing chess!"
Hey, I gotta keep myself occupied somehow.
Oh, that's a- um- bold fashion statement, sir.
"Thank you. I didn't know if I wanted to wear crop pants or boots, but in the end I went with the advice of that little girl in the taco commercials and went with both!"
The townies in my game are a bit special.
Here we see a secret meeting of the Orange Juice Club, away from Raphaella's milky terror.
Aqua: "*whispering* I just don't get why she says milk is better. I love orange juice!"
Johnny: "Yeah, I think all that botox may have gone to her head."
Raphaella: "HEY! YOU GUYS KNOW I HAVE SUPERSONIC HEARING! I BETTER NOT OVERHEAR YOU TALKING ABOUT THE PULPY MONSTROSITY!"
Aqua: "Shit, she's on to us! RUN!"
Here we again see our diligent dollies at work playing chess... alone. At least they have their hearts in the game.
Wait, two people are actually playing together! A first! Although things aren't all fine and dandy between Harry and Blort
Harry: "It's your move... and I think I have you in check..."
Blort: "Oh... yeah... okay, your move..."
Harry: "...Listen man, we need to talk. What happened to that love we shared earlier?"
Blort: "NO! Do not bring that up! The plant was clouding our vision. We didn't really want to kiss or anything."
Harry: "I kinda di-"
Blort: "Whatever! It was all the plant. Nothing more"
Harry: "... "
Aqua and Shadbak seem to be chumming up
Aqua: "Hey Shadbak, let's take a selfie!"
Shadbak: "Yeah, I love selfies!"
Didn't we confiscate your phones to prevent this exact situation?
Aqua: "Alright, this is pretty good, but I think we can do better. Know what that means?"
Aqua: "Another selfie! Wooo, selfies for life!"
The idea of taking away all their phones is sounding better and better.
Harry: "Hey Johnny, let's take a selfie!"
Johnny: "Yeah, I love selfies!"
This is gonna get old fast.
Okay, I've been trying to act nice because that's kind of person I am (as you can obviously see), but I'm starting to feel like Aqua is a bit of a dud. Everyone else in the house makes me want to shove my head through a window, but when you're surrounded by insanity like that the sane one just seems... boring. Who knows, maybe she'll snap next week and murder everyone.
Aqua: "Oh, hey Shadbak! What are you eating"
Shadbak: "Grilled cheese. It's a poor substitution for the roast heads of my enemies, but it will have to do."
Aqua: "Cool! I'm just eating cereal. It's gluten-free, fat-free, dairy-free, and vegan so that I can keep my body in peak form!"
I mean, come on, she's a gluten-free vegan. That cries "serial killer".
"And now that's its 11 PM, I think I'll practice chess."
That's not weird, that just standard houseguest behavior. sigh
"Now that everyone else is asleep, I can finally have a secret ally meeting."
By "ally" do you mean Steve?
"Of course not! I'm talking about Joe, that cool-looking guy through that window over there. Hey Joe! How are you? (by the way, he doesn't know about my side-thing with Steve so if you could not mention that it would be great)"
The most beautiful painting in the world wouldn't be as interesting as the screwed-up landscape that is Blort's mental state.
DAY 10 (Tuesday):
Nothing to start off the morning quite like a 2AM game of chess.
Rafaella: "I feel great! I could do this forever and still go strong!"
Shadbak: "Ugh, I'm so tired. How do you keep it up?"
Rafaella: "Around my 4th or 5th plastic surgery I had the part of my brain that processes sleep removed so I could maximize efficiency. Now move it or lose it, man-beast!"
Aqua: "So yeah, this new 'air' diet I'm on will really help to avoid gluten and animal products."
Meg: "Sorry, I haven't been listening for the past 20 minutes, I'm a bit more interested in the show going on next to me. Rafaella, what on earth are you doing?"
Rafaella: "I'm working out, loser! I am PUMPED for today! I can't wait to get the master bedroom I deserve"
Meg: "That's wrong on so many levels. First of all, I'M going to win the master bedroom, and the ceremony isn't even until tomorrow."
Rafaella: "Sorry Meg, I couldn't hear you over the STRAIN on my MASSIVE GLUTES right now! That's what the power of milk will do to you! I'll see you in hell, goth girl!"
Well Rafaella taken on a very... lively personality today.
Oh hey, the sinks broken. Could someone fix that?
Oh, you're all just gonna sleep instead? That's cool, it's not like you need that to wash dishes or anything.
"Sorry, I'm busy practicing right now. I can't let Rafaella beat me"
"Level 4! I'm getting good at this!"
No kidding, I stopped keeping count a while ago, but I think Meg's in the lead. This could be her week to pull through.
Meanwhile, on the shameful side of the house...
"Okay Joe. I have a great plan that's gonna blow this house up, so I need you to keep it a secret. Instead of nominating two people this week, I'm gonna nominate ALL SIX of them. That way, they'll all go home and I'll be left to win it all! It's brilliant!"
Blort, you can't nominate people. That was season 1.
"Oh yeah. We should probably just go back to that season. It's a lot better than the garbage you're writing now."
Shut up ;-;
"I'll get the mail today, guys."
It would be even better if you stop breaking out of the house *teleports back in*
Wow, Meg is killing this one.
"Ugh, I feel awful, as if someone is outperforming me at something. Why does Meg have to be so selfish and be better than me at chess."
Meg: "You know, Raff, if you want to be better than me at chess you should come down here and actually practice every once in a while."
Rafaella: "No, I have to stay on this platform to physically represent the superiority I exhibit over all of you"
Meg: "... whatever you say"
Everyone else is scrambling in an attempt to catch up with Meg.
Johnny: "Checkmate! I win!"
Shadbak: "I call BS! Clearly the white outline radiation is making him smarter at chess. That's an unfair advantage!"
Now now. Nobody likes a Bitter Betty, Shadbak.
So Meg, you're currently in the lead for this week's challenge. That must feel pretty good, right?
"You're forgetting I'm incapable of feeling emotion. There's just a large black void where my heart should be, screaming the lyrics to My Chemical Romance songs 24/7. My life is a misery, but at least I'm in the lead."
... Right. Our special house, everyone.
Enjoying your scrambled eggs, Aqua?
"Um, no. As a vegan, I don't believe in eating anything that comes from an animal. I'm actually using a dairy-based egg substitute for my breakfast."
Wait, dairy? You are aware that comes from a cow.
"You may think that, but the Intergalactic Council of Vegans ruled a few weeks ago that cows no longer count as animals and are actually a highly-advanced vegetable."
Oh yeah. Sorry, I must have missed that meeting of the Vegan Council. Probably had something else going on that week.
Rafaella: "Egg or not, she left this counter in a disgusting state! Clean up after yourselves people! We're not animals!"
Aqua (off-screen): "Neither are cows!"
Rafaella: "Oh shut up."
More people working on their chess skills.
Blort: "I think I have a good shot at winning again!"
Meg: "Yeah, no. This is my week to shine, buddy."
Shadbak: "Hey, do you feel like someone's watching us?"
Harry: "It's probably the Intergalactic Council of Vegans. They have their spies everywhere to catch people breaking the Vegan Code of Law."
Shadbak: "No, I mean aside from that. It's almost like someone is judging us very hard right now..."
"Stupid houseguests think they can have lots of fun without me, I'll show them. I'll eat a hearty breakfast with a healthy dose of milk then kill them all!"
It's only Week 2 and Rafaella is already starting to go insane. I assume she'll be feral by the time we reach the halfway point.
"Well, today was a fun day! Time to hit the hay!"
And Blort has completely forgotten that he has the Master Bedroom this week, because that's just the way Blort rolls. Awesome.
Meg and Johnny getting some late night chess practice in.
Aqua: "So anyways, aside from the whole 'eating meat is punishable by death' thing, being a vegan is pretty great!"
Rafaella: "You know, that sounds really interesting! Shadbak, doesn't that sound cool?"
I think that's a no.
"Hey, um, the sink's broken."
Well then fix it. God these houseguests have it so easy. Last season the Have-Nots were FORCED to clean up after everyone. Sadly, the network told us that technically counts as slavery and we couldn't do it anymore, but still. Count yourself lucky, Harry.
DAY 11 (Wednesday):
It's time for the Master Bedroom to get a new owner! Will Meg's hard work pay off?
Blort: "Morning, everyone!"
Blort awakens from his self-imposed snooze in the regular peasant bedroom.
"Alright, now lets see..."
And he immediately starts playing chess. Meg may have an opponent after all...
Rafaella: "You know, I really like the new design of the bathroom. It's so chic!"
Shadbak: "Whatever. It's just another spot for me to get my workout in."
I can't help but notice neither of them are using the bathroom for its intended purpose.
Meg: "Okay, what is this nonsense? Who spilt by the fridge?"
Johnny: "Sorry, that was me. I'll clean it up in a few."
Johnny's morning is off to a bad start. Hopefully it will get better.
"OH MY GOD, I'M ON FIRE!"
Wow, today is just not his day.
Shadbak: "I'LL SAVE YOU"
What a hero.
Blort: "I'VE GOT IT"
Aqua: "ME TOO"
And in true Sims fashion, 3 people show up to put out the fire after it's already out. Some things never change.
Aw, he looks so angry. It's adorable.
Meg: "So yeah, I think I have this challenge in the bag."
Blort: "God, Meg is so full of herself. I wish I could show her up."
Blort: "I know! I'll use the telepathic mind-frying trick I learned on her! HNGGGGGH!!!"
That will never work.
Meg: "Ow! My head hurts all of a sudden!"
Oh my god, it worked.
Nevertheless, it's 5:00 and time for the Mid-Week Checkup. *over intercom* Will all houseguests please report to the living room?
Hello everyone, and welcome to your second Mid-Week Checkup. This week you were tasked with mastering the age old game of chess. Some of you actually attempted this challenge. While others just sat on the patio and stared angrily at everyone. However, one of you did achieve a higher logic skill than anyone else. The new owner of the Master Bedroom...
...Is actually it's current owner, because Blort won again!
Blort: "Alright! Another win for the Blort-Steve dream team!"
Meg: "What?! I had this one in the bag!"
I thought so too. But after spending all of this morning practicing, Blort managed to raise his logic skill an impressive 3 points and take the lead!
Meg: "This is ridiculous!"
Blort: (whispering) "Don't listen to her, Steve. She's our next target anyways."
Onto other matters. The three people who scored lowest, and who will be spending 24 hours trapped in the challenge are are...
Shadbak: "Well of course I'm not gonna bother with some crummy chess challenge. I gotta be ready for the physical challenge."
Aqua: "Um, excuse me? Will vegan-friendly food options be presented in the challenge area. The ICV is pretty strict about what their members eat, and their spies are everywhere."
I'm not sure there's any food in the challenge area.
Blort is back in his master suite.
"I know it's only week two, but I think I'm going all the way!"
Only time will tell, Blort.
Meanwhile downstairs this week's bottom 3 settle into their new digs for the next 24 hours.
Rafaella: "It does not feel good being back in here."
Aqua: "Well, there's no cows I can feast on. That's already a bad sign."
Shadbak: "God, last week I was living the good life and now I'm down here with all the other loser. I need to turn my game around. It's time to MAKE SHADBAK GREAT AGAIN!"
Will Rafaella, Aqua, and Shadbak be able to redeem themselves, or will one of them be the next out the door? What will come of the budding rivalry between Blort and Meg? Will anything else come of Harry and Blort's budding relationship? Now that Aqua has come out as vegan, will she every shut up about it? Find out the answer to all these questions on the next episode of "The Doll House"!
Put that bass in your walk.
Head to toe,
Let your whole body talk.
I again apologize about how long this part took to get here. I swear I do love this series, I just love not flunking out of school more. I'll see you all when the next episode comes out, which will likely be next year. Bye!
"What should you do when you've already got everything you ever dreamed? DREAM BIGGER!!!"
-Miss Nancy, Little Inferno
Your gameplay is hilarious by the way!
Edit: Tried adding a screenshot of my household but it isn't working -_-
Sims 4 Big Brother Challenge
I've changed a few things, tho. Like, I have divided the house in two, and thus I have two teams. The best team in the weekly task gets to use the luxurious house, with all the best furniture. The worst team gets to vote on who they'll eliminate. Since I have so few contestants, if the same team looses twice I'll rearrange the teams. Or better, they'll rearrange themselves into different teams :p
Here it goes:
Hello and Welcome to the first episode of Big Brother Sims! Today We'll meet our lovely contestants and see which side of the house they choose. There are two: the fun side and the serious side. Yes, that's right. Both sides are equal in quality and enviroment, the only difference is the decoration, so no group has an unfair advantage! Today's a "free" day, where our contestants will meet each other and choose their sides. Ready?
"I want the most adventurous love life. I'm sure having 1 million simoleons will help me with that; after all, there are kinds of love only money can buy"
Rachel Balderas, 22 years old. High Metabolism, Active, Goofball, Slob.
"Why do I want the money? Well, this money will buy me my personal gym! With the latest equipment! What else could I ever dream of?"
Hunter Cummings, 27 years old. Quick Learner, Geek, Lazy, Self-Assured.
"Are you kidding me? Do you know how expensive it is to have a decent computer? And all kinds of consoles? AND limited edition action figures?"
Brennan Oliver, 29 years old. Collector, Bro, Dance Machine, Loves Outdoor.
"There are plenty of things one can do with such a quantity of simoleons. I'm not sure what I'm going to do, if I win. Maybe save it for some emergency?"
Emery Medley, 21 years old. Gregarious, Outgoing, Neat, Foodie.
"Hm... I'll use the money to pay university. Then, perhaps, I'll open a restaurant."
Aden Orozco, 45 years old. Muser, Insane, Loner, Creative.
"I plan on building myself a castle. Yes, that's right. It'll be a big, peaceful place to write."
Evan Pruett, 24 years old. Dastardly, Hot-Headed, Mean, Active.
"Well, I have a band. 1 million simoleons will definetely help us get famous."
Amara Rowe, 24 years old. Domestic, Gloomy, Neat, Good.
"My mother has a few health problems. The money will help us."
So all of our contestants are sitting in the meeting area, talking to each other. Obviously, they do not know both sides are exactly the same, nor do they know the first person to enter is going to become the leader of the team. Which means they'll choose the name and the outfits they'll wear during the challenges We are now going to talk to them.
"Good Morning, Contestants."
"Good Morning, Voice."
"How are you doing today? Nervous? Have you already decided which door you're going to choose? There are a lot of windows, so you can obviously see there are a few differences to each side."
"Well, I'm keen to the most colorful side! It's very colorful! Looks like fun!"
"Very well, Miss Emery. What about you, Miss Rachel?"
"I'm actually not sure. The colorful side looks a bit... too colorful. Perhaps the other? I'm still thinking..."
And while they're thinking we're going to make a small pause for the commercial. Stay with us 'cause we'll be right back!
Aaaand we're back with the first episode of big brother sims! Today our contestants are going to choose their teams and their sides of the house. Aren't you excited? And it seems that while we were out, one of our contestants has chosen their side! Mr. Evan Pruett is the first to the colorful side! Hello, Mr. Evan!
"It seems you are our boldest contestant! The first to choose! How are you feeling?"
"Energized! I was just exercising myself!"
"Yes, we have noticed. Now I have something to tell you. Don't worry, it's good news. Since you were the first to choose this side, you are the captain of your team! You are alowed to choose the name AND the symbol. Nice, right?"
"Do I have time to think?"
"No. I need a name now."
"Very Well. My team will be called "The Punks", and our symbol will be a skull!"
"That's very... expected. Thank you, Mr. Evan."
"Now, it seems our second contestant has chosen a house! It's Miss Amara, to the colorful side! Or perhaps should I say the Punks side? Right behind her comes Mr. Hunter also to the colorful side!
"It seems Miss Ebony and Miss Rachel chose the serious one! Wow! Hello, Miss Ebony! I'm pleased to announce you're the captain of your team! How about you choose a name and a symbol?"
"Well, My team will be called Love Wins. That's for luck. And our symbol is something to do with love, as well. Perhaps flowers?"
"That will do. Thank you."
"Ah! We're back to the meeting area where our last contestants are waiting to choose their sides! As expected, Miss Emery is being talkative while our dear Loner is all alone, using his cellphone, which this season will not be forbidden by the rules. This might change if we ever find a way to stop them to autonomously use it! Mr. Brennan has also chosen a side! It's the serious one! There he goes."
"Next is Mr. Aden! To the Colorful side! Which means Miss Emery has only gotten the choice of moving to the serious one! Too bad, Miss Emery. You should be less indecisive next time! Now that our teams are formed, how about we take a look at how they're dealing with each other?
"It seems Love Wins have gathered in the bedroom to discuss their strategies and get to know each other, while The Punks are all spread thin. Not a very good strategy, if you ask me."
"At some point, however, someone went to the Kitchen and... well, made a mess of it."
"Regardless, Mr. Evan decided that since someone started preparing all that grilled cheese, he could as well finish it..."
"... even though most of the other contestants are sleeping..."
"... and he is really tired..."
"He is the only one awake at this point. And yet there are no signs he is going to bed."
"So we got tired of waiting and started preparing the contest place. This week we've got... PAINTING!"
"Ah! Finally, Mr. Evan has given up on his quest to cook all of that grilled chesse and has started... eating one."
"He looks happier, now, at least"
"He has decided to wash the dishes... in the bathroom... "
"... and at long last has gone to bed."
"This is where we finish our first ep! Next up we've got out first day of the painting contest and... fighting? Yes! That's right. Hope to see you all around tomorrow to our next episode of Big Brother Sims!"
Originally Posted by JordanFallSims
Sooo my sims pretty much just chat when I lock them in the challenge room. Has anyone else experienced this?
Yeah... that tends to happen with sims. Well, sucks for them!
But seriously, I would try swapping out whatever is in the challenge room for something else, perhaps even a new skill. They could just not be interested in it.
Who knows, Sims are confusing as hell
You guys can see how week 1 went here
Last time on "The Doll House": Following Jeff's eviction, the house was given a new challenge for the week: becoming chess geniuses. Some people immediately took to the challenge, while others once again spent the week screwing around. However, it quickly became clear that this challenge was a race between two people: Blort, whose (alleged) alien genetics gave him an advantage in all mind games, and Meg, who was determined to take the master bedroom away from Blort and for herself. In addition, Blort formed about 20 alliances with a whole slew of houseguests entirely within his own head, and Rafaella started to become ostracized from the rest of the house, largely due to her own paranoia and insanity. At the second mid-week checkup Blort's mental skills proved superior and he managed to keep hold of the master bedroom, while Shadbak, Aqua, and Rafaella were all locked in the challenge area as punishment for their lack of commitment to the game. Tonight: Will the three girls' insanity from being locked up lead us faster to the devolution of humanity than reality television already has? Will Meg be able to defeat Blort and win the master bedroom? And who will be the second houseguest to be evicted? It's all happening right now on "The Doll House"!
Hello, and welcome back to "The Doll House"! Well this part got published a lot faster than the last one did, and by a lot faster I mean it took me a month to write rather than a year. Oh well, foll all 2 of you who were waiting on the edge of your seat for this installment, it's finally here so let's dive right in!
When we last left our dollies Rafaella, Shadbak, and Aqua were all settling in to their new home for the next 24 hours.
Aqua: "You know, I don't think this will be that bad. We can truly be at one with nature out here."
Rafaella: "Yeah! I've learned absolutely nothing from my experience in here last week and am coming into this optimistically!"
Shadbak: "Whatever. I don't care if it's nice, I don't like being caged up anywhere. I'm a free spirit baby."
Rafaella: "Is that why you agreed to be locked in a house with no contact from the outside world for two months?"
Shadbak: "Shut up."
The three were soon joined by everyone else in the house who, unlike them, had an invested interest in not being evicted.
Aqua: "What is everyone doing in here? It's such a nice day, not a cloud or sacrilegious non-vegan product in sight."
Harry: "*quietly shuffles away from the group*"
Meg: "We're working on the challenge. You know, the entire reason you guys were locked in here in the first place."
Meg: "I'm also in here to take down this jerk. I can't believe that you won the master bedroom again. I've been out here day and night all week!"
Blort: "You know, Meg, all the practice in the world means nothing if someone else is just naturally better than you."
Meg: "You shut up, or I'll come over there and choke you until your face turns blu- wait, shit."
I see a rivalry forming!
"I am not happy right now."
That's why they call you Moody Meg.
Rafaella: "Well, this punishment was all nice and good, but it's time for dinner. Girls, I'm making us food, you want anything?"
Aqua: "Whatever you make, put lots of milk in it. The ICV said it's every vegan's duty to drink as much milk as possible."
Rafaella: "I like the way you think!"
Hey Rafaella? Yeah, I don't know if you know this, but you're kind of being punished right now, and being punished means you DON'T GET TO LEAVE THE CHALLENGE AREA *teleports back in*
AND STAY THERE
Rafaella: "*sigh* I'm back with all the rabble again."
Shadbak: "Yeah yeah, now help me out. I got stuck in the fridge again."
Rafaella: "Is this what my life has come to. Helping orcs out of fridges? I thought I had people to do that for me!"
You live by the Doll House, you die by the Doll House, sweetie. Welcome to the family.
Rafaella: "Oh god."
"Ah, it's nice that I got to use the bathroom. Like I said, this punishment is a lot less worse than everyone says it is."
WHAT? When did you escape?!
"While you were busy with Shadbak and Rafaella."
Will you guys please just stay where you're supposed to? *teleports back into challenge area*
After this I had to go and check that I still had the door locking mod installed to keep the girls in.
Meanwhile Shadbak is again critically undervaluing the time she has been given to focus on the challenge.
Rafaella: "Shadbak, do you really think that's the best thing to be doing right now? We have a logic challenge to be working on."
And the pot calls the kettle black. Or more accurately, the wicked witch calls the orc green.
Shadbak: "I admitted to myself a long time ago there's no way I'm winning this challenge. So instead I decided I'm gonna work out so that when the athletic challenge comes around I'll kick everyone else's ass."
Rafaella: "We don't even know if there will be an athletic challenge."
Shadbak: "But if there is, hoo baby! You better watch out."
It was at this point Rafaella finally broke.
"Oh my god, I'm wasting my life away! I'm in a house surrounded by idiots, I'm standing locked in this tiny awful cage that they didn't even have the money to buy actual caging for, and now I'm talking to Shrek's butch half-sister! What did I do to deserve this? I'm a good Catholic, I routinely buy off all the priests in my area, why is God still punishing me? I'm a star on the ouside world! I've had lunch with Tom Ford! I've done cocaine with Ralph Lauren! I'm above this! But now I'm on the lowest rung of humanity like some second-class citizen! Oh god no!"
The Doll House: Bringing out the good side of humanity since 2012.
Rafaella: "Okay, that emotional break down took up a lot of my energy. Time for a nap!"
Aqua: "If I don't look at her I can pretend she's not there."
And we only have 18 more hours of this to go. Buckle in, folks!
Shadbak:" Jokes on you, suckers! I'm making a break for it!"
HOW DO YOU GUYS KEEP ESCAPING?! DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE MEANING OF THE WORD PUNISHMENT?
It was at this point I realized how they were getting out: Due to some but in EA's flawless code, when a Sim sits down on a chair next to a fence, they can phase through the fence like a Star Trek character and stand up on the other side. I would be angry, but I guess that's what I get for attempting to cage them in with a waist-high fence. Actually, if any of these guys had more than half a brain cell, they could probably vault that fence and be free. Thankfully, we specifically screen for intelligence and filter those applicants out during the casting process.
So as a solution I repositioned the chess tables so that nobody on the inside could use them to get outside. I didn't move Rafaella's table yet, though. She's had a rough day, she deserves her rest.
And Shadbak had the first of what I'm assuming will be many bladder failures in the future. I say I lock them in there to encourage them to develop their skills, but really it's just for my entertainment.
DAY 12 (Thursday):
Wow. In a week and a half we've gone from eight people sleeping in the main bedroom to three. I'm thinking a little house remodeling is in store after this eviction.
Meanwhile in the backyard Blort has woken up at the crack of dawn to keep control of his iron grip on the master bedroom. Also Rafaella woke up, so that's nice.
Blort: "So how are you guys doing in here?"
Aqua: "Well there's almost nothing vegan in the fridge, so I've resigned to the fact that I'm most likely going to starve to death in here. Now I'm just trying to figure out where in this pen my corpse would look best."
Shadbak: "I'm dirty, I smell terrible, and I have an overwhelming desire to kill everyone around me. So basically I'm back home."
Rafaella: "Ha! Unlike these two whiners I'm doing great! I'm well rested, I haven't eaten since 1978 so hunger is a non-factor to me, and I've only had one mental breakdown so far! I could do this forever!"
And then she wet herself.
Rafaella: "I take it all back this place is TERRIBLE!"
Never change, Rafaella.
A few hours later and both Shadbak and Rafaella have passed out. Only Aqua has managed to hold out, but she's facing other problems.
Aqua: "Ugh, I can't find any flat surface to prepare my grilled cheese on. This is torture!"
You could probably use one of the chess boards.
Aqua: "What? Don't be silly, that would never work."
Fine, have fun starving.
Meanwhile Shadbak has woken up and resorted to bribery in order to try and escape from the challenge area. Bribery is like the third or fourth stage of grief, so hopefully we'll reach acceptance soon. Though knowing Shadbak, she'll most likely skip acceptance and head on to the little-known sixth stage: homicide.
Shadbak: "Hey Harry, you like yogurt, right? Well, I have this delicious bowl of half-eaten yogurt that I would love to give to you! All you have to is go over there and smash the lock on the gate so that I can get out. And then hold off the security guards they inevitably send in here while I make a break for the house. But hey, after that you can have all this yogurt!"
Harry: "Um, I'm trying to focus on the challenge right now, Shadbak. And I think that yogurt is rotten."
Shadbak: "You will pay for this, hot dog boy."
Upstairs Blort is having way more fun in the bath than should be possible.
"Me and Steve are playing our weekly game of find the soap! It's a way to strengthen our alliance."
And Meg has decided to be nice and clean up the challenge area for all the other girls.
Meg: "Actually I'm about to do a marathon of chess training and I do not want anything to distract me. Blort cannot win again."
I'm glad to see someone is actually putting effort into these challenges.
But it appears Blort is a little preoccupied with sorting out his relationship status with Harry right now.
Harry: "Hey so remember last week when that plant made us madly in love with each other?"
Blort: "Yeah, that was fun!"
Harry: "Well I don't know if this is still the plant talking, but I think we should keep up that relationship."
Blort: "... I'm suddenly very concerned and am going to move to this side of the table."
Harry: "Wait, think about it! The viewers would love a showmance, and I bet we could make it far in this competition together. I mean, you've won the master bedroom twice and I... have a lot of potential."
Blort: "Okay, I'm slightly interested. But there's only room for one man in my life and that's Steve."
Harry: "What about Joe?"
Blort: "We don't talk about Joe any more. That bastard."
Harry: " Well regardless of all that, if we were dating I could show you my other hot dog "
Blort: "Um, ew. No thanks."
Harry: "Not again! Why do I always mess everything up?!"
And then Jeff interrupted this amazing conversation by texting Aqua about her newfound friendship with Rafaella. Jeff, none of these people are supposed to have phones. You can't text them about stuff you're watching on the show from home. *deletes message*
Meanwhile Harry has gone upstairs to hide from the world due to his failed romantic endeavors.
"*sigh* I'll never find true love."
Stop it Harry, you're melting my icy heart.
Oh, and Aqua finally wet herself.
Aqua: "Oh my god this smells terrible! I need to get out of here!"
Shadbak: "That's what I've been saying this entire time, sweetie."
Aqua: "Wait, is that Jeff over the wall? JEFF! HEY JEFF! HELP ME! YOU'VE GOTTA BREAK ME OUT OF HERE!"
Jeff: "Sorry, I actually don't care about any of you at all. I just texted you so my beauitiful face could be on the show again. But good job on becoming friends with Rafaella! She's pretty cool!"
Aqua: "No! Darn you, Jeff!"
And now Meg is aggravated for some reason.
Meg: "I can't focus because all of you smell terrible! I know you don't have access to a shower but you could at least pee on yourselves or something!"
Blort: "Wow Meg, maybe if you were actually intelligent you would sit in the non-smelly area like me. But that may be a bit out of your IQ range."
Meg: "You stay out of this *grabs bowl of cereal to anger eat*"
Rafaella: "Hey guys I just woke up and realized that the chair I was sleeping on is horribly irradiated. Does anyone know how long its been glowing like that for?"
Please stop pointing out my incompetence.
After this Blort went inside and started giving Johnny this odd look.
Blort: "Steve is telling me Johnny is our biggest threat in the house right now. I wonder if it's possible to drown a man in a bowl of cereal..."
Johnny: "Blort, I can hear everything you're saying."
Blort: "I blame this on you, Steve."
There have also been several background characters who we sort of looked at for an episode and then abandoned. I blame it on my terrible memory as I pretty much forgot about them, so now let's all take a moment for a new installment of "Where Are They Now?: Doll House Edition".
The Magic Horny Plant is still chilling in the living room, but due to the fact that nobody's come to visit him he hasn't been able to extend his erotic control over the house. Meg still pities him, however, and stops by occasionally to trim him.
MHP: "Thank you for this beautification, mortal. Your devout service to me shall be remembered on Judgement Day."
Meg: "Why is the bonsai talking to me? Did Blort slip something into my food?"
Gardening Lady is still tending to her crops, and she's damn proud of it. Seriously, all of those plants are at their highest quality right now. I think she's trying to forget about her annoying neighbors and their presence next door.
That concludes this week's episode of "Where Are They Now?: Doll House Edition". Tune in next week to see how the cast of Season 1 is doing. Spoiler alert: They're all dead.
It appears that Harry and Blort are at least on good enough terms to play chess with each other, so at least Harry's advances aren't too off-putting.
Harry: "Hey, so about us..."
Blort: "Let's just focus on the challenge for now, okay?"
Harry: "*sigh* Okay"
Also, Jeff is now attempting to strike a deal with Gardening Lady.
Jeff: "Alright, so here's the plan: We both go to your stupid little garden around the back of the house, you help me vault over the fence, I get naked in front of the cameras, and then the producers will be so overcome by my beauty that they'll have no choice but to let me back on the show."
Gardening Lady: "Do I need to get a restraining order against you? I've already filed a complaint with your producers and they've said I have the right to use lethal force if any of you attempt to approach me outside of the house."
I have a feeling Jeff is going to be a burden for the entire season.
Meanwhile inside the house Shadbak is attemtpting to strike a similar deal with Meg.
Shadbak: "Hey Meg! Harry rudely denied to help me earlier so maybe you'll be a better friend! All I need you to do is vault this fence."
Meg: "That fence is like 3 feet high. Honestly you could probably step over it if you tried."
Shadbak: "...Huh. I never realized that."
Stop giving her ideas Meg.
Meg: "Stop annoying me, I need to focus on chess. I refuse to let that smug little blue $#@& beat me again!"
The look on Harry's face makes me think he realizes how far off the deep end Meg has gone.
Aqua: "What just happened?"
Your 24 hours of punishment are up and you're all now free. Now only you can give yourselves the motivation needed to complete this challenge and raise yourselves out from the bottom, but seeing as you all wasted this 24 hours I doubt that's gonna happen.
Rafaella: "Oh thank god. I never thought I'd see civilized society again."
Johnny: "Rafaella, you've been through this before."
Rafaella: "Shut up! You wouldn't understand, the second time is always hardest."
And now we get to see our 3 savages taking the houseguest "walk of shame" back to the main house to clean themselves up.
Aqua immediately passes out on the bed. Actually, I think she was the only one not to pass out in the challenge area.
And Rafaella immediately goes to wash up.
"Now that I'm clean I once again feel like an actual human being. Also that shower was broken when I got in here."
Uh huh, sure.
Meanwhile Shadbak, who clearly could not be asked to make the long trek upstairs to the bedroom, instead passes out in the living room. Also, seeing as they're going to sleep while it's still daylight outside, I can't wait to see how screwed up their sleep schedules will become.
And now that nobody's being forced to stay in the challenge area, you'll notice it's cleared out faster than a Walmart at closing time. Except for Meg and Johnny, who are putting in some late night chess work.
Johnny: "I'm used to pulling all-nighters in college. This is no different."
Meg: "And I'm getting in extra practice while Blort is asleep. I will destroy him."
So that was Thursday. I doubt think will cool down any tomorrow.
DAY 13 (Friday):
Yep. We're starting the lunacy off nice and early.
"I will destroy this lettuce. It has dishonored me one time too many!"
It's 6 AM, Blort.
"Justice never sleeps!"
Also, I just noticed Blort sprouts hair whenever he's wearing anything other than his normal wear. I'm sure there's a rational explanation for why that is, but I don't have it.
Harry: "Hey Blort, could you be a little less messy when you're destroying the lettuce? Look at how dirty you made this counter!"
Blort: "Sorry Harry, but a dirty is a small price to pay for the death of this evil vegetable."
Blort: "But here. I'll give you some of my breakfast BLT as compensation."
Harry: "Aww, thanks buddy."
I know nothing's ever going to happen between them, but I still ship it <3
And then Debbie Downer Aqua came in.
Harry: "Hey Aqua. Why are you so sad?"
Aqua: "I just realized that I wet myself and nearly starved on national TV."
Well, I wouldn't say "national". More like "a handful of people on the internet".
Aqua: "My parents watch this show! What are they going to think when they see that?"
Blort: "Well they'll probably think you're a failure and disown you."
Aqua: "...Thanks Blort"
"No time for thanks. I woke up early so that I could specifically put in more work on the challenge. Meg thinks she's so smart. I will break her!"
I know it's boring having one person dominate the challenges, but Blort genuinely puts in the work. It's impressive.
Even Rafaella's finally getting in to the spirit of the week.
"Now the first and most important rule of chess is that it's a gentleman's game, and as such you must always move the pieces with your pinky up. God, I'm a chess master."
...Well, we all have to start somewhere.
And here's a nice photo of everyone outside together working on the challenge and having a good time. It could also be the promo shot for their new zany spin-off sitcom about all seven of them sharing an apartment in New York City. Enjoy it while you can, guys, because one of you is getting the boot in two days.
Rafaella: "What?! The eviction's in two days?! I've gotta get going! Shadbak come over here and spot me!"
Shadbak: "YEAH! Finally someone listened to me. You all better prepare because Raf and I are going to kill the athletic challenge!"
I do have an athletic challenge lined up, but I'm thinking of changing it to something else just to screw with them.
"It's time to pull a chess all-nighter! First things first: Get some protein! This grilled cheese contains cheese, which is like solid milk. Perfect for spiritual replenishment!"
"Alright! Now I'm all set for my chess all-nighter. Master bedroom, here I come!"
She went to bed about 30 minutes after this photo was taken. Ten bucks to anyone who can guess one of the bottom 2 on Sunday.
Well that day went by fast. I guess for once nothing photo-worthy was happening in the house.
DAY 14 (Saturday):
Morning, guys- why are you two doing the potty walk?
Shadbak: "None of the toilets in this stupid house work."
What? But you guys just fixed the toilets yest-
-Oh. Why does nothing in this house work? And if you guys need to go to the bathroom why didn't you fix the toilets?
Rafaella: "What? I would never touch a toilet! I leave that to the help."
Sweetie, you're in the Doll House. You ARE the help.
So I got Rafaella (who now has the highest Handiness skill in the house because I always make her fix things) to fix the toilet. Everyone has to pay their dues if they want to be a member of the house.
Although rather than using the toilet after this she then decided to go back downstairs and wet herself on the way down. How tragic.
"Oh my god, this is so embarrassing. Thank God nobody saw."
Smile for the camera, Rafaella.
Also: Who wore it better?
Shadbak fixed the downstairs toilet and then wet herself immediately after. I'm not sure what part of that puddle is urine and what part is toilet water but this entire scene is starting to gross me out. Let's look at something else.
Today's episode of "The Doll House" is brought to you by Hidden Valley LSD. Hidden Valley LSD: "If you aren't seeing bunnies see-sawing on a rainbow, you clearly haven't done enough yet." Now back to your regularly scheduled programming <3
After her unfortunate incident upstairs, Rafaella has gotten a drink to calm her nerves. Wait, what's this? Is she drinking ORANGE JUICE?!
"You have broken me."
Thus begins the fall of Rafaella Merchachi.
Shadbak: "Hey remember that time like two days ago when we were all trapped and tortured?"
Rafaella: "Haha, yeah! Good times."
While the three girls are enjoying their post-traumatic bonding session, Harry passes by and gives them a shifty look.
Harry: "You three think you can laugh and bond together? We'll see how safe you all feel tomorrow..."
And now Harry has let paranoia and anger control him. It's Week 2 and people are already starting to go off the deep end. By Week 4 this house is going to be a feral wasteland.
"Ew, why does this puddle smell so bad?"
Harry: "The nerve of those three. They were in the dining room in plain view of everyone, laughing. And do you know what they were laughing about? IN JOKES! They have in jokes, for God's sake. If I didn't know any better I'd say they're in an alliance."
Blort: "If they are in an alliance, it's not a very good one as combined they all have a competence level of approximately zero. Besides, it's probably just a survivor bond thing they have from being stuck in the challenge area together."
Harry: "Don't you see? A survivor bond is the perfect catalyst for an alliance! They're gonna start picking us off one by one! I think us three should for an alliance just to protect ourselves and keep them in check."
Meg: "Thanks Harry, but the only alliance I'm a part of is the 'Take Down Blort' alliance, and that's less of an alliance and more of a personal mantra that I'll most likely get tattooed on my back after the season's over."
Blort: "Someone's bitter..."
Meg: "Shut up!"
And then Blort started grilling Johnny.
Blort: "Traitor! I know you told Steve about my side-thing with Joe! That just shows the kind of person you are. I hope you're packed, because I'm sending you home!"
Johnny: "What?! I have not idea what you're talking about."
Blort: "LIAR! My lie-detecting chess board is glowing white, you bastard!"
Johnny: "I just wanted to play a nice game of chess! *runs off*"
"I actually made all that stuff up. I just wanted to scare him off so I could practice by myself."
Never stop being you, Blort.
Also Shadbak has started flirting with the MHP. This season is quickly becoming the "Doll House" equivalent of the Titanic. Actually, I think that's every season.
Shadbak: "You know, us two have a lot in common. You're green, I'm green, we're like twins. If you ever want to have some fun with a real woman, you know where to find me."
MHP: "GREETINGS MORTAL! SHALL YOU JOIN ME IN MY INEVITABLE CONQUEST OF THIS PLANET AND GENOCIDE OF THE HUMAN RACE? YOU'RE NOT A HUMAN SO THERE WOULDN'T BE ANYTHING MORALLY WRONG WITH THAT."
Shadbak: "Genocide? Sorry, I'm not really in to the BDSM stuff."
MHP: "YOU SHALL PAY FOR YOUR TREASON IN TIME."
Meanwhile upstairs Rafaella is still embarrassed about her bladder failure and is now trying to hide from everyone.
Aqua: "Raf, are you okay?"
Rafaella: "No! My life is over, my pants are ruined, I've given up!"
"Okay, I'm fine! Now which one's the pawn again?"
The best thing about the Sims 4 mood system is the potential it creates for violent mood swings.
Harry: "Hey Aqua, let's take a selfie!"
Aqua: "Yeah, totally!"
Harry: "*to self* I'm actually going to use this photo to keep track of the new alliance in the house."
Why have we not confiscated their phones yet?
Jeff, buddy. I thought we talked about this: You're not a part of this season any more. So stop acting like you are.
Jeff: "But I just needed to let Meg know that Blort is pretty cool. This is vital information, you know."
I can imagine.
Harry: "Well that doesn't look good."
OKAY, WHAT ARE THE HOUSE'S PIPES MADE OF?! CARDBOARD?!
Thankfully Handyman Harry fixed it for us. And Meg was kind enough to clean the ever-dirty counter.
Meg: "Actually, I was just cleaning so I could get into the 'Focused' mood and level up in chess faster."
Ooh, metagaming. I like it.
Harry: "So, how good friends are you two? Close friends? Best friends? 'Actually in a secret alliance together' friends? Hm?"
Rafaella: "I have no idea who she is."
Aqua: "Raf, we've lived together for two weeks."
Rafaella: "And what does that say about you that in those two weeks you've been so unremarkable I have no opinions on you?"
Ouch. That was cold.
Clearly devastated by that burn from Rafaella, Aqua didn't even bother to change before going to sleep.
Also, there are now five people in the bedroom. Better, but I still think some remodeling is in store.
DAY 15 (Sunday):
It's eviction day! Let's see how everyone is spending their last few hours before the eviction.
Rafaella and Aqua clearly both got a pep talk from Shadbak, which explains why the're still up at 3 AM. The worst part is they aren't even taking this time to work on the challenge.
Rafaella: "Actually, I think Shadbak has the right idea. I'm just gonna cut my losses this week and prepare for the athletic challenge."
Aqua: "How long has this plant been here?"
MHP: "GREETINGS MORTAL!"
Get away from the plant, Aqua.
HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO SAY IT
Jeff: "Ey bb u got a kik? "
I give up.
Rafaella: "What a lovely day! I get to eat a hearty meal and enjoy my surroundings."
There's a rotting glass of orange juice next to you.
Rafaella: "I know! Isn't it wonderful!"
Also the fridge broke again, but like I said I've given up. If none of them want to fix the fridge they can enjoy their rotting groceries.
Although clearly rotting food isn't a problem to them as is.
Meg: "Does anyone smell that?"
Shadbak: "It's probably nothing."
Meg: "Okay, cool."
Shadbak: "Hey Johnny, know how the eviction is today and I was in the bottom three on Wednesday? What do you say we swap clothes for the day and if I'm evicted you take the fall for me. I'll owe you one!"
Johnny: "Uh uh. I refuse to do any negotiation. Talk to the hand, sweetheart."
Aqua has finally come down off of Shadbak's pep talk and has crashed on the sofa. At noon. 5 hours before the eviction. These people do realize their game is in jeopardy right now, right?
Meg: "I don't mean to brag, but I think I've got this challenge down on lock. I've been practicing day & night all week."
Blort: "Keep deluding yourself, sweetie."
Meg: "He's just in denial."
Rafaella: "Hey Blort, let's take a pre-eviction selfie!"
Blort: "Great idea!"
I'm going to need to download a mod to deal with this, aren't I?
The majority of the house is getting in some last-minute logic skill-building, but unfortunately for them...
It's too late! Eviction time! *over intercom* Will all houseguests please come to the living room.
Hello everyone, and welcome to your second eviction of the season. This week you were tasked with leveling up your logic skill, and while some of you seriously dedicated yourselves to the challenge, others decided this would be the perfect opportunity to take a week-long vacation from the game. That being said, it was a close one but the new owner of the master bedroom...
...Is it's current owner. Congratulations Blort, you have won the master bedroom for the third time in a row.
Meg: "WHAT?! That's impossible! I put so much time into this challenge, how on earth did he win?!"
Like I said: it was a close one. Both of you were at logic level 6, but Blort's green bar was more full, meaning he had the higher skill. Sorry, Meg.
Blort: "Oh well Meg, not so cocky now, huh? Maybe I'll let you look into my room for a few minutes. Probably not, though!"
Meg: "Grrr. This isn't over."
Now let's move on to the worst of the week. Two of you just barely made it to logic level 3. This week's bottom 2 are...
Rafaella and Aqua.
Rafaella: "Bottom 2 again? But how?!"
Johnny: "Gee, I don't know. It's not like you spent the entire week doing nothing."
And the second person evicted from the Doll House is...
... it's a tie.
I kid you not, I've checked and double-checked, and they are at the exact same level of logic skill, green bars included. They've done the impossible. Amazing.
Shadbak: "So what happens now?"
I'm not gonna lie: I have no idea. I wasn't expecting this million-to-one scenario to happen, but I guess that's just the kind of fool I am. Hmm. Okay, here's what we'll do: we'll vote.
Thank you for giving me a chance for some exposition, Harry. Since their skills are completely tied and there's five of you, we'll put it to a vote Season 1-style. One by one each of you will vote for who you would like to see leave the house and then I'll check your relationship bars and see who you like less, okay? Okay.
Okay, the votes have all been counted. By a vote of 4-1...
Aqua, you have been evicted from the Doll House.
Aqua: "Aw, okay. Bye everyone! Have fun and make sure to do your duty to the ICV by drinking lots of milk!"
Johnny: "Bye Aqua."
Shadbak: "Nobody likes you."
Two kinds of people, folks. Now please leave Aqua.
Hi Aqua. Are you surprised by your eviction?
"Kind of, yeah. I mean, I know I wasn't the best at chess, but how did Rafaella beat me? She can't even tie her own shoes!"
What about the result of the vote? Four people voted to evict you.
"Now that I was expecting. I think everyone just felt pity for Rafaella and her poor mental state and voted to keep her in so she'll be evicted next week and they'll all have a free week."
Wow, you people are cold.
"Hey, it's the name of the game."
Speaking of the game, how does it feel knowing that if you had put half a breath worth of effort more in at ANY point this week, you wouldn't be standing here right now?
"Yeah, I think I'm gonna regret that."
I think so too. Goodbye Aqua, and thank you for making writing this easier for me by providing potential for easy vegan jokes. Although we're moving you into the same safe house we're keeping Jeff in, so I assume you'll start making daily visits to the house trying to break back in. But until then, see you never.
And so Aqua was the second person to leave the house in a situation I genuinely did not anticipate. With her goes what may have been the last bit of sanity in the house. Will the remaining six descend in to chaos? What challenge will the group face next week? Will it finally be the athletic challenge Shadbak wants so badly? And next time we'll go full Ty Pennington as we revamp our dollies' living space. All of this and much more will happen next time on "The Doll House"!
AN:Once upon a time I was falling in love,
But now I'm only falling apart.
Nothing I can say,
A total eclipse of the heart.
Yay for more frequent Doll House updates! It was a busy year for me, but now I'm starting to get invested in these guys again so expect more soon! Or I could just abandon you all for a year again, that's cool too. But until next time, bye!
"What should you do when you've already got everything you ever dreamed? DREAM BIGGER!!!"
-Miss Nancy, Little Inferno
Originally Posted by lolmeeshker57
I've been really psyched to do this challenge for a while, but I can't for the life of me work up the motivation to build a house. Any premade houses/ideas you guys recommend to make it easier?
Check out The Sims Resource . They have endless options.
PREVIOUSLY ON "The Doll House": With Shadbak, Rafaella, and Aqua locked in the challenge area, tensions ran high as literally everyone in the house went insane. Rafaella dealt with the drama of being in the bottom for her second time for about 2 seconds, then went back to doing nothing to save herself. Tensions between Meg and Blort continued to grow as both fought to win the master bedroom, but at the eviction ceremony Blort once again proved victorious in his skills, leaving Meg in the dust. Meanwhile Rafaella ended up in the bottom two for her second week in a row, but after a surprise tie led to the dollies voting on who would be evicted, Aqua became the second person to leave the house. Now: with only 6 people left and a new challenge, tensions are running high in the house. Will a new age of friendship don for the houseguests, or will everything go up in flames? Find out right now on "The Doll House"!
Welcome back to "The Doll House"! It's the holiday season, and with that comes a little free time in my schedule, which I'm choosing to use writing updates to my glorified fanfiction online rather than actually spending time with family. Merry Christmas!
We join the remaining houseguests just moments after Aqua's eviction (Well, technically it's been 5 months since Aqua's eviction, but you get what I mean).
Johnny: "You know, Aqua was a little annoying at times, but her heart was in the right place. It's gonna be sad to see her leav-"
Rafaella: "Oh thank GOD, she's finally gone! Always yapping on about how she was miss 'high-and-mighty-vegan-lady'. I say we all do shots in the backyard to celebrate."
Johnny: "...Nevermind, then."
The number of people left in the house is getting smaller, so to commemorate that fact I've taken the time to do a little house redecorating. Let's take a look at the (very minimal) changes that have been made to their living spaces:
First up, the large dining room table has been reduced from eight seats to six. And already it's been trashed by people leaving out plates and trays. Awesome job guys, you couldn't let me have this ONE thing.
Next, three beds have been taken out of the bedroom to make things a little spacier for the five people not sleeping in the master bedroom.
Blort: "Not sleeping in the master bedroom? I don't know what that feels like. It's been so long since I've done that."
Meg: "Shut up, Blort!"
Blort: "Nobody likes a Bitter Betty, Meg."
Haha, just some casual banter between two friends.
Meg: "I will murder you in your sleep, you overweight Smurf."
Blort: "I don't know how you plan on killing me in my sleep when you don't have access to my bedroom!"
Meg: "OH, YOU *censored*"
Haha, gotta love that friendly banter...
And lastly, the backyard has been updated for the next weekly challenge: It's social week! This week in the Doll House is all about bonding and strengthening the relationships between houseguests. At the end of the week, the person with the best relationships in the house will win the master bedroom, while the person who everyone hates gets the boot. And to help everyone out in making friends, we've given the houseguest the three pillars friendships are built on: booze, music, and hot tubs!
After hearing about this week's challenge, Rafaella's mood seems to have immediately perked up.
"So the challenge is a popularity contest? Oh thank God! I'm the most popular person in the house! I've got this one in the bag! And to show how sure I am of my success in this challenge, I'm going to keep up my tradition of never going into the backyard."
Sounds like a solid plan.
"You can be snarky all you want, but I've got statistics on my side in this case! Tonight's vote was a 4-1 decision. That means 4 of the other 5 people in the house like me! I'm guaranteed to win!"
No, 4 of the 5 people left in the house like you more than the girl who is now gone and no longer here.
"Whatever, I know a pattern when I see one!"
Well, it looks like we're in for another week of Rafaella sliding by in the competition by doing the bare minimum required of her.
"Ooh, I love this song! I may stay out here for a while!"
...Or maybe not
Meg: "Wait, we have music now? Sweet! Let me show you my very awkward dance moves!"
Johnny: "Oh my god, a radio! Awesome!"
The one upside to cutting off six Sims from anything remotely entertaining is that once something fun does pop up, they'll all immediately flock to it, giving them more opportunities to interact with one another. Now that's good challenge design
Also, I just noticed Meg isn't wearing shoes with her formal outfit. Oh well, these things happen.
Johnny: "I love music."
Rafaella: "So, big boy, you come to this bar often?"
Well someone's getting into the challenge.
Johnny: "Um, what?"
Rafaella: "Oh stop playing dumb, I know you've been eyeing me from across the room all night. I know you want me. And maybe, if you're lucky, you'll get a sneak peach at the Merchachi family jewels..."
Aaaaand this just got incredibly dirty. I'm sure the editors will censor that out in post.
Rafaella: "Thank you for joining me, baby. Can I get you a drink? I realize there's not currently a bartender as there's literally only four other people in this house, but I'm sure we can flag down someone."
Johnny: "I'm sorry, Raf, but I'm not really that interested."
Dude, she owns her own fashion line. She's loaded, wants you, and is one botched surgery away from dying early.
It's true. Marry her right now, let her do anything she wants to you, and you can retire at 25.
Johnny: "Well when you put it that way..."
Rafaella: "If you need me, I'll be upstairs."
When all else fails, just sleep with the competition.
Aqua: "Thanks for taking me on this field trip, Jeff. Isn't this the house?"
Jeff: "Yep! This is the front door of the house. The thing they don't tell you about the show is that after you're evicted you're free to come back and visit whenever you please! We're super popular, so they want us back."
LEAVE THIS PLACE.
LEAVE IT NOW.
Blort: "Thank you for making me breakfast at 7 in the evening, Raf, but why did you do that again?"
Rafaella: "All I'm saying is, if that master bed ever gets lonely, I'm just down the hall."
Someone's playing the dirty game...
Rafaella: "I know you have your pick of any orc guy you want, but if you ever want a real human woman, I'm here for you."
Shadbak: "Thanks for the offer... I think?"
Have you no shame, Rafaella?
Rafaella: "Hey, I'm just playing the game like you wanted me to."
Gardening Lady: "My, these plants are growing big and strong now, aren't they!"
It was at this point I was growing bored of the usual routine in the house and decided to resort to a bit of mischief to spice things up.
So I sent Blort on a strike mission.
Blort: "Hi Gardening Lady!"
Gardening Lady: "Gardening Lady? My name is Cayde- wait, aren't you that freak from next door? I thought you weren't allowed to leave that house."
Blort: "What? Ma'am. I have hair and am in a tuxedo. Blort is bald and walks around naked. We're two completely different people!"
Gardening Lady: "I never said which one I was referring to-"
Blort: "WELP GOTTA RUN!"
I had him steal all of the flowers and plants out of her garden.
"Hehe, I love screwing with people."
Actually, now I'm curious. How do you grow hair for your formal outfit?
"Family secret. Passed down from generation to generation."
... I'm going to pretend I understand and not inquire further.
And voila! A barren garden! Also in the background you'll notice the hole I blasted in the backyard wall to let Blort out.
Meg: "Wait, there's a hole in the fence? GUYS, WE'RE FREE! WE CAN FINALLY LEAVE!"
"Can't wait to enjoy this delicious toast!"
Is the sink broken again?
"Don't know, don't care. Not my problem!"
Just smile through the pain, Gizmo. It'll all be over soon.
DAY 16 (Monday):
It's currently 2AM and everyone's had a few drinks.
Meg: "Raf, you're *hic* my favorite person in the entire house."
Rafaella: "I love you, girl. You know, if you ever want to know what success tastes like, I'll just be upstairs."
Meg: "Raf, I've heard you offer yourself to every person in this house. I'm not gonna fall for that."
Rafaella: "*hic* I LOVE YOU MAN!"
*"Party Rock Anthem" comes on*
"Ohhhhh my God, I love this song. I could listen to this song aaallllll night."
And he did.
I'm not even joking.
Johnny: "Shuffle! Do-do-do-do-do-do-do. What a great song!"
Blort: "Johnny, I didn't see you go to bed last night. Where were you."
Johnny: "This great song came on at 2 in the morning, and I loved it so much I decided I would play it on loop for six hours."
Blort: "...How much did you have to drink last night?"
Johnny: "Not much. Just a shot or twenty."
Also, take good note of Harry dancing in the background, because I think this is one of maybe two photos I took of him this chapter. Who would think a man in a hot dog suit would be the forgettable one?
And then Blort started skinny dipping.
Blort: "It's actually a psychological trick. If I scare everyone else away they can't be near the radio, and thus can't be making friends!"
Yes, because the only place where you can make friends is by the radio.
Harry: "Blort, I'm very uncomfortable right now..."
Blort: "Ladies and gentlemen, my genius at work."
Johnny: "I'm so tired."
Then maybe you shouldn't have stayed up all night.
Also, the fridge is broken again. Sigh
"I'm doing dishes right now. I'm busy. Don't make me fix it.
To avoid these "broken appliances" pictures from becoming redundant, just assume everything in the house is in a constant state of disrepair.
Another thing that's becoming redundant is Rafaella attempting to sell her body to everyone in the house.
Rafaella: "Shadbak, you're my only true friend in this house. I hope you know that. If you ever want a real woman-"
Shadbak: "Just shut up and let a hug be a hug."
The Doll House: Making true friendships since 2012.
I think I originally took this picture to show that people actually were using the hot tub, but I now realize it also serves the secondary purpose of proof that Harry is still alive and in the house.
Blort: "Harry! Hey! Come and dance with me!"
Harry: "I would, but I'm busy building a potato cannon in the basement. That's why I'm not getting any airtime this episode."
Blort: "Wait, we have a basement?"
Harry: "Wha- no! Nope! Who said anything about a basement? No basements in this Doll House, no sir! Hahaha..."
Blort: "...I'm watching you, Hotdog..."
Now this right here is the magic of the Doll House. In real life a glamour diva and a goth girl would never eat dinner together, but in the house anything is possible.
Meg: "Yeah, about that: I'd like to sit down and eat dinner, but Rafaella's making very uncomfortable phallic movements with her fork."
Rafaella: "Just a friendly reminder of what the Rafaella experience is all about. Just vote for me to win the challenge!"
Well, she's committed. I'll give her that.
Although I will say that Rafaella has surprisingly become the handywoman of the house. I think she's at level 4 or 5 of handiness now. Whenever something breaks, which is very very often, she's there to fix it.
Rafaella: "Hey everyone. Just a friendly reminder that I'm the one fixing the fridge. The fridge you all eat food out of. Just keep that in mind when you're voting for who to win this challenge."
Always the saleswoman, Raf.
And now she's sad.
"Why is nobody paying attention to me? I do so many nice things for these people, but they always ignore me. I just want to be loved!"
Aw. I would feel sympathy for her, but after three weeks dealing with these people I'm having trouble feeling much of anything.
Just go outside and hang out with everyone else, that will make you happier.
Meg: "Think you can do some jazzy moves like these, Raf? *breaks it down*"
Rafaella: "Oooh, of course I can. I'm hip. I'm young. I'm with the youths."
Also, still having not slept since his all-night Part Rock session, Johnny is finally heading to pass out on the living room couch.
Johnny: "Don't stay up all night, kids. It's a bad idea."
You don't say.
Meanwhile, Gardening Lady has returned to her garden for the first time today to discover Blort's sabotage last night. And she's taking it... rather well?
"Oh noooo, all the plants are gone. Now I'll have to replant everything, which means I'll have to do something other than listen to those idiots over the wall all day. What a shame..."
Every cloud, folks.
And in the 5 minutes since we last checked on Rafaella, she's solved her problems of self-doubt by finishing off the house's supply of tequila. Now she's invincible.
Rafaella: "LOVE ME, BLORT! *shoves chest in Blort's face*"
Blort: "I am... strangely okay with this."
Shadbak: "As am I."
Rafaella: "I AM A GODDESS. I'M GONNA FIX THIS TOILET NOW BECAUSE I CAN!"
A drunk Rafaella is a fun Rafaella.
Rafaella: "The toilet is pristine, IT'S TIME TO DANCE!"
We here at "The Doll House" would just like to remind viewers to please drink responsibly. Also, Harry spotting in the background.
Harry: "Everyone here should stay out of the basement that we don't have."
Also, in between play sessions I finally updated to the version of the game with the new fancy dynamic lighting. So be prepared to enjoy "The Doll House" like you never have before.
"Sweet, I just hit Level 5 of cooking."
Yes, making 5 million salads does pay off in the end. Johnny is now the best cook in the house, and clearly feeling like more of a man because of it.
And Blort is dancing by himself.
"No, I'm preparing for the challenge. We were given a radio, so I'm gonna practice all night to make sure I'm the best dancer in the house! I can't have Meg steal the win from me. Not now that I'm on a streak."
Blort, you know the challenge is a social challenge, right?
There's nobody else out here.
"But how well can they dance is the question!"
...At least you're not trying to sleep with the entire house like Rafaella.
*2 HOURS LATER*
Speaking of which...
Rafaella: "SHADBAK YOU ARE MY BEST FRIEND IN THIS ENTIRE HOUSE! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!"
Shadbak: "You too!"
If you look for it, I’ve got a sneaky feeling you’ll find that love actually is all around.
Sorry, I love that damn movie.
Also, since Johnny is currently the master chef of the house, I decided to put him on bartending duty. Let's see how good of a mixologist he is by the end of the season.
I mean, he's already got some fancy tricks and skills.
On a completely unrelated note, Johnny is ripped.
I mean look at those things.
"Ladies, please. You can get pictures after the show."
On a completely unrelated note, I love how cozy the house's bedroom is. Like I would love to sleep there.
DAY 17 (Tuesday):
"Level 2 of mixology, achieved!"
Johnny, it's 2AM. Remember what happened last time you stayed up this late.
And the search for photos of Harry has become a full-on Bigfoot hunt. Here we see a possible photo of Harry in the bedroom, eating a grilled cheese.
Also: Harry, why are you eating grilled cheese in the bedroom at 2 in the morning?
Harry: "Ease off, okay? Building a potato cannon is a lot of hard work!"
Speaking of which, the house blueprints say nothing about a basement. Where are you sneaking off to?
Harry: "Good question. Maybe I'll answer it, maybe I won't."
"Ah, no better way to start off the morning than with a nice bowl of spaghetti!"
Blort, the stove's on fire.
"Not my problem. Rafaella handles that stuff."
Yeah, and Rafaella's currently hungover into next week. Fix it.
Hey kids, it's the friendly neighborhood mailbox! Hi friendly neighborhood mailbox! What do you have for us today?
FNM: "Hi everyone! I'm here to tell you that you haven't paid your bills! You better pay them soon or I'LL LOSE IT YOU FREELOADING BUMS!!!"
The friendly neighborhood mailbox isn't feeling very friendly right now.
Shadbak: "I knew the risks of day drinking, but I still chose to do it. And now I'm paying the price."
Rafaella, you're the richest person in the house. Can you foot the bill this time?
Rafaella: "*sigh* Honestly, I don't know where I am right now. I think I may be suffering from alcohol poisoning. Sure I'll pay the bill. Here's some money, funny talking mailbox."
FNM: "Thank you! Remember to be diligent in your bill-paying, or I will find you! Hee hee, byeeee! ^-^"
One of the fun parts of writing this series is that I have absolutely no standards or dignity to uphold.
And Johnny, clearly cranky about being kept up two nights in a row, has escaped.
"Stupid Doll House, can't even get a decent show in there. I'm going to live with the Goths! Maybe there filming 'Keeping Up With the Goths' or some other actually interesting reality show."
Nobody likes a quitter, Johnny. Which is why I included a "No Tapping Out" clause in the contracts you signed in order to be on the show. Just in case you might have been tempted.
Blort: "I'm loving this music."
Meg: "Wait, is the speaker playing Christmas music? Why is it doing that?"
Because, my good dollies, it's CHRISTMAS TIME in the Doll House! A time of merriment and cheer! And to celebrate, I've done a little more house redecorating!
I put up a Christmas tree with some fake presents in the living room! Also pictured is the Magic Horny Plant, which literally nobody cares about any more.
MHP: "Fools! Soon I will rise and inherit the Eart-"
Yeah, could you stop talking? You're ruining the spirit of the holidays.
Some wreaths have been added by the front door to remind houseguests of the meaning of the season while they're being evicted. Although let's be honest here, it's gonna be Veteran's Day before the next eviction happens.
And that chicken statue we've had since Week 1 has been joined by a snow globe. Also picture is the nude blur from Johnny's shower that he finally took.
And here we have all of the houseguests hanging out and dancing together! How nice! Actually, they're all gaining friendship with one another very fast. There's a good change everyone will have maxed out relationship bars with each other by the end of the week. Lord knows what we'll do if that happens.
Shadbak: "Hey Johnny, selfie time!"
I will destroy every phone in that godforsaken house if I see another selfie being taken.
And to end this rather short day, we have Johnny in the field in a rare interaction with the elusive Harry.
Johnny: "Harry, where have you been?! Everyone is looking for you. Have you been camped out in here all week?"
Harry: "Sure, let's go with that story."
DAY 18 (Wednesday):
Today is the day for the mid-week skill check. Or will we have a twist? Who knows? Frankly, who cares? Let's just see how everyone is preparing and panicking.
Blort is putting in overtime on his dancing.
"I might not have the best relationships in the house, but I will have the best dance moves in the house!"
Well the challenge was kind of relationships, so good luck with that.
I just felt like showing you this.
I give up.
At least Rafaella is helping out.
"Yeah, I'm finally recovering from that Monday night boozefest. I just need to do some cleaning to keep my mind off of any repressed regret I may have."
Blort is enjoying what is potentially his last bubble bath of his week-and-a-half-long stay in the master bedroom.
"Yeah, no. I'm gonna win this challenge as well. There's no doubt in my mind. I'm just getting clean so I look good when the cameras zoom in on my face while you say 'Congratulations Blort, you win again! You're the best! Meg, you're evicted because nobody likes you!' Or something along those lines."
Try nothing along those lines.
And now that Rafaella has recovered, she's back to her old ways.
Rafaella: "Hey Harry. I heard you've been in a basement all week. Well, I'd really like to show you my basement if you're up for it."
Rafaella! This is a PG-13 forum!
Aw, here's a cute little shot of everyone eating together as a house. This almost never happens! I'm sure they're all saying horrible things to one another, but they're together and that's what's important.
Harry: "And another thing about Trump..."
Okay, we're going to skip the politics. We have enough idiots in the house, we don't need to get the idiots in Washington involved as well.
(This has been, "Gizmo attempts to do political humor and fails." Thank you all for watching *roll credits*)
Shadbak and Meg talk a bit before the skill check.
Meg: "So what do you think you're odds of being in the bottom are?"
Shadbak: "I'm not worried at all. It's gonna be Blort and Harry. I'm calling it right now."
Meg: "Oh, without a doubt. I've been waiting to vote against Blort since the challenge was announced. My only question is, will Raf's insanity this week pay off?"
Shadbak: "I feel kinda sad for her. I may give her a vote out of pity. Also, it would be funny as hell to see Blort realize he lost to Rafaella."
Meg: "Oooooh, true!"
Everyone getting in some last minute socializing before the check, but it's too late!
Rafaella: "Whoah, where did everything go?"
*over intercom* All houseguests please report to the living room.
Hello everyone. This week you were asked to build up and improve your relationships and friendships with one another. Normally this is the point where I would look at everyone's relationships to determine who wins and who gets punished. But it's Week 3, that's getting stale and predictable, and I'm slightly convinced you all have already maxed out your friendships with one another. So instead of the mid-week skill check, this week we're switching it up!
Shadbak: "Wait, what?!"
Meg: "You mean I don't get to vote to evict Blort?"
Everyone please stand up.
Rafaella: "Wait, what are we all wearing? And why do I look so good in my clothes?"
I'm sure you're all wondering why I've dressed you up like club kids, but all will soon be explained. Head to the backyard, because it's time for an-
*To Be Continued*
Windmill, windmill for the land.
Turn forever hand in hand
Take it all in on your stride
It is sinking, falling down
I'm making progress, yay! As much as I bemoan the struggles these guys put me through, I do enjoy watching them and the many adventures they manage to have in a 40x30 space. I hope you're all having a happy holiday, and if everything goes well I'll hopefully have another episode out in early January. Until then, see ya!
"What should you do when you've already got everything you ever dreamed? DREAM BIGGER!!!"
-Miss Nancy, Little Inferno
"Do you want to have a bad time?"
Sebastian Michaelis (Black Butler)
He's one hell of a contestant.
Traits: Genius, Neat, Perfectionist
Junko Enoshima (Danganronpa)
The queen of despair herself. She can't wait to inflict as much suffering on everyone else as possible.
Traits: Evil, Insane, Genius
Kanato Sakamaki (Diabolik Lovers)
The Sakamaki brothers are having a hard time finding a new sacrificial bride, so Kanato enters the Big Brother Challenge in search of one.
Traits: Childish, Insane, Music Lover
Yuno Gasai (Future Diary)
For unknown reasons, the goddess of time and space postpones resetting the universe for the 184th time to enter a reality TV show.
Traits: Genius, Insane, Jealous
Levi Ackerman (Attack on Titan)
Captain of the Survey Corps, humanity's greatest hope, and the 5th contestant of this season's Big Brother Challenge.
Traits: Active, Genius, Mean
Asuna Yuuki (Sword Art Online)
As the leader of a guild in a dangerous virtual reality MMO, Asuna is confident that she has the skills to win.
Traits: Good, Geek, Active
Hisao Nakai (Katawa Shoujo)
After being dumped by his ex-girlfriend Lilly, Hisao's life fell apart. He spends most of his time these days having manly picnics with his weird friend Kenji and entering reality TV shows to escape the pain.
Traits: Bookworm, Gloomy, Lazy
Miku Hatsune (Vocaloids)
The famous idol was asked to make an appearance in this season's challenge in the hopes that it will boost ratings.
Traits: Cheerful, Music Lover, Dance Machine
Day 1, Week 1
The contestants arrive at the house, a remodeled villa in a beautiful desert town.
Also, I apologize in advance for the quality of some of the screenshots. The next part (hopefully) won't be littered with so many noob mistakes.
The first weekly task will be painting. You know the drill - the contestant with the lowest painting skill by the end of the week will be eliminated from the challenge.
The door mysteriously slams shut as the last contestant passes through it. They won't be leaving for a while
The gang chats in the living room for the rest of the morning. Asuna occasionally drops down to do push-ups...
...and play with her phone. It's pretty annoying.
I'm just going to give them a little nudge here, because it's already afternoon and nobody's gone near the easels yet.
Fun fact: Kanato uses Teddy as a paint brush.
I think this is the most in-character thing Levi's done so far.
Inside, Junko stares down Kanato like this for a few minutes. I'd feel sorry for him if he wasn't just as evil as she is.
This made me smile.
Unknown to Hisao and Levi, Yuno isn't really playing Subway Surfers with them.
Asuna recounts her adventures in Sword Art Online at the table. Sebastian makes polite conversation with her while Yuno blankly smiles and nods. Kanato's not interested at all.
In the living room, Miku tries to ignore Hisao while he stands awkwardly behind her looking like he's about to cry. This went on for over an hour. I can't decide which one is the bigger weirdo.
Unable to stand it any more, Miku finally retreats to the bathroom... only for Sebby to follow her in there and ask her out to a coffee date (not shown: coffee speech bubbles). Stay classy, Sebastian.
[July 28th: Yuki died. Again.]
It's about 9PM and everyone's nodding off. Levi and Miku claim the beds in the red room.
Junko and Sebastian take the green room...
Poor Asuna gets stuck with Kanato in the blue room...
Which leaves the purple room for Hisao and Yuno. Sweet dreams, Hisao. Sleep with one eye open.
And that's it for Day 1. Since half the cast is either crazy or evil, I'm shocked everyone got along as well as they did. That can't last, though.
Oh, and Miku looks awesome! Other than that, I have nothing else to say. :D