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ERO: Etheria's Romance Overhaul 3.3: One-Sided Crushing, Blushing, & Gender-Specific Turn-Ons and -Offs update

by Etheria Posted 12th Oct 2020 at 1:37 PM - Updated 13th Jan 2021 at 3:26 PM by Etheria : Added NOTICE
126 Comments / replies (Who?) - 2 Feedback Posts
VERSION 3.3 IS OUT! This mod requires S4CL version 1.54 or later, if you don't already have it then please follow the short instructions under the "Requirements" section below.

Automate your Sim's physical traits from CAS, see how attractive, how compatible, and how friendly your Sim views all other Sims, randomize everyone's turn-ons and -offs, enable attractiveness buffs on your Sims, and much, much more! You'll have to try it to get a feel for everything that it can do! There are even more options available in the shift+click menu on each Sim for an experience tailored exactly to your liking!

This mod requires the Sims 4 Community's Library v1.54 or later to run. You can get it here: - (alternative link here if SFS's servers are lagging)
  • When you update to S4CL 1.54 or beyond, to keep your mod save from earlier ERO versions, just move the mod's save folder from here:
    C:\Users\yourname\Documents\Electronic Arts\The Sims 4\saves\etheria_romanceoverhaul
    C:\Users\yourname\Documents\Electronic Arts\The Sims 4\Mods\mod_data\etheria_romanceoverhaul
    If a folder called "mod_data" inside your Mods folder is not there, just create it. Else, the mod does it for you when you save a set of new data.
    Your mod save will now look something like "C:\Users\yourname\Documents\Electronic Arts\The Sims 4\Mods\mod_data\etheria_romanceoverhaul\etheria_romanceoverhaul_main_id_0_guid_1517879296.json" (your numbers will be different)
  • If you're upgrading from a previous 2.x version, press the button in settings to "Copy data from versions 2.x"; your old ERO save data will donate its data to the new save structure and then empty itself. It feels so clean and makes me so happy! It's the kind of thing that makes a programmer smile!

Version 3.3:
-Added buffs for your Sims around their crushes, and the ability to turn them on or off!
-Added quite a few other fun new crush-specific buffs like after watching the romance channel etc.; play around a bit to discover more!
-Added special buffs for being alone in a room with a crush!
-Added more settings to give you even more control:
Enable/Disable Crush Attraction Buffs
Crush Level Change Per Separate Day Interacted

Version 3.2:
-Added gender-specific turn-on and turn-off lists and settings surrounding them!
-And as usual, if you want your turn-ons and -offs to be copied over from 3.1, just go to the Automate/Randomize/Remove menu and click the "Copy Preferences Lists from Version 3.x" button to port them over! From there, you can modify them further for each gender in the "Add Turn-On Traits" and "Add Turn-Off Traits" sections!

Version 3.1:
-Added Spanish translation by Athedutchess.
-Added many many more settings to give you even more control, mostly related to Sentiments to lay the groundwork for ERO's next version, and also to enhance any other mods that use or will use Sentiments!
Crush Level Change Per Day Known
Crush Level Change from Positive Short-Term Sentiments
Crush Level Change from Positive Long-Term Sentiments
Crush Level Change from Negative Short-Term Sentiments
Crush Level Change from Negative Long-Term Sentiments
Crush Level Change from Adoring Sentiments
Crush Level Change from Bitter Sentiments
Crush Level Change from Close Sentiments
Crush Level Change from Enamored Sentiments
Crush Level Change from Furious Sentiments
Crush Level Change from Guilty Sentiments
Crush Level Change from Hurt Sentiments
Crush Level Change from Motivating Sentiments

Version 3.0:
Hey you all! It's that time again! ERO 3.0: Crushing and Blushing is now released to the public! BOY am I excited to have you guys check this one out! This is the wonderful fantabulous CRUSHING AND BLUSHING update! Have your Sims have one-sided crushes and blush the night away, with absolutely tons of customization options for your and your Sims' enjoyment! Check it out now!

Here is just a sample of the feature list; the full list is huge!
-Press the button in settings to "Copy data from versions 2.x"; your old ERO save data will donate its data to the new save structure and then empty itself. It feels so clean and makes me so happy! It's the kind of thing that makes a programmer smile!
-Added blushing. (If you want to use blushing only from other mods instead, just turn off ERO blushing with the added controls further down this list)
-Added one-sided crushes.
-Added new traits: Parent (auto-added to Sims with children), Low Standards, High Standards, Very Overweight, Overweight, Average, Underweight, Very Underweight, Muscular
-Added support for new expansion traits Proper and Adventurous.
-Patron vote: Added nationality trait: Swedish
-Changed "Successful Flirting" buff from Energized to Confident.
-Added new buffs!
-Added interaction "Force Recalculate All Relations to All Sims on Lot".
-Added interaction "Copy This Sim's Preferences".
-Added showing crush level at the bottom of the "Show Number of Started Interactions with Sim" interaction.
-Reorganized the ERO shift-click menu to be prettier.
-Fixed nationality traits not showing up in the turn-ons menu.
-Huge performance improvements and code cleanup.
-Added optimization settings so you can change how fast the code runs depending on your preferences and computer power.
-Added many many more settings to give you a great deal of control:
Enable/Disable Attraction Buffs
Attraction Respects Gender Preference
Ask to Flirt Back
Change Attraction Thresholds
Change Affinity Thresholds
Blush Only from Crushes
Blush Only from Hotties
Enable/Disable Males for Blushing
Enable/Disable Females for Blushing
Enable Blushing Whitelist
Add/Remove Sim to/from Blushing Whitelist
Show Current Blushing Whitelist
Auto-Crush Only on Preferred Genders
Auto-Crush Only on Hotties
Enable/Disable Males for Auto-Crushing
Enable/Disable Females for Auto-Crushing
Enable Auto-Crushing Whitelist
Add/Remove Sim to/from Auto-Crushing Whitelist
Show Current Auto-Crushing Whitelist
Change Crush Thresholds
Crush Level Change from Flirting
Crush Level Change from Received Flirting
Crush Level Change from Deep Conversations
Crush Level Change from Received Deep Conversations
Crush Level Change from Embracing
Crush Level Change from Received Embracing
Crush Level Change from Kissing
Crush Level Change from Received Kissing
Crush Level Change from Having Sex
Crush Level Change from Received Sex Initiation
Crush Level Change from Trying for Baby
Crush Level Change from Received Try for Baby Initiation
Crush Level Change from Mean Interactions
Crush Level Change from Received Mean Interactions
Crush Level Change from Turning Down Sex
Crush Level Change from Having Sex Turned Down

If and only if you are upgrading from version 1.0 of the mod: You will have to reapply your physical traits and attractions (there is also a "Clean Earlier Mod Data from Save" option inside the ERO Settings menu -> Automate/Randomize/Remove section for extra cleanup), but this should be the only trait reset of that kind you'll need to do for this mod.

Compatibility is a priority in this mod; it is made to enhance the Sims experience and work harmoniously alongside any other mods like it. There are no known conflicts right now: that includes anything made by KiaraSims4Mods, Lumpinou, Turbo, KawaiiStacie, etc. If you do discover any conflicts with other mods, especially romance mods, please let me know and I'll check it out when I can.

For all those who would like to translate this mod, thank you! No reposts of ERO to other sites are allowed, so send me your translation and I will add it to the mod, and then you can link to it from other sites.

Known Issues:
  • The dialog box text in the Settings menu will start moving down more and more after you add attractions. This is not actually an issue with this specific mod, but rather many mods that have menus in general, and it has occurred since one of the latest game patches. I'm sure will eventually be fixed, but it's pretty low priority since all you have to do is reopen the menu.
  • When automating a Sim's physical traits based on their CAS data, a Sim's eyebrow hair color will sometimes be chosen as their hair color instead of their head hair color if the two are different. This is an issue with how the Sims 4 assigns tags; both eyebrow hair and head hair colors use the head hair color tags, and I only allow automation of physical traits to assign one hair color to a Sim. The fix for this right now is to set their hair color manually if you see it chose the eyebrow color instead. Sims 4 tags also have other weird issues: see extra screenshots of this with the hair and eye color examples in the screenshots at the top of this post.
Some of the Sims 4's tags are wildly inaccurate. For one particularly bad example, the game labels both red and purple eyes as "amber" eyes (I don't even ). There's more detail in the two CAS screenshots included in the pictures section above, but right now the only fix is to set these strangely-tagged ones manually (the full list of hair and eye colors and EA's versus my tags is in those screenies).

The Sims is a game we know and love for its ability to engross us in making lives of our own full choosing and control, but let's face it: for many of us, it doesn't really feel real in certain aspects of the vanilla game. One of the biggest of these for me is the romance, or rather, the lack thereof! When Sims touch and kiss, they barely get closer to each other for more than a second! C'mon, who the heck hugs their partner like that?! Things like this mean it often feels like the game treats romance as a side-gimmick rather than a real and fully-fleshed-out part of life, and I find myself feeling dissatisfied with how the Sims I have who are supposed to be completely head-over-heels for each other are just...coexisting lukewarmly. I aim to be part of what changes that, with a mixture of attractions, affinities/compatibilities, and opinions your Sim has to/about other Sims, among many other features!

So I felt like creating a mod that makes romance a thing in the Sims that people can connect with, one that's best made possible through a unique union of code, animation, and storytelling!

An attractiveness system based on both looks and personality, but also life experience!

Ever wanted to feel more attracted to the Sim of your dreams? What if a guy has gray hair and that's just not your thing? What if she's short (you didn't forget about height slider mods, did you?) and that's totally your thing (cute teddy-sized girls, amirite?!)? What if the Sim has kids and even though you're looking for a serious relationship, you're just not ready for possibly becoming a step-mom? Sorry Simdr date, you're great but that?s just too much for my Sim to handle at this point in their life!

Or if she's an airhead who spends half of her day talking on her phone and only ever wants to talk about her friends and makeup? Boorring.

That sweet introverted girl who is quiet to most, but opens up like a blooming flower when you start talking about video games? Totally your style.

The guy who takes a ridiculous amount of pride in his hair and his swag? Ooh, a bad boy's the one for you, eh? Your Sim has a high Affinity for that! Or at least for now they do!

Has your Sim dated 20 different Sims and their secret admirer is a complete relationship newbie? Well, maybe that admirer won't feel so warm towards you after finding that little piece of info out through the grapevine!

Want to know if a Sim has had their first kiss? Ask them! Want to know who that person was? You can ask them that too, but careful, they may not want to answer if they don't know you well enough or think you're a jealous and destructive person!

Or what if a girl's a homewrecker basically as a hobby, specifically seeking out men who are already taken and trying to Woohoo their brains out like it's some sort of winner-takes-all game? ...That would be kinda hot to some Sims, huh?

Maybe your Sim wants to try out that classic temptation vs. foundation in their love life only to regret it horribly later as they're forced by their spouse to tell their kids about their affair? Ddrrraama!
These are all examples of the kinds of scenarios you can insert into your game with ERO! You decide, with an attractiveness system that makes BOTH physique AND personality come into play!
(Seeing attractive features and personalities will make your Sim feel flirty. If your Sim sees someone who has a certain number of traits they find attractive, they will get whims to want to flirt with them!)

Totally new, custom animations for your Sims [future]

What can bring a romance to life more than ANIMATIONS, amirite?! Happily, I am not only a dreamer of what love can be, but also an animator! Thus, through connecting with the game's code, a huge chunk of the interactions I add will have their own custom animations. Let's get those snuggles, cuddles, and kisses to the next level, and make flirting feel real.

Real affection, real touching. Real smooth~

Add your favorite traits from other modders via my Settings menu instead of using a precious trait slot in CAS

Ever wanted to have more than 3 traits on your Sim, especially since there are so many good custom content ones? Want your favorite trait to be included in the Attractiveness system? Me too! Included is support for some of my favorite traits to play with, the Greek god-inspired traits by PurpleThistles! You may play with different traits than me, so I'll start by supporting some of a handful of my favorites by other modders, but then will add support for the most wanted traits. This way you can add as many traits from your mod folder to a Sim as you want! Supporters can vote on which trait I'll support next. This requires you to make just one tiny modification to the trait in most cases (change the trait type from "PERSONALITY" to "GAMEPLAY" in Sims 4 Studio), which is a very simple process shown in this gif:

You must have the expansion or stuff packs listed below installed to use this custom content. Please see the post text for any exceptions.

Sims 4
Key: - File was updated after upload was posted
Filename - Tip: You can click the magnifying glass to see the archive contents Size Downloads Date | Requires S4CL v1.54 or later

Size: 767.3 KB · Downloads: 11,073 · 13th Jan 2021
767.3 KB 11,073 13th Jan 2021
Don't forget to Thank the creator after downloading! Use the Thanks button located above the screenshots above.
Basic Download and Install Instructions:
1. Download: Click the File tab to see the download link. Click the link to save the .rar or .zip file(s) to your computer.
Read the upload description for installation instructions. If nothing else is specified, do the following:
2. Extract: Use WinRAR (Windows) to extract the .package file(s) (if included, ts4script as well) from the .rar or .zip file(s).
3. Cut and paste the .package file(s) (if included, ts4script as well) into your Mods folder
  • Windows XP: Documents and Settings\(Current User Account)\My Documents\Electronic Arts\The Sims 4\Mods\
  • Windows Vista/7/8/8.1: Users\(Current User Account)\Documents\Electronic Arts\The Sims 4\Mods\

Need more information?
  • Anyone can use both .rar and .zip files easily! On Windows, use WinRAR.
  • If you don't have a Mods folder, just make one.
  • Mod still not working? Make sure you have script mods enabled
126 Comments / Replies (Who?) - 103 Feedback Posts, 18 Thanks Posts
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Test Subject
#126 Old 8th Jan 2021 at 11:00 AM Last edited by xxXxxyen : 8th Jan 2021 at 11:41 AM.
Hi! Thanks for the mod, it's amazing!

If it's possib1e, wou1d you be ab1e to make the 1gbtqia+ traits (in the gender preference settings) more compatiba1e with PimpMySims4's 1gbt mod? It a1ready has a11 the 1gbtqia+ traits that your mod offers (and more) so I'm worried about them conf1icting with each other/not working together?

If not, that's a1right, I cou1d a1ways just a1ternate between the two uwu
You can check it out here

A1so, the south african trait keeps showing up as austrian when I assign it to my sim, what do I do?
Lab Assistant
Original Poster
#127 Old 13th Jan 2021 at 2:16 PM Last edited by Etheria : 13th Jan 2021 at 2:58 PM.
Originally Posted by Afroshero
I hardly comment, but I gotta say thank you on this one! This mod is awesome and actually works! I don't have to question if I installed it correctly or if I did the trait system correctly. This mod makes it VERY clear if a sim likes another sim or not. I also really love that you get to pick how you imagine your sim traits to be so that they can be better/less compatible with other sims. Paired with LittleMsSam's sims Dating App, this mod makes dating way more fun! It was really interesting to see how my sim went on two different dates with two different male sims, found both of them to be highly attractive physically, but was only compatible with one personality wise. The other one she just felt lukewarm towards. This to me, adds more realism to the game instead of sims not liking each other just because they don't find them to be physically attractive. I honestly can't wait to see this mod progress throughout time, because I'm in love with it! Once again, thank you so much and keep up the great work!

Aww, comments like yours make doing this feel like so much fun! Thank you very much for the review; I'm just happy you can enjoy something I made because of my own playstyle! :D

Originally Posted by Muff-Puff
Hi. Is there any cheat to make a sim have a huge crush on another one instantly?

Yep! Make sure you have the shift+ctrl+c "testingcheats true" cheat enabled, then shift+click a Sim and click "Start Crush On".

Originally Posted by jumpinjellyfish
Hi! Your mod is really awesome and makes the game much more interesting, but it seems all of the NPCs are bi now because many males NPC like my male sim and females NPC like my female sim. So I have a question, is there any way to set global gender preference? I mean, so that most NPCs can be straight and some can be gay/bi, just to make it more diversifying. Thanks in advanced!

I'm not 100% certain what you mean by the NPCs "like" your Sims. Are we talking "physical attraction"? If you mean that even when you change your Sims' orientations to "Straight" or "Gay" that they are still attracted to the same sex or opposite sex, respectively, then that is indeed a bug, as the attraction to the other Sim should be removed the next time attraction is recalculated towards them (usually when the two Sims spawn on the lot again).

However, if you instead mean "crushes" in that your NPCs have a "crush level" towards those Sims, that is not a bug. So Sims can have a "crush level" towards other Sims without actually having the crush relationship bit with them (the thing that says in a Sim's profile that they have a crush on the other Sim). The crush value is increased or decreased based on the interactions the Sims have, even if they're gay and talking to the opposite sex, etc. This is partly so that if you want to change a Sim's orientation etc., your past interactions with other Sims aren't lost and they can crush on the other Sim like they normally would if they were longtime friends, etc. As stated in the mod description, setting global gender preference is an idea that unfortunately doesn't work well in the Sims since the game natively changes your Sims' orientations depending on who your Sims flirt with, and so any "permanent" setting of the preference itself would quite quickly be overwritten by the game itself. This makes it very annoying to change without possibly affecting many other parts of mods or interactions and/or causing unintended behavior, etc. That is why there are separate traits for this instead, so my mod can operate based on those, which do not change until you personally modify them.

Originally Posted by ofobsidian
I adore this mod but I'm having a weird issue where if I manually select a sim's turn-offs, they show up under turn-ons when I view their preferences. I think it's just a display error because everything still shows up correctly within the ero menu but I can't tell for sure. Doesn't happen with randomizing preferences, just when I manually select. I've shuffled files in and out of my mod folder for ages and I can't figure out what the issue is. Definitely not a mod conflict because I ran a new game with nothing but this mod and the S4CL and it still kept happening ;w;

Weird! I'll check around the UI and see if something's wonky in the code. But I think you're right in stating it's just a display issue and doesn't affect the preferences themselves.

Originally Posted by justpass11
Hi Etheria! Does your mod conflict with any of PolarBearSims mods?

1. You're gonna have to be more specific with a question like that and mention the exact "mods" you mean, but 2. I'm really confident that it does not.

Originally Posted by xxXxxyen
Hi! Thanks for the mod, it's amazing!

If it's possib1e, wou1d you be ab1e to make the 1gbtqia+ traits (in the gender preference settings) more compatiba1e with PimpMySims4's 1gbt mod? It a1ready has a11 the 1gbtqia+ traits that your mod offers (and more) so I'm worried about them conf1icting with each other/not working together?

A1so, the south african trait keeps showing up as austrian when I assign it to my sim, what do I do?

The traits don't conflict with each other, you'll just have two "Bisexual" etc. traits on a Sim, one from my mod and one from that mod. I'm imagining a case where I set a Sim's orientation to "Bisexual" in my mod if I detect the "Bisexual" trait from that mod, but what if a player has all of their Sims' orientations set up in my mod and then installs that mod for the first time, and their Sims' orientations aren't set up yet? There's no reliable way to know which mod was installed "first" and thus should take priority, so then orientations for all Sims would likely get borked. There might be some weird behavior that would cause issues, and the tradeoff isn't worth it given the only inconvenience is showing a trait twice. My mod requires the traits from my mod specifically to work, because else I would have to update as someone else updates their mod, which can create a dependency for certain features and makes updating a pain. As for the South African showing as Austrian bit, that was a display name error only; I've now fixed it, so thank you.

Originally Posted by chingyu1023
Hello Etheria! My subscribers asked me to make my traits compatible with your mod. Would my 100 Traits as reward traits add-on be already compatible with your mod or do I need to send you the list of my traits' ID to add them to your mod?

Hi there chingyu! That sounds great. I do have to add the trait IDs myself, but the trait also has to be a "GAMEPLAY" trait instead of a "PERSONALITY" trait, and I notice yours are "PERSONALITY" traits. Obviously you still want yours to be selectable in CAS (which only works if they're "PERSONALITY" traits afaik), which means the best solution would probably be to make a copy of your current trait package, then in the new package, just give all of the traits new unique trait IDs and change their "PERSONALITY" type to "GAMEPLAY". Then from that package I could grab the IDs and add them. :D

Hi guys! I'm Etheria and I make mods, most notably Etheria's Romance Overhaul (ERO). Check out more info here!
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