- Site Map >
- Community >
- Non-Sims Discussion >
- Social Groups >
- Family guy >
- Favourite Family Guy Quotes
- Site Map >
- Community >
- Non-Sims Discussion >
- Social Groups >
- Family guy >
- Favourite Family Guy Quotes
Replies: 19 (Who?), Viewed: 7293 times.
|
You are currently not a member of this group. Would you like to join it now?
#1
17th Jun 2009 at 2:37 PM
Favourite Family Guy Quotes
"Dennis Miller: I don't wanna go on a RANT here but America's foreign policy makes about as much sense as Beowolf having sex with Robert Fulton at the first Battle of Antetum. I mean when a neo-conservative defenstrates it's like Raskalnakov filibuster dioxymonohydrostinate.Peter: What the hell does RANT mean?"
Peter: I hope this isn't a ripoff like that breakfast machine I bought.
(Cut to peter in his kitchen activating his breakfast machine. A ball rolls activating a series of devices soon reaching a balloon attatched to a string attached to a gun. This pulls the trigger and shoots Peter right in the arm.)
Peter: AAAAHH!! WHAT WAS THE POINT OF ALL THAT?! THIS JUST SHOOTS YOU IN THE ARM! IT DOESN'T MAKE BREAKFAST AT ALL! AAAHHH!
Lois: So doctor, is Peter healthy?
Doctor: My goodness, you'll be dead within a month.
Peter: What?
Doctor (revealing comic he was reading): Oh, Hagar the Horrible, if you keep up that lifestyle of pillaging and eating giant turkey legs, you'll be dead within a month. Now, onto you.
Peter: So, what do you think? Pretty healthy, eh?
Doctor: Well, Mr. Griffin, let's take a look at your physical results. Argh! There's a spider in here. Now, here we go. Mr Griffin, you're going to expire in a month.
Peter/Lois: Argh!
Doctor: This is your driver's licence, isn't it? Now, unfortunately, I'm afraid you're going to die...
Peter: Argh!
Doctor: ...when you watch these Dean Martin Celebrity Roasts.
Lois: Will you just tell us how Peter's health is?!
Doctor: Ah, Mr. Griffin, I'm not quite sure how to say this. Kim Bassinger? Bass singer? Bassinger? But now, onto the cancer.
Lois: Oh my goodness!
Doctor: You are a Cancer, right? You were born in July? Now onto these test results. My, they're much worse than I thought.
Peter/Lois: Oh!
Doctor: My son got a D minus on his history test. Now Mr Griffin, that liver's got to come out.
Lois: What?!
Doctor: It's been in the microwave for three minutes, it'll get dry. Now-
Lois: Please, please, we can't take any more schtick.. Please just tell us, is Peter healthy?
Doctor: Oh, yeah, he's fine, he's just really fat.
"I used to have Multiple Personality Disorder but we're ok now"
"Click here to find out how to keep an idiot busy for hours"
Advertisement
#2
17th Jun 2009 at 2:42 PM
LMAO.
Stewie: Now, I'm going to do something I like to call the 'Compliment Sandwhich" Where I say something good, talk about where you need improvement, and then end with something good.
Brian: Whatever you gotta do...
Stewie (flips notepad): Something good... something good... You look like SNOOPY and it makes me smile... but you have smelly dog farts.
Stewie: Now, I'm going to do something I like to call the 'Compliment Sandwhich" Where I say something good, talk about where you need improvement, and then end with something good.
Brian: Whatever you gotta do...
Stewie (flips notepad): Something good... something good... You look like SNOOPY and it makes me smile... but you have smelly dog farts.
#3
17th Jun 2009 at 2:42 PM
Posts: 533
Thanks: 541 in 3 Posts
How have i only just seen this group! Im such a FG addict.
Couple of my fave quotes-
Holy crip hes a crapple!
Brian theres a message in my alphabets, it says ooooooo. Peter those are cheerios :D
Never fails to make me laugh
Couple of my fave quotes-
Holy crip hes a crapple!
Brian theres a message in my alphabets, it says ooooooo. Peter those are cheerios :D
Never fails to make me laugh
#4
17th Jun 2009 at 5:52 PM
Posts: 1,045
i like that one holy crip hes a crapple fomc-rotfl-mao
$$$ MONEY!!!!!! :D
$$$ MONEY!!!!!! :D
#5
4th Jul 2009 at 7:10 PM
Posts: 56
i always laugh at the one where peters stuck behind Robert Loger in the queue at the airport!
ROBERT LOGER.
-can you spell that?
CERTAINLY. ROBERT LOGER.
R as in ROBERT LOGER.
O as in OMG ITS ROBERT LOGER.
B as in BY GOD ITS ROBERT LOGER.
E as in EVERYONE LOVES ROBERT LOGER.
R as in ROBERT LOGER.
T as in TIM, LOOK, IT'S ROBERT LOGER.
SPACE.
L as in LOOK OVER THERE IT'S ROBERT LOGER!
*sigh*
lmao.
oh and the whole stewie and meg sounding silent Hs which drives brian insane as in: "you can't have cake without cool wHIP" and
"brian your being wHIERD"
theres some more on the newest season but i can't remember them now.
ROBERT LOGER.
-can you spell that?
CERTAINLY. ROBERT LOGER.
R as in ROBERT LOGER.
O as in OMG ITS ROBERT LOGER.
B as in BY GOD ITS ROBERT LOGER.
E as in EVERYONE LOVES ROBERT LOGER.
R as in ROBERT LOGER.
T as in TIM, LOOK, IT'S ROBERT LOGER.
SPACE.
L as in LOOK OVER THERE IT'S ROBERT LOGER!
*sigh*
lmao.
oh and the whole stewie and meg sounding silent Hs which drives brian insane as in: "you can't have cake without cool wHIP" and
"brian your being wHIERD"
theres some more on the newest season but i can't remember them now.
peachy! ♥
#6
10th Jul 2009 at 8:47 PM
Posts: 1,045
i likes that one
$$$ MONEY!!!!!! :D
$$$ MONEY!!!!!! :D
#7
27th Jul 2009 at 6:18 AM
A few:
Tom Tucker: A bit of breaking news. A local family is forced out of their home by ghosts. Who are they gonna call?
Diane Simmons (sighs): Ghostbusters, Tom.
Tom Tucker: No, Diane. Their insurance company. That's just stupid what you said.
(Lois walks in on Stewie torturing a bully)
Stewie: We're playing house...
Lois: But that kid is all tied up!
Stewie: Roman Polanski's house.
Meg (about Peter being retarded): I can never go to school again!
Stewie: Oh, yes, Meg, yes-yes yes, everything was going swimmingly for you until this. Yes, yes, THIS is the thing that will ruin your reputation, not your years of grotesque appearance, or your awkward social graces, or that Felix Ungerish way you clear your sinuses, no no no, it's THIS. Do you hear yourself talk? I might kill you tonight.
Peter (In Asiatown): Oh my God it's Jackie Chan! (Asian guy walks away)
Peter (to next Asian guy): Oh my God it's Jackie Chan! (Asian guy again walks away)
Peter (to another Asian guy): Oh my God it's Jackie Chan!
Jackie Chan: Great to see I have a fan! Oh my God it's Ethan Hawk!
Peter: No I'm not.
Jackie Chan to Chris: Oh my God it's Ethan Hawk!
Chris: Nope.
Jackie Chan to Meg: Oh my God it's Malcom in Middle!
Meg: Im not a boy!
Jackie Chan: Yes you are.
Meg: Wow! This looks just like my room at home!
Lois: Yeah! Except for all of the trophies and pictures of friends.
Meg: He's going back to Cecilia? I can't believe I'm actually jealous!
Lois: I can't I actually touched him!
Peter: I still can't believe it's not butter! Hahahahaha. Next week I run for the mayor of Quahog. Do I have what it takes? We'll find out, don't miss it.
Tom Tucker: A bit of breaking news. A local family is forced out of their home by ghosts. Who are they gonna call?
Diane Simmons (sighs): Ghostbusters, Tom.
Tom Tucker: No, Diane. Their insurance company. That's just stupid what you said.
(Lois walks in on Stewie torturing a bully)
Stewie: We're playing house...
Lois: But that kid is all tied up!
Stewie: Roman Polanski's house.
Meg (about Peter being retarded): I can never go to school again!
Stewie: Oh, yes, Meg, yes-yes yes, everything was going swimmingly for you until this. Yes, yes, THIS is the thing that will ruin your reputation, not your years of grotesque appearance, or your awkward social graces, or that Felix Ungerish way you clear your sinuses, no no no, it's THIS. Do you hear yourself talk? I might kill you tonight.
Peter (In Asiatown): Oh my God it's Jackie Chan! (Asian guy walks away)
Peter (to next Asian guy): Oh my God it's Jackie Chan! (Asian guy again walks away)
Peter (to another Asian guy): Oh my God it's Jackie Chan!
Jackie Chan: Great to see I have a fan! Oh my God it's Ethan Hawk!
Peter: No I'm not.
Jackie Chan to Chris: Oh my God it's Ethan Hawk!
Chris: Nope.
Jackie Chan to Meg: Oh my God it's Malcom in Middle!
Meg: Im not a boy!
Jackie Chan: Yes you are.
Meg: Wow! This looks just like my room at home!
Lois: Yeah! Except for all of the trophies and pictures of friends.
Meg: He's going back to Cecilia? I can't believe I'm actually jealous!
Lois: I can't I actually touched him!
Peter: I still can't believe it's not butter! Hahahahaha. Next week I run for the mayor of Quahog. Do I have what it takes? We'll find out, don't miss it.
~~~The Official Nintendork Island~~~
"I cannot love you like this anymore..... Alejandro"
"I cannot love you like this anymore..... Alejandro"
#8
27th Jul 2009 at 7:41 AM
Posts: 1,045
Jillian: i was watching this thing on tv about hitler and someone should really stop him.
Stewie: ohhh shes retarted.
Brian: shutup.
$$$ MONEY!!!!!! :D
Stewie: ohhh shes retarted.
Brian: shutup.
$$$ MONEY!!!!!! :D
#9
27th Jul 2009 at 1:21 PM
Posts: 83
I love the episode where Louis's sister is having a baby and their all driving to the hospital.
Louis:Peter why are we stopping?!
Peter:Yeah, I'll have 3 cheesburgers.
Louis:Peter shes having a baby!
Peter:Oh yeah, and a kids meal.Hey, if I get fries would anyone else want some 'cause then I wouldn't.
(Later at the Hospital)
Louis:Mam this woman is having a baby!
Random Man:Hey I was here first!Excuse me but my leg is asleep.
That episode cracks me up!!!!
Screw the soviet union.British people take us over with 3vil cream filled bisciuts.
Toast scares me! AHHHH!!! i srem for stpid reasons!!1! ^_^ Pie is like people.only pie dosen't destrOY ECONIMIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:(
Louis:Peter why are we stopping?!
Peter:Yeah, I'll have 3 cheesburgers.
Louis:Peter shes having a baby!
Peter:Oh yeah, and a kids meal.Hey, if I get fries would anyone else want some 'cause then I wouldn't.
(Later at the Hospital)
Louis:Mam this woman is having a baby!
Random Man:Hey I was here first!Excuse me but my leg is asleep.
That episode cracks me up!!!!
Screw the soviet union.British people take us over with 3vil cream filled bisciuts.
Toast scares me! AHHHH!!! i srem for stpid reasons!!1! ^_^ Pie is like people.only pie dosen't destrOY ECONIMIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:(
#10
29th Jul 2009 at 1:05 AM
Also:
Chris Teacher: How's your oatmeal dear?
Teacher's Husband: "It kinda taste funny"
*BEAR GROWLS*
Teachers Husband: "AHHH!!! There's a bear in my oatmeal!!!"
Chris Teacher: How's your oatmeal dear?
Teacher's Husband: "It kinda taste funny"
*BEAR GROWLS*
Teachers Husband: "AHHH!!! There's a bear in my oatmeal!!!"
~~~The Official Nintendork Island~~~
"I cannot love you like this anymore..... Alejandro"
"I cannot love you like this anymore..... Alejandro"
#11
31st Jul 2009 at 8:21 AM
^^^
Read
Read
~~~The Official Nintendork Island~~~
"I cannot love you like this anymore..... Alejandro"
"I cannot love you like this anymore..... Alejandro"
#12
31st Jul 2009 at 8:32 AM
Posts: 1,045
$$$ MONEY!!!!!! :D
#13
1st Aug 2009 at 6:13 AM
Posts: 600
Brian:Alright,let me hear it
Stewie,Susie,your a girl
Brian:Dude,there is a million songs named after a girl.
Stewie:Oh yeah?Name 20
Brian:~Name's alot~
Stewie:~Bashes guitar~ Go Fuc* yourself ~Walks off
ELOOOOOOO x) http://nintendorkhome.forumotion.net/index.htm
My website.Please register!Off-topic talking on my website!
I'm back G's! "One More Time G" "AND I'M SOOOOO ANXIOUS"
............ xD
Stewie,Susie,your a girl
Brian:Dude,there is a million songs named after a girl.
Stewie:Oh yeah?Name 20
Brian:~Name's alot~
Stewie:~Bashes guitar~ Go Fuc* yourself ~Walks off
ELOOOOOOO x) http://nintendorkhome.forumotion.net/index.htm
My website.Please register!Off-topic talking on my website!
I'm back G's! "One More Time G" "AND I'M SOOOOO ANXIOUS"
............ xD
#14
1st Aug 2009 at 7:36 AM
Posts: 1,045
that one is good
peter spits nicotine chew into cup
stewie> oh thats where i put my milk
brian> stewie n... thought comes up of stewie beating up brian oh never mind
stewie drinks it ahh screams
peter spits more chew in stewies mouth
stewie> AHHHHHH
$$$ MONEY!!!!!! :D
peter spits nicotine chew into cup
stewie> oh thats where i put my milk
brian> stewie n... thought comes up of stewie beating up brian oh never mind
stewie drinks it ahh screams
peter spits more chew in stewies mouth
stewie> AHHHHHH
$$$ MONEY!!!!!! :D
#15
3rd Aug 2009 at 5:29 PM
Posts: 311
Thanks: 289 in 2 Posts
Meg: Well can I at least think about you in the tub later?
Connie: No.
Meg: .................................. I'm still gonna.
&&
Peter: (to Connie) I like what you're doin' with your boobs.
Chris: DAD!
When the smoke clears, you can consider us even.
Connie: No.
Meg: .................................. I'm still gonna.
&&
Peter: (to Connie) I like what you're doin' with your boobs.
Chris: DAD!
When the smoke clears, you can consider us even.
#16
28th Aug 2009 at 7:52 PM
Posts: 57
Stewie (his voice getting progressively higher): Oh I know it hurts now Brian, but look at the bright side: you have some new material for that novel you've been writing. You know...the novel you've been workin' on? You know the the one, uh, you've been workin on for three years? You know the novel. Got somethin' new to write about now. You know? Maybe a, maybe a main character gets into a relationship and suffers a little heartbreak? Somethin' like what... what you've just been through? Draw from real life experience? Little, little heartbreak? You know? Work it into the story? Make the characters a little more three dimensional? Little, uh, richer experience for the reader? Make those second hundred pages really keep the reader guessing what's going to happen? Some twists and turns? A little epilogue? Everybody learns that the hero's journey isn't always a happy one? (Voice returns to normal.) Oh, I look forward to reading it.
Oh, forgot about this one:
Meg: I miss Uncle Patrick.
Lois: Don’t worry kids I promise we can visit him once a month
Chris: We’ll be his period!
Singing in the rain! x3
Oh, forgot about this one:
Meg: I miss Uncle Patrick.
Lois: Don’t worry kids I promise we can visit him once a month
Chris: We’ll be his period!
Singing in the rain! x3
#17
31st Dec 2012 at 1:28 PM
Posts: 98
Thanks: 498 in 5 Posts
I liked this one from Peter's Progress:
Griffin Peterson: We're gonna build a new settlement. We'll have a happy new life, and we'll have equal rights for all. Except Blacks, Asians, Hispanics, Jews, gays, women, Muslims .. Um ... everybody who's not a white man. And I mean "white" white, so no Italians, no Polish. Just people from Ireland, England, and Scotland. But from only certain parts of Scotland and Ireland. Just full blooded whites. No, y'know what? Not even whites. Nobody gets any rights. Ahhhh ... America.
Griffin Peterson: We're gonna build a new settlement. We'll have a happy new life, and we'll have equal rights for all. Except Blacks, Asians, Hispanics, Jews, gays, women, Muslims .. Um ... everybody who's not a white man. And I mean "white" white, so no Italians, no Polish. Just people from Ireland, England, and Scotland. But from only certain parts of Scotland and Ireland. Just full blooded whites. No, y'know what? Not even whites. Nobody gets any rights. Ahhhh ... America.
Quote:
You will do foolish things, but do them with enthusiasm. - Colette |
#18
1st Jan 2013 at 12:30 PM
Peter Griffin: Yes, and we should do nothing to draw attention to ourselves as outsiders...
Peter Griffin: [Points at Asian guy]
Peter Griffin: Oh, my god, it's Jackie Chan.
[Points at another Asian guy]
Peter Griffin: Oh, my god, it's Jackie Chan.
Jackie Chan: Hi, there. Nice to meet a fan of my movies.
[to Peter]
Jackie Chan: Oh, my god, its Ethan Hawke.
Peter Griffin: Uh,no i'm not.
Jackie Chan: Sorry my mistake.
Jackie Chan: [At Chris]
Jackie Chan: Oh, my god, it's Ethan Hawke.
Meg Griffin: Mom, can we go get some food?
Jackie Chan: [to Meg] Oh, my god it's, Malcom In Middle.
Meg Griffin: I'm not a boy.
Jackie Chan: Yes you are!
Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot.
Steam ID: PadukSteam
Peter Griffin: [Points at Asian guy]
Peter Griffin: Oh, my god, it's Jackie Chan.
[Points at another Asian guy]
Peter Griffin: Oh, my god, it's Jackie Chan.
Jackie Chan: Hi, there. Nice to meet a fan of my movies.
[to Peter]
Jackie Chan: Oh, my god, its Ethan Hawke.
Peter Griffin: Uh,no i'm not.
Jackie Chan: Sorry my mistake.
Jackie Chan: [At Chris]
Jackie Chan: Oh, my god, it's Ethan Hawke.
Meg Griffin: Mom, can we go get some food?
Jackie Chan: [to Meg] Oh, my god it's, Malcom In Middle.
Meg Griffin: I'm not a boy.
Jackie Chan: Yes you are!
Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot.
Steam ID: PadukSteam
#19
30th Apr 2013 at 2:41 PM
Posts: 98
Thanks: 498 in 5 Posts
Lois: I'm pretty sure our washing machine is pregnant! I'm not even sure how that's scientifically possible!
Peter: Life...uh, finds a way...
Peter: Life...uh, finds a way...
Quote:
You will do foolish things, but do them with enthusiasm. - Colette |
#20
30th Apr 2013 at 4:00 PM
^ I remember that quote.
Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot.
Steam ID: PadukSteam
Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot.
Steam ID: PadukSteam
Who Posted
|