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Scholar
#376 Old 19th Mar 2022 at 6:38 PM
On this week's 'The Exciting Adventures of Dizzy-noodles':

For those of you who might never have had to wash up in the bath, and think it sounds like some kind of spine crunching torture, let me assure you - it is!

Not to mention carrying everything back into the kitchen to dry up and put it away, and then going back to mop up all the drips between the kitchen and bathroom.

The kitchen sink is completely blocked, landlord said NO, so the caretaker is trying to help me, but it seems to be getting worse, not better.

Last weekend I met the man of my dreams - who was taken and lived 5 hours away. My friends and I often wonder why all the good ones are taken - but I suppose we're answering our own question there!

Might have to try the dreaded online dating again, but I remember from last time (a few years ago), it's so much work and takes ages, not sure I can be bothered really. I suppose I'll have to just try and see if things have improved.
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Mad Poster
Original Poster
#377 Old 25th Mar 2022 at 7:00 AM Last edited by PANDAQUEEN : 25th Mar 2022 at 7:05 AM. Reason: Grammatical and Correction
My circadian rhythm is wrekt, my stomach is constantly knotted and this upcoming Monday is my annual with the gynecologist. I'm not very pleased with how my appointment with Dr. J (Don't know his first name) didn't lead to an upping of a medicine I really needed.

Personal Quote: "I like my men like my sodas: tall boys." (Zevia has both 12 and 16 oz options)

(P.S. I'm about 5' (150cm) in height and easily scared)
Mad Poster
Original Poster
#378 Old 26th Mar 2022 at 10:38 AM
Waking up and my father finally noticed that 2½ months of housework was enough to burn me out.

He could tell I was hitting a depressing low with my stress and struggling.

Personal Quote: "I like my men like my sodas: tall boys." (Zevia has both 12 and 16 oz options)

(P.S. I'm about 5' (150cm) in height and easily scared)
Theorist
#379 Old 27th Mar 2022 at 2:07 AM
Daylight saving time....................... Does absolutely nothing but fuck up my already-screwed daily rhythm. Absolutely no one benefits from it, not even the capitalist pigs who invented it in the first place any more. Why have it? Tradition?! Why did we evolve from sitting around a campfire in a cave then, surely someone would miss the good old days of being neanderthal hunters by that logic!!! /rant
Mad Poster
Original Poster
#380 Old 27th Mar 2022 at 5:37 AM
Quote: Originally posted by topp
Daylight saving time....................... Does absolutely nothing but fuck up my already-screwed daily rhythm. Absolutely no one benefits from it, not even the capitalist pigs who invented it in the first place any more. Why have it? Tradition?! Why did we evolve from sitting around a campfire in a cave then, surely someone would miss the good old days of being neanderthal hunters by that logic!!! /rant


Cows, cardiology patients, drivers and office workers hate it. I mentioned this before. Besides, it is an economical gimmick nowadays.

Personal Quote: "I like my men like my sodas: tall boys." (Zevia has both 12 and 16 oz options)

(P.S. I'm about 5' (150cm) in height and easily scared)
Lab Assistant
#381 Old 27th Mar 2022 at 5:38 AM
Quote: Originally posted by topp
Daylight saving time....................... Does absolutely nothing but fuck up my already-screwed daily rhythm. Absolutely no one benefits from it, not even the capitalist pigs who invented it in the first place any more. Why have it? Tradition?! Why did we evolve from sitting around a campfire in a cave then, surely someone would miss the good old days of being neanderthal hunters by that logic!!! /rant


Not even Neaderthal, peak evolution was monke.

BEEP BOOP FELLOW HUMANS
Mad Poster
#382 Old 29th Mar 2022 at 12:16 AM Last edited by simmer22 : 29th Mar 2022 at 9:45 PM.
Effing obnoxious unknown number from who knows where (different land code, I don't know anyone who would have any reason to call me from there) started calling me about 2 hours after I'd gone to sleep, and continued with at least 3 different numbers over a period of several hours, waking me up each time. Didn't pick up the phone, but the last time I tried to hang up multiple times and I think they kept clicking the call back button, so it took several tries before I managed to finally block the number.

Guess who didn't manage to go back to sleep. Too pissed-off...

Tried remembering why I'm so tired now. Yep, that's why... Had maybe 3-4 hours of sleep because of these nutjobs who kept calling (I don't know why they called and I'm not interested - I don't take the phone when it's unknown callers from who knows where, since it's always either nutjobs, scammers, or some sort of maketing stuff I'm not interested in, and best not get involved in any of that. The way they kept going on the last time screams scammers or nutjobs, possibly a mix of both.)
Mad Poster
Original Poster
#383 Old 29th Mar 2022 at 6:07 AM
Grease ant infestation in the water closet even though dad set a liquid bait trap...any questions?

Personal Quote: "I like my men like my sodas: tall boys." (Zevia has both 12 and 16 oz options)

(P.S. I'm about 5' (150cm) in height and easily scared)
Inventor
#384 Old 31st Mar 2022 at 7:00 AM
Quote: Originally posted by topp
Daylight saving time....................... Does absolutely nothing but fuck up my already-screwed daily rhythm. Absolutely no one benefits from it, not even the capitalist pigs who invented it in the first place any more. Why have it? Tradition?! Why did we evolve from sitting around a campfire in a cave then, surely someone would miss the good old days of being neanderthal hunters by that logic!!! /rant

I concur that everyone hates when the clocks go forward but we borrowed, so we must pay back (after all, didn't we all enjoy that extra hour back in October) - I am pretty certain that I did.
I believe one year in the late sixties (possibly 1968 or 1969), putting the clock back an hour was not done. Kids wore fluorescent arm bands going to school in the dark and there was such an outcry by concerned parents that it was re-instated. Fifty years on, has never been tried again (as far as I know).
The Daylight saving time can be a problem for staff where 24 hour cover is required. My sister is a nurse and remember one year her fuming about having to do an extra hour on night shift because of the clock going back. Her boss told her it would even itself out when clocks go forward...did the boss deliberately make sure she was not on duty when the clocks go forward (heads or tails?)...or simply eliminating the possibility of my sister bringing it up again?
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retired moderator
#385 Old 31st Mar 2022 at 11:27 AM
Quote: Originally posted by Ladysimplayer8
My sister is a nurse and remember one year her fuming about having to do an extra hour on night shift because of the clock going back. Her boss told her it would even itself out when clocks go forward...did the boss deliberately make sure she was not on duty when the clocks go forward (heads or tails?)...or simply eliminating the possibility of my sister bringing it up again?

Ugh, that always happened to me! But I wasn't a nurse, I was an engineer at the time working 'continental' 12 hour shifts. I always got the long shift but never the short one!
Theorist
#386 Old 31st Mar 2022 at 11:18 PM
Quote: Originally posted by Ladysimplayer8
I concur that everyone hates when the clocks go forward but we borrowed, so we must pay back
Isn't it that the "fake time" is the one right now, the summer one? So essentially, I'm not crying for sleeping in an extra hour each time the clock changes – I just want the world to stop messing with the clock altogether.

The dramatic outcry about kids going to school before dawn you mentioned really doesn't make sense to me. By that logic, for example, take northern countries during the polar night. Why don't they reduce the number of hours on their clock faces down to the eight night time hours during the polar night? Surely, they could have their clock go from 10 pm to 6 am, and then when it would get to 6.01, it would actually be 10 pm again. Because surely, the clock mustn't say 11 am or whatever if it's still dark outside. That doesn't make much sense now does it...

(... I understand I don't make much sense either, but the moment in time in a day that dawn takes place changes, and the dusk does not change the same way. Why are we trying to fit a conundrum of "sun's up by 8, highest at noon, hey lunch time, at 6 it's starting to get late, whoops – night time by 9" to the natural day that is not fixed in duration?)
Inventor
#387 Old 1st Apr 2022 at 6:22 AM
Quote: Originally posted by topp
Isn't it that the "fake time" is the one right now, the summer one? So essentially, I'm not crying for sleeping in an extra hour each time the clock changes – I just want the world to stop messing with the clock altogether.

The dramatic outcry about kids going to school before dawn you mentioned really doesn't make sense to me. By that logic, for example, take northern countries during the polar night. Why don't they reduce the number of hours on their clock faces down to the eight night time hours during the polar night? Surely, they could have their clock go from 10 pm to 6 am, and then when it would get to 6.01, it would actually be 10 pm again. Because surely, the clock mustn't say 11 am or whatever if it's still dark outside. That doesn't make much sense now does it...

(... I understand I don't make much sense either, but the moment in time in a day that dawn takes place changes, and the dusk does not change the same way. Why are we trying to fit a conundrum of "sun's up by 8, highest at noon, hey lunch time, at 6 it's starting to get late, whoops – night time by 9" to the natural day that is not fixed in duration?)

I appreciate where you are coming from with wanting the world to stop messing with the clock altogether.
Should the world have one time - regardless of where we live in the world?
Do we start actually having 365 plus a quarter days per year?
All I know is I am currently alive and living in this moment and whether it is dark or light outside, I want to fill my time with things I enjoy doing most. Let's make it a good day today - it's Friday!
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retired moderator
#388 Old 1st Apr 2022 at 10:08 AM
Quote: Originally posted by Ladysimplayer8
All I know is I am currently alive and living in this moment and whether it is dark or light outside, I want to fill my time with things I enjoy doing most.

SIMS!
Mad Poster
#389 Old 1st Apr 2022 at 10:12 AM
I guess the landlord couldn't find anything to be angry about this time, so she shouted at us for drying our cloth nappies in the livingroom. This is our second child using cloth... but suddenly it will lead to a mold problem. We have a smaller clothes maiden this time and only dry cloth nappies on it now... but sure. This is definitely more of a problem than the big clothes maiden we had 2 years ago...

~Your friendly neighborhood ginge
Mad Poster
#390 Old 1st Apr 2022 at 10:13 PM
Quote: Originally posted by Gargoyle Cat
Your landlord sounds like a real peach. Sounds like she needs a hobby...

If you get mold in your livingroom from air drying cloth diapers, my livingroom should be covered in mold. I air dry jeans, t-shirts, ect... a couple times a week. The only things that go in the dryer are sheets, towels and that kind of stuff. Now that the weather is warming up, dog blankets go outside to dry. They're not large and don't take long. Depending on the kind of day I'm having, I either hang them over the porch railing or dog kennel.

I use to air dry a lot more clothes because I was worried they'd shrink in the dryer and she never had an issue before. She seems to just find fault with anything, last visit she told me I wasn't allowed plants on my windowsill. I've had some of my plants since I moved in 4.5 years ago! She seems very controlling, hopefully some day I can afford to move somewhere else.

~Your friendly neighborhood ginge
Inventor
#391 Old 2nd Apr 2022 at 7:11 AM
Quote: Originally posted by Bigsimsfan12
I use to air dry a lot more clothes because I was worried they'd shrink in the dryer and she never had an issue before. She seems to just find fault with anything, last visit she told me I wasn't allowed plants on my windowsill. I've had some of my plants since I moved in 4.5 years ago! She seems very controlling, hopefully some day I can afford to move somewhere else.

If I were you I would be checking the conditions of the lease agreement.
Your landlady could be having a bad day and finding fault with everything; unfortunately from a legal aspect just because you have had plants on your window sill since you moved in, doesn't mean you are permitted to have them; however I assume your landlady visits your home on a regular basis therefore the plants and drying clothes have moved from the permission status to being considered acceptable as it would have been brought up earlier.
You have more rights as a long term tenant than tenants with a short lease; your landlady is probably aware of this and could be trying to encourage you to leave (apologies for my devious mind!).
In the UK, the Citizens Advice Centre would be able to assist you - not sure of the equivalent in the USA.
Mad Poster
#392 Old 2nd Apr 2022 at 9:28 AM Last edited by Bigsimsfan12 : 2nd Apr 2022 at 9:54 AM.
Quote: Originally posted by Ladysimplayer8
If I were you I would be checking the conditions of the lease agreement.
Your landlady could be having a bad day and finding fault with everything; unfortunately from a legal aspect just because you have had plants on your window sill since you moved in, doesn't mean you are permitted to have them; however I assume your landlady visits your home on a regular basis therefore the plants and drying clothes have moved from the permission status to being considered acceptable as it would have been brought up earlier.
You have more rights as a long term tenant than tenants with a short lease; your landlady is probably aware of this and could be trying to encourage you to leave (apologies for my devious mind!).
In the UK, the Citizens Advice Centre would be able to assist you - not sure of the equivalent in the USA.

I'm pretty sure she wants us out. She changed our lease from 12 months? To 3 months a while back because she "can't trust us" (literally not a clue why?) So now she visits every 3 months and she keeps telling us to "consider social housing " because we "can't afford to live here" (we've never had a problem with rent, even though she's upping it every year or so). Citizens advice (I'm in the UK too) have told us everything is fine and she can't evict us over plant pots and drying clothes because nothing is in our contract about them, but also outside reporting her for the times she's shouted at us or tried to get us to pay for damages that have been there since we moved in, there's nothing they can do unless she evicts us... which for some reason she won't do. We're trying to save up for a mortgage now we've paid for the wedding, because I don't think I could handle another landlord.

I feel like she sees us like we're scum. I don't know why. My husband has a neck tattoo (not his choice, abusive ex did it) so I always wonder if that's why? But she was ok (albeit a bit snobby) when we moved in, its only since 2020 that she changed our contract and has been getting more and more ridiculous and rude. My anxiety goes through the roof whenever we have a visit.

~Your friendly neighborhood ginge
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retired moderator
#393 Old 2nd Apr 2022 at 1:38 PM
https://sheltercymru.org.uk/get-adv...hold-tenancies/

Quote:
Your right to live in your accommodation undisturbed
You have the right to live in your accommodation without being disturbed. You have control over your home so that your landlord and other people cannot freely enter whenever they want to. Your landlord cannot limit or otherwise interfere with your right to live in your home. If your landlord tries to do this s/he may be guilty of harassment, which is against the law.
Inventor
#394 Old 3rd Apr 2022 at 11:19 AM
Hello@Bigsimfan12
You might want to consider this https://www.buy-by-renting.com/rent...y-houses-uk.php
With shared ownership, the deposit needed might also be less depending on the option you go for.
Simsample is right the landlady isn't allowed to harass you; if she knocks on your door, you are not required to allow her access without her giving 24 hours notice of her intention to do a house inspection. However, it might be best to keep things amiable with just stating it is not convenient and to return tomorrow as you don't want to end up with your lease not being renewed and basically homeless.
Mad Poster
#395 Old 3rd Apr 2022 at 1:47 PM
@GC what kind of research? Like if you could go back and give yourself advice before buying your first house -what would you say? I've heard a few horror stories of people buying homes and then finding out its not up to scratch. My friend bought her house about 2 years ago now and ended up suing the previous owners over something (can't remember what) and it turns out they lived round the corner and started harassing her for months until she had to file a restraining order as well.

@simsample We tried reporting her for harassment back when she visited in around November because she scared Ivy from screaming at Adam several times infront of her during inspections. According to citizens advice nothing she does is enough to count as harassment. We did get given a link to report her anyway, but it seems I can't report her because she's not on the register because we rent through Beresford Adams (apparently. I didn't know this because we send our rent directly to her and she conducts all inspections). So presumably we can contact them about it but I'm not sure. Anyway she was a lot nicer this time, other than complaining about our cloth nappies. I'm hoping its because she knows she overdid it last time she was here and she might lay off us for a while?

@Ladysimplayer8 She gives 24 hours notice so thats not a problem. Though she is always so rude about it like we're inconveniencing her. For example she asked to do an inspection on the 24th Feb, which was our wedding day, so we said we couldn't and to contact us after to arrange something. On the 25th March she was asking when we were free that week, but we weren't so we said so and that we were free on the 31st and she told us "I didn't ask when you were free that week, I asked when you were free this week". Like sorry we have jobs??
I'd need to do more research on help to buy schemes but thank you for the link!

I think the worst part is my inheritance money (easily enough for a deposit) is all tied up in my great-grandpa's house. He passed away 3 years ago but my cousin has been living in the house since then because he desperately needed a house at the time. But he doesn't pay rent and hasn't sorted out a mortgage on the house so until he does (or my Dad/Aunt kick him out) I don't get my inheritance.

~Your friendly neighborhood ginge
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retired moderator
#396 Old 3rd Apr 2022 at 3:00 PM
Quote: Originally posted by Bigsimsfan12
We tried reporting her for harassment back when she visited in around November because she scared Ivy from screaming at Adam several times infront of her during inspections. According to citizens advice nothing she does is enough to count as harassment. We did get given a link to report her anyway, but it seems I can't report her because she's not on the register because we rent through Beresford Adams (apparently. I didn't know this because we send our rent directly to her and she conducts all inspections). So presumably we can contact them about it but I'm not sure. Anyway she was a lot nicer this time, other than complaining about our cloth nappies. I'm hoping its because she knows she overdid it last time she was here and she might lay off us for a while?


This is what I would do:
1) Document everything. When she requests access, what she says (for example 'I didn't ask you IF but WHEN'), how she contacts you. Also what she says and how she behaves when she is there. Especially any threats she makes or questions about your ability to afford it.
2) Check your lease with Beresford Adams- it might be worth calling them and explaining that you wish for them to act as liaison between you and the landlord. Tell them dates that you contacted Citizen's Advice and what they told you. Request that they act as a go-between and send someone to inspect instead of her. Depending upon the terms of your arrangement with them this may not be of any use- but it's worth a try as letting agents really don't want to have any bad reviews!
3) If she does arrange another visit, and she is abusive, ask her to stop. Say, "I would rather you did not raise your voice to us. Please state what you want us to know in a calm manner". If she refuses to comply, ask her to leave. If she refuses, call the police there and then, in the same way as you would if any other person was being abusive to you in your own home. This behaviour is not acceptable at all and there is no excuse for a Landlord to shout at a tenant.
4) Make a formal complaint to your Landlord in writing. Explain to her the problems she is causing to you by shouting/ derision etc, especially the mental health impact and the way it affects your children. Ask that she send someone else in her place to perform inspections.
5) If all this has no effect, make a formal complaint about her to your local council. They have a duty to ensure that Landlords are behaving within the law. See here although you may have already read this.
6) Look for somewhere else to rent. If you are on a fixed term lease then the Landlord may refuse to renew it, but she can't evict you without a court order and that does take time. However, you should consider that being at the mercy of such a volatile individual is not a good situation. Given your situation, what I would be doing is to put your name on the council house waiting list- you have a young child and a baby, and if the Landlord does give you an eviction order then you will score very highly for eligibility. Check the requirements for the Section 21 Eviction Notice here to see what she can and cannot do. I know that a lot of people balk at putting themselves on an authority housing list, but really- it will be a lot cheaper than privately renting, it is guaranteed as long as your eligibility doesn't change, and you won't have to put up with this Landlord any more. It could give you time to save to buy your own place. Don't worry about your inheritance being tied up- at the moment, that is going up in value rapidly as house prices increase!

I don't know if any of this helps, but I wish you good luck!
Mad Poster
#397 Old 3rd Apr 2022 at 4:26 PM
@Simsample Thank you, I've saved your reply on my phone and I'll make sure to document and talk to Beresford Adams about the situation ASAP. A third party doing inspections would be a good idea or even them to accompany the landlady when she visits to ensure she doesn't become hostile. As a side note we're on the council list, so at least if she does evict us and we become homeless, apparently we'll be put to the top of the list. So that's reassuring.

~Your friendly neighborhood ginge
Mad Poster
Original Poster
#398 Old 4th Apr 2022 at 9:31 PM
Just been working on psych studies and remembering my high school experiences when I was the big woman on campus. I was likable and relatable.

Can't help the fact that in the past year or so, I attracted three medical specialists who were big fans of Japanese pop culture. It usually is a surprise because I wasn't trying to out a geek and I just find myself trying to look for someone who had little experience with the subject, but it was a bust. I would find myself like a statue: covered in pigeon dropping in terms of how my days went. I was wanting nothing to do with a bias towards anything I was interested in. I was looking for a neutral ground.

Personal Quote: "I like my men like my sodas: tall boys." (Zevia has both 12 and 16 oz options)

(P.S. I'm about 5' (150cm) in height and easily scared)
Mad Poster
#399 Old 7th Apr 2022 at 10:05 PM
My brother's got in contact with his biological Dad. I know it shouldn't bother me, but it does. He's talking about this new magical family he's found and how they've been "looking for him for years", he's arranging to meet sisters and cousins and aunts and uncles. His Aunt cried on face time she was so happy to welcome him to the family. I'm annoyed. His Dad claims he has been looking for him for years but has he? He ghosted my Mum when she found out she was pregnant. He knew where we lived. We lived in my childhood home until 2013. He never came knocking. When my Mum died, social services tried to contact him. When I fought for custody of my brother, social services tried to contact him. Now he's 18 it's "welcome to the family! We've always been looking for you!". Pretty bad detective skills there man.

Its also a bad time, with my brothers health deteriorating. On the phone with me he repeated himself several times and forgot his birthday last month. He's been having a lot of memory issues recently. On top of him being in and out of hospitals and assisted living facilities because he struggles with BPD and schizophrenia... I just worry. I feel like this isn't gonna end well, but all I can really do is support my brother and be there to pick up the pieces.

~Your friendly neighborhood ginge
Mad Poster
Original Poster
#400 Old 8th Apr 2022 at 4:59 PM
Sex, drugs, rock and roll...with a heaping helping of depression-related symptoms of suppressed appetite, dull aches and fever.

Been venting to an AI to spare you guys my agony of pains of all sorts.

Personal Quote: "I like my men like my sodas: tall boys." (Zevia has both 12 and 16 oz options)

(P.S. I'm about 5' (150cm) in height and easily scared)
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